I'm 19 years old and Im still a virgin. A lot of my posts on here begin with that sentence what follows tends to be a me vomiting my misery into my posts. Not to day brothers. I just realised that my fears of lonliness and remaining a virgin are unlikely to come true. If I look at this year I think of how miserable and lost I have been but then I think about all I have learned and what I used to look like not even three months ago compared to now. I can only get better, bigger and more furfilled. I don't hate the idea of having to go into my garden and get on the bench (yes I have my own bench in my garden it's just taken the red pill to get me to be dedicated). At my boxing gym I'm finely getting the attention from the trainers that my old ego so desperately thought I deserved. No I'm a shit boxer but I am there more than most of the other regulars and I'm willing to learn. My social skills are improving and I'm finely sought after by people I never even thought would be accept me. Girls shit test me all the time I just got to learn more and raise my confidence. I plan on getting a few audio books like no more Mr Nice guy. Because of the default settings on my Internet is do not have access to the entire side bar so I have to make do and watch videos on YouTube and learn what I can. To be honest I don't feel bad about the future anymore and I will just have to be content with the past but why give a fuck about it if I am addicted to improvement. The latest improvement is getting some chicken and brown rice into my diet and upping my weights. All I here is positive things that people say. "oh my God where did all your weight go" and "I love that you don't take shit from people anymore". Sometimes your supposed to suffer because it's the best way to learn. I'm sure the coming year will bring its ups and downs. Ill feel lonely and I will get rejected and I will embarrass my self trying to flirt and come home lonly like the guy from how soon is now by the smiths but if think rationally I'm always going to be better than I am today. Thanks to all those who have been putting up with my beta bitching and self loathing since I started posting. Your advice is often taken in and only increases my interest in the red pill.
I will not be ending this post in my usual fashion for example "what am I doing wrong" instead in will end it with how can I improve?