Man is devastated after seeing videos of his fiancée having enthusiastic kinky sex with her ex that she won't do with him. Women shame him for feeling bad and suggest she was forced and didn't enjoy it. They then reminisce about the past kinky sex they totally didn't enjoy.

loneliness-inc · 2020-12-26T23:27:02+00:00

I don’t know what I’m doing that’s so wrong that I’m not making her react that way. The only thing that I could think of was that his penis was significantly larger than mine,

Listen my dear sir and all men reading this. You did absolutely nothing wrong!!!

Listen here dear man, you're being a good boyfriend and husband. You're doing what's right. However, she will never be satisfied because of the choices she made. This is explained in the warm home analogy.

For those who are inclined to blame the man, please remember to stop blaming men for women's poor choices.

And for those who still insist on blaming the man, we're going to ban your stupid ass as u/kevin32 said:

Please observe rule 1. We're exposing women's dual-mating nature and the support she receives, not mocking the man who is blue-pilled/beta.

LaLa_Land543 · 2020-12-26T13:57:01+00:00

My least favorite part of these women-centric subs is that instead of addressing the OP itself, every reply is just an excuse to talk about themselves and go into some personal story. It becomes a massive Great Wall of Text that needs to be scrolled past in order to get to the actual responses to OP.

InevitableOwl1 · 2020-12-26T14:18:09+00:00

It is absolutely staggering how pretty much every woman in that thread assumes and is completely prepared to believe that the lady was “coerced” into doing all those sex acts. With absolutely zero evidence or information to suggest as much in the main post

fuzzy_brb · 2020-12-26T14:32:08+00:00

Alpha fucks,beta bucks.

She’s given all her best to her ex. Now its time to settle for you and give you what little she has left.

I foresee a deadbedroom in their future. But once she separates from him, which she will after popping out a few kids and being a stay at home mom to secure his military resources,her libido will come back mysteriously.

Different coloured hair: massive red flag....bail immediately.

SoakMyBigCork · 2020-12-26T14:06:43+00:00

Women shame him for feeling bad and suggest she was forced and didn't enjoy it.

Yeah, I bet she didn't enjoy it. And I bet the videos totally didn't show her grabbing the sheets and screaming "Oh God! Yes! Harder! HARDER! Pull my hair! Slap my ass! HARDER!!!". But she's not like that anymore for poor Billy.

SniXSniPe · 2020-12-26T16:14:01+00:00

She doesn't find you as attractive or masculine and she is with you despite the sex. You're a nice guy though, which her ex wasn't and even though she isn't sexually satisfied she feels safe and comfortable with you. You're a good person to settle for. Not hot, not arousing, but safe.

this comment in that thread pretty much hit the nail on the head

panzer22222 · 2020-12-26T15:12:11+00:00

She is one phone call from ex away from cheating on this guy.

ThatDamnedRedneck · 2020-12-26T13:17:28+00:00

Pretty standard story, no surprises here. Any indication of how this one turned out?

kevin32 · 2020-12-26T14:43:10+00:00

Please observe rule 1. We're exposing women's dual-mating nature and the support she receives, not mocking the man who is blue-pilled/beta.

Captainbuttman · 2020-12-26T17:17:37+00:00

While I kind of think its a fake post, whats really important are the comments. Barely anybody in that thread acknowledges his feelings and instead make tons of assumptions and rationalizations for the girl (with often contrary evidence).

Bing_Bang_Bam · 2020-12-26T17:29:19+00:00

That dude is overseas? With a hoe like that? Ouch

RealMcGonzo · 2020-12-26T15:41:23+00:00

A huge dose of extra-bitter RP there, yikes. After reading the EDIT, I see there are worse lessons to come.

Old_snowboarder · 2020-12-26T17:19:58+00:00

If women are so easily influenced perhaps they shouldn't have the right to vote?

Adam95x · 2020-12-26T16:39:42+00:00

Another point for the religions that tell you not to have pre marital sex

azynporter · 2020-12-26T18:13:41+00:00

Bro the relationship advice sub is CANCEROUS.

Upset_chin_lady · 2020-12-26T18:57:38+00:00

I think that the biggest red flag from the get go should’ve been her getting a tattoo on her ASS a year after they started dating, wifey material (not). Also, considering the fact that he’s in the military, she’s just a wannabe dependa who’s now acting prudish. And this is coming from a woman.

Bennyjig · 2020-12-26T20:27:04+00:00

Damn they really will explain away everything. “She has trauma from that” yeah moaning loud as hell while getting smashed is precisely how you show discontent

Drp345 · 2020-12-26T21:19:24+00:00

If she's willing to do all that kinky shit with the ex, and not him, she's clearly not aroused by her current man. She'd bend over backwards for him otherwise.

Desire cannot be negotiated. So no matter what this man does, he's not going to get the same enthusiasm she gave to her ex. Simple as that.

2020-12-26T13:47:55+00:00

[removed]

Typo-MAGAshiv · 2020-12-26T19:11:57+00:00

[removed]

dildo_bagmans · 2020-12-26T19:36:33+00:00

I tend to agree with the people on that thread calling it fake. However, in the event that it isn't, I would just say that this guy is an idiot. There can be nothing "traumatic" about a woman who was enjoying getting fucked so much her legs were shaking and she was screaming this man's name.

HephaestusRuin · 2020-12-27T00:32:33+00:00

The amount of heavy lifting done for women by the phrase "I was a different person back then" is frankly staggering. "Oh, well, that's the version of you I wanted to date" is not used nearly enough.

Tweapodok33 · 2020-12-26T21:16:06+00:00

He needs to get out. Even on the slim possibility that the scenario is 100% in favor of the woman (meaning she was abused, she was faking it, she was coerced into it, etc.), he won’t be able to let that go. It’s going to plague his mind for years to come. Best thing for both of them is to separate.

2020-12-27T00:27:05+00:00

That's absolutely my 1st question when meeting someone these days.

"Are there any pictures of you on the internet?"

2nd is "can you show me your instagram"

Tons of bikini selfies?

Oh, I'm getting a phone call... It's the streets calling...

Blogginginvicecity · 2020-12-26T18:53:14+00:00

Love is a verb and it sounds like she ain't loving him like she loved others.

2020-12-26T13:41:59+00:00

[removed]

DickVonPounDatSnatch · 2020-12-26T19:04:43+00:00

I feel like the problem with this post in general is it's the guy focusing on himself and his reaction to the act itself and less than the woman's reactions. I wish he went into more detail about her initial reaction when he told her about this. All we know is that he had to convince her to file a report for revenge porn, which she clearly did a double take but said "fuck it" and did it anyway because she likes that military money. I don't know, posts like these really make A+ material hard to extract.

bigshoveldude8673 · 2020-12-26T20:44:08+00:00

This is terrifying. I almost feel bad for the guy, but since his first instinct wasn't to break off the engagement I can't feel bad for someone who puts themselves through this.

What's worse is how the comments are rarely addressing his pain and feelings of betrayal and are immediately giving sympathy to the fiance. Saying how he needs to help her heal. WTF.

scholarofpain · 2020-12-26T21:40:54+00:00

If he thinks this is the worst it could get.. it's most likely only the tip of the iceberg.

If a woman denies reasonable requests of kinky sex, sees it as a chore, etc... It's time to run. The bedroom will only further dry up at an accelerated rate.

Demiansky · 2020-12-26T21:58:18+00:00

The sad thing is how he wonders "what's wrong with him" that his fiancee isn't as sexually enticed by him. The irony is that its "what's right with him" that is turning her off. For a lot of women, nothing makes them want to please a man more than being treated like dirt so as to elicit some scrap of effection. But give away that effection for free? No reason to work for it anymore.

happychickenpalace · 2020-12-26T22:09:26+00:00

"I hate these sexual acts that I did with totally not ugly Chads, so I'm gonna write a whole damn essay describing in vivid detail what I did with them just to really drive home the point how much I hated doing them!"

liaisonguy · 2020-12-27T04:20:01+00:00

TIL that the relationship advice subreddit is toxic. I read the first 6 replies and gave up on their terrible gynocentric advice. I sure hope that dude finds his own way to an explanation of dual mating strategy.

engineerjoe2 · 2020-12-26T21:19:51+00:00

The guy should just move on and save himself the cost of the divorce 10 years down the road.

Suk1tUpButterCup · 2020-12-27T00:51:12+00:00

Wow, reading through that thread gave me a headache... Not only do I think it's possibly a karma whoring post... (fake) but, the amount of women who put their two cents in and made it all about themselves was astonishing; EVEN though that was expected... the amount was still eye opening.

Almost every single one had something to say that resulted in all their comments being directed to everything being "a mans fault". Society today, especially the female side of it, is completely and totally self centered and all about "MEEEEEEEEE" with no concern for anyone else. This guys GF/fiancé is no less of a CC riding ho than the next one and they ALL come to her defense because they ALL believe their own BS and must stick together to protect their game...

What was even more of a shock was the poor OP's edit...:

I want to first say that to those of you insulting my fiancée please fuck off. She is an amazing woman, and is not deserving of whatever shit you sling at her.

First off, it's reddit, if you didn't think you'd get backlash and comments about the type of girl people think she is, then you shouldn't be posting your personal business on a public forum. Part of me thinks the entire post is bullshit simply because of this; looks like it just may be one of those "woe is me" stories generated to pull in UV's and awards from the very type of group that responded.

even so, playing devils advocate; It's such a shame that even when presented with hard evidence (no pun intended) to prove his GF/fiancé was not who he thought she was, he is still asleep at the wheel and refuses to wake up. As stated in the top post of this thread. He did nothing wrong but, even after being presented with who she really is, he is pissing on those who are trying to wake him up from a dream that will ultimately become a nightmare.

I guess for some it takes a whole hell of a lot more to swerve and not hit that tree... this poor guy is destined for heartbreak and a horrible divorce-rape if he stays. She is obviously capable of much more than she offers him, but because he has been satisfied (up until he saw the videos) with what he's been given, she will continue to take what she can from him without offering up more. Unless of course, this opens his eyes finally and either he starts demanding more, or she realizes that her game has been exposed and quickly exits; then again, as he said, he hasn't mentioned it to her at all yet... wish I was present to see what unfolds if/when he does bring it up. IF... now that would be some popcorn eating, beer guzzling fun to watch...

EthanWaberx · 2020-12-26T13:39:05+00:00

Oh god

Mgtowgoldsteinberger · 2020-12-26T21:48:42+00:00

Simple alpha fucks beta bucks stuff. If you dont want to buck always pump and dump.

Tap-Apart · 2020-12-27T11:21:53+00:00

I had a traumatic experience with my ex where she used me for money.

Because of that traumatic experience I will give you the bare minimum of money even though I bought my ex romantic get-aways and fancy dinners.

I just really need you to understand, that my ex has totally destroyed my trust in other people and that's why I'm so cheap with you.

HOW THE FUCK WOULD PEOPLE RESPOND TO THAT?!!!!!!

Women would be laughing their asses off and bail immediately.

That's why dudes should bail immediately if you're not getting what you need.

Yarchening · 2020-12-26T20:36:17+00:00

I can understand not wanting to do stuff on video again because of this, but not doing the other stuff just seems suspicious.

coloradocaniac · 2020-12-26T20:56:22+00:00

I hope the guy packed his stuff and got out.

To the women who don't like it: it's quite obvious you don't care about him, or us, so why should we stick around?

philosophic_insight · 2020-12-26T23:42:54+00:00

Any man who has experienced this, feels down because his partner wouldn't do things for him that she does for others. Excuses and gaslighting I have read so far: I dislike it so I didn't want to have to start. Its not something that I believe should occur between equals(implying they are above you in standing). It was my hoe phase. I was experimenting and shouldn't be expected to continue. It was a mistake. You never asked, I would have done whatever you asked. I thought you would think less of me if you knew I liked that stuff. You wouldn't like stuff like that. I'm your wife, wives don't perform such acts.

These are just from lurking on this sub and a few other choice picks.

me-dgaf · 2020-12-27T05:37:26+00:00

He's the beta on the way being married and then divorce rape.

The ex is the alpha that she'll be returning to after said divorce rape.

Clear as day.

washerelastweek · 2020-12-27T07:42:39+00:00

I am in a slightly different situation. I used to have great kinky sex with a girl. We're are not together as I didn't turned out to be a good husband material. But we still write to each other on messenger. She's got a boyfriend now and he's just as we could expect a typical beta. She says she likes him a lot etc. But she and I met once recently, as she was returning something she borrowed from me. As we did not see each other for like 9 months I hugged her. And I tell you, the way her body automatically turned submissive... you just feel it. I'm sure she would go to bed with me. No doubts about it. And I'm sure she would resist a little. So she could say she tried. So, about the OP's story - let me put it this way: I don't believe he and his fiancee are going to have a bright future. Also, even if she doesn't cheat on him, his frustration will grow, like a non healing wound.

Edit: I just realized she writes to me more often that I write to her. Here's the answer.

Cr0ssedPaths · 2020-12-26T19:45:46+00:00

I always have to wonder about regret. Regret doing those things, or it being known? My other thought is this, if she was coerced, then she was acting for the benefit of the ex-bf. she was willing for him, but not the fiancé. Or she was into it, but doesn’t have those intense feelings for the fiancé. From the OP, there were several videos, so this isn’t a one time thing.

Either way, it’s telling. Sadly, this is a story that we have seen time and time again.

My thought on the ex’s motivation. He may miss her, but it might making the current guy disgusted and break things off to help the guy out in the long run. Or the ex was drunk and fired it off. Either way, I generally avoid sending anything from my phone while enjoying a few drinks.

goatxoxoxo · 2020-12-27T07:27:57+00:00

This was by far one of most depressing posts I've seen on this sub. The truth is even if she doesn't wish to perform those acts now out of preference, she has done it with someone else and that too to a much greater extent. She has enjoyed it immensely and OP has video proof of that. The other women saying they were coerced into it or whatever doesn't matter, we have video proof she enjoyed it.

OP literally asked for vanilla stuff, spanking or pulling back her hair or holding her down. That is not even close to kinks like giving BJs in a car in the public, getting tied up, getting handcuffed, etc.

OP can't change the history, neither can she. She did those things willingly and that's the end of it. OP now has to live with the fact she won't perform those acts which she has with other men she has been in bed with. Call it ego, call it being red-pilled, whatever you want to call it but that's the truth.

Rather than having it bite away at his self esteem or ego, OP should end the relationship. That's the go to advice for terrible relationship discussions on Reddit anyway.

Homely_Bonfire · 2020-12-27T08:12:14+00:00

She sold herself cheap to the first guy, felt like she should be worth more and now that this dude finds out that he is paying too much for her her strategy goes down the drain. Best part: SHE needs support?! She tricked some guy into thinking she could keep her legs together in front of the camera and now that there is prove (delivered in a bad way, but still solid), SHE would need support to face HER past? What about the guy she lied to?

What a sh*tshow XD

Hopefully he realizes he can do better than being the toy of some manipulative witch.

batfish55 · 2020-12-26T17:30:00+00:00

There's hundreds of posts like this on r/theredpill

BluepillProfessor · 2020-12-26T22:32:13+00:00

This gets an A+ for the title alone. Good job.

Lord_Kano · 2020-12-27T01:11:35+00:00

That poor SOB. He should dump her immediately.

Everyone has a past but because of her hard limits that didn't matter so much when she was with her ex.

Lordpennywise · 2020-12-27T01:38:55+00:00

Clown word LMAO

UltimaterializerX · 2020-12-27T03:19:23+00:00

Ah yes, the “abusive ex boyfriend” excuse. The women there are all claiming it on her behalf even though they know nothing. It’s just a catch-all excuse for why the husband should be happy that his wife won’t fuck him properly.

Youngadult26advice · 2020-12-27T06:43:25+00:00

Some learn faster than others

bigdaveyl · 2020-12-27T11:32:10+00:00

The first question I have in these situations is why didn't you leave if there was pressure to do certain sex acts that you were uncomfortable with? I mean, we have a whole system set up to help women in these situations, like shelters and what not in case of the worst situations. Also, if it was that bad, why weren't the authorities contacted about possible sexual assault? Isn't "revenge porn" like this illegal in some locales? And, the last concern I have is has she gotten counseling/therapy based on what happened here? What I'm trying to get at is if there was actual abuse/rape/coercion, certain things should happen, and you can't retroactively claim something bad happened. I'm guessing what happened is she was young/inexperienced and wanted to fit in and "be the fun girlfriend." The relationship didn't work out so she was saying she was coerced, because she wanted him to like her, so she agreed to do stuff she wasn't comfortable with.

ogrilla99 · 2020-12-28T08:40:37+00:00

The worst part about all of this, is that, even if it's true that she was coerced or didn't enjoy it, the guy should leave. If he wants to be a gentleman about it, then maybe help her over the initial trauma of the videos [sic], but don't plan a longterm future with her. Why? Because it's not his job to fix a broken woman. He's making the same mistake as a woman who looks at an ex-felon and says "I can fix him".

Reading through the comments, of all these women with weird hangups with intimacy and emotional breakdowns over simple things like holding hands or hugging their boyfriends, I just have to ask, why? Why would a guy want to start a life with someone like that? It's one thing if you're already married and you're committed. And maybe an argument could be made that since they're engaged, they're almost there. But to me, that "almost" is key: it's not too late.

If she didn't enjoy what she did on those videos (I doubt this) then he can feel bad for her, and hope she gets better, but he has no obligation to be the one to come and clean up the psychological mess that some other guy made. It's hard enough to build a life with someone who's normal and healthy. It's torture to try to do so with someone who's already broken. If she wasn't coerced and it was the best sex of her life, then you will have an unhappy sex life which will become an unhappy life in general. And if she was coerced, then she will have hangups and traumas and it's not your obligation to fix them. Either way, the guy should leave now, before he ties the knot.

I_CAPE_RUNTS · 2020-12-26T17:53:43+00:00

[removed]

Mundane_Worldliness7 · 2020-12-26T15:56:31+00:00

Reading through the whole thread makes me wish our rules were slightly more flexible regarding what we can say about guys.... I’ll respect the rules of the sub...Edit- to be sure, to whatever extent this has been mishandled, it’s been mishandled as a consequence of the girls behavior.

jackandjill22 · 2020-12-27T03:08:20+00:00

Oh boy

CelestialAmorphous · 2020-12-30T08:39:51+00:00

I just can't feel sorry for him he still choosing to marry her. Even in my blue pill days I would have escaped but he wants to marry her? Oh well I don't want to break rule 1 but this fella is beyond helping will learn the hard way. Sadly

loneliness-inc · 2020-12-26T19:33:38+00:00

[removed]

loneliness-inc · 2020-12-26T22:09:28+00:00

[removed]

cheappay · 2020-12-27T03:15:05+00:00

Shit's fake

esotericcunt · 2020-12-26T18:18:40+00:00

Savinasauce · 2020-12-26T20:37:50+00:00

Sounds about right, When I was in my twenties I liked to date women a few years older than me. You would be amazed the number of women who in their late 20s STILL did not understand their own bodies. These women had 2 things in common which was all of their ex boyfriends were terrible at sex and that the g spot did not exist. I kid you not, it took me about 20 seconds to find their g spot and maybe 60 seconds to give them their first g spot orgasm. My point is this is typical of female sexual behavior, blame everything that does not go right on men and take ZERO personal accountability. Just like the fiance, sad to see him defend her the way he is doing.

scoutthedog1 · 2020-12-26T15:15:03+00:00

[removed]

Ok-Reflection7331 · 2020-12-26T18:32:49+00:00

[removed]