Are black women really that undesirable?

honey-bundy-88 · 2021-09-04T16:32:27+00:00

I will answer this based on what I perceive to be the red pilled perspective:

Black women are known for being race loyal. I think society has a lot to do with what we find attractive and Black people have been at the bottom of the social, economic, and cultural totem pole in the United States for a long time. The red pill community is obsessed with this hierarchy and use the model of the submissive, docile woman (a mold black women have been considered the antithesis of) to further shame a group of women, who they believe already have fewer options, into line. Because of this we are used as a cautionary tale for other women of what not to be in order to get a “good man”.

This is something that I had to unlearn for myself. As a black woman, I have been hearing since the age of 3 that I was not desirable due to my race. Since then I’ve heard it again in about 1000 other ways. With where I am now, I can honestly say people do fine black women attractive. Interracial dating has become more popular amongst black women recently because we have all started to unlearn the conscious and unconscious biases formed against us by both the media and ourselves. For me all it really took was a change in location. I learned that one of the primary reasons I wasn’t being approached by non-black men was because there was an assumption that as a non-black man I would not be attracted to them. It’s not that we are inherently less than other groups of women, but this narrative has been reinforced so much that we have begun perpetuating it ourselves. Your perceptions shape your reality. If you believe a group will not find you attractive because of your race then you tend to put up wall to ensure that that will happen. So if we really wanted to we could reverse it.

Early-Damage-6792 · 2021-09-04T21:58:58+00:00

When people speak on black women not being desirable they are usually speaking on the ratchet, super hood chick. These women are usually loud, obnoxious and very argumentative. The reality is that those woman, though a large percentage of them, is still only a minority. People pick the bad apples and act as if they represent the whole group. Couldn’t be less true

StrongSecurity · 2021-09-04T12:54:23+00:00

Q: is Tyra Banks and Iman considered undesirable?

I had a crush on Thandie Newton when she was in Mi2

SenorTonto · 2021-09-04T14:46:27+00:00

Plenty of people like black women including myself but I am black

Rare-Cash2655 · 2021-09-04T10:46:52+00:00

No. I am a hetrosexal white woman and I can see how beautiful, strong and intelligent a lot black women are, so I can't imagne how men don't feel attracted to them. If I were gay, I would be proud to have a black woman by my side. With all the pill bullshit going on these days, I wish I was gay. Men are the ones not being attractive anymore.

xaviorbuilder02 · 2021-09-04T23:06:54+00:00

So many guys are attracted to black Women. There’s a lot of stereotypes about them not being submissive or feminine and so much of the red pill community is made up of black men that hate themselves. Black women have had to work throughout history and are more likely to have to raise a family alone. They can intimidate some weak men who haven’t accomplished much. And when black women do date outside their race, they generally get very “high value” men too. Strong and successful men are attracted to women with the same qualities. I’d recommend watching Tonya TKO because she explains a lot of this really well. If it’s a preference then that’s fine. There’s nothing wrong with that as long as you don’t bring down others.

Aggressive-Complex79 · 2021-09-04T12:06:21+00:00

What is the point of this post? Most black women prefer to date within their race anyway, so they’re not concerned with being desired by men they’re not interested in.

I personally have never ever had any issues attracting men from any race. I wonder where you’re getting your information from?

Venustarr_777 · 2021-09-04T17:44:42+00:00

Let's back track to the so called stereotype because with some stereotypes, there's an element of truth to it.

Try growing up in the hood as a young black girl prim and proper, sweet and docile, and watch what'll happen to you.

So you learn through your environment. Most men don't show up for us, so you have to be "strong". We don't have the world groveling at our feet putting us on a pedestal so you have to have masculine traits as a female.

The red pill are a bunch of bitches that can fuck right off.🤷‍♀️

spankyourkopita · 2021-09-04T13:45:00+00:00

What does this have to do with redpill?

ZacKaizen · 2021-09-04T23:15:46+00:00

When you hear that, you have to look at where they are basing the information. Most of the time, it is based on data analytics coming from Tinder, Bumble, or Hinge, which will give it a rather skewed data set to start with.

gorwellkov · 2021-09-04T16:11:54+00:00

I don’t think the people in the comments understand this issue, you’d have much better luck asking black women themselves.

Yes, there are people who would date black women, but society as a whole often has shamed black women and told them they are undesirable. There are many harmful and negative stereotypes about black women and yes, this does effect them in their dating lives.

KindKitten25055 · 2021-09-04T11:49:22+00:00

I personally have a celeb crush on Serena Williams. I don't know about the stats or anything but I doubt a black women would ever give me the time of day, especially because I'm a white guy.

Booda069 · 2021-09-05T06:21:48+00:00

The stats from dating apps/sites created that narrative. I tend to see different in person.

Results will differ by city. BW on the west coast specifically have a harder time than BW down south or the Midwest.

Aggressive-Complex79 · 2021-09-05T08:04:45+00:00

I sense a strong bias in OP. If you believe any of the stereotypes you listed, you should do some research especially on the ‘uneducated’ part.

Soft-Neat8117 · 2021-09-05T16:40:52+00:00

As a mixed race man who used to think black women were ugly, but overcame it, I think I have two cents to add in.

I used to be a self-hating racist largely due to being surrounded by racist rednecks growing up, though my abusive black father and Eurocentric media may have played a part too. I'd deny being part black even though it's obvious to anyone with a working pair of eyes. I'd tell racist jokes and so forth. I'm not proud of this, but it is what it is.

In addition, I didn't want to date black women. I thought they were ugly, masculine and low class. And the small minority of black women I did like were clearly biracial. There was a black girl I knew in middle school who I'm almost certain had a crush on me. But I didn't make a move because I didn't want to be seen with a black girl. And yet I wondered why I never had a girlfriend lol.

Some time after I graduated high school, I no longer had to see those hicks and started to think for myself. Realizing that A) These thoughts are harmful, both to myself and to others, and B) Since most people end up in relationships with partners who are similar to them, there's a good chance I'll end up with a woman who is at least partially black. So I might as well learn to like them. First I needed to figure out what exactly it was about black women that I didn't like. Was it the skin color? Not really. I mean, I didn't like a lot of really dark skinned black women at the time, but I've since discovered a few later on. What I disliked about them was mostly based on stereotypes portrayed by the media (black women were loud, obnoxious, un-feminine, always angry, trashy, domineering and often overweight with a manly face), as well as the horrible interactions I had with my dad's side of the family, who fit most of those stereotypes.

While there are some black women out there who do fit into those stereotypes, not all of them do and none of those stereotypes are exclusive to black women.

For example, I've met white women who were loud, bossy, obnoxious and un-feminine. My mother is one and she's white. Same with my aunt and a few who weren't family that I've known. Growing up in poor rural areas exposes you to a lot of trashy people and these areas are mostly populated by white people. Low class is low class regardless of ethnicity.

Same thing with weight. Most black women I've seen in person are obese and I remember hearing some statistic which said that 70% of African American women were overweight. Well, even if that were true, "overweight" is a vague term. It could range anywhere from one pound over the normal BMI to 600 pound life levels. The majority of Americans are overweight and most Americans aren't black. Almost everyone in my family is overweight, both on the white side and the black side (myself included).

It finally clicked. I don't like people who are ignorant, arrogant, and rude. Race has nothing to do with it. There are plenty of black women who are beautiful, kind, intelligent and so forth. The black girl who liked me in school didn't fit any of those stereotypes and I must say I was a fool for rejecting her and I regret it. I would gladly date a black woman now. Too bad I'm so repulsive now that no woman would have me.

Realpooop · 2021-09-06T02:51:25+00:00

Black chicks are hot af, u might just be gay

andrew-shovlin · 2021-09-18T19:48:43+00:00

Just came to see if the loud and angry and argumentative stereotype is true and read the comments if you were wondering too

Bluetinfoilhat · 2021-09-25T00:33:02+00:00

Most black women in the US only prefer to date black men, so being seen as the "bottom" of the totem poll by white, Asian, or other non black men doesn't bother most black women. The redpills obsession with black women lack of desirability is a defense mechanism. It burns them that a group they think should be desperate still is indifferent to them. Sort of how they hate fat women, but still expect thoe fat women to want or feel grateful towards them Ops post is transparent. Lol. This topic doesn't even have to do woth the Redpill, but the Redhill community is butt hurt that black women view them as a non factor.

Bluetinfoilhat · 2021-09-25T01:14:34+00:00

When black women complain about our dating problems it is that a lot of black men don't make enough money or don't want to commit. We are not complaining about not being seen as "desirable" by white or other men. Black women are not like Asian women, we don't put a lot of value in dating white men and we generally don't see them as "aspirational" or anything like that. Those who do date interracially simply don't think we are "dating up" because most prefer same race dating and ultimately a black family and children.

I don't know a single black woman who hasn't been hit on and pursed by men of all races(unless she was morbidly obese, and even then some men are into fat chicks). And before you bring up the "dating studies", those studies show black women get fewer responses in comparison to other races of women, -- black women still get more responses than the average men.

I feel like the redpill/manosphere gets off on believing there is a subset of women who are doing worse than them on dating (which makes them feel like they have the upper-hand with some women and are somehow "rejecting" them), and they are using black women to fill that category.

execute_the_plan · 2021-09-25T12:03:10+00:00

We don't want you, first of all. Secondly keep us out of your mouth cos we ain't checking for you

Title	Are black women really that undesirable?
Author	spankyourkopita
Upvotes	0
Comments	51
Date	September 4, 2021 10:30 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/php4hl/are_black_women_really_that_undesirable/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/are-black-women-really-that-undesirable.1066943 https://theredarchive.com/post/1066943