What I’ve learned and the questions I have.

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April 20, 2020

I’m rather new to TRP and to be honest I’m still trying to make sense of how it all fits into the real world and who I am.

I discovered red pill after my ex girlfriend had broken up with me. I was and still am seriously beta (I have to recognize it and try to change it). I made myself far to emotionally available to her, I have serious oneitis.

I recognize and take responsibility for my choice in pursuing this woman, and my actions after. It’s been a month since she had broken up with me and she is already back with her abusive ex boyfriend. I can’t help but feel worthless and hurt at times. I really did put my heart out there and cared very deeply for her and I’d be lying to say that I didn’t care anymore.

She had many, many red flags that I would never usually go for but I looked past them. This has literally torn my own perception of myself, and I have been trying to rebuild myself through self improvement. She said all the right things when we were together and I genuinely thought that I will marry this woman.

After all this I had stumbled upon red pill. I read it and initially I was appalled. Then I realized why I continuously have issues with women. I’m too emotionally available, I give validation far too easily, I don’t recognize my own self worth and what I bring to the table so I don’t know when to leave for my own sake. I come on way to strong and I don’t have an abundance mindset.

I have been recently trying to put into work what I’ve been reading, and to be honest I realize all the change you see from red pill starts internally from yourself and will manifest external benefits.

It hurts to know that this game we play, that this way to keep, maintain and flourish attraction is the only way. I used to believe in a fairytale type of love, but I realize even through marriage I will have to keep up this game. I’m scared because I’m not sure i can do that.

I recently went out with a different girl, and realized how little you really have to try. I didn’t pay for anything and I literally was quiet for 90% of the conversation. I just had to listen and recognize her shit tests and make them absurd. The crazy part is she was really attracted to me. I realized that AWALT is absolutely true. Given the opportunity every girl will hurt you if there is no respect or need for validation for you.

This absolutely boggles my mind, I was always the nice guy, the white knight, when in reality all I need to do is shut up, and play it cool. I’m sure I will learn more as time goes on and as I heal. I think many men find red pill after one too many heartbreaks.

I don’t know how to get my ex off my mind, even after everything she has done to me. I still worry, care for her and fantasize about the possibility of a future with her. I know it’s wrong I’m trying to stop. I’ve slept with other women since the breakup and it really hasn’t helped.

I want to be happy and I want to be healthy. I want to be able to have self esteem that isn’t dependent upon a woman’s interest in me. I can never allow myself to be hurt again. This breakup killed me. I’ve never felt this poorly in my life. I wish I had never met her, I wish I wasn’t this in love with her when it is clear I was a distraction, a rebound and a toy for her.

It’s time to build myself, become the best person I can be. Quarantine has allowed me to find time to reflect and I’ve been slowly working towards the person I want to be.

What is my next step in healing? How long will it take? What do I do to outgrow this?

TLDR Beta dude gets heart shredded, takes responsibility. Is attempting to improve himself, but still questions his path.

Post Information
Title What I’ve learned and the questions I have.
Author Arakkkka
Upvotes 78
Comments 75
Date 20 April 2020 02:55 PM UTC (12 months ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/655972
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/g4u99p/what_ive_learned_and_the_questions_i_have/
Similar Posts

Red Pill terms found in post:
betaabundanceAWALTshit testgamethe red pill

[–]Fabulous-Craft55 points56 points  (11 children) | Copy

The path is forward. Stop looking back.

She used you to teach her ex a lesson. All the love and affection you showered this girl with was nothing compared to her attraction for the ex.

Want peace of mind? Keep acquiring plates for more abundance. And banging whatever mess is willing to fuck you is not abundance. Test yourself and shoot for high value, attractive women.

If you're F closing while putting in zero effort then you're punching down.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 9 points10 points  (10 children) | Copy

See that boggles my mind, this girl is objectively hot. Great body, great face. I would have never considered myself to be punching down.

The path is definitely forward my friend. I have to stop myself looking back, and wishing for a different outcome. I will be better and different.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy


[–]Arakkkka[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks, this has definitely messed with my head. I’ve losses about 25lbs since the breakup. I’ve been monitoring my eating habits and definitely trying to find a sense of control.

Ideally I’d like to weigh at least 200lbs. It’s a hard road, but we cannot make excuse for ourselves. I will get there.

Self discipline > motivation Taking responsibility > victims mindset

[–]Fabulous-Craft1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Attractive women are not necessarily high value.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten-1 points0 points  (6 children) | Copy

When you get to the point where you realize you cared more about how women looked then who they were, you reach the other side, or Intermediate Red Pill as I like to call it.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

Initially it was about how beautiful she was. I really did fall for who she was.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy

Let me break it down for you.

The reason you remain partially BP is that you are shallow. That superficial hyper focus you have is because you don't actually judge women on more than their looks. That's why they can still get away with so much when they're with you - you over value their looks and need to take that poonani off the pedestal

[–]Arakkkka[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

So because they’re pretty I let them get away with shit?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

...this is literally what he just said kid..

[–]onlyanger0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

After a certain point, what’s wrong with judging women mainly on their looks?

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I suppose it only matters if you are interested in something more involved than spinning plates. If not, doesn't matter as long as the looks are off the pedestal.

[–]Jaggarojo21 points22 points  (4 children) | Copy

Fresh meat always gets butchered, you absolutely need to break down your old world views in order to give place to this new one. Nothing worth fighting for comes easy.

Welcome to the Red Pill.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

I’ve been reading TRP for a while now, but I definitely had to come to a point where I’ve accepted it. It took a while and I was in denial of this truth. Unfortunately society is built upon such menial values and morals. I have no choice but to accept this as human nature and work towards building myself as a strong man.

[–]Jaggarojo4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

Menial and moral values that have been of extreme value to the progress of humanity as a whole. The Blue Pill is absolutely needed to sustain society, but the Red Pill has the most potency on an individual level.

It's useful to consider the weight each side holds.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

If you don’t mind me asking what are the pros and cons of both?

I find myself thinking that my bluepilled train of thought has brought me here. That it has not benefitted me in the slightest. If not for me being a beta in my situation I would have been happier right now.

[–]Jaggarojo0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It's a journey. I'll let you enjoy discovering those things by yourself.

[–]BusterVadge11 points12 points  (1 child) | Copy

It looks like your heart is in the right place, and it's refreshing to read a post from someone who actually wants help and had put in the time to read about RP for a few hours or so.

I'm not going to lie, your journey is going to be a long one. It's not going to be easy either. The good news is that you're starting from a better place than 90% of the other guys out there in the world without a clue.

The very best suggestion is to lift until exhaustion. Obv you can't hit the gym during quarantine but what you can do is bodyweight exercises. Get some resistance bands if you can. Check out James Grage on youtube.

When my LTR of almost 4 years dumped me (it was over 2 years ago now), the only thing that helped me get moments of peace was the pure exhaustion I got from working out until I couldn't lift a thing. I also took up meditation but it didn't help as much as lifting and time.

In 1 year or less you will be laughing about this, and thankful that you are not with her anymore.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

My friend, thank you. This has devastated me. I know despite how much I care for her, I cannot turn back. I have hope that one day I will be stronger than what I once was.

I think a lot of it has to do with having a strong frame of mind. I’m still learning and I probably will never stop, but I like to think that having a strong frame of mind comes from self love and confidence. So I’m working on building those up.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy

The first thing to recognize is that this is a blessing. If she hadn't broken your heart you would not be here.

The second is to stop thinking the ex was abusive to her. He was just playing the game better than you, and get calling him abusive was just her hamster trying to rationalize why she's in the right for not being with him.

Third, it is ok to be angry. It is the fuel you'll need to push through. If you're financially able, order a home gym set consisting of a bar and squat rack. Otherwise order kettlebells and do body weight exercise.

Fourth, get better. It's not a game you'll have to always play, but when you do play a match you need to win otherwise your life will be filled with nothing but losses. Learn to play the game well so you don't have to always play if that makes sense.

For the first time in your entire life, you have access to all the information you can possibly need to finally take control of your life. This is a great dayv for you. Don't waste this opportunity, the girl she is now was not the girl you fell in love with, and she never will be.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You are right. She won’t ever be the same to me. I will always see her with a different view.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

Tough it out dude. Literally though it out. I've been dumped too. Time will heal, just try to keep moving forward.

I experienced it myself. I had this girl I was fucking, kind of fwb type of thing but it was more an open relationship without defining it that way. I thought if I was kind, available, giving compliments and trying to impress her that she would definitely fall in love with me. Four weeks into that and I got the "I want to be friends speech". I told her straight back if we are not fucking, we won't be talking. Stopped entertaining her via text, stopped being so available and suddenly she was back all over me, wanting to fuck and sucking my dick with enthusiasm instead of sucking it cause I tell her to.

Shit's crazy but it makes sense once you get the big picture. It'll fall all into place. Tough it out. You'll get there.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

What exactly is the big picture?

[–]gsp95113 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

The heartbreak heals with time and perseverance. Focus on yourself. Whenever a thought of her comes around, just let it come... and go. Distract yourself when that happens if the thought of her persists, but don't give in to negative and unreasonable thoughts. You're a good man and you're worthy of love. I know this all sounds like some new age shit, but it's the truth, it's how it is. I'm going through grief as well and I was the one that broke up with her! It hurts when a relationship ends, especially when you had high expectations and when you notice it could've ended much earlier (and thus abbreviated the pain) if you had trusted your guts and hadn't turned a blind eye to the red flags.

But it's a good thing you ended up here after all and awakened from wonderland. Welcome to real life, brother. You'll turn out a much better and sucessful man.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

That is the hardest part. Thinking about what could’ve been, and the dreams and hopes you had for a relationship. She had spoken to me about the possibility of children with me, what they would look like, etc. I was so wrapped up in the idea of a lifetime with her. It hurts to know it won’t happen.

I realized that I cannot base my worth on someone else. In due time I will heal. It feels unbearable now at times, and in others it feels amazing.

All men who are working towards something are worthy of love. All men working to be the best they can be a good men.

I will get there.

[–]SteveSan824 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Fuck the past. Live for now. Read The Rational Male.

[–]SerialATA_Killer3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy

You're a human, you're not a robot. No amount of reading the sidebar, listening to internet doofuses telling you to spin more plates, or having random sex is going to help you get over the feeling that you were betrayed.

What will help is valuing yourself and focusing time and energy on things that really matter to you. Exercise where you can, learn something new, learn to home brew, learn to dance, pick up an instrument, write a story, call your mom, anything. Respect yourself and your time, and healing will come.

Also completely remove that girl from your contacts and your life. She'll want to come crawling back to you after she breaks up again with the other guy. Have some self respect and tell her to pound sand.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

You’re right. I’ve never saw the point in “plates” even prior to this. I think it’s nice to have the option to have a girl when you want. It just isn’t the end all be all. At the end of the day I was betrayed by someone I thought was going to be the mother of my children. It hurts a lot knowing she didn’t want me in the end.

I’m trying my best to be occupied and improve. It really is debilitating but no excuses. We will get there.

I’m not sure if she will ever come back and at the moment I don’t think it’s good to think she will. It’s just hope for me at that moment. I hoped for a while. I realize she’s gone. She was like a hurricane and she had torn me too pieces. I will get better and stronger.

I will always hope she does well, I just don’t think I’ll ever allow myself to be in that position of vulnerability again.

[–]SerialATA_Killer0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Just anecdotally, I was in a similar position about 1.5 years ago. I thought this girl was great, then through usual hypergamy happenings, I found myself feeling like you. I was just becoming aware of trp, and so I cut her out. One day I saw her at a local bar, and when I went to go try to talk to her, she said "I was actually really enjoying myself when we weren't talking." So I went back to trying to get back on track. Just a month or two ago, about a after running into her at the bar, she started friend requesting/following me on social media. She even started asking my friends about me.

I don't want to give you hope that she'll be back and want to be with you. But I can almost guarantee you'll hear from her again, but it's not going to be to fall in love together. She just lost her security with her guy and is looking for security in you. Be prepared and think about what you will do when that happens. Until then, be sure to live it up and concentrate on you.

[–]ev3rynightfireworks0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

ignore her

[–][deleted]  (9 children) | Copy


[–]Arakkkka[S] 3 points4 points  (8 children) | Copy

Do you have any other book recommendations?

[–]allenselmo4 points5 points  (6 children) | Copy

Not him but I 100 percent recommend No More Mr. Nice Guy and Models (by Mark Manson).

NMMNG is definitley the most redpill of the two and will help you learn to please the most important person. Yourself. Achieve your goals and let the women choose you.

Models is a great dating book for when you're ready. It helps you completely be yourself and not dwell on women who are either not interested in you or not a good match for you. (Doing this demonstrates lack of investment and women find it very attractive so expect better results aswell.)

As a redpill bible there is always The Rational Male but that might not be what you're looking for right now as it can be a lot to take in all at once. Especially if you're still getting over this girl, it could make your mood a little worse. But it's definitley worth getting to when you are stronger as it might help you understand why your ex would go back to her abusive ex-bf over you (her caring and giving boyfriend).

Hope this helps and please let me know if you want more info on the books.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

I still don’t understand how she could give me up like that. I will definitely buy all those books

[–]allenselmo1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

My two cents; If her ex was abusive. Sometimes what makes a man attractive is his abundance mindset. The notion that he can treat his girl like shit and leave her at the drop of a hat because "Hey, I can just find a new girl".

This creates the illusion (or perhaps aids the reality) of a high SMV (Sexual Market Value). This is what might draw a woman to a man who behaves like an asshole.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

So where do I fit into this. Where do I go from here. I don’t want to manipulated, I don’t want to be an asshole. I just want to be myself.

[–]allenselmo1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Do not sacrifice or change who you are for a woman. You are clearly a good person with good intentions. Stay that way. Just do not change your behaviors based on what you think will make others *like* you more. That will come across as needy and unattractive.

Work on yourself and achieving personal goals first and foremost. The woman/women in your life should never come first. They should be nice accessories to your already awesome lifestyle. Become better, stronger and live life on your own terms. Do this for a while and don't even think about women or relationships. Gain some clarity and self acceptance/self love.

This will eventually attract high quality women, when you are ready. I would also recommend focusing on some male relationships. It's good practice for men to have solid friendships that can provide the majority of their social needs. Therefore in a long term relationship she doesn't feel burdened by your neediness.

Finally, be her emotional rock. When she is upset, you are level headed. When she is angry, you are level headed. When she is happy, you are level headed. Don't let her dictate your emotions. It should be the other way around. Read up on the concept of "frame" for more about this.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Thanks. How do I build self love?

[–]allenselmo0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

By doing the things I said in the second paragraph. Enjoy yourself, free yourself from others judgement.

[–]when_its_too_late2 points3 points  (9 children) | Copy

Never look back man. The true transformation comes with pain. You will either get hurt by someone or you have to make drastic and painful changes in your life to achieve what you want. Do you like a vaccine shot into your shoulder? Kinda uncomfortable right? Stings and itches! But better than having a virus for 2 weeks right? Same thing with the red pill. Take large steps, change things big time if you're serious, there is no easing into reality. It's like trying to loose weight, go you want to you will, and I think you want to move forward with your life.

I highly recommend over all education, reading, educational YouTube videos, just over all polishing your brain since on quarantine there is so much time. Sharpen your intellect. Also start working out, not for the muscle, but for the discipline.

One tip I want to give, is don't beat yourself down about mistakes. If you acknowledge them you're already ahead of the crowd. We all fall on our path to the top.

Side bar, read and reread, one time isn't enough.

Plan. Plan your next moves, create a sort of training ground in your mind and run through the scenarios you see here, or online or IRL and try to find solutions to the beta problems using red pill.

Best of luck! And remember. AWALT.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 0 points1 point  (8 children) | Copy

Thanks my friend. I appreciate your kind words. In your humble opinion what are the best steps for me to take going forward?

[–]when_its_too_late1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Also. Get rid of any blue pilled music.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

What qualifies as blue pilled music?

[–]when_its_too_late2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Anything that talks about blue pill vallues. About true love and women being so awesome and shit. Stuff women like.

I've completely switched to metal and jazz.

[–]StbRPG0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Hip Hop - Drake Nonstop, Life is good. Chris brown - Holy angel.

By all mean focus on: Status, money, looks. If you have any of the three then harness it. If you don't, then time to work.

[–]when_its_too_late0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I can't stand Drake's voice lol

[–]when_its_too_late0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

It really depends what position you're in right now. If you're on quarantine, definitely education in everything and anything that can raise your mental worth, and working out to raise physical worth.

Is there anything specific you don't like about yourself? Put them here (in the sub) and we can always discuss specifics.

If you're still out there mingling with people, I wouldn't go about telling everyone what you have found. Keep this gem a secret and only change your mindset for now, watch, observe. It's a fine balance between being red pilled and living amongst betas. Learning perfect self control and when to unleash the monster within is important.

The rational male is a great book to start with.

Cold approach is a must. Keep trying till it becomes second nature. (Oh wait the world is on lock down). You'll get it.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I will definitely pm you if you don’t mind.

[–]when_its_too_late0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Any time!

[–]MotiMorphosys2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Healing is a process which you already seem to have begun. Good for you.

Level up yourself in the big 3 areas of attraction: Lift (most of us have found workout routines we can do at home), level up at your job, and pick something you're good at and get really ridiculously good at it (easier at the moment).

Keep seeing other women to distract yourself from the heartbreak. It takes time, but spinning plates sure makes it not as bad.

[–]absolutelynp1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Im also new. I had the same concern and still have it, that its all a game and that just strategize against your partner. It is yes, but once you do it, you will see the rewards you get and you see that this is just the dynamic of things. It becomes something different, but its still "right". You become more vigilant and need to pace oyurself once in a while, but rhtas just what a realitionships is: its a little work. But as I saif, you get the rewards and it will feel right.

Also dont disregard anything the people without understanding it thourougly. I always was against spinning plates but seeing the girl sitatuation a little clearer today and how some girls want to be handled, I basically had no choice.

I also had the question how to I get started after reading the sidebar. You just go in the subredits like this one and just read, youll hear more real life examples and different persprectives and eventually you know what to do.

Message me if you want. As I said, Im also basically new.

[–]nameyname31 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Let me private message you.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Feel free to send me a message

[–]Arakkkka[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This whole thread is providing me with so much clarity.

[–]BryceKA1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

My last Ex I thought I was going to marry but once it's over, it gets a little easier every day. A year later I'm glad we ended things and am happy to be single. Idk how many people you've been with or whatever but you likely barely know what you want. Definitely need to get a better understanding how women operate if you want to have a good relationship. Mine was my first serious relationship of a few years so it was pretty hard at first even though the breakup was mutual. My situation was a little different from yours but one day you'll be glad it's over.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

I’ve been with 16 women. She was my first serious girlfriend.

[–]BryceKA1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Damn lol mine was like my fifth but some women are more interesting than others obviously

[–]Arakkkka[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I tried with other girls of course. Just never panned out. Most of my encounters are all tinder hookups. The dating world is fucked.

[–]alphaonthecomeup1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Going through it right now too buddy. The pain comes in waves. I’m still in pain and think about her often but some of the things that have helped me is talking and bitching to close friends and my mom and my sister about it. I have this journal where I write letters to myself about how she didn’t appreciate me and that I’m Better than her, whatever I’m feeling. Sometimes I write letters to her about how I’m sorry I wasn’t enough for her or how much I fucking hate her; again whatever I’m feeling. It is good to get shit on paper. If you ever feel the need to contact her, just don’t, the urge/itch/feeling will go away in time, just write a letter to her in your journal to get that shit out.

Not gonna lie i felt like the fucking man finally having a girlfriend at times. I finally got what I always wanted, but there were a lot of time she pissed me off and was annoying and just not perfect at all. I let a lot of shit slide that I shouldn’t have. Some of the red pill truths really are eye opening once you’ve got the girl and then they are even more eye opening once you’ve lost the girl.

They are deadass their own animal. You can’t hate her for doing her nature shit. It has nothing to do with you are as a person. Sure we fucked up and invested too much emotionally and now we’re suffering a bit for it, but NOW we know not to do that shit again. I hate how I feel sometimes and want to go back to the good feels of being wanted sexually and being the man, but to be honest, i know that I’ll feel those feelings again, but only next time I’ll know that this bitch is NOT mine, it is just my turn, to not take her too seriously and make sure I don’t waste any of my time doing any extra shit I don’t need to be doing with her to make her ass feel better about her shitty ass life. NO MORE SAVING HOES. Let them rot in their insecure feelings, the only time to ever sincerely validate a bitch is when she is making me feel good sexually.

Anyways I’m all over the place with this comment. Take care of yourself and try to find new hobbies you can do in quarantine- chess, push-ups and shit, reading and make sure you LEAP into some manly hobbies once this quarantine thing is over too - BJJ/Kickboxing, lifting of course, ping pong, pool, swimming, sauna, etc are just some examples

Good luck my guy. I pray one day these bitches hit us back up in the future, but by the time they do we are already way way way way way offff that shit.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I love your username. I wish I came up with it. I’m starting to realize that the “shitty” men that are out there are a byproduct of the mistreatment by women.

We have to hold ourselves to higher morals and values and pride ourselves for who we are.

We work hard, we take pride in what we do, we have passions hopes and dreams. We cannot sacrifice these for a woman. As much as I want to share my love and my life with someone they have to be in my life and not the other way around...

Once again thanks king.

[–]mickey__0 points1 point  (7 children) | Copy

I’m too emotionally available, I give validation far too easily

How, for first sentence and why/how for the second?

Given the opportunity every girl will hurt you if there is no respect or need for validation for you

You meant from you?

[–]Arakkkka[S] 0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy

Well I’ve done it somehow or someway in every relationship. In this case with this girl she had been abused her whole life. I sympathized with her, and showed my heart to early. I was too open to the idea of a relationship. I loved far to early. I validated her, and told her everything she wanted to hear.

As far as the second I allowed her to walk all over me, actively disrespect me and I validated her to the point where she saw no value in me. In turn she hurt me.

[–]VSelf471 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

I would advise to get the “she will hurt me if I give her the chance” mentality out of your head, it will lead to having -100 trust in any girl. See the exredpill sub for a while if you want to see what I mean.

Yes All Women Are Like That, but Not All Women Will Do That. AWALT tells you to that every gun is loaded and you should act accordingly, abundance mentality is key here.

Keep going man, if anything, decide what do you want from women and accept it, you want plates? Cool, go for it and don’t get attached. Want an LTR? Learn to vet and set boundaries.

Work on you, always.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

You’re right. I’ll keep that in mind. I’m just scared of getting hurt to be honest. Thanks

[–]VSelf470 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

It’s ok. We all are, nobody likes the pain. The difference is how it changes you. Don’t become an insecure, controlling guy. Become that awesome guy everybody wants to be with.

It all comes from inside, be the prize so no outside force will ever be able to move you.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You have all given me such invaluable advice and support. I really do feel the love from y’all. Thank you guys so much.

[–]RedKepler1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't say "too early". What you likely did was be far too emotionally present etc. For me it was the opposite- I'm shit at expressing myself, so it was like my ex dating a fucking autistic brick. You basically have to be emotionally present, not detached enough that your a sociopath but not so in touch your like the reflection of a teenage diary.

You have to be a stable rock.

[–]mickey__0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Ohh ok man now i get it, thanks Wish you the best

[–]nameyname3-1 points0 points  (3 children) | Copy

The Red Pill is a dangerous and all-encompassing ideology that radicalised individuals who are vulnerable and hurting. This girl did not do the right thing by you. However, if you think that employing TRP techniques will help you to move forward and find real love you are kidding yourself. We all question ourselves when something like this happens. We seek answers because we don’t want it to happen again.

I get it. But it’s not what you do but who you choose that’s important. This is not about you. It’s about her. You did not fail. She failed.

[–]Arakkkka[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

So what should I do then?

[–]ziphias0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Check out this users post history (particularly their first post). I would disregard her post-wall perspective advice. I lived through what you described - twice - in my life, and this sub changed my life for the better. And very interestingly, the women I'm with are now even happier, too, with the person I now am.

[–]nameyname30 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

What does my post have to do with anything?

[–][deleted]  (4 children) | Copy


[–]VSelf472 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

There is this thing called the sidebar

[–]SerialATA_Killer0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yes i will show you how to find the red pill for the low sum of $100

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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