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"How To Spot a Dangerous Man Before You Get Involved"

August 16, 2022

Originally posted this on the Left-Wing Male Advocates sub and got re-directed here.

This is the actual title of a book I noticed at work earlier at my bookstore job when I was going the rounds and noticed it in the personal growth/self-help section. I mean wow, how does is this book NOT blatantly misandrist with it's title? I read the summary on the back and it tells women how to spot predatory men and common ways men prey on women, and more about women's safety as such. As usual, not a peep about men's safety as well in addition. Is the author also going to do a book about how to spot dangerous women and the ways women prey on and harm men? Both men and women are a danger to one another and are capable of the same terrible things but as usual, only the men we have to be wary of.

I'm fed up with this anti-male, fearmongering BS that demonizes men as a whole and fails to acknowledge that women can also be very dangerous, predatory and violent. Towards men, women, children and animals. Why not just write a book telling both men AND women alike how to spot dangerous people? But as usual, it has to be made into a gendered thing.

The book's author is Sandra L. Brown and I'm not sure of the publisher but both should definitely be boycotted.

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Post Information
Title "How To Spot a Dangerous Man Before You Get Involved"
Author Skeleton_Warrior
Upvotes 27
Comments 9
Date August 16, 2022 12:23 AM UTC (7 months ago)
Subreddit /r/EverydayMisandry
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/EverydayMisandry/how-to-spot-a-dangerous-man-before-you-get.1127874
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/everydaymisandry/comments/wpfks3/how_to_spot_a_dangerous_man_before_you_get/

[–]a-man-from-earth 7 points8 points  (16 children) | Copy Link

From the description and reviews of this book, I don't see anything necessarily wrong with it.

As male advocates we shouldn't be blind to the fact that some men are dangerous and unfit to have a relationship with, just as that is true for some women.

If you have read it and seen that it paints men in general as dangerous, then you'd have a point. Until then, I remain skeptical.

[–]Skeleton_Warrior[S] -3 points-2 points  (15 children) | Copy Link

Thing is the book only focuses on dangerous men when the focus equally should be on both men and women alike. Both can be dangerous to each other.

[–]Skeleton_Warrior[S] 1 point2 points  (14 children) | Copy Link

Why was this downvoted? What's downvote-worthy about pointing out the fact both dangerous men and women exist, and one should be equally wary of both?

[–]a-man-from-earth 3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

This book was written for women seeking to date men. They would have no use for knowing about the types of women they should not date.

Someone could write an analogous book for men about recognizing dangerous women they should avoid to date. This is just a question of addressing a specific target audience.

[–]Skeleton_Warrior[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I think it's important knowledge for both men and women, as both are equally vulnerable to predatory people.

[–]cromulent_weasel 1 point2 points  (11 children) | Copy Link

Perhaps because it depends on who the target audience for the book is.

[–]Skeleton_Warrior[S] 0 points1 point  (10 children) | Copy Link

While women may be slightly more prone to being targeted, it happens to men as well and it's equally important both know how to be on-alert for predatory people.

[–]BloomingBrains 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'd be interested in checking the book out to see what it says first before making any judgements. Who knows, maybe its going to give actual good advice.

Granted, in today's climate, it is most likely going to demonize shy/nerdy/non-traditional men whilst ignoring genuine f*ckboi behavoir. But I guess I like to hold out hope that one day something will be different, and the title is not inherently misandrist.

[–]vegano-aureo 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I think nobody disagrees that there is a hysterical demonization of men pervasive in our culture as well as a denial of the fact that women are dangerous too but I don't want there to always be the need for lip service.

For example if I talk about men's issues I don't want to always have to add "keep in mind, women have issues too". I think that is destructive to the conversation.

Of course a part of me feels triggered by book titles like these given the cultural context that we live in. But at the same time I know women who always end up with dudes who are shady in type of way. If this book actually helps those women than I think it is a good thing. Many people feel attracted to abusive people because of all the abuse they have been through. That is all they know.

The problem is just that misandry nowadays is not stigmatized. You can be openly misandric and be celebrated for it. Hence the need for this sub but at the same time we are making progress. Johnny would have never won 10 or even 5 years ago. Every day men are coming forward talking about their experiences and slowly but surely men's rights inch towards the mainstream all the while misandrist are raging but it is getting better every day.

I look at misandrist today like I look at my Grandma saying the nword and talking about black people. She doesn't get it. She was brought up where these views were normal and this type of language common. I have tried explaining it to her but she doesn't understand. I guarantee you there will be people in 50 years saying stuff like kill all men and their grandchildren will roll their eyes. Here we go again.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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