So, for my background. I am a 28 years old male, have autistic tendencies, although I am not autistic, 158 cm tall, mixed race caucasian-latino, an IQ in the 130-140 range and recently moved to a little Island in Europe to create a corporate structure for a family office that I just created.

I went down the entire rabbithole, starting with the Red Pill, moving over to the MGTOW-Stuff, and finally arrived at the black pill.

My professional life is really good, I work everyday and if I am not working, I am learning or creating art, go to the gym 4 times a week and am reasonably fit. Due to my technical expertise in IT, I already earn 85€/hour, which nets me about 10,000-15,000€ a month after taxes due to the fair tax code on this island. Due to investing in crypto rather early and being active in DeFi, I also built up a portfolio which currently is worth around 400,000 USD, and creating a daily revenue stream of 150-300 USD.

So. All in all, nothing to be depressed about. I have never been an outsider, and have a lot of friends back in my home country, but I have never been that much of an insider either. I have always had very radical views on politics, finance and programming styles, to the extend, that it even caused some friendships to end. Which turned me to despise society and their implementation of political concepts even more.

My Red Pill journey started before the lockdown hit, but after the lockdown came, I totally obsessed with it, learning about "Female Nature" and so on. Being on the autistic side, I finally had a guide, which was able to guide me through female interaction, and was getting results, I knew what to say to seduce them, but never created enough of a comfortable environment, to be able to get a meaningful connection. The problem is, that I cannot sense the feelings of another person, and I need to follow a manual, that explains human nature to me to the letter. A lot of the times, I only realize after seeing tears etc., that something I said, offended them.

I really want to find a SO, with whom my values align, but I don't seem to be able to "create the tingles". I greatly value intelligence, and would like to meet someone, who is able to teach me something, especially in the emotional department, who is also able to teach me about stuff (for example Natural Sciences).

But how do I go on about it? My entire weeks are full. I wake up on 6:30 in the morning, start working at 7:00, work until 11:00 or 12:00, do an hour pause, and then keep working until 16-18:00, then I mostly hit the gym and also do about 1-3 hours of crypto research or do work related to my family office. I also outsourced most of my housework to cleaning services, but I can't seem to fit more time in. I am free from my duties at around 10 p.m.

Online Dating doesn't work for me, due to my short statue. In the last four months I got two matches and both never replied to me, even though I swiped positive on anyone and everyone.

For my physical urges, I switched to using Escort Services, because they aren't a hassle, and the time slots are plannable, I know what I get and even formed a friendship / very friendly "business" relationship with one escort.

I don't even know why I am posting here, because all I ever wanted was a stable loving relationship and not this toxic bullshit that came along with it. I guess its an outcry for help? Overall, I am pretty content with my life, having just acquired an object near the Marina, which is something I dreamt of as a kid. My next dream is going to Space and acquiring enough financial resources to be able to do that. (Not Elon Style, just enough to be able to buy a ticket)

I wish I would understand humans more, or humans worked in a more computer like fashion, as an Input-Output-Machine, that I could understand.

Thank you, for reading through my story.