I think I know why I want a virgin girlfriend

Red_Trapezoid · 2020-08-16T19:10:47+00:00

This is a really naive and fairytale view of young love though. The fantasy young people have in their heads of their first love is so idealized it’s just not reality. Looking back, you know what I remember from a lot of the relationships I saw around me? A lot of straight up abuse. It’s not unusual for teenagers to be sociopathic, short-sighted, selfish assholes so why would anybody think these people would have some kind of perfect anime rom-com relationship? Get real. Forget about the young love that you “lost”. Lmao you didn’t lose anything.

AlissonHarlan · 2020-08-16T19:33:23+00:00

sir, you're dreaming about an idea that doesn't exist in real life.

You have an ideal about how your teenage years should have been, regarding of song and movies, and that's not what the majority of teenager experiments.

Also now you're 21, you'll never be the same than you were at 14, or 16. even if you do it with a virgin. You will not forget about school/work/debt because your GF is a virgin.

You can not get this time back, and you cannot live the typical teenager years like we see in the movie again. (that said you're allowed to want a virgin GF, but in my opinion you want that for some bad reason, and you will probably be disapointed)

sg183 · 2020-08-16T19:23:25+00:00

OP, it is 100% comparing to past experiences.

Teenagers date/fall in love with people they didn't lose their virginities to, all the time. Teenagers are dumb, impulsive, and pretty quick to fall in love. The intensity doesn't make it more valuable. Many of them don't experience movie-drama level love.

I didn't.

If you want a virgin, instead of someone experienced, and you are a self-proclaimed incel or follow TRP, it is about control.

You are trying to control the outcome of a situation by wanting a virgin. Virgins are bound to be naive, younger, easier to manipulate. It is about wanting them to bond with you emotionally rather than the alternative, being that the girl is able to more easily compartmentalize the experience/move on, if she wants.

This is manipulation.

Not love.

Also, everyone fucking sees what you guys write about non-virgin women. That they get loose, hit a "wall" (as if most older men don't look like Rush Limbaugh). You attach sexual marketplace value to women, and that value ends with the 'loss' of virginity.

It's about being special all right.

So special that the girl just doesn't know any better, and you get to "break her in". You get to "change" her. As if a penis permanently alters a vagina upon entry.

Edit: Your post on r/seduction says it all:

I don't want to be with a girl when some other guy fucked her first

settling for me instead of being the guy she gives easy sex

Yeah you're a real romantic, lol

Stargazer1919 · 2020-08-16T19:03:51+00:00

I can kind of guess why men have often wanted virgin women for millennia now:

They want to leave their mark on her. If they are her first, she won't forget him. She definitely has not had children before. She's most likely younger, and older women can have trouble bearing children. Maybe they think she's more likely to stay in his life. The younger she is, the more naive she is. It makes him feel important if he gets to show her the ropes.

This is all nonsense.

You'll meet many people in your life who leave an impression on your life. You don't even have to fuck them for that to happen. A woman can be childfree and happy in life. A woman can probably care for children better if she waits until she's ready as an adult, and is prepared for it. If a guy needs a virgin woman to make him feel like a man, then his ego is fragile and it's sad that he can't find other sources of fulfillment.

Most importantly, women are completely capable of making their own decisions just as much as men are. (As long as both groups are mature enough to do so, and that generally comes with age.)

Hellion_shark · 2020-08-16T19:21:17+00:00

Cool, but you know how few people experience this?
Of all, ALLL the people I know IRL I was the only one who lost my verginity to a virgin partner.
And what does it matter? We dumped each other a few months after.
This isn't a realistic view of relationships, really. If a woman knows what she wants she can give you a much better first-time experience, and if you don't know what you are doing you can give a virgin girl a really horrible experience. And vice versa.
You cannot return the past. And virginity is just some arbitrary bullshit made by religions.

vial_of_music · 2020-08-16T21:15:47+00:00

this is not healthy at all. it’s a movie and song for a reason. it’s not real

callmejay · 2020-08-16T21:33:02+00:00

Imagine if you'd never had a friend in your whole life. You regret missing out on that "best friend" experience that young people often have, so you insist on only making friends with other people who have never had friends. Otherwise it won't be as special.

Does that make sense to you?

Inareskai · 2020-08-16T20:48:04+00:00

How do you know it wouldn't be the same? You've decided that based on idea of how things 'should' be, but you've not experienced that, so how do you know no experience can beat it unless the person you're with is also a virgin?

Having had sex with a whole two people, one time when we were both virgins and one time when they were and I was not. I still had all the butterflies and happy feelings and falling in love moments the second time, I was just also older and less angst-y. Overall, second relationship was way better despite it not being my 'first' love. Having had the experience you seem to think of with rose tinted glasses, meh. It wasn't that amazing. There are definitely many other amazing experiences that you're 100% missing out on because you're chasing this one.

VioletV44 · 2020-08-17T00:43:43+00:00

Sometimes I think we're our own worst enemies and can self-sabotage. You limit the options out there drastically by expecting a virgin and could miss out on an amazing person because of this rigid requirement. I understand where you're coming from to a degree that you'd rather have someone with the same level of experience, but your reasoning of it being like some sort of Rom-Com is inaccurate. For the majority of people it's not even close to this experience, but you wouldn't know that because you didn't experience it back then. Take it from those of us with experience... young love isn't really love more often than not, it's just idealized. It's kids with hormones having strong feelings for the first time, but don't understand what it really means to love another person because they are so young, and usually they just end up being selfish and naive so they can't actually have a "real" relationship with a person where it takes compromise, commitment, communication, and holding space for one another, not just sex and unrealistic standards of romance. And because they're so young they feel they're still missing out on something so more often than not they go seek out another relationship with someone else that falls apart as well because it's all for the wrong reasons. They can't even accept the person for who they are flaws and all, and the fact you think a virgin is all you need shows that you may not even be considering the complexity of another human being. A lot of adult relationships even fall apart for this reason. Many people get into relationships simply because of loneliness, and feeling like they need to reach that milestone in life, but don't actually know what it takes to have a successful one.

BeingNTisEverything · 2020-08-16T19:41:34+00:00

I want a virgin girlfriend just because I'm a virgin myself.

It's as simple as that.

^and ^anyone ^who ^suggests ^otherwise ^is ^saying ^that ^virgin ^women ^have ^higher ^value ^than ^virgin ^men ^- ^therefore ^reinforcing ^TRP ^principles

sg183 · 2020-08-16T18:38:26+00:00

[deleted]

Reyeactable · 2020-08-16T19:39:36+00:00

Yeah this is true Had some young love and it was meh but I'm grateful for the experience , if I never had it I would also idolize it and search for it

Like many people pointed out it it's out of your reach now and you will never get a semblance of it , not even having a virgin girlfriend will give it to you

But as someone that also had low experience sexually and romantically search for someone with also low experience as you those where my best relationships

Gackt · 2020-08-16T21:36:03+00:00

Don't listen to the naysayers.

You can get what you want but I don't know how common it is.

Difference is I'm still red pilled so I tread cautiously.

I'm an ex-incel, virgin at 27, found a 18yr old virgin.

Yes I'm in a LTR with a virgin who loves me.

No she's not smoking hot, temper your expectations, hot or lovely pick one.

Warning though, I popped a second cherry, she gets a dick appointment from time to time. And this girl isn't even really into me (yet let me pop it) and an LTR would have never and will never come out of it.

Title	I think I know why I want a virgin girlfriend
Author	No-Situation849
Upvotes	34
Comments	43
Date	August 16, 2020 5:42 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/iawox4/i_think_i_know_why_i_want_a_virgin_girlfriend/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/i-think-i-know-why-i-want-a-virgin-girlfriend.67260 https://theredarchive.com/post/67260