LTR wants to go to BLM protest, I am strongly against. Thinking of breaking up with her if she goes. Am I overreacting?

Thanks for interesting info.

You misunderstood me. But I know what you mean. I totally acknowledge your struggle don't worry and it's really sad but it's beyond any of us it goes down to the root to the core nature of humans.Let me explain.

I will write long one in return lol.Here is how I look at it and why we view it differently. Is there a bias when it comes to just how you look? Absolutely. But I don't that's a race problem specifically. It's just one of countless things. And I don't think Blm can change that at all. It's beyond race it's something that is at core of humans.

And that is our subconscious reactions to look. It's not only human on human reactions and opinions. It's more than that. It even extends to animals. And it's undeniable.

And the problem is something that causes people like you to suffer is no one wants to acknowledge it or admit it.

But here are few out of countless examples. How do people perceive really short vs really tall man? Who they think is more successful in life and better to be friends with? Who is more likely to be popular and leave better first impression? How about face? Who are people going to suspect more if murder or rape of a child happened a really beautiful young guy or old balding man with crooked teeth and huge ugly eyes? Who will people have more confidence in all things equal. A small guy with weak and small frame or a tall guy with chiseled facial features ect. ect.

Here are even my personal experiences with that. All people in all of this are white just like me one is from what I saw and one is with me directly involved.

For example something similar to your experience. I was in training for a job. And there was this douche professor who no one liked and who gave lecture to huge number of us in large classroom. He felt like guy with a lot of confidence issues who always has to prove something to others and show his dominance.Later on we split in smaller groups and go to different smaller rooms to specalise in our jobs. And all people in my class are normal people mostly girls and some weak looking guys. I'm only one who is soild looking nothing special but special in this class and i have strong build. So when that aggressive asshole male professor entered who do you think he immediately started picking on? Me of course. Because he felt challenged by me even though I did nothing not even look at him. And he was so annoying that whole time he lessened enjoyment of the training for sure lol. He would constantly pick on me and require more from me than anyone else. It became a meme in class. He didn't concentrate on anyone else and he always wanted to show his dominance over me.

Or once when I was well dressed and at my best shape a girl I just met said to a friend that she could tell I was a good human being by the way I looked. Doesn't it sound same as skin color problem you face? Although it wasn't problem for me it's same it's a prejudice. And it isn't just about skin color it's just something similar to subgroup of larger thing and that larger thing no one wants to acknowledges is looks.

Here is second example something I saw even more brutal. Again all people are white except one which make this even more interesting because she wasn't a victim here. We were picking fruit in the summer. We had a team and all of us were average normal looking people with minor differences in size and strength. But there was this one guy with a face that is a textbook definition of criminal looking face. And I'm going to be honest I as well as everyone else in that group was cautious around him from the get go. No one was awere that it was because of looks except me (which is important when it comes to a point I'm trying to make) but that didn't stop me from judging him subconsciously even though I was fully aware of it that's how deep it goes. Later on I became good friends with him he even gifted me a hat. He was really nice quiet guy. Unfortunately he didn't have same luck when it came to others. Everyone absolutely hated him. They even started making conspiracies about how they saw things in home in different order then they left them and how he was the one doing all that stuff. People started hating him so much from the first day that they put bags on their doors where they slept so they could fall if he entered to kill them at night lol. It even became so bad that boss had to fire him and send him home. And all the people were white except one who was back. And when we were discussing our opinions of him while picking fruits in the field I said to them you shouldn't judge book by the cover cliche I know lol but true. And you know who said I agree despite judging him the whole time? Black women who no one was suspicious of. So looks even have stronger impact then just race. And after she agreed that we shouldn't judge book by the cover she continued to talk about how he must be horrible person lol. So even after I reminded her of that she immediately afterwards continued, it's that strong and it goes that deep down.

It's all about looks. And race is unfortunately part of something that is probably impossible to change unless generations pass,because it's subconscious.

And now some group like Blm comes along as says that they can change something that goes that deep down? By doing what breaking things and attacking random white people? With claims of systematic white oppression of balck people by the police and state? Is it possible to rebel like that against some I talked about? I personally don't think so.

Can that rebelling make black people feel less bad about being black and less like main characters so to speak (because they often mention that white characters are main characters in stories and attack that)? Maybe I don't personally believe it but I do consider it a possibility. But does it require these extreme measures? In my opinion definitely no. Should protests against police brutality be as brutal as they are? In my opinion definitely yes. But that's the thing I said so many times here. This should be about police brutality but priorities got totally shifted.

I saw a post that went viral about a girl saying that violence now is justified because slaves didn't sing some song and then got released. And I'm thinking what is she talking about? What is she even comparing slavery to now? What slavery is she talking about? And how are people gonna break free from that imaginary slavery by destroying things? Only slavery I see is slavery that all of us are going to be under. A slavery governed by the state and government. And that's what we all should fight against. That's when that video would make sense. And that's when all this violence on protests would make sense.

Now back to the question of can Blm and similar groups make black people feel like main characters and why I said I don't think so. It's because I don't think balding small guy with ugly face would ever feel like main character. It's because we deep down don't believe main characters in story of life look like that. We feel like spotlight is reserved for special beautiful people not for average or ugly, ugly will always feel like side characters. Now someone might say it can change through generations but I don't think that's true because it's in our genes it in our core nature in deepest part of us and I don't think it will ever change.

We can only make laws that forbid certain things when they must be forbidden (like murder, slavery, torture) but we can't erase truths of nature.

Like how women will always hate deformed guys and like more good looking guy.

I was always awere of looks. I always paid attention to how they shape our perception. That's why I think I see ugly truth many others don't see or don't want to acknowledge, but it's there.

This time I'm the one who is sorry for long post idk what got into me lol.