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This is why most men don't speak out if they are being abused by their female partners.

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April 29, 2020
26 upvotes
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Post Information
Title This is why most men don't speak out if they are being abused by their female partners.
Author 53withtrollhair
Upvotes 26
Comments 11
Date 29 April 2020 05:20 PM UTC (6 months ago)
Subreddit antifeminists
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/706651
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/antifeminists/comments/gadgzt/this_is_why_most_men_dont_speak_out_if_they_are/
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Comments

[–]tiredfromlife20195 points6 points  (14 children) | Copy

Pretty much.

Men can't even defend themselves cause the female partner could get hurt and if that happens, the guy is even more screwed. Its why you now have videos of women attacking men or trying to provoke them and recording it cause they know the men won't dare strike back.

[–]VestigialHead1 point2 points  (13 children) | Copy

Men need to start recording and posting this abuse.

Personally I would have already ended a relationship where my partner was abusive. but for some reason many people do not seem to be able to end theirs.

[–]tiredfromlife20190 points1 point  (12 children) | Copy

If the abuse happens in a marriage, a man knows that there is a huge chance that when the divorce is settled. He will lose his kids and will be stuck paying alimony and child support to how now ex wife and possibly not be able to see his kids plus house could be gone to wife leaving him with nothing.

As for non marriage? Either they still care for her or have very low chance to get another woman and thus stick with her. It’s been stated in studies that the number of men having sex is going down whereas it’s the opposite for women.

[–]VestigialHead0 points1 point  (11 children) | Copy

I think a major issue is people get married much too fast. If you have not lived with your partner for a few years at least you have no idea who or what they are.

So getting married before that is crazy in my opinion.

What does it matter if a non married man can not get another women? They are usually better of without one anyway. So this is not even the start of an excuse to stay in an abusive relationship.

[–]kluger0 points1 point  (10 children) | Copy

No no no, Studies show that being with a person for a long time before you get married leads to more problems and higher divorce rate. essential the Idea is that people who wait and wait, essentially can't commit. they're not strong people. if you think about it, it makes sense.. so you're with a girl for three or five years and you finally get married. essentially that's saying you couldn't commit, and then eventually you get married because it just makes sense. A relationship like that will either fail or become miserable. Statistically if you live with a girl before you marry her there is a much higher divorce rate.

People are usually in abusive relationships because they choose to be. I'm not saying it's right. but I've been with some pretty fucking crazy girls, they were usually just a harm to themselves. most people would say "don't stick your dick in crazy" etc... or I shouldn't have been in the relationships, but I'm not delusional, I know that I chose it. I loved it. crazy girls are fun. they're usually really good in bed. Some people unconsciously walk through life and say shit like "why do I keep winding up in relationships like this?!". you Attract it, you Chose it.

the point is that people should be treated equally, if a girl beats her boyfriend she should get fucked. One other problem is that girls tend to psychologically abuse guys, I mean just look at how they treat each other, it's detestable. A girl's , being the weaker sex, primary weapon is psychological.

[–]VestigialHead0 points1 point  (9 children) | Copy

The problem is that you have no way of telling if someone is crazy or right for you or not going to be abusive UNLESS you live with them for several years. The person you dated for 12 months is nothing like the person will be once you are living together for 2 years. Dates are an act to make someone like you. Rarely do true colours show up in dating.

I seriously doubt your claims that people that live together for a few years before getting married end up more likely to divorce. I say it is the exact opposite to that.

No one chooses to be in an abusive relationship unless they are absolutely insane. I have quite a few friends who ended up in bad relationships and eventually got out of them Several are now happy in normal non abusive relationships.

I agree with the equal treatment of abusive people no matter their sex or minority. That is basic equality.

[–]kluger0 points1 point  (8 children) | Copy

Okay. I disagree with your idea that it takes years to get to know a person. I think you know a person fairly quickly. You see their aspects. The ratios of their aspects may change over time. But you know their ingredients fairly quickly. A lot of times in relationships people pretend that people will change. People don't introduce new qualities. Normally a person just hopes that the other person might get better. But it's not like these things just appear out of the blue late in a relationship. A better way of saying it is everyone can understand a persons capacity fairly quickly. They weigh it and accept it. They chose the risk. Mostly based off of fear of being alone.

Like I said I've dated a lot of crazy girls. I saw it in them almost immediately.

People lie to themselves.

[–]VestigialHead0 points1 point  (7 children) | Copy

Sorry but that is anything but true. The person you see when dating is nothing like what that person will be like when you are married and no longer trying to impress each other.

This will then be the real them. It is the one you are going to have to live with for 60-70 years.

If all you are doing with your gf or bf is going on dates and hanging out you NEVER see the real them. Only from seeing each other at your worst will you even come close to the real them before marriage.

[–]kluger0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy

If you can't look through a facade and see a real person then you are the definition of asleep. Yeah, maybe you're completely incapable of consciously viewing a person. But your unconscious mind has a full understanding of the people around you

[–]VestigialHead0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

I would say it would take a very experienced very aware person to be able to somehow see the real person through someones dating persona.

That would be a world wise person that has already seen the best and worst life and people have to offer them. Certainly NOT a person in the usual dating age. No 16 - 30 year old has anywhere near the life experience or wisdom to do what you suggest.

So yes it is possible just not for the majority of dating people. So the solution is to live together as boyfriend and girlfriend or whatever combo for a year or so and see the real people.

Not sure why you are so set against this? Did you marry without getting to know your partner and are now feeling a bit worried because of what I am telling you?



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