I'm 42, had sex with a 20 yr old Sat, now ghosted

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May 25, 2020
112 upvotes

Trying to figure out where, if anywhere, I went wrong here....

About a week ago I cold approached a smoking hot 20 year old Facebook friend that is easily an HB8 or HB9. Without going into too much detail she is a college student who participates in a college sport that is a sport I am heavily involved in (not with her or her college but in a separate capacity). This was my obviously my "in" I used in my cold approach.

We quickly developed a strong rapport and she was soon texting me and snapping me selfies all the time. This went on everyday all last week. At first they were quite innocent but gradually became sexier and sexier. I've been red pilled for 3 years so I've become quite skilled at building attraction and drawing women into my frame. At no time during our conversations over this past week did she mention the age difference.

She lives 2 hours away but mentioned she would be at a lake near my town on Saturday for the holiday weekend. On Saturday she started sending my selfies in her bikini from the lake. It was obvious she was drinking and was doing some hardcore flirting with me. By Saturday evening she was snapping me multiple full blown nudes. At this point its pretty clear to me she wants to fuck so I ask her where she's staying that night and if she wanted to she was welcome to come over and stay at my place since I was only 20 minutes away. She agrees and comes over about midnight.

She did the required "Ok but I'm not going to have sex with you" every female does which I just said that's fine. Basically as soon as she gets there we start making out. Eventually all of our clothes are off except her thong. When I go to take that off she gives me a soft no. I just said ok lets go to bed then. We start spooning to go to sleep and a while later she's backing up on me and ends up taking her underwear off herself and we have sex in basically every position imaginable. The next morning she gets up and leaves. I kiss her goodbye. Life is good.

Here's where things go sideways. A few hours after she left I texted her and asked her if she was going back home or staying in town another night. I was going to try to hook up a second date. She simply replied with a short "IDK yet". I said ok well if you stay in town you should come stay with me again to which she replied "Probably not. I'll probably just stay with my friend if I do". So now I'm like WTF but I just let it go and didn't text her the rest of the day. The entire day she doesn't send me a single text or snap...the first day since I started talking to her she hasn't done so. So finally at 9pm I texted her "Are you ok? You've been pretty quiet today?" to which she responded with a simple "Yep" and that's all. I responded to that with "Are you sure? You seem pissed." to which she never replied.

That was last night and she still hasn't responded nor have I sent her any other texts or snaps. Not sure exactly where I went wrong or where I go from here. Any outside perspective on where I went wrong or what I should do from here would be much appreciated.


Post Information
Title I'm 42, had sex with a 20 yr old Sat, now ghosted
Author KidBrody77
Upvotes 112
Comments 214
Date 25 May 2020 08:46 PM UTC (11 months ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/666517
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/gqizwo/im_42_had_sex_with_a_20_yr_old_sat_now_ghosted/
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Comments

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (4 children) | Copy

Take the win bro.

A few hours after she left I texted her and asked her if she was going back home or staying in town another night. I was going to try to hook up a second date. She simply replied with a short "IDK yet". I said ok well if you stay in town you should come stay with me again to which she replied "Probably not.

And that's where you went wrong. "...A few hours after..." Oof! Should have at least waited until the next day. Came off as needy/clingy IMO. Remember, when you have something like a large age gap, any mistake you make is going to be amplified. A guy her age she could forgive, but you're older and expected to know better and it caused red flags. Add on top of that ALL the other guys throwing dick her way she's got more options to choose from and you signalled your investment, which from the sounds of it was higher than hers.

Again, take the win, learn from it, move on. After some time she might be back up for more so long as you dicked her down good.

Never forget the 3:2 rule of thumb:

https://youtu.be/N72oKnc8gJk?t=995

[–]ViolentInteger318 points319 points  (67 children) | Copy

I kiss her goodbye.

You should have baited her into kissing you goodbye.

A few hours after she left I texted her

"I don't have other options since my SMV isn't very high, despite the fact that I've been red pilled for 3 years. You can probably do better than me, but can I please, please, PLEASE see you again????"

to which she replied "[...]". So now I'm like WTF

Butthurt due to weak frame.

The entire day she doesn't send me a single text or snap...[...] So finally at 9pm I texted her "Are you ok? You've been pretty quiet today?"

"Hey, I just wanted to remind you--AGAIN--that I don't have a mission to keep me busy, nor do I have other women who want me (you know, because I'm kind of a loser). I'm desperate for your attention and validation!!!! P.S. You can probably do better than me."

I responded to that with "Are you sure? You seem pissed."

Ugh. Dude...

Any outside perspective on where I went wrong

Yes. I got some tough love for you: in three fucking years of being "red pilled" you learned less than most guys that discovered the side-bar three weeks ago.

I am not exaggerating.

I'm honestly shocked at how you were able to hide your desperation enough that she even agreed to meet you. And I'm sure she's thinking the same thing right now too.

You've got fundamental problems in ALL the major areas. Weak frame. Scarcity mentality. Lack of outcome-independence. In three years, you've learned nearly nothing of the absolute basics of RP theory.

Now here's the single most important question anyone is going to ask you all year: What is your mission in life?

[–]flying-backflip173 points174 points  (11 children) | Copy

yea. She wanted a taboo age-difference fling with a hot daddy, not a clingy beta old dude creeping her out. Should went no contact at all and sit back in your victory knowing you just banged a 20 year old at 42 years of age, something most 40yo men probably wish for every night but have to be content with their obese wives.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 86 points87 points  (3 children) | Copy

Yeah I appreciate that. You're right. Well, live and learn. I won't make this mistake again

[–]subdermal1347 points48 points  (1 child) | Copy

Chased a little too hard after the catch, that’s all.

[–]Thinkingard0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Succinct and spot on I like it.

[–]Sora2645 points46 points  (0 children) | Copy

Live and learn is right bro.

You fucked a girl way higher than your SMV and your frame broke faster than she bolted out that door.

She was already going through ASD the morning after. That combined with your clinginess had her regretting the interaction with you in its entirety.

You should have woke up and automatically made an excuse on why she had to leave that also painted you as busy.

Such as, “I have a buddy I’m helping train in “tennis” in a couple hours. What’s your plans for the day?”

Best approach is laying low for a couple days. Don’t initiate. If no response, delete off snap, hard next.

[–]salezman129 points10 points  (6 children) | Copy

My bet is that hes been subscribed to TRP for 3 years but doesnt really read anything. No way he could, right? I mean sometimes a fella gets some action and forgets the play, but this, this is somethin else. This guy didn't know we have a sidebar.

[–]jrr6415sun4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

You can read all you want, it’s a lot harder in real life without practice.

[–]salezman122 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yea but I dont think our dude here read it at all.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you. I love the classic "read the sidebar" response to every problem. I not only have read the sidebar, I listen to Rollo and red pill podcasts DAILY without fail. Studying material and putting it in practice are two very different things.

[–]electricspresident2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Reading is not enough I assure you. There's tons of people that read but end up going nowhere. You don't exactly remember 10 paragraphs of trp while in action.

Practice is really the crux of it. You must summarise TRP in few simple points and then just run with it. Remember the core principles behind the behaviors.

Ask yourself are you acting like a winner? Like the Prize? Like a king?

Especially the older you get the harder it is.

Real change from Billy beta to a true and proper alpha is a long road filled with many rocks that will crush and build you, many don't make it.

[–]salezman121 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Why is everyone acting like I said that all you have to do is read and then die of suffocation by pussy? Reading is the first step...

[–]electricspresident1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Nothin was said specific to you. It's to the general people that will read the comment

Trust me there's tons of addicts that just read so gotta reiterate that

[–]KidBrody77[S] 33 points34 points  (22 children) | Copy

This is solid advice. I appreciate it. 99% of the time I have no problem with outcome independence, abundance mentality, mission, and frame. The only time I slip up is the rare occasion I do hook up with an HB8+ that's under 25 because they are scarce for me. I'm 42 years old. I don't care how red pilled you are or how high your SMV is you can't pretend that's always going to override a 20+ year age difference. There are some that won't instantly disqualify you on the age difference alone but they're rare. There are certain realities red pill cannot override. Single moms are going to care more about their kids than you. That's just reality no amount of red pill can override. Likewise, the majority of smoking hot 20-year-old women are not even going to entertain the idea of fucking a man more than twice their age. You're not even going to get the opportunity to try. That's also just a reality. The best you are going to get is a small number of women who are either gold diggers, sugar babies, or not completely opposed to the idea if you're SMV is high enough and your game is on fucking point. So when you get one and she's not after money yeah it's way harder to be outcome independent because they're fucking rare. That's just reality.

[–]SeasonedRP51 points52 points  (0 children) | Copy

When I read your post, it sounded to me like you know what you're doing, but you got overly excited because she was a hot 20 year old and sent some texts that came across as desperate. No big deal, it's happened to me too. Next time, just handle things the right way after you fuck as well as before. Don't behave any differently from how you'd behave with a 37 year old you weren't super excited about.

[–]thrwy7547923 points24 points  (0 children) | Copy

  • Fuck her like you won't see her ever again. It'll build detachment.

  • Always have something to do, or somewhere to be after fucking. You have to be at least 1 step ahead of her.

  • Rub one out, or do a heavy workout before sending any texts, even if they seem innocuous.

[–]drsherbert14 points15 points  (4 children) | Copy

Dude I’m 42 as well. I get girls under 25 more often than most people think. It’s my preference to have them. There’s tons of them out there that love older men, believe me. It’s not that rare at all. I’m also 12%bf, well off financially, ride a motorcycle, dress nice, full head of hair and 6ft(if that really even matters that much). If you’re a winner, you’re a winner. Age don’t mean shit. In fact, I’d argue that most women that age would prefer me over someone 10-15 years younger. I notice young women starring at me constantly. If you want young women, then go out there and get them. Make sure your shit is in order and they literally just fall into your lap.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

So I’ve fucked 3 in the last two years....a 19 year old, a 21 year old, and this 20 year old. None of them were fat or below a HB8. Two were from cold approaches. The 19 year old was from Tinder. Makes me think cold approach is the way. How do you get them?

[–]drsherbert6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy

I’ve discussed this topic a lot with my well off friends that like to bang younger women. You gotta go for the black and Spanish chicks. The white ones are too consumed with hypergamey at that age. White women are the most desired females in the world and they know it. The black and Spanish ones look around their neighborhood and they know you’re the better option. They’ll treat you better too.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Damn ok nice. Never even considered that

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

That’s a loser mentality. Assuming you’re white and stay in shape you can bang as many white 20 yr old girls you want past 40. No need to lower your standards

[–]beginner_2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Likewise, the majority of smoking hot 20-year-old women are not even going to entertain the idea of fucking a skinny fat beta more than twice their age

fixed that for you. If you lift, look strong and healthy women are shit at guessing your age. If they ask about it, it means they are already in doubt. Do you think women care how old Brad Pitt is?

[–]KidBrody77[S] 3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yes absolutely if they’re 20 years old they don’t want Brad Pitt. They want Channing Tatum. Jesus dude

[–]tyalanm0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This is nonsense

[–]cafeitalia5 points6 points  (3 children) | Copy

Dude, all you say is total bs. There are lots of 40-45 year old guys constantly pulling, plating 20-25 year olds. It is not that hard. As long as you are higher than them, they will have no problem constantly wanting please you.

[–]TheShearerComplex1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Yup move to Eastern Europe and a lot of 20-25 year olds only date 40 plus guys.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

This 100% im there can confirm

[–]robot3000_010 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

BB fast track

[–]ViolentInteger3 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy

All this word diarrhea to justify your thirst... AND you failed you answer my important question.

Good luck, dude. You're gonna need it...

[–]KidBrody77[S] 3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy

My mission is to grow my business by 20% this year, obtain a secondary revenue stream outside my business by year end, and hit the gym minimum 4 days a week when it reopens.

[–]BREWcoin8 points9 points  (2 children) | Copy

Good luck. It sounds like right now your mission is to convince internet strangers of who knows what. The people here don’t care what your mission is—they are just recommending that you have one. C’mon, trying to hang with a hookup two nights in row? Lesson learned.

[–]rockyp321 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Bro what is wrong with that I don’t understand he wanted to Fuck two night in a row he can put off his mission for a day or fucking work on both

[–]BREWcoin3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

This girl is on vacation and wants to have fun and not start dating a guy that’s two decades older. Whether this guy has other shit to do or not is irrelevant because he communicated that he doesn’t and he was needy. A woman knows she could sleep with a different guy every night of the week and they want to fuck guys that could sleep with a different girl every night of the week if they wanted to. This is all communicated covertly by how a guy prioritizes his time.

[–]superomar130 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

lmfao this is not solid advice, and the guy giving you the advice is probably half your age and jerks off over the sidebar

[–]CaiusBard3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Pretty much this. OP did everything right in person, but then somehow went full desperation mode after she left? Very strange. The night went well, he played his cards right, all he has to do is be distant enough and she'll guaranteed to come crawling back at some point.

[–]RanaMahal17 points18 points  (25 children) | Copy

I don’t wanna be a dick but man i’m 25 and even I’ve only been truly redpilled for a couple years and i have a business and like 5 plates spinning right now. wtf is OP doing with his life. why does some 20 year old broad matter so much. i bet she wasn’t even an 8 or 9 and his scarcity mentality made her prettier than she is.

fucking christ.

[–]pehsxten0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Good shit

[–]SICFJC0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

How does one bait her into kissing you goodbye?

[–]ViolentInteger4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

There isn't a set of simple steps to do this. It comes down to playing hard to get, hot & cold tactics, teasing, and leaving them wanting more.

Generally, you raise their interest levels massively, then you don't act on it. Drives them crazy causes them to pounce on you.

[–]jackandjill22-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

He's 40 it seems like he doesn't really have a grasp of the way dating works these days...

[–]ogpine032539 points40 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dude, just hit and run.

Congrats on fucking a prime piece of 20 year old property, but the fact that you did it in the first place as a 42 year old means you're not giving yourself enough credit as the player you are.

Just rinse and repeat with some other girl

[–]linkofinsanity1934 points35 points  (1 child) | Copy

Not every girl wants to become a plate. Not every girl wants to become your girlfriend. Some just want some dick and you were the one she was in the mood for.

If they don't pursue you after sex, they probably just wanted to get laid.

Going forward, what you can do better is remember to at maximum match her level of interest, especially post sex, if not less with the 2/3rds rule.

[–]Revere_Tha_MC10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

Gasp! That girl used OP for sex!

[–]mrrooftops24 points25 points  (1 child) | Copy

She expects you to act how she thinks a 42-year-old she looks up to should act. You're not acting that way and its the worst to her. Whether you like it or not, you did not fit into that expectation and, frankly, for a 20-year-old its disgusting that they had a superficial interest in a 42-year-old that hasn't got airtight mastery by that age. Also, 20-year-olds are fucking around, tourists in every situation they land in, they don't want to be tied down in any way so so any hint of desperation from someone your age - who they assume is going to want to get married and settle down within a second - is the freakiest shit that will make them run a mile and ghost you quicker than the high school nerd they led on as a joke.

[–]Unknockable1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Damn bruh aha

[–][deleted] 46 points47 points  (0 children) | Copy

Too needy you. Flaky 20 yr old. Move on.

[–]FinancialThanks122 points23 points  (8 children) | Copy

Charge it to the game. Maybe she didn’t enjoy the sex. Maybe she was just enjoying your attention over the phone and wasn’t interested in making you a regular. Maybe she realises that you’re 2 hours away and not worth her time

You shouldn’t have been free to see her 2 nights in a row. You should be spinning more plates

It comes off pretty needy that you’re hamstering about her not texting you the day after. She should be the one worried about making contact the day after

[–]dutchgguy24 points25 points  (0 children) | Copy

sounds she regretted having sex with him

[–]KidBrody77[S] 6 points7 points  (5 children) | Copy

What's your advice on how to proceed from here? Just continue to go no contact with her? And in hindsight you're absolutely correct, inviting to spend the night again the next night was a total mistake. I have two other plates but they're 29 and 35 and they're both like 6's. Hard to order hamburger when you can potentially have filet mignon.

I get myself into this predicament all the time with HB8+ women. First of all there is no such thing as an HB8+ that is over 25 years old so when you are 42 years old like me unless you are Dan Bilzerian that is a tall fucking order to spin multiple plates all in their early 20s. I don't care how red pilled you are. You can get one here and there, but they're going to be very few and far between. So when I do manage to get one, I fall into a scarcity mindset because they are scarce for a guy my age. And once you've been with a chick that young, firm, tight, and wet it sure makes going back to that 35 year old or older woman damn depressing. I know logically I just have to treat her like I do any other plate. That's just a lot easier said than done.

[–]SeasonedRP23 points24 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't text her again.

[–]FinancialThanks14 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy

Well she’s not a prospect for regular sex since she’s 2 hours away. Best case scenario she becomes a person you hit up when you’re incidentally in her area or she’s in yours. Best way to do that is to move on with your life and hit her up if you’re ever in her area. I wouldn’t be too optimistic though

[–]KidBrody77[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Well the part I left out is she is a college student in a college that is located in my hometown. She's only back home for the summer. She moves back to my town in July.

[–]FinancialThanks10 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Do you live in your hometown?

[–]KidBrody77[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

What do you mean do I live in my hometown? Of course I do. Or were you asking if she lives in my hometown? She does during school. Right now she's back home 2 hours away.

[–]Current_Copy0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I agree with you on this

[–]SimpleGuy11271 points72 points  (0 children) | Copy

DONT FUCKING TEXT HER BACK!!! WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU. YOU TOOK THE RED PILL BUT YOU HAVENT LEARNED SHIT ABOUT FEMALE NATURE!!!!

listen clear and listen fucking good bro. She is 20. Do not text her back. You are crossing the line. DO YOU WANT TO HER TO THINK YOUR HER FATHER?!? Let the chick be and don’t be desperate. They come and go bro you will have another one I promise. YOU DID NOTHING WRONG THAT NIGHT. THATS JUST HOW YOUNG GIRLS ARE. You might of sealed your fucking fate with having sex with her again because you damn near stalked her. Don’t do anything and go on about your life, if she hits you back up then you should INSTANTLY KNOW SHE WANTS TO FUCK YOU AGAIN! YOU HAVE YOUR OWN CRIB SO THATS WHAT YOUNG GIRLS REALLY LOVE! If she goes and fucks other guys so be it.

It only matters when it’s your turn. That’s the cold hard truth brother and I’m sorry for going on your ass but you can’t do that. If you want to know more on wtf to do join my discord,I am willing to help you and other dudes out on this shit. Https://discord.gg/zDbhGAQ

[–]trwawyrnd18 points19 points  (0 children) | Copy

A few hours after she left I texted her

rookie mistake bro 😂

[–]boy_named_su14 points15 points  (2 children) | Copy

  1. you hit her up too quickly
  2. read Sex God Method

[–]1v1rustfaggot690 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Is that a book?

[–]boy_named_su4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

it is. you can usually find it online...

[–]MakaleaIsMyDogsName14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy

She’s 20 enough said they have the attention span of an ant. Don’t take it personal she’s having more fun playing with her Snapchat filters even if the sex was good.

[–]Senior Endorseddr_warlock13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy

So finally at 9pm I texted her "Are you ok? You've been pretty quiet today?"

Fucked up man. She could be distant for a myriad of reasons, doesn't matter. Never ask why. Requesting that she explain why she's not showering you with attention is validation seeking behavior. Just go silent and let her come back.

[–]1Terminal-Psychosis10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

She used you for sex and is done with ya.

You were a fling. No biggie. Enjoy the memory.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your 42 I’m 19 I hate to sound condescending but there’s got to be a point in your life where this shit is meaningless when it comes to women,

Find another 20 year old like you did before and move on

[–]Livecrazyjoe9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

She was drinking all weekend and horny. So you guys fucked. She got what she wanted and went on her own way. No big deal. It happens to everyone. Ive done it to women and they've done it to me.

Dont overthink it.

[–]freeagent10816 points17 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your just a hookup. Let it go

[–]antioch947 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

You expected too much. What do you think a 20 year old girl who sends you nudes within a few days will be like? She only thinks about her own well being and fun. Youre only useful for her as long as she feels like it.

She has clearly other opportunities. Dont value her that much because shes also not doing that. You had your fun and thats it.

[–]agjrpsl8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

I wouldn't worry about it dude. I'm in my later 40's in Florida and the chics here are just dtf. Some are recurring plates, and some are ons. They usually come begging for it. I don't bother texting or communicating much with them unless they text me or something was planned. This chic just wanted to get laid and you were available. That's all unfortunately. When she's in the area and she's horny she'll contact you. Stay pumped mate.

[–]Senior EndorsedVasiliyZaitzev8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

This particular thing was going to have a beginning, middle, and an end. Easy come, easy go. You likely came off as a little too desperate or something.

Verdict: less cling, more fling.

[–]SteveSan826 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

She just wanted to get fucked or a place to sleep. She's now on to the next guy.

I'm surprised she even met up with you after all that pussy drying texting and bikini pics she sent to 50 other guys

[–]Onefamiliar6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Honestly you forgot that women aren't yours. It was just your turn, you'll be on top again in no time

[–]scottandcoke5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you want an explanation for her behaviour it's this:

She was horny and made a decision with her horny brain. In the morning she sobered up and was thinking with her rational brain. She's probably thinking what she did is taboo/wrong and wanted to distance herself from the act. All you needed to do was back off until she was horny again. If the sex was good she'll come back around.

[–]downvotesanimals9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

You sound like you have oneitis. No wonder she pumped-and-dumped your needy ass.

[–]alex_de_tampa5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you miss one bus catch the next one.

[–]LegendarySuperSalsa3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Dude, you are 42 and had sex with a 20 year old girl. Bro no matter how badly you might have fucked it up you still won in a way.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Hahahaha....winner of best comment of the thread lol

[–]send_it_for_the_boys4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

You did everything great untilll you fucked her and caught oneitis for a 20 year old slut....come on man.....after she left you should had went on with your day and did something fun or productive and not said a word to her I guarantee you she would have been the one double messaging you.. but you were acting like the girl, you might had been in the clear then you sent that 9 pm text...and whatever frame and normalcy you had left...you threw it away..but you got the lay good for you take the win, reflect where you fucked up. next this one and keep going and don’t ever do that again.

PS how about you try to figure out why a girl who was shitting in diapers and drawing unicorns on the walls, when you were running around in bars as a young man literally partying like it was 1999 has so much control over your emotional state.

[–]twxxx1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

PS how about you try to figure out why a girl who was shitting in diapers and drawing unicorns on the walls, when you were running around in bars as a young man literally partying like it was 1999 has so much control over your emotional state.

LOL. love this

[–]strongerthandeath979 points10 points  (1 child) | Copy

She is guilty.Thats what you risk for every time,when you have sex with her by building attraction,without building comfort,getting to know each other and building connection,between two of you.Do you want one night of sex or a lot wild nights?

[–]KidBrody77[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah for sure. It was all attraction building zero comfort. Mistake.

[–]1InformalCriticism3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

She wanted sex, you made her comfortable enough to give it to you.

What more do you want? If you're trying to plate her, my guess is she's looking for more than dick - she can get that anywhere.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Come on bro. Back to the basics.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah I know man. She pulled back after sex to see if I would chase and I didn't disappoint. Fucking dumb. She's by far the best piece of ass I've had in the last two years and I let it override my outcome independence. Pretty straightforward.

[–]shyrix2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

U redpilling. This is par for the course. Next. Tons of young women into older men. Great time to be 40

[–]lolomotif122 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You certainly came across too needy and desperate by the looks of it. I smell zero abundance in your mentality, you certainly saw her as the prize and not yourself and she felt that. Don't message her AT ALL ever again and she might, just might hit you up, but I doubt it.

[–]NightTerror62 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

She was testing you, and you failed. She gave you the cold shoulder in the beginning to make sure you weren’t desperate, etc, and you made yourself look desperate. You probably aren’t getting her back, but definitely don’t say another word to her until she does.

[–]W_O_M_B_A_T2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

This is going to be long. I'm not going to pull any punches here.

We quickly developed a strong rapport and she was soon texting me and snapping me selfies all the time. This went on everyday all last week. At first they were quite innocent but gradually became sexier and sexier.

This wasn't here first game by a Longshot. Smooth operator detected.

She agrees and comes over about midnight.

All good so far.

She did the required "Ok but I'm not going to have sex with you" every female does which I just said that's fine.

Bit of a weak response, but whatever. Could do worse.

When these bitches act like they're the hottest shit since plutonium, never treat them like they're any kind of remotely hot shit.

"You're saying you're thinking about fucking me. Stop perving, FFS I just wanted a beer and some company."

The other option is to ignore this shit test completely.

Basically as soon as she gets there we start making out.

I think your push-pull game wasn't strong here.

You're not getting her to do things to qualify herself to you first. Nobody enjoys a competition where other people act like you being the champion and getting the prize is a foregone conclusion. What's the challenge in that?

Eventually all of our clothes are off except her thong. When I go to take that off she gives me a soft no.

She's getting bored and uncertain about your level of leadership, dominance, and abundance, because you're charging in, firing all cylinders. There's no polarity.

She suspects you might be basic. She suspects other women don't want to fuck you, which is why you're treating her like she's the best shit and following her around, instead of making her work harder for it.

But whatever, she's still horny, she came out here, and you look/smell OK physically, you're not a complete trainwreck so what the hell.

I just said ok lets go to bed then.

Improve how you deal with Last Minute Resistance. You need to freeze her out and go do something else for a bit.

Suggestion- just grin without a word, head out to the kitchen, grab another drink. Then sit down on the couch and say, "do a dance for me."

We start spooning to go to sleep and a while later she's backing up on me and ends up taking her underwear off herself and we have sex in basically every position imaginable.

Read "The Sex God Method" by Daniel Rose, if you haven't already.

Women want you to make them submit themselves to you mentally and emotionally. Nobody cares about what positions you're in.

I'm not seeing a lot of the former going on from your description, here.

You think it was great because you're personally getting your own fantasy fulfilled and your ego stroked just by the fact that you're boning a much younger, hotter woman than you're used to. So you just kind of acted like a kid at a fireworks show, not like the guy running the show.

I think she put on a brave show for you because most women have serious neuroses about a man not orgasming or losing his erection, once they agree to have sex. Why? I think that's because historically it's not completely unknown for guys to toss them off the bed, go apeshit, and kick the shit out of them in response to losing it. So they haven't forgotten a million years of evolutionary history.

But this doesn't mean she was having a great time at this point.

The next morning she gets up and leaves. I kiss her goodbye.

Acted a bit needy instead of playfully getting her to qualify herself more before she left. Train's going downhill pretty fast at this point. You're starting to get anxious about rejection, instead of saying, well that was fun, don't let the door hit you on the way out. Maybe call you again if I remember.

Life is good.

In hindsight it seems it definitely wasn't and she was eager to just grab her shit and GTFO at that point.

This is like you fucking a woman on a first date who turns out to be 10 years older and 20kg heavier than her photos and selfies she sent. Also has a whiny attitude and is fairly stupid. Yeah sure you'll bone if you have nothing better to do that night and you're horny enough. Then she tells you once you're both naked that she doesn't like blowjobs. You're not going to consider it your proudest moment. Definitely not going to ask for a second meeting if you have any self-respect as a man.

Here's where things go sideways.

Probably went sideways earlier that night when you didn't make her do things to earn your respect and affections, and your push-pull wasn't on point. Just my personal theory.

A few hours after she left I texted her and asked her if she was going back home or staying in town another night.

This was fairly bland, nonspecific, and lacked leadership. You're trying to fit yourself into her plans, not demanding she work around your busy schedule like a high value man. "Read, I'm boring and I planned nothing this entire weekend, on the off chance that you might come over to see me a second time."

I was going to try to hook up a second date. She simply replied with a short "IDK yet".

At this point, anything she says that's less than: "you want me to jump? OK how high?" should be construed as "hard pass."

The response to an I.O.D. like this is to message one of your other plates, or go do something to further your mission. Then hit her up a couple weeks later.

Acting like IODs are something that is at all worth investing attention in or pursuing, will only earn you a landslide of additional disinterest.

I said ok well if you stay in town you should come stay with me again

This is you treating her like the prize, chasing, after she had already given you a strong IOD which you seemed to completely not process at that point. You knew the words but you didn't understand the contextual language.

This shows aside from being ignorant of the situation you have a lack of other options besides her.

This is breaking one of the most basic TRP rules which is you should never be afraid to lose a woman, or at the very least never be afraid to disregard her for a few weeks and approach multiple others.

to which she replied "Probably not. I'll probably just stay with fuck my friend if I do". Because he's not needy.

Fixed that.

You made her spell it out for you in 1st grade English.

So now I'm like WTF

You've been a bit slow on the pickup since last night. See: kid at a fireworks show, afraid it's going to end soon.

The entire day she doesn't send me a single text or snap..the first day since I started talking to her she hasn't done so.

Oh my! You poor, lonely little boy. Whatever shall you do?

Something more productive than mentally masturbating about any single given woman's lack of interest, that's what.

So finally at 9pm I texted her "Are you ok? You've been pretty quiet today?"

You went full-retard needy.

Never go full-retard.

to which she responded with a simple "Yep" and that's all. I responded to that with "Are you sure? You seem pissed." to which she never replied.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

This response was fucking epic. Can’t deny that. Putting on a red pill clinic here. But we both can’t deny it’s much more easier to take your time and analyze everything in hindsight. In the moment as you’re going with the flow it’s so much more difficult. But yeah I can’t argue with anything you’ve said here. It’s all 100% on point

[–]Greaterbird2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Fucks her one time and he's talking to her like they're a couple having an argument

[–]twxxx2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

As others have mentioned. After she left, everything you did was wrong. I want to expand a bit on the why

| Here's where things go sideways. A few hours after she left I texted her and asked her if she was going back home or staying in town another night.

Young girls especially normally aren't looking for anything serious (right away). As someone else mentioned "She wanted a taboo age-difference fling with a hot daddy, not a clingy beta old dude creeping her out". By texting so soon it's 1.) super super clingy and 2.) shows you do not have abundance or a life. Now I and most everyone have had some successes scheduling a followup so quickly, but normally you want it to at least be the girls idea.

| She simply replied with a short "IDK yet". I said ok well if you stay in town you should come stay with me again to which she replied "Probably not. I'll probably just stay with my friend if I do".

the "idk yet" should have a been a clear text bro! Girls only say hell yes and no. You shouldn't have texted anything after that, maybe a "ight take care hmu". Instead you laid some more clinginess on her "you should stay with me again".

| So now I'm like WTF but I just let it go and didn't text her the rest of the day. The entire day she doesn't send me a single text or snap...the first day since I started talking to her she hasn't done so. So finally at 9pm I texted her "Are you ok? You've been pretty quiet today?" to which she responded with a simple "Yep" and that's all. I responded to that with "Are you sure? You seem pissed." to which she never replied.

BROOOOOOO. The medium is the message, you should know this. You need to brush up on your game and redpill concepts. She wasn't texting you because she had lost attraction (or thats what you should assume because otherwise it's not your business anyways). A text like "Are you ok" shows that you noticed and are thinking about her all day - it's even extra extra clingy! "Are you sure? You seem pissed." is just pure beta talk. COMMUNICATION IS BETA.

Also it can be normal for a girl to pull back after sex, to see if you will chase and be needy. It's almost a shit test of sort.

Never act on your negative emotions like this (even if you were worried about the consent - that's worry a negative emotion). The minute you started feeling that urge to text and why isn't she texting, thats when you know you need to be extra careful and pull back because your frame is broke.

TBH you probably could have salvaged it if you just didn't text after she said "idk yet". But the "Are you ok" and "you seem pissed" are probably beyond recovery. Being 20 I really doubt she'll ever be back but it's possible. Incredibly unattractive and she probably thinks you're a creeper now. Take the win and learn.

[–]yourgirlfriendsdad2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Way to fuckin go man! Nice notch

[–]ovrload2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

She’s fucking younger better looking chads. Move on

[–]acidwife2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

"She was obviously drinking" "She came over at midnight". You took advantage of her when she was intoxicated and she regrets it and blames you for it. DUH. Its obvious.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Took advantage of her while she was intoxicated? LOL! How very feminist of you. Do you work for Code Pink? Guess you didn't read the part where she was texting me multiple nudes and explicit close ups of her pussy ALL DAY before she came over. It never ceases to amaze me how women absolutely refuse to take any responsibility or accountability for their actions and how society fully supports and enable this lack of female agency.

[–]acidwife0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You said it yourself... she was intoxicated.

[–]IXseed2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

A few hours after she left I texted her

This is where you fucked up. You got pussy whipped. The one thing a bitch hates is when she give a dude some pussy and he goes blowing up her phone up afterwards. Even though she's 20 she can just feel the thirst vibes and had to drop you like a bad habit.

Let the pussy for a week. Wait a min and let her reach out back to you.

[–]superomar133 points4 points  (7 children) | Copy

Some pretty nooby responses in the comments lol. Here is the real answer to your question:

  1. In a bunch of ways she could be feeling weird about the age difference after the act. Give her space, let her figure it out, don't text sappy shit ( or at all) in the meantime. Just be empathetic lol. It's possible your value to her was just as a one night stand lover, and she got that and she's done.
  2. It could be that the sex sucked. If it did, that's your fault, get better.
  3. It could be that maybe you were just too sappy and boyfriendy afterwards and that fucked with her expectations and made her cold towards you.
  4. Maybe you acted too differently after sex from who you were before sex. This freaks girls out and makes them think you just put on an act and weren't genuine.

Lol we're human and we fuck up, but as long as you own it and don't come from a frame of insecurity, you're fine, since you've already stuck it in. Redpill can sometimes be too perfectionist and the game changes a bit after the lay.

NEXT TIME, act exactly the same as before sex, just a little bit warmer. No need to be super affectionate afterwards man, it was the first lay. When she leaves your place, text a few hours after or the next day: "had a great time ;) Hope you're not too sore, speak soon"

There's three things girls are thinking of when they have sex with a guy:

  1. The type of value you present. Are you a boyfriend candidate? are you a one night stand? Are you a lover she wants to see over and over? Are you someone she's going to cheat on her boyfriend with? etc
  2. What the experience you shared with her was like. Needless to say, if she was drunk and it happened, much lower chance of seeing her again unless you really blew her away. If you created some sort of emotional connection, higher chance.
  3. What she's looking for/ what's her situation?

Some of these things are in your control, some are not.

I've always had the most luck of girls not flaking after we fuck when these criteria are met:

  1. Building an emotional connection with her
  2. Not drinking alcohol (or limiting alcohol consumption)
  3. Spending time together after intimacy
  4. Going multiple rounds together
  5. Not waiting too long to contact her after

Happens to all guys, don't be too hard on yourself mate. And don't listen to these try hard comments saying it was all your fault and that you were a needy beta lmao. Maybe some of it was your fault, maybe it wasn't. All you can do is analyze and learn how to handle the situation better for when the next chick comes around.

You got this mate

EDIT: But I do agree with the solution lol. Don't text her again. Maybe she'll reach out to you, maybe she won't. You've fucked it up. Best chance to save it is not text her for a few months and then reach out of the blue (if she doesn't do it first) with something like, "hey I just got back in town, how are things?"

[–]KidBrody77[S] 1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy

This is good advice. I appreciate. Honestly what freaked me out the most about her going no contact the next day was the "Ok I'll come over but I'm not having sex with you" and the soft no I got when I went to take her panties off. I got to hamstering about maybe she feels like I pressured her into doing something she didn't want to do and my curiosity and worry about that overrode my red pillness. I just wanted to see what she was going to say for my own sanity

[–]superomar137 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy

Those are incredibly stupid things to be worried about and you're coming from the wrong frame of mind. I can tell you were a bit soft. You're naturally more empathetic and caring it seems, and that's ok. But you've gotta learn to turn that empathy on and off like a dimmer switch.

You also need to realize "ok I'll come over but I'm not having sex with you" is literally the oldest flirting tactic girls have in their book. In fact it's so old, i've used that one myself on girls tons of times and it's really fun (said with a sexy smirk of course). What she's basically saying is "hey I'm going to say this and I hope you don't take it literally because if you do then I'll be disappointed and know you're a shmuck. But I need to say this to rationalize in my head that I'm not a slut for sleeping with you, and I hope you as a man turn it in to something fun." Honestly my favorite response to that is "as long as you promise to keep your hands to yourself". And then when she comes over, i take her hand and put it on my chest and say "quit breaking your own rules" LMAO.

The soft no when you went to take her panties off was natural resistance. About half the girls you'll sleep with have this what I like to call "final destination" resistance. Sometimes it's the panties. Sometimes it's the bra. Sometimes it's literally just the shirt. Whatever it is, once it comes off, everything comes off easily afterwards. You handled the resistance perfectly. You laid off, it let her know that you're not gonna be pushy and you're just there to have fun and that she can leave at any time. Then you went for the escalation again. That was a great move.

Neither one of those should worry you lol

What worries me is how much you're thinking you fucked up. Obvious scarcity with you. Your frame should not be of how do i get her back but rather how do I learn from this so I don't fuck up with the next one. Don't text her again unless she reaches out to you first. Don't apologize for anything either. Just play it cool, and be warm. If she doesn't reach out, text her in a few months with just a quick "hey ___ just got back in town, hope you're well, how are things? "

[–]KidBrody77[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Man this post made me feel so much better. Thank you. It was just what I needed to hear

[–]superomar131 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

One thing I do want to add on, you really fucked up with the texting man. "are you pissed?" "are you ok?" LOL come on man. You're a fucking 42 year old guy, you should be well accomplished and have a mission. Focus on your business that you're trying to take off the ground. That's the entire frame for your interaction, you're busy. You're not worried about her feelings, she doesn't have cancer and she's not dying of corona. You haven't been dating for a year. You don't owe her shit lol. Man up!!!

Move on to the next bitch.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

I get that but at the same time we are living in the #MeToo era. I have multiple successful businesses. I have much to lose. She kept saying “I’m not a gold digger” which concerned me. Honestly she could come to me with an accusation unless I give her X amount of money and I’d probably do it. Maybe she’s smart enough to know that. Who knows.

[–]superomar130 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

[–]KidBrody77[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you

[–]2319Skew3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

OP should show up to her place with a wedding ring

[–]drqxx1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

NEXT!

[–]GearaltofRivia1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Wtf? You’re 42 and you banged a 20 yo and are wondering what happened? I thought TRM was essential read here

[–]Hubertos941 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You are her plate, that's all.

[–]Domebeers1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

The sex may not have been good, idk I wasn't there. But that notwithstanding, I think you went wrong by texting her. Or you shouldn't have texted her what you texted her at least.

You should have went no contact until she contacted you. Or if you had to contact her you should have sent the rape insurance text (hey had a great time last night) and left it at that until she was texting you again.

It sounds silly but a lot of girls don't want to feel they got a boyfriend after sleeping with a guy one time. You almost have to go more distant until you've fucked her 3 or 4 times, and even then I'd be hesitant about overdoing the communication.

[–]Gtrplyr38381 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Keep it moving. She’s 20. Nothing more needs to be said.

[–]AncientDragons1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

She was drunk and she regrets it. Probably has another guy lined up. Best case.

Worst case- she regrets it and thinks you date raped her. I’d stay out of contact.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

You hit the nail on the head. When she went no contact the next day I started hamstering about "worst case" scenario which drove me to reach out to her to see what she would say.

If I had a dollar for every girl that said "Ok I'll come over but we're not having sex" where we ended up having enthusiastic sex I could retire. They want to bang every bit as much as you do but its like they feel obligated to say that so that you don't think they're a slut...or they themselves can tell themselves they're not a slut since they didn't go over to your place with the "intention" of having sex. I don't know. I just know plenty of women say that and then turn around and fuck you like a porn star.

She did give me a second soft no when I went to take the underwear off which was "nooooo we're gonna leave these on" while giggling and laughing which I was just like ok lets go to bed then.

Then later in the night when we actually did up having sex neither one of us said anything to the other but she took her own panties off herself and then got on all fours without me prompting her to like she wanted to be fucked doggy which I did, she got on top of me and was going to town super fast riding me like crazy and moaning. It wasn't her was just laying there starfish sex.

But I also know who women's hamsters work and their total inability to take responsibility for any decision they make, especially if it's a decision they regret and they're young and immature. And if she told this story to any of her girlfriends they're only going to encourage that. I can hear her sorority girlfriends now...."Honey it's not your fault, you told him no twice". It genuinely terrifies the fuck of me. Maybe I'm overthinking it but when she went no contact the next day I felt an overwhelming need to find out where she stood on the night before.

[–]idevastate8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Do a follow-up post if you go to prison

[–]XanJamZ1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You’re 40 and fucked a HB8 20 something that’s great but you got desperate afterwards where you should have just coasted.

[–]Sonny_Luna1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Classic mistake. Hard to avoid sometimes. Obviously you came off as desperate and that didn't help. NBD really, though. You know what you did wrong so you know how to fix it.

Don't be too hard on yourself. Just try to improve.

[–]Wampyr4201 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You didn't do anything wrong. Women are fickle, 20 year old women are even more fickle. Move on with your life, if she feels like doing anything more then she will reach out. Strongly suggest you never contact her again.

[–]cumberger1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

lol i did that when i was 14

[–]KidBrody77[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Gotta love the guys here not Interested I’m helping but just tearing other men down. Insecure much?

[–]cumberger3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

if you want bitches stop using “_______ much?” i did that when i was 14 too. don’t be sensitive that’s why she doesn’t want you

[–]dunny7771 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Youre not red pilled at all, wtf

[–]cafeitalia1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Who cares? Are you committed to this girl? No! Why do you think she would be running back to you? If you are worried about and thinking this much over a 20 year old ghosting you, you haven't had much experience with them at all. Move on. Improve yourself more. And don't give a fuck.

[–]spartan_samurai1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You showed too much clinginess and neediness.

I will give you simple example:

Suppose a girl wanted to try a new restaurant. She enjoyed her lunch at this new restaurant and the manager keep sending her messages as soon as she left the place: Please come back for dinner, for tomorrow's breakfast and also for lunch.

Do you really think she is gonna be bothered to come back again after you showed scarcity mentality ?

[–]2ComplexProjection1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I don't agree with other saying that it is your poor management of the next day that crashed this relationship. According to your story, she was already distant in the morning after sex.

Sooo... You might want to consider you are bad in bed.

[–]Chalphamale1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

That's extreme neediness behavior and for what? You won the chase and she's obviously not LTR material why are you so worried about her coming back again? It sounds like you still have some deep-seeded BP tendencies possibly like loneliness. I've NEVER initiated contact out to a plate the same day after she left. Like literally, wtf?.

Like others have said, the neediness gets amplified because of the age gap. Now you just look like a creepy old guy

[–]Casanova-Quinn1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Contrary to what some are saying, texting afterwards for logistics regarding a second meetup is alright. However, you handled the whole thing wrong. It should have been this simple:

You: Hey that was fun last night. You headed home today?

Her: IDK yet

You: Ok

That's it. Nothing more. Sit back and relax. She'll let you know if she wants to meet again. And if she doesn't, it's cool, onto the next one.

In contrast, you went from "thirsty" about meeting up, to "butthurt" because she rejected you, to "nice guy" when you asked if she's pissed. You basically snapped and ran the gauntlet of typical beta behavior. That's your problem.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Agreed. That's the dangerous thing about allowing oneself to slip into beta behavior. Once you've made one beta slip up it starts a chain reaction of subsequent beta behaviors that can be very hard to reverse.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

***UPDATE*** She texted me this last night.....

"Sorry I didn't respond to your last text. I got to thinking about it and I like you but you're literally as old as my Dad. I'm just not comfortable with that."

I just told her that's cool I understand and wished her the best of luck. I'm leaving with some great nudes and great memories. I'll call it a win.

[–]Unknockable2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

So painful to read.

Never ever be persistent like that over a girl again. You shouldn’t of even hit her up after she gave you the goods.

[–]mysterjared2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You didn’t lay the pipe right, homie.

[–]idevastate3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

You never text her the next day. Ever. EVER. That's feminine shit. Be in your masculine. You don't hear from her, you send a ping msg about 4-5 days later. You don't hear back then, you wait a week or so. You don't hear then, NEXT. Stop talking women out of liking you, let them miss you and wonder about you.

All women, no matter how much they like you, will stop contact at some point. Girl may have been the one initiating and texting first, sending nudes, then silence. It's a test. This is how they filter the men from the beta creeps that are just faking it. They all have pasts with some clingy guy they never want to run into again.

[–]zephenrage0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy

What does HBxmean?

[–]strengthenics2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

HB means Hot babe, the number afterward is a rating out of 10.

[–]DomoSmoove1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Yeah i been confusee about this as well. So is a HB1 still a hot babe? Sorry if this come across as a dumb question. I dont understand the difference between HB8 & SMV8

[–]strengthenics2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

No worries, im not an expert on this but ive been following this sub long enough to think I know what im talking about so here's my best interpretation: A HB rating is just a rating from 1-10 and the HB doesnt necessarily mean the chick is a hot babe its just the name of the rating scale. And I've never seen someone give a rating to a SMV but a HB rating is based purely on looks, while a Sexual market value is based on many things including looks, social status, financial status and more. I'm not sure if there's a rating for SMV, I've just seen it referred to as High SMV and low SMV and somewhere in the middle if your working on your way up. Hope that helps.

[–]DomoSmoove0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Oh ok thanks for clearing that up. HB seems to be for females while SMV is for guys

[–]strengthenics0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Not necessarily. I Think sexual market value applies to both men and women. For example a divorced woman in her 30s who is a HB8 but has kids and a dead end job has a low SMV, meanwhile a 21 year old HB8 with no kids and can chose any guy she wants has high Sexual market value.

[–]zephenrage0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you very much for answering that for me. 🤝

[–]goldenpoopstain0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Read the sidebar

[–]Kabuki4310 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

18 to 22 like dicks in rotation. They are more rp in that sense (don't put dick on pedestal etc) so move on

[–]shubeets0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Objectively your frame broke In paragraph 1

[–]Raizzen0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I think I’m kinda like you in a lot of ways OP. Let it go. And why tf are you blowing up on these strangers on the internet ? Their advices might not be what you wanna hear but definitely ones you need. I know I’m speaking from the outside looking in, heck, I might even be reacting the same way you are right now.

That’s why I’m telling you this as a 36-year old, half way red pilled, own your mistakes. Let it go. And thank God for our redpilled brethrens.

[–]Millstone500 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Don't be a bitch. Cut her loose; she's giving clear signals.

[–]DOJITZ2DOJITZ0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

She red pilled you.

[–]solstone1090 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

What needed to be said has been said. You messed up man. Don't be so needy

[–]z2a1-90 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Keep slaying awalt

[–]axiscontra0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Lmfao I love that No dance they always do. Devious creatures.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Another true alpha right here.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy

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[–]axiscontra0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I was saying women are devious in their own right. I don't completely agree with the premise of what you're saying. Women just want to maintain control but they also enjoy the feeling they get when they can't say no even though they are trying too. They are backward creatures.

Also if a women is ass naked with you in the bed and saying "no" she already past the safety stages, and the shit testing. Eg. Women complain when I constantly ask them for consent. "I just want it to happen naturally". Women, deal with them at your own risk not for the beta or the faint hearted lol.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

True red pill guy. Can celebrate another man’s success

[–]Lostfate090 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

"Are you ok? You've been pretty quiet today?" That's a boyfriend text, Don't chase her. You fucked a hot 20 year old, good job, stop texting her let her chase you.

[–]robot3000_010 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Haha you got span in some girls harem. Are you realising that TRPs "men are the gateholders of commitment" is a crock of shit and women like to rotate multiple cocks?

😂

[–]Peacheslikeyou0 points1 point  (16 children) | Copy

42 with a 20 year old? You're old enough to be her dad wtf.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 0 points1 point  (13 children) | Copy

LOL....and your point is? Women are at the peak of their physical attractiveness between the ages of 18 and 25. It's all downhill after that. Sorry, I don't make the rules.

[–]Peacheslikeyou0 points1 point  (11 children) | Copy

So are men buddy, no wonder she ghosted you 😂

[–][deleted]  (7 children) | Copy

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[–]Peacheslikeyou0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy

besides he can get another

A gold digger who will use him for money and toss aside? lmfao you boomer men are something else. She admitted she broke up with him because he's a fossil.

This man will be a drooling cripple by the time he has kids and yet you will still insist, 'men peak in their 40's thooooough' lmao give me a break.

[–][deleted]  (5 children) | Copy

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[–]Peacheslikeyou0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

try gen X

LOL ok boomer.

Millennial? Try Gen Z lol, I don't brag about having a high notch count and casual sex is disgusting.

Only difference is sweetie what works for us men doesnt for you.

'it's ok when we do it REEEEEE!' Except it isn't though, no one wants your blister covered penis, men who sleep around are disgusting and no low n count women would seriously consider them for marriage.

Have funny in your lonely leftist feminist misery, you'll be middle aged dating down soon enough.

I'm gen z and in a serious relationship you crusty dusty boomer, and I'm not left wing, god can you even respond to me rather than a character you've created and placed upon me?

[–][deleted]  (3 children) | Copy

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[–]Peacheslikeyou0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Calling me boomer doesnt make me a boomer and 25 is very much a millenial.

I'm not 25 yet but ok. I'm Gen Z you idiot.

Women date men with experience, men view women with high notch counts as low value. You e got 5 years or 1 kid before your dating value diminishes. Just remember one thing, men age women get old.

No, we date men we like, women don't like manwhores either. Men certainly do age sweetheart, no woman likes balding, fat, low T wrinklebags.

Young Leo DiCaprio is gorgeous, old Leo DiCaprio is ugly af, oh the comforting lies you fossils tell yourselves to make the crushing loneliness not hurt as bad lol 'Made age like wine right? It's not over, right?' 😢

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy

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[–]KidBrody77[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Not true. Matthew Mcconaughey was 45 years old when he starred in the lead role of the male stripper movie Magic Mike. Good luck making a stripper movie where the star is a 45 year old female stripper.

But even assuming men are at the peak of their physical attractiveness between the ages of 18 and 25 it wouldn't matter because unlike men, physical attractiveness is not the primary driver of attraction for women. It doesn't rank nearly as highly as wealth, success, and power. A 24 year old hot woman can work as cashier in a grocery store and still easily land a millionaire if she's hot enough. Under no circumstances is a 24 year old man working as a bag boy in a grocery store going to land a super model no matter how hot he is.

I'm sorry but the fact is women have a very narrow window of opportunity between the ages of 18 and 25 to secure the highest value man they possibly can. Unfortunately, all too many women piss away these years partying and sleeping around waiting for the bigger better deal falsely thinking men are going to always want them like this and they wake up one day in their 30's and single, or worse yet a single mom, and realize no high quality men are interested in them anymore and they're going to have to be alone or settle. It's sad actually.

[–]Peacheslikeyou0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

45 years old when he starred in the lead role of the male stripper movie Magic Mike.

.....a film? this is your example? lmfao. Monica Belluci was 40 when she played the most beautiful queen of all in Brothers Grimm, but alright.

physical attractiveness is not the primary driver of attraction for women.

Wrong, just wrong. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EFnJMPQow7A

Under no circumstances is a 24 year old man working as a bag boy in a grocery store going to land a super model no matter how hot he is.

Haven't heard of Jeremy Meeks then I guess?

This idea that women have to 'hurry up' and find a man in their first few years of adulthood is just another way TRP men try to manipulate women. Women don't magically become ugly at age 25, and it's hilarious how many old men try to flirt with me in bars because they believe the lie that 'muh wimmin like older men with status'. Like no grandpa, go home lmfao.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I never said women become instantly ugly at 25. It's a curve. There's exceptions to every rule but typically most women are at the PEAK of their physical attractiveness and fertility (the primary driver of male attraction) during those years. After 25, their physical attractiveness slowly starts to decline. Be honest, are you more physically attractive now than you were at 21? Of course not. This is common sense.

This is basic proven human biology. You can't discount millions of years of human evolution because you don't like it. Men are hardwired to seek out youth and fertility in order to ensure our genes are passed on. Women are hardwired to seek out protection and provision to ensure the survival of her and her offspring. And I'm not just talking about caveman days. Up until the 19th century a woman's life, and the lives of her children, quite literally depended on the ability of the father to provide for them.

So no, sorry, women did not evolve to seek out "hot guys" and a man's physical attractiveness as their #1 top priority. Ask any woman you know and 90% of them will tell you that's not what is MOST important to them in a man. What's most important in a man to women is his ability to provide, lead and overcome challenges, strength, confidence, courage, fortitude, intelligence, etc. That's how evolution works. Over millions of years females that picked men to mate with without these traits didn't survive and were bred out of the gene pool long ago.

Whether you like it or not you are attracted to those traits I listed above far more than how "hot" the guy is. Sure having both is ideal but if you have to choose between a hot guy who can't provide for you or an average or even slightly ugly man who can, the vast majority of women will choose the latter every time.

As far as old guys hitting on you in bars....I would say if you're going to bars to find a quality mate you're going to be disappointed regardless of whether you're a man or woman and regardless of your age. I don't go to bars to pick up women. Anybody going to a bar looking to pick up, or be picked up, is going to be low quality.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I don't know why women, and it's only ever women that do this, always pull out the "You're old enough to be her Dad" card when an adult man dates a significantly younger ADULT woman. Who cares? We're both adults. Technically, I'm old enough to be a 30-year-old woman's dad. It's a silly and meaningless observation by generally older women to discourage men from dating more attractive younger women by quietly suggesting to do so must mean the man is a pedophile or into incest. It's ridiculous.

[–]Peacheslikeyou0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Nah it's just sad, creepy and weird. Just like the French president and his boomer wife. Older men who creep around bars like weird mosquitos, talking to the hottest 22 year old there like they actually have a chance while we all laugh at you. It's funny because male audacity truly has no bounds. Older men actually expect younger women, who can usually choose from any young guy she wants, to be with them instead.

[–]PM_ME_UR_NIPS_GURL0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You were just dick for her to ride on. She doesnt need you anymore.

[–]Wildercard0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Anonymize your cold approach and post it here, so we can learn from ya.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Hard to do without doxing myself or her but sent her a direct message on Facebook that went like this..... ME: You're single? HER: Yes ME: Well let's see if we can change that. I have a (then proceeded to list several things I have related to the college sport she competes in that I know she would be interested in) HER: Well see here's the problem I already have all of those things. ME: Hmmm...tough one here. Ok one thing I definitely know you don't have. HER: What's that? ME: A buff ass boyfriend (sent along with pic of me in a tank at the gym). Too bad you live 3 hrs away. HER: LOL..true I don't have that. But I'm just home for the summer. I'll be moving back to (my hometown) in July. ME: Great. Let's go out sometime when you get back. HER: Should have messaged me earlier. I was actually just in (my hometown) two days ago visiting a friend. ME: No shit? Oh well, next time for sure. HER: So what do you do in (my hometown)?

From here I just told her that I own multiple businesses and like to stay busy. I stayed vague on details which of course prompted more questions from her and just continued to draw her into my frame by remaining vague and indifferent. I would only give her enough information about myself to prompt her to ask more questions. Once you've got them asking a lot of questions you know you have them.

I will say that I did qualify myself early on by telling her the things I had that I know she would like, which prompted her to respond with a shit test (I already have all those things). That wasn't a mistake on my part. I wanted to prompt her to give me a shit test as quickly as possible so that I could show her that I could pass her shit tests and start to draw her into my frame. Shortly thereafter I disqualified her by telling her she lives too far away to which she immediately started qualifying herself and then I knew I had her.

That's not something I learned by something I came up with on my own that seems to work well. I'll disqualify myself or do something else to intentionally prompt her shit test me, pass her shit test, and then turn around and immediately disqualify her. I've been very successful building attraction with this method.

HER:

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Sounds like she regrets sleeping with you and will probably message when she's lonely or bored

[–]AboveAll20170 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Is this how sound like when I make desperate posts like this? God dam dude you screwed up. She honestly just wanted to fuck around, maybe if you were alpha and didn’t text her some needy shit like “are you sure you’re okay, you seem pissed” she would of stayed but god dam those texts were cringy to read, I could feel the desperate radiate through my screen into my eyes. Imagine being 42 and being this desperate

[–]W_O_M_B_A_T0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You sly dog, you.

Go get em.

[–]Soms6190 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Nothing wrong you did... My guess is she's in shock for fucking someone old to be her dad. Must be a good kid or something.

Nonetheless she a hoe.

[–]Conflicted11210 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Three years in? You don't seem to understand even basic concepts. Quit being needy, and read the sidebar

[–]Chadster113-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

It’s the age gap

[–]Greaterbird0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Girls with daddy issues love old guys, just not sad lonely needy ones

[–]seducter-1 points0 points  (4 children) | Copy

I know for me, I can’t stand fucking the same person two days in a row, and when chicks get super excited after fucking me and try to set up a follow up date for the next day, it turns me off. I’m thinking “shit , give me some space, I wanna do my own shit today.”

Even when friends hang out, I go radio silent for a while after hanging out, just cause that’s how I am. But sometimes they get pissy “wahh we had a great time yesterday why not hang out today!?!”

So somewhere in what you wrote I’m getting similar “needy” vibes.

Maybe give chicks a couple days before you reach out, but if you are really needy, then try having a bunch of plates so you can have someone to be with every single day.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Yeah, I think it's safe to assume she was going to ghost me regardless but I certainly didn't help anything inviting her to stay again the following night. In retrospect I can't believe I didn't see how that would come off needy. Really was a rookie mistake. Basically I had a clinic in everything you shouldn't do the day after sex with a super hot chick.

[–]seducter0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

It's all good though as you are aware of it now, and the root of al neediness is lack of abundance. I notice in another comment you compared her to some other plates of yours who are 6s. Maybe it's time to focus on getting more 20 yer old 8's and that should take care of the neediness.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Lol...yeah but dude that’s way easier said than done at my age.

[–]seducter0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Read up on a user name vasily, he’s older than you and not using age as an excuse. Not to sound like a dick

[–]paul_ernst-1 points0 points  (5 children) | Copy

First of all, congrats. There are a lot of people here in the comments talking shit but they all wish they were you.

I'm gonna go slightly against the current here of most posts. She's 20, which means sex is still something very precious and perhaps sometimes scary to her. She may look like a full grown woman but inside hides a very insecure teenager feeling a fraud in the big big world. Whatever she's going through right now (whether she's feeling regret or not), it's not your fault and you can't change it. It's her bubble. She may have had the night of her life and go back to her friends and feel like she did something she shouldn't have. I know it may be hard as these young hot girls might become more rare the older you become, but do everything you have to not to become emotionally invested.

Did you make a mistake asking her to stay over another night? Fuck no. Next time you run into such a girl she might as well be more confident on her escapades with older men and come right over. So as always: show intent but be free from outcome.

If I were in your place, my next move would be to to show strength, wisdom and kindness towards her youthful insecurities. She would love to fuck you again, but she needs to be sure you're not a creep who's gonna stalk her like her young insecurities tell her. Basically, don't accept ghosting as a way to end a conversation, and use it to show you're still on top by walking away (as in don't accept shitty behavior). I would text her something in the line of "Alright enjoy life little one". It's the best way for you and it's actually gonna allow you to fuck her again if she's around next time.No "hope to see you again", no "hit me up", no "i'll text you when I'm in the area" creepy bullshit.

[–]KidBrody77[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Agreed. Jealously and insecurity are easily the two biggest beta traits in the world. Therefore, I try to avoid them at all costs in all situations. If I hear about an average looking middle aged dude smashing a 20-year-old hottie I'm fucking happy for him. Even if he botched the post-close game. It means this shit works and if it works for him it can work for me.

I don't know if you saw my update but she did contact me and told me the age thing was just too much for her, which, come on, of course it is and we both knew that. It was obviously a college girl experimenting with her sexuality....she had a curiosity about fucking an older guy and she got that curiosity satisfied. Despite botching my post-close game it would have ended this way regardless so that makes me feel better. I got great memories, nudes, and a lesson learned out of it. Can't ask for much more than that.

[–]paul_ernst1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I just saw your update. Yep nothing much you could do. If you happen to talk to her in the future anyway, don't be afraid to flirt and tease her. Actually in general, if you're older, use it as a weapon. Once you're teasing a younger girl and she asks you your age say "too old for you". But I don't think you need a lot of advice. You're banging 20 year olds. Enjoy the good life stranger.

[–]throwitdownman1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

You think someone who sends nudes to a man (twenty+ years her senior) she only recently met is the type to think sex is precious? You’re a bigger hamster than OP was the day after he banged her.

[–]paul_ernst0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

ok baby x



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