TL : DR - What doesn't kill a man makes him stronger, once he recovers from it. What doesn't kill a woman damages and enslaves her for life, with recovery a rare exception.

We're specifically talking about past experiences here.

As tomes of RP posts and reports coming from direct experience would have told you by know, a woman's past does matter a lot. Even a guy like Roosh who had sex with hundreds of women when he retired admitted he'd only want women with zero or low n counts. A man who is sexually very successful is seen as extra attractive despite his reputation while a woman who is too loose is slut shamed or considered washed up especially after she's spent her prime years riding the CC. On Tinder it couldn't be more blatant that 80-90% of the women want to fuck the top 10% of men. A man who fails sexually is an object of ridicule by both women and other men while a woman who saves her body for the best man / men is appreciated for her taste. Instinctively our standards for men and women are opposites.

While a feminine dominant society tries to shame men for taking her past into consideration, and shames men for the expectation of wanting either virgins or women with a low n count, while simultaneously encouraging her to be "sexually liberated", make "her choice" and on top of that later down the road, tries to convince a man that she has "matured" or is "over it" or "now knows what she wants" (lol the irony), we observe the actual scenario and know far better what's really up. Of course, there is always a set of women especially in more conservative countries who are 1-2 generations behind the current state of the West to try to play the "I want a virgin too or a good man with a low n count card" in the name of "equal logic and equal standards".

Whatever the strategy used by different societies, discussions of one's past bring up fierce debates on unfairness and equality. However life doesn't run on machine logic.

A man's past is a problem for him when it injures him deeply - either physically, or emotionally or mentally, and when he has neither the tools nor the awareness nor the frame to deal with it. If he doesn't find the tools, the results can be catastrophic. One only needs to look at what kind of shit men can land up into - violent crime, abusive relationships, suicides, drugs, alcohol, oneitis-- and every one of this is due to past trauma that never found space and consciousness to heal.

To add to the challenge, men often do not have support systems, those whom he needs in his low moments ditch him for the good times and he is ridiculed for trying to seek help. Man is ridiculed for even saying he has a problem. Even in effective support systems meant to help him, he has to face at least 50 people all calling him a faggot for every mistake and has to earn his respect (MRP, I'm looking at you...and respect you). A man learns soon that there is no substitute for strength and being proactive.

Let's make the exception for lasting physical trauma. Soldiers who come back with PTSD and worse from wars have often been found to have suffered lasting brain injuries and lesions, which are responsible for the symptoms. Some people with an altered personality have been known to have had a brain tumor in a particular part of their brain. So, physical damage is the one thing a man might totally not recover from. But that hasn't stopped them from trying.

But when a man does have the tools and cultivates some awareness and frame, the mental and emotional scars can soon be overcome, and except severe injuries that caused permanent damage to the body, many injuries and diseases can also be fixed medically today. Everyone who has ever contributed to RP awareness has shared their own tools from their toolbox for this purpose (for those who ask). I too found some really powerful tools for me, which I have shared.

Once a man has somehow found the space he needs to make even a little peace with his past, his problem solving mind gets to work, learning lessons from the experience, developing a new mindset and approach, looking at what went wrong and how to improve his results. Recognizing that there is no support granted to him, but the need must still be addressed nevertheless, a man decides to create what is missing in life himself, walking the hard path. It is a long an arduous road to create what has not existed before.

If needed, man seeks out discomfort in planned doses, gains additional experiences, works on himself and gets better and better every time with each additional experience, every failure and success until he masters the challenges that once seemed impossible to him. As every rep he does stimulates more muscle to grow afterward, men simply improve with experience. Men use their past to attain mastery in the present. Man essentially runs on the paradigm "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger". Of course let's be practical and add this line - "Once he recovers from it. "

This is also and especially true for sex. A man who has embraced his sexuality gets better at the game with every experience.

A man once awakened, doesn't mind systematically annihilating his past dysfunctional self to become a more evolved being.

A bad past however has a much worse impact on a woman, given her much greater sensitivity. It creates a self perpetuating trauma pattern in her that keeps her locked in it. If her past was abusive, expect her to have a much greater tendency to pair up with the abusive assholes and suffer all her life, even if it means her children suffer at times. 10 minutes of sex god and she is alpha widowed for life and can't enjoy sex that way with other men again. 10 years of riding the cock carousel before settling down with a nice provider means it's only a matter of time before she gets bored with marriage and aspires for the thrill of the chase again -- once unstable relationships, always unstable relationships. Or if she gets violated against her will, she can feel horrible, ashamed, dirty, even defiled and this can make it impossible for her to let go and enjoy herself with a future lover. There is no end to those complications and all the forms past unresolved emotions can take.

In matters involving any significant intensity of emotion, a woman essentially becomes the victim of her past pleasure and pain.

Bitter experiences can force women to wear the pants, man up and step up to the challenges, especially if her mama mode is activated. But these usually leave her still scarred bitterly at the emotional level. A woman who has to wear the pants in the house invariably develops contempt for the man who doesn't. Behind every feminist champion, you can always find a woman emotionally scarred to some degree or the other. Tough women especially carry boat loads of unresolved emotional pain. There are many such women who have manned up only to lose faith in men and carry bitterness and contempt towards men for not having the manliness that a woman was capable of summoning.

Unresolved past sexual trauma can subconsciously force a woman to make herself unattractive and unhealthy, which is what we see in many feminists, as a way to avoid the possibility of a repeat of that experience and getting hurt again. By comparison, men who are hurt try to avoid relationships.

The tendency of the feminine ego to seek refuge in the feeling of victim hood does not help in this - it helps keep her past alive in her. A bad past just gives the victim tendency a first class ticket.

The fact that women tend to be a herd animal with a significant collective hive mind component to their existence makes it worse. In one room, all that one woman has to do is to bring out her past emotions and you can be sure that within minutes, even seconds, that all the women are feeling the same thing. The impact of past experiences on a woman is simply deeper and bigger already due to their sensitive nature, and it only gets multiplied further by the collective pain body of the feminine.

We even see this any time she's in a bad mood -- they remember past miseries and mistakes in excruciating detail don't they? Not all of a woman's pain or emotion is hers alone, it's the pain and emotion of womankind.

Let's not even get started on bad habits. Women who get into drinking and drug abuse wreck their lives and the lives of their families and children in spectacularly horrible ways. And once it starts it becomes near impossible for them to stop. I see a lot of men in mrp in the OYS threads working on their addictions from alcohol to the smartphone and porn, but I don't get to see many woman come out of deep shit by themselves. They'll need help, if they are capable of being helped at that point that is.

While a man can get to enjoy the feeling of mastery at the end of his struggles and suffering and victory, a woman is still left with a bitter taste in her psyche and lots of unresolved pain even if she ends up succeeding. Even success doesn't seem to fill up a woman's emotional holes - you can see this with any successful woman who had to wear the pants to get there. There is some unhappiness in their tone, as though they regret the impact it had on their femininity.

As for a history of crazy sexual behaviour, when I see the stories of many of these women, with notch counts that would have been impossible without contraception, their troubling past prior to that, along all the thoughts and emotions that these women admit to having over time swinging across the entire spectrum, and add the impact of powerful sexual memory on their system, all I can say is that it's a case of absolutely fucked up, both inside and out. The fuck up outside just reflects the fuck up on the inside, and makes it worse. The biggest mistake is to assume and believe what they say as if the impact of such powerful emotions and experiences can simply be wished away by rationalization.

A lifetime spent running full throttle in one direction will never magically fix itself overnight.

As I wrote in my post on the irony of "Choice", it is stupid to think you are choosing when your mind has this much grip over you. These women may claim they are over it, but deep down their minds are still in the same deep turmoil of thoughts and emotions as ever and they have never addressed that. That software runs freely on the inside, just hidden. That won't stay quiet for long. Sooner or later their unhappy selves are going to emerge for the next round of seeking salvation elsewhere, or they are going to go crazy.

And that's why you should never listen to their claims that they've overcome their past. That as you will read below, requires exceptional work, the honesty to face oneself and take responsibility for once, and they should have clearly done it and have results to show for it. You cannot practice instability all your life and then hope to stay stable and committed one fine day. How in the world did men start believing that shit and even white knighting for it by any logic is beyond me.

So for all but the most spiritual of women, a woman essentially runs on the paradigm of being a victim of her past -- "What doesn't kill her enslaves her". Recovery? Oh God...

Why I said all but the most spiritual women was that there are some women who do find tools to work on themselves, a few do end up recovering from their past experiences, but if you've ever read some of the books written by them on the subject, you can tell that the recovery process is a battle, involving massive emotional releases, moments of very altered moods and the like - it's like 4th of July. The key difficulty is that women being more emotional, find the way of awareness and inner peace inherently more difficult, and have a lot of extra pain to resolve. Usually devotion, service, nurturing others and emotional methods work much easier with them (which is why more women than men go seek religion). But it is not impossible, and the tools can also work extremely well with them.

In fact most of the tools will work on anyone who is serious about using them.

Trouble is, many of these women are too deep into the grip of their own past patterns to get to the start line even. It takes women years of work to get to a point where a lot of their traumatic patterns are dissolved and we're back on a clean slate, though by then, they might not even be physically in their prime. Biologically women have a shorter prime than men to bear healthy children and then be healthy enough to raise them to adulthood. Men on the other hand, can keep their physical and reproductive prime up for longer.

The task of "annihilating their past unhappy self" is therefore much harder for a woman and needs more work. A man would find it easier to help himself or recruit help where he doesn't find help by default, but women really do need far more hand holding when dealing with deep inner pain. Sometimes absolute dominance is probably the only way to force them to start to work on themselves.

Biologically a woman who has a bad past or a history of bad habits, or even a very stressed history has a much greater chance of hurting the physical and mental health of an unborn child. In old school societies, lots of care is taken to see to it that pregnant women are kept emotionally "well fed". Just a history of lots of stresses, irregular hours of food, diet and rest can damage their fertility and reproductive health. No one mentions the impact of abortions and contraception on reproductive health and hormonal balance. A woman's body is a significant biological investment, and men are biologically wired to be repelled by women with a history of destructive habits and behavior.

Do keep in mind though that a man's bad habits like smoking and drinking and sedentary living also damage his reproductive health and T levels, but again, good habits, lifting and diet can go a long long way to correcting this. Fitness also has equally positive effects on a woman's health, but most unhealthy women I tell you also come with a significant degree of mental and emotional illness and are too far in a hell hole to even turn up at the gym. Most women who are unhealthy today are actually so because of an underlying emotional or mental problem, while most men are just plain lazy. In my world, women will have to lift, do yogic practices and meditate. For their own good. I won't accept those not willing.

Amidst all this, anything a woman gains in technical skill from her sexual experiences can easily become irrelevant. Besides, a skilled man can always train a willing woman (go to mrp and see that latest post), leaving her free to concentrate on the seduction part of her game.

I honestly feel sadness and pity for many of these women whom I see, broken wrecks of what could have been. I couldn't stay cold about it if it happened to any of the women in my family or life, but honestly, they're doing it to themselves and save-a-hoe is just stupid -- the foolish nice guy who wants to save them and change them just gets swept into that shit and realizes too late that this is way beyond his power to solve, and he might not even be able to get out safely from crazy.

In the case of woman and the impact of her past on her psyche, prevention was always far better than cure. Let's be real about that. That's why old societies were always so strict with their women.

So in the end, a man's past can end up making him stronger and wiser and he can look back at it honestly without toxic shame, with a degree of pride and gratitude even -- as a very harsh teacher, but the one he needed, that taught him permanent lessons. Women on the other hand, are often left with permanent or lasting physical and psychological damage from their pasts far more than lessons learned. Men become responsible for themselves over their past, women become victims of their past.

And that's why a man's past and a woman's past are simply not comparable. We're not denying that men too get damaged from their past, but unless its a serious physical injury, it is indeed easier to recover from that and emerge stronger than it is for a woman. A man's biggest problem is oneitis. A woman's biggest problem is alpha widowing and loss of pair bonding.

What doesn't kill a man makes him stronger once he recovers from it. What doesn't kill a woman tortures her for the rest of her life. And that is how it goes for all but the most exceptional cases.

PS : When I used the word "past", it wasn't in the context of reputation, but past experiences. Now about reputation -- A woman's reputation did matter enormously in societies of the past, and I myself know that my grandmother would have preferred death to shame and loss of reputation. But in a feminine primary society, the sisterhood will defend her in public, encourage her in private and bitch about her behind her back. Yes, that last part is true.

A man's reputation however is everything, especially in this kind of society. It is more vulnerable than the most delicate and sensitive woman, and as easy to shatter as glass, and easier to damage forever. A woman will cast allegations on you, even and especially false ones if it benefits her, her sisters will vilify you as a monster, your rival men, her orbiters, and envious betas will rush to her aid, glad to see your downfall, the white knights and SJWs will attack you, and the justice system exists for the sole purpose of screwing you forever, you'll be abused and raped in prison hell, you're out of the job market, the feminist dominated media will write any shit on you if it sells, society treats you in ways they didn't treat slaves or untouchables, and your best hope is to actually STFU and fight to the end -- rape of a man is the rape of his reputation and freedom. Once raped, it will never recover to the way it was formerly. Only God alone can save you if truth is on your side TBH. So remember Law #5 always -- So much depends on reputation, guard it with your life!