This happened in my home town, a dude who is fairly active in the local music scene as a frontman and guitarist got accused by his ex of being abusive and manipulative.
The accusations came in the form of 10+ pages of text written by this girl about all the abuse she suffered at the hands of her ex posted on Facebook and Instagram.
She says he did things like gaslight her regularly, via accusing her of sleeping with their mutual friend, to the point where she could no longer tell if she did it or did not.
She says when he got riled up he would stomp about the house, slam doors, and break things. Apparently when this happened she would run and hide under her bed and try to be as quiet as possible.
There's loads more, I don't think any more detail than what I've given is needed for the question to stand.
Upon this post going live he was kicked out of his most successful band (one that was started by and is fronted by a woman) and loads of his friends ditched him too.
Then this guy posted his own statement one week later, basically saying - look we were both as bad as eachother, I deny all allegations of physical and mental abuse, but the relationship was mutually toxic. All these statements have been provided without evidence, and each statement paints her in a much better light than myself, but it was mutual.
Me and my boys discussed this as it unfolded in our group chat, and I was very disappointed in one of my best mates who wholeheartedly stands with her and thinks this guy is a piece of human garbage.
Look, for me, what this girl did was very wrong because it was basically an act of vigilante justice. She had no evidence to back up her claims, and this guys reputation is in the gutter regardless. Full character assasination.
If this happened to me, I think I would completely ignore this girl, in line with the laws of power number 36: By acknowledging a petty problem you give it existence and credibility.
However, maybe everything she posted is true. I don't know. I do know that if everyone supported vigilante justice we'd all be fucked.
What do you think?
Do you think how either of these people handled this situation was okay?
What would you do if your ex posted this about you?
And most importantly for myself, what would you do if your best friend wholeheartedly supported this vigilante justice with no evidence to back it up?
Am I crazy for thinking he is crazy? Should I discuss this with him any further?