I experimented with a fat girl, and I regret it a lot. This whole thing was a huge slap in the face. I am truly lost.

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April 22, 2018

I’m a 20 year old guy. Ok so if you all have seen my post history, you would understand that I’m having a hard time with woman. Always have. Since middle school I’ve never had friends, so I don’t have a social circle. I’ve only dated one girl in my life. And I only got lucky because she slid into MY DMs. We dated for a while and we both agreed to a serious relationship. But sadly she dumped me after a couple months. We never had sex. My lack of dating experience made that dating experience doomed from the start. However, on the last few weeks of our dating run, we did get sexual. Made out, sucked on her tits, grab each other dick and pussy. Never went all the way though.

Anyways, she dumped, and I got really blue balled haha. Like I said, I’m not good with woman. I don’t have game, looks, confidence, none of that. I’m a loser. I don’t have friends. I’m ugly. All of it. I am trying to fix this. I’m on week 7 of lifting. Been reading lots of books. I meditate 10-15 minutes daily. Gave up the porn over a year ago. Don’t fap as much.

To get to the point of the post, I added this fat girl I thought was cute on FB. Now I always thought I was attracted to BBWs. So I slid in her DMs, got her number, and then asked her out. Again, I did this in desperation. I wanted to go out with someone again.

So I did. I picked her up at her house, went to go get some ice cream. Got to know each other. Then we went to the park and walked. Established kino. Put my arm around her, held her hand. By the end, we were making out on a bench. I was horny as fuck at this point. We then cruised around, and she asked me “know any hiding spots”. Told her I was actually home alone right now. So we went back to my place. I was so excited. Here I was a virgin, and I’m taking this girl back to my place at the first date. We got there, went to my room. She said she just wanted to cuddle, not fuck. We cuddled, made out, slapped on her ass, sucked her tits. She then asked me if I had condoms. I did. Still had the ones I planned on using on my ex.

We got naked, and we were going to have sex. Let me just say this right off the bat. It was UNBELIEVABLY crappy. I couldn’t penetrate her, either I was small, or her fupa/stomach was too big! Haha. I have no idea if we had sex or not.i didn’t feel anything. I’m not even sure if I’m a virgin or not anymore. Told her I couldn’t do it, she understood. Then she gave me a blowjob, first one ever. I came all over her face. And then took her home. It was a crappy experience. I can tell she watched too much porn. She was saying/doing cringey shit you see on porn. The way she gave handjobs was fucking fast and rough. Was hurting my foreskin. Haha man just thinking on it it’s actually kind of funny. After I came, I was looking at her fat body and I was thinking to myself “what the fuck is wrong with me. This is gross”.

Anyways, I took her out a couple days later, I was horney as fuck again. She was sending horny sexts. I picked her up at night, we went to a parking spot, went to the back, and cuddled. Same shit, sucked on her tits, kissed her while body, made out. She then gave me a BJ, and she swallowed my whole load. From here on out is when I was realizing how fucking pathetic I was being, and how desperate this shit was.

After I came, she was just rambling about her lift, and asking me all these questions. I was realizing that this chick was really fucking dramatic and psycho. She has lots of drama in her. Another thing I noticed was that she was agreeing with me with everything I said. And she was already acting clingy. Like if my phone would ring, she would ask “who is it??” in a sad jealous tone. If I was on my phone, she actually lean next to me just to look at my screen. She said she just wanted a fling, but told me she’ll only be loyal to me, and how she expects the same of me. Overall I was getting this creepy, psycho vibe from her. I was fucking disgusted. By her personality, but even more so with myself. Why was I doing this? This girl is so fat, I couldn’t penetrate her, and yet I took her out just so I can get a BJ and feel some sort of intimacy with a woman.

I dropped her off later. I dumped her the next day. I was really upset with myself. I really felt disgusted, so bad. I haven’t gotten a proper boner since that night, other than morning woods.

What I realized here was this : I can’t date ugly or fat girls. I know a lot you here say you can use fat or ugly girls to start of somewhere, but I really can’t. Not after this. I honestly feel like I disrespected myself, and I felt pathetic and still do.

It seems like I’m only going to be able to date 6s and above, like my ex. And that sucks, because I have a non existent SMV. I’m really ugly. I have no idea how I’m ever going to date a 6 or above again. I got lucky the first time. Not sure how I can do it again.... I’m really lost.

Post Information
Title I experimented with a fat girl, and I regret it a lot. This whole thing was a huge slap in the face. I am truly lost.
Author [deleted]
Upvotes 171
Comments 55
Date 22 April 2018 05:58 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/684
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/8e4xpw/i_experimented_with_a_fat_girl_and_i_regret_it_a/
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[–]locomotronn153 points154 points  (0 children) | Copy

Actually the self-awareness in this is impressive. You admited to yourself how you really feel, there is nothing wrong with that. No need to resist and make excuses up.

I actually admire you brother. I still have so much work to do on myself, it's scary. This makes me see it. Just keep at it. We'll get there

[–]stylesm1181 points82 points  (0 children) | Copy

You're a great story teller holy shit this was hilarious lmao. Stay on the path my friend, lift and grow strong. Hopefully you can hit us with a good field report after you've made some dank progress

[–]RompeChocha71 points72 points  (2 children) | Copy

I can fuck a fatty, but I don't like being seen in public with them.

[–]Merwebb15 points16 points  (0 children) | Copy

Username checks

[–]untapped pool of potential pussyslayingLOL-4-DAYZ27 points28 points  (0 children) | Copy

Fat chicks are like mopeds.....there fun to ride until your friends see you on one.

[–]asapzombie 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

Oh man, what a story, hahaha.

In the words of RSD Tyler: "So to get started, just go with the trolls, now you might say: 'Do I have to fuck the troll?' And no, you don't have to fuck the troll, but for some of you guys sitting here, I look and you and say, 'Yeah, you're going to have to fuck the troll."

So now that you've been able to get some sexy times with this chick, try it again with a slightly more attractive one. Keep working on yourself, lifting, meditating, etc. You'll be where you want to sooner than you realize.

[–]Chadster1133 points4 points  (4 children) | Copy

Will meditating increase my SMV ? I don't get it. (Being serious and a smart ass at the same time)

[–]yumyumgivemesome13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy

Meditation benefits everyone in different ways -- and I've never heard anyone say their time/effort dedicated to meditation was a waste. It's not directly related to SMV, but the strength it provides to your frame and EQ certainly will be reflected in your SMV.

[–]Uberfeedus5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy

Meditation teaches you that everything is IMPERMANENT and you calm the mind helping you to react to all of life's stresses in a balanced way. It helps stop the cycles of aversion and craving.

[–]resnine0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Any books/websites you would recommend? I tried headspace, didn't do it for me.

[–]Uberfeedus1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I just did a Vipassana course. over 100 hours of meditation in a pure environment. Really helps drive the experience of meditation home. I just recommend do it a bunch, and see what Goenka who teaches Vip meditation has to say about it on youtube.

[–]frankreyes26 points27 points  (0 children) | Copy

I can’t date ugly or fat girls.

Nobody can. Not guys, not girls. The thing is that the definition of "ugly" is very much different between the two.

Good experience, it was great that you went through it.

[–]anusbleach1111127 points28 points  (0 children) | Copy

Holy shit this is hilarious,

came on her face and looked at her fat body and rolls while she was covered in cum and I think “what the fuck is wrong with me”

Lololol this sounds like a alternate ending scene out of Superbad or something.

[–][deleted] 33 points34 points  (0 children) | Copy

good job and don’t worry about the fat girl because this was a good learning experience. better to learn with a fattie than not to learn at all. Now treat all girls exactly as if they were all this fat girl. All the steps you described looked right out of TRP. Keep lifting ,improving as much as possible and you’ll soon be getting those 6+ hotties.

[–]02537-411018 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

You're a great storyteller.

I'm like you; not the best looking, wishy-washy friendship circles in University, and women are still foreign to me. The best thing to do right now is keep walking in this general direction.

Hell, all of us are walking with you.

[–]PhaedrusHunt18 points19 points  (0 children) | Copy

First of all, most girls don't give good handjobs.

Second, lol you don't know if you went inside her or not. Hit it from behind it make her get on too if you're fucking a fatty. She'll make sure it gets in lol

Third don't take the time to "dump" this type of chick. Just ghost.

Fourth who fucking cares if you're ugly? You think Gene Simmons ever won a beauty pageant? Look, some us won the genetic lottery and look like Sean Connery or Robert Redford. Lemmy still got more pussy than those guys (although he doubltless had some stories like yours)

[–]Bearhardy4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Well you experimentated and you got your results, what ya gonna do now?

Well written btw I had a chuckle

[–]1UnluckyPenguin4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

Let me trim this down to the relevant things...

I’m 20, bad with women, had 1 girlfriend, never had sex.

I am trying to fix this. I’m on week 7 of lifting. Been reading lots of books. I meditate 10-15 minutes daily. Gave up the porn over a year ago. Don’t fap as much.

Hooked up with a loose, fat girl. Bad idea.

Seems like I have to settle for 6's and below. How can I do better?

Stop calling yourself ugly. When you're making 6 figure's, have a 6-pack, and are 6-feet tall (can't control that last one), girls will be drooling over you regardless of your face.

Keep trying to improve yourself, that's what TRP is all about. Improving yourself will improve your opportunities around work, life, and women. Do what you want to do (unless it's sitting around the house) - like start going backpacking, motorcycle riding, surfing (or just straight up lifting/swimming for 4 hours a day) - find an active hobby rather than a passive one like binging netflix.

Yeah, that chick was a bad idea, but use it next time you're lifting: "I won't date fat girls again" LIFT 1 "I'm going to date someone hotter than a 7" LIFT 2, etc. A lot of us have been there, it's why we seek out TRP knowledge. Depression is natural - accept that you failed and continue your life knowing you won't make the same mistake.

Good luck!

[–][deleted][S] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I’m actually 6’5! :) People here say it’s an advantage, but I don’t see it. What’s the point of being tall if you’re ugly?

But thanks anyways. Right now I’m deadlifting 240, 3x5. I guess for now I should work up to 300, then 400.

[–]1UnluckyPenguin1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Whenever you think you're too ugly for a smoking hot girl, remember the massive amount of ugly celebrities (guys and girls) that have a smoking hot partner.

[–]3d_truth5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy

Great writting. You should write more. When I first started I banged some ugly fatties that made me feel very remorseful when I came.

My advice to you would be to instantly ban yourself from all negative self talk. That shit drags you down. I am extremely confident about this point. You must never do it. It becomes a habit and a self fullfilling prophecy. There's a reason saying postive affirmations is recommended by alot of people.

[–][deleted][S] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

How do I stop it? Negative thoughts have been with for a long, long time. They’re normal at this point, and honestly at this point I feel like they’re what I deserve. What positive things can I say, when I don’t exactly have things to be positive about. Like I said, I have no friends, I haven’t accomplished much in my life, I suck with woman, etc.

[–]3d_truth0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Yes I can tell it is normal for you. It seeps out through your writing. 2 things to do to stop it. 1st is recognize that you don't want to do it anymore. Reading my story might help.

I used to do the same. I would call myself an awkward, anti social loser until it became a normal thought pattern in my head. Things got alot worse, pretty much spent most of my early/mid twenties on my own, no girls, just caught in this downward spiral which was fueled by my negative self talk.

Then I was rescued by a friend who gave me a book "a new earth" by echart tolle. It made me realise the damage I was doing to myself, and the destructive power of the mind. Our thoughts and our minds are the foundations of our life. Negative thoughts will lead to a negative mind state and a negative life.

Your negative self talk ends up become a self fulfilling prophecy. You think you are bad now.

I have no friends, I haven’t accomplished much in my life, I suck with woman,

keep up with this shit, and watch in horror how much worse your life will become. What we think, we become.

You're on this subreddit to make a change. You wont change until you address this. Luckily for you, this is the easiest and most positive change you can make.

So hopefully you now realise you need to stop. The 2nd thing you need to do is simply catch yourself whenever you do it. That is all. If you start thinking of yourself in a negative way, just notice what you are doing. You will stop naturally and your bad habit will grind to a halt.

[–][deleted][S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

So what positive things can I saw to better my mind? What are some positive thoughts?

Also, the book you’re referring to, is it called New Earth or the Power of Now?

Looked it up ok Amazon and all I got was Power of snow by that same author you mentioned.

[–]3d_truth0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Its called 'A new earth'. I prefer it to 'power of now'. The most important thing is to stop the negative thoughts. But practicing gratitude and finding the positive things in your life is extremely powerful aswell. I'm not sure what you have in your life, maybe you are young, healthy, intelligent, have a family, are educated. And you have the desire and willingness to improve yourself which puts you ahead of most others. Start lifting if you havent already, that will give you something else to immediately think positively about.

[–]Jaythe4th1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Good learning experience and keep doing what are doing now, keep improving yourself.

[–]netopatineto1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You say you're really ugly yet you feel like you've disrespected yourself by going low. That's good signal I think, I would be worried if you were a high SMV liberally fucking fatties.

[–]michaelkc031 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I’d be lying if I said didn’t bang a couple fatties. Consider it a rite of passage to the game. Definitely never going back to those depths, but now the only way is up OP. Good lesson for self respect.

[–]Endorsed ContributorUEMcGill3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

I had a friend in college who used to announce, "alright boys it's time to shake the skunk off. I'm going fatty." but man he would get back in the saddle after; total confidence builder.

Sometime you fuck them, sometimes they fuck you. Sooner or later there's a chick you'd rather not been seen by your friends with.

[–]Republic_of_Ash1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Haha, what a story, Mark!

[–]GainzdalfTheWhey1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Recently I've been using couple fat chicks as masturbation tools, but then I came (lol) to the conclusion that's its best to just not do it. Forget fat girls.

[–]wkndatbernardus1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

The fact that you hit it with this land whale isn't necessarily a bad thing. Fattys can be some of the most sexually experimental ladies around, especially if they have big bombs. I say, enjoy yourself. More cusion for the...

[–]CutLiver1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

The guys who say they've never been with a fat/ugly chick or one that was below their standards are delusional or simply liars. We've all got at least one or two we regret. That's part of learning about yourself and what you want in a woman. No shame in it. And nothing to be embarrassed about.

[–]lapeparoja1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

The more inexperienced I was the bigger the deal on how hot the girl I fucked had to be. After fucking many women, you will realize it is mostly the same shit, yeah it is nice to fuck a tight body, everybody would prefer it, but sometimes you crave variety, and fucking some overweight or heavily tattooed, or super-slutty girl is not the end of the world, on the contrary it can be great fun since there are 0 risks of oneitis, just the pure pleasure of sex.

[–]yumyumgivemesome0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Congratulations on your new experience and life lesson. You shudder today, you'll cringe tomorrow, and in a year you'll crack up laughing to yourself about it. I've had plenty of sexual experiences that I wanted to completely erase from my memory soon after... now I look back on them indifferently but completely okay with the fact that they happened because I know they partially shaped me into who I am. Likewise, these awkward and uncomfortable experiences are some of the best at shaping you into who you will become. It's easy for me to say, but honestly, don't fret about this too much. Carry on bettering yourself. I guarantee that you will not be stuck with 6s for your life, but you sure as hell gotta practice on someone so that you're a sexual stallion by the time you start dating the 8+s.

[–]esong_ninnur0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I commend you. Not many men have to go through fucking a big one, and the men that haven't ever had sex don't even want to think about a fatty being their first. About 3 years ago I lost my virginity to an enormous hippo of a woman as I was coming straight out of high school. She would not stop messaging me for a month as I never messaged her back after that night that I attempted (and somehow succeeded) to have sex with her. 4 years later, every time I tell my current plates about how I lost my virginity we both can't stop laughing. I have went a long way, and now I am "allowed" to have better taste in women. You are taking baby steps. I can guarantee you 110% you have the right mindset and that you will fuck better women if you keep trying like you are. Keep going out there, keep lifting, and stay hungry for sex.

[–]AshyBoneVR40 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Then she gave me a blowjob, first one ever. I came all over her face.

I call that a win. The fuck you talkin about?

After I came, I was looking at her fat body and I was thinking to myself “what the fuck is wrong with me. This is gross”.

That moment is called La petite mort, or the little death. Look it up lol.

[–]horacre0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I have been in a similar situation, only my girl wasn't fat. But the dynamics were the same in the sense that I didn't find her attractive enough. I stayed with her for some time because she was infatuated as hell with me, and was really enthusiastic about the sex, but eventually it got old and i realized I won't be able to bear waking up next to her face for 10 years.

[–]Shaney960 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I think the lesson here is that you shouldn't be going against what you want and disrespecting yourself for the sake of 'getting experience.'

I'm very inexperienced myself, and recently went on a date with a pretty fat girl. I don't find her attractive, but observed the temptation in myself to pursue her for sex for that 'experience'. A rule of thumb: If you don't truly want it, don't go after it.

People on here have advised a "any hole's a goal" mentality, which I don't support, since I believe it can reduce integrity, depending on the individual.

Your 'high standards' mean you gotta earn that 'upper-tier pussy'. Of course, getting girls you deem 'out of your league' may prove near impossible at your current SMV. And with that, you know what you gotta do: work on yourself. Put pussy aside for the time being (if it comes, it comes), and keep working on yourself.

[–]resnine0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah I was considering the same route as you, date a fat chick. But I ultimately realize that is a form of self-disrespect, it lowers you, your self-esteem/confidence/worth. It boosts them, and lowers you. I think what you were thinking "hey date a date a fat girl, get some experience, hey what could go wrong?", that mentality is **toxic** and will leave you feeling worse than you were before. I have never dated a fatty, but in moments of weakness I was considering dating a 350 pounder, like you, out of pure desperation, experimentation, and experience. I made a post on here about it, and thought it over, all said not to do it and it will destroy what self-respect/esteem you have at this point. To date a fatty means you are lowly, it basically is like confirmation, the nail in the coffin, it is like saying to yourself "I have no worth, I have no value, so let me date something well below me", dating is sort of like the clothes you wear, the car, house you have. You wouldn't wear rags, or beat up shoes, the same can be said for dates. When you wear beat up clothing, it hurts you feeling of self-worth. Same with dating someone who is well-below you own value. That is not to say you cannot, if you are into a fat girl, then by all means go for it. But with the angle you have, it is not what you wanted or feel that you deserve. When you know and tell yourself you deserve better, you will manifest it in all that you do. And will not lower your standards for something you know you are more deserving of. What you did was humiliating to your inner-self, you can recover, take this as a learning experience and move on to better.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I’m really ugly. I have no idea how I’m ever going to date a 6 or above again. I got lucky the first time. Not sure how I can do it again.... I’m really lost.

It's easier the second time. You can be more attractive and you should work on that.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Doesn't matter had sex. We all have to start somewhere. She is feeling clingy like that because you are not needy and dont give a fuck about her because she is a landwhale. Now do the same for fuckable women. You are too hard on yourself, you are not pathetic for getting your dick sucked by a fatty. Just continue upping your SMV while gaming progressively more fuckable (literally) chicks and in a few years or so you will be laughing about this whole thing. Don't take yourself too seriously, your story is hilarious

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I've had this same mindset before. I call it my "ugly girl fetish". I find that I'm more into the idea of hooking up with a fatty or ugly girl, but after actually interacting with one I'm almost immediately turned off.

[–]MikeAlphaGolf0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Good story. Well written. And there’s a lesson in it for you.

If you can fuck a fatty you can fuck a hot bird. Try to treat the hottie exactly the same. With a hint of entitlement and superiority. Obviously this is a lot harder as your hamster will be spinning saying you don’t deserve this hot little arse but if you maintain the same attitude then you will no doubt find success if you open and game enough girls.

6’5 is a great start over most mortals. Walk around everywhere like you own the place. Carry that attitude with you and you will start to own social situations and easily attract pussy. If you are truely fugly then tough luck, you won’t win them all but you’ll find enough in shape and good natured chicks to have a great time. That’s what it’s all about.

[–]AMichael22880 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Your story is VERY similar to mine like almost identical lol

[–]Pussymuncher77880 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Are our lives the same ? Cause your story sounds like mine lol. Except mine was somewhat depressing getting head is the best though

[–]Goldrosexoxo0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Lmfaoo I know this is an old threat but atleast now you know what you don’t like. Hopefully you’ve gotten better p—y moving forward.

[–]brian_reddit_770 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Self-Awareness is 90% of the battle. Congrats!

[–]empatheticapathetic0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Sounds like a good experience man. What really went wrong that caused recurring issues? Good work.

[–][deleted][S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

What recurring issues are you referring to?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

A really fat girl will make your dick feel tiny. Also, you have to work past all the fat to even get in there cuz they arent that flexible

Also i wonder if all the fat makes them slower to orgasm

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

You're doing fine so far. You've gotta bang your way UP the ladder. You'll climb the rungs as your SMV increases, so keep working at it.

And don't discount all fatties. I'm about to start a relationship with one because her personality is solid - feminine and submissive. A fat body is easy to fix with patience. But you can't do much with a bitch, no matter how hot or thin she starts out. Look to the personality.

[–]CasinoLucky1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm about to start a relationship with one

Are you talking a bit too chubby here, or legitimately fat ?

[–]dtyler86-3 points-2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Anyone care to create a TL;DR. Cause eh... it’s was TL;DR

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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