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And I'd rather shit in my hands and then clap than be in the same room as a dude like this.

September 23, 2020
2961 upvotes
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Post Information
Title And I'd rather shit in my hands and then clap than be in the same room as a dude like this.
Author basedbecky
Upvotes 2961
Comments 109
Date September 23, 2020 11:34 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/and-id-rather-shit-in-my-hands-and-then-clap-than.269329
https://theredarchive.com/post/269329
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/iylxb4/and_id_rather_shit_in_my_hands_and_then_clap_than/
Comments

[–]verusckaFDS Disciple322 points323 points  (16 children) | Copy Link

Why are they so allergic to the word “relationship”?

[–]Rough-TreeFDS Newbie221 points222 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

They don't want responsibility for a woman's feelings.

[–]2340000Ruthless Strategist147 points148 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

They'll never take responsibility. Men like him abuse early. So when his abuse goes from 2 to 20, he'll be able to gaslight her easier with "it was never a relationship".

[–]SorryChefFDS Newbie72 points73 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

ah yes, schroedinger's relationship. simultaneously "you're crazy if you think this is what a relationship is!" and "this relationship..."/"my girl[friend]"/"i love[d] you!", depending on the needs of his argument for that day.

[–]fetchingmorbidFDS Newbie21 points22 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Which works in tandem with schrodinger's dick.

Granted, I stuck my dick inside you multiple times, but there's a burger king down the road.. and you're too clingy to be my sperm receptical but not savy enough to understand the nuances of condiments I smother on my onion ring order.

Then he'll throw some shit in air quotes and pontificate on why bitches just don't "get it".

[–]LueclesteFDS Newbie7 points8 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

He may as well stick his dick in the burger and save everyone a lot of time.

[–]ayhtdws1989FDS Newbie3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

lololol poor burger

[–]LueclesteFDS Newbie1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah.... by that point it’d be crying to just be eaten and get it over with already.

[–]hail_galaxar0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

That is such a perfect way to describe it.

[–]InayahDaneenFDS Newbie37 points38 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Because she’s not the girl of his dreams, she’s Barbara The Builder.

[–]Lavender_flowFDS Disciple38 points39 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

because he needs to justify fucking other women all the time

[–]mostdefinitelyntursFDS Newbie5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It means responsibility 🙄

[–]FDSxMuffinVSrat262 points263 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

It's puzzled me until right this second why men want relationships without calling them relationships.

They don't want to have to be loyal.

It puts them in a no-lose situation - if they can't find anyone else and they eventually settle for a relationship with you, then they get points for being loyal all along. But if they do find someone else, they have plausible deniability that it wasn't a relationship so they're not a bad guy for sleeping with or entering a relationship with someone else.

I've never had an issue with a guy not wanting to commit but I see it's a trend especially online.

This is why FDS is great. I didn't have to make this mistake myself and waste months or years learning the hard way. When a guy says he doesn't want a relationship and acts like he does, it means he's not a loyal person.

[–]smaller_angFDS Newbie52 points53 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

YEP. But they want to know the girl is always there for them 🙄

[–]galian84FDS Apprentice12 points13 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I wish I had read this before my last ex...he was happy to date and sleep with me for a good 5 months before finally calling me his girlfriend. Seemed reluctant to even say we were exclusive.. And it still never actually felt like a relationship.

He was definitely talking to other women while we were dating. My guess is it didn't work out with them, so he settled for me.

[–]hail_galaxar5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I don’t know if he “settled” for you if he liked you the most. He just has some weird excuse to not date one person at a time.

[–]galian84FDS Apprentice4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Quite possibly, I'm sure I was the woman he liked most at the time. I did catch him talking to other women even after I was his girlfriend, and when he described the ideal woman he wanted to marry, it most definitely did not describe me. Plus, he seemed like he was determined to keep me at arms length for the year we were together :/

[–]hail_galaxar2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Oh. So he wanted a friend with benefits but knew you wouldn’t put up with that shit, so he gave you a girlfriend title.

[–]InayahDaneenFDS Newbie12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This 💯

[–]AnniaTFDS Disciple12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Which is why words and actions need to come together. Some people might think that it's just the actions that count. Others that it's the word. But we need the 2 of them. A man might act like he's our boyfriend and do all the boyfriend things but if he hasn't explicitly stated that it's a committed relationship, sadly we can never assume.

Some people still think that casual relationships/fwb are just the guy hitting and quitting, just having sex and nothing more. But some men will take you on dates, hold your hand in public, make plans with you, be jealous of other men, have sex and all that and then be shook when you thought you were in a relationship or be all "I don't know yet, I'm not ready for a relationship" when you want to confirm what you two have. It's ridiculous.

[–]BasieSkanksRuthless Strategist2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You've nailed it.

[–]chateauduchatFDS Newbie524 points525 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

So homeboy want a girl in a relationship with him but him not with her.

Ok good luck with that 🤮

[–]DatonecatladyuknoFDS Apprentice81 points82 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Exactly

[–]InayahDaneenFDS Newbie50 points51 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Sadly there’s pickmeisha’s out there groveling for such lvm’s 🤢

[–]jenneschguetFDS Newbie34 points35 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

More likely, the woman will think she’s in a relationship (shocker, because it is one) and then he’ll drop the “I’m not ready” line and break her heart...

[–]MiaNaimFDS Newbie35 points36 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

There's a post on r/blackpeopletwitter where a girl posted she'd been dating a guy for seven months and he asked her why she doesn't have a boyfriend.

[–]traumatizedadultFDS Newbie8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It was also posted on this sub, I feel sad for her!!

[–]SarcasmSlideFDS Disciple142 points143 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

A woman I’m not afraid to lose because I know they’ll always be there.

It’s this right here for me. Ladies, they often tell you. And when they do, it’s in plain language.

[–]Inspection-CriticalFDS Apprentice1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Sadly, some desperate women will read that and still pursue him.

[–]-pop-fizz-clinkFDS Newbie0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yep. I have had someone try to explain their cheating on me by using this logic..."she's a sure thing". Yikes.

[–]lollykpopsFDS Newbie347 points348 points  (14 children) | Copy Link

Scrotelation: give me a bangmaid but make her love me, no strings attached.

[–]RabidWenchFDS Apprentice135 points136 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

Never fear, we all speak Scrotish around here. 😂

[–]AdawritesrulesFDS Disciple106 points107 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

I’ll take you to a field I know and we can talk about this there

[–]RabidWenchFDS Apprentice54 points55 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

💀 I feel weirdly privileged that I saw that when it was posted. My immediate reaction was "okay, Zodiac, slow down" 😂

[–][deleted] 30 points31 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

LOL that field dude. It’s the same guy.

[–]fetchingmorbidFDS Newbie20 points21 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Field dick energy.༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ

[–]Silverpool201823 points24 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I swear, it's a whole another language in itself. Like Klingon, or Dothraki... We have Scrotish. Lol

[–]RabidWenchFDS Apprentice9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I feel like there should be an expedition to an exotic land to balance out the research I've had to do here at home. At least Greek and Egyptian are interesting. 😂

[–]ThatGirl60FDS Newbie19 points20 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Ladies, I’m dying 😂😂😂😂

[–]CassieGreen85FDS Disciple91 points92 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

She also has to contribute to my mortgage, groceries and bills, but she ain't having her name in ANY of my properties/bank accounts.

[–]SpaceC4seFDS Newbie35 points36 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

They somehow find ALL of the audacity. Without fail

[–]TriniGoldFDS Newbie10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

but when she gets upset when I leave her for another woman, she's the psycho because I told her this isn't a relationship, so her emotions are her own fault and has nothing to do with me or my actions

[–]MagnfiqueMaleficentFDS Disciple182 points183 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

He wants a desperate pickme who’ll never leave him so he can feel free to cheat on her, lie to her, and use her.

What woman would agree to be someone in a relationship who he’s not afraid to lose? He’s just advertising that he won’t respect you.

[–]Eat_Pant_b0ssFDS Newbie73 points74 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Your title fucking sent me 🤣

[–]BorderszFDS Newbie77 points78 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I know not many people follow Bow-wow because he's washed up and a has been. But recently there was a leak of audio of him indirectly admitting to physically abusing his ex-gf (he punched her in the stomach while she was pregnant) and he cheated on her. He is scum

[–]CarmelPeachFDS Newbie37 points38 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Are you serious? That’s awful

[–]BorderszFDS Newbie47 points48 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yup. The audio leak was a conversation he had with his ex-girlfriend, Kiyomi Leslie. and the convo was hard to listen to. Here is a YT video of an abridged version (4 min) of the leak. He is holding her hostage, told her she has to fist fight him to leave and threatens to burn her. She also said, "you promised you wouldn't hit me again".

And the way he talks to her is like he is trying to fight a grown man on a street. Just despicable. I never paid attention to him but I was honestly stunned when all of this surfaced 2 weeks ago. The guy is a psychopath esp. writing a post like that making himself a victim when he is a full blown abuser.

[–]hikurangi2019FDS Apprentice70 points71 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

Sounds like most men :/

[–]CloacaDiddlerFDS Disciple86 points87 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

Why does it always swing between this or “I’m searching for a serious relationship so I can ask about kids on the first date, propose on the second, and then trap you in a house with unequal labor so that when I start cheating and withholding money you can’t do anything about it”

[–]smaller_angFDS Newbie10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The 2 pillars of how to trap a woman

[–]pao664FDS Newbie56 points57 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

He wants a FWB but with all the benefits of wifey. Fuck that.

[–]youdipthongFDS Newbie51 points52 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Courtney knows what’s up

[–]TheMissInformedFDS Newbie34 points35 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

For real, somebody send Courtney the link to FDS real quick. She belongs with us

[–]humblerat7744 points45 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Shredded vegetable medley - using that for now on for everything.

[–][deleted] 48 points49 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Did they know they actually CAN leave a relationship if it doesn't work? Like chill, it's not a death sentence.

[–]SpaceC4seFDS Newbie58 points59 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Men are so dramatic 😞 Meanwhile, trying to leave a relationship with the wrong guy does indeed turn out to be a death sentence for women all too often.

[–]LadyGrimesFDS Disciple33 points34 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

LOL @ that response

[–]werker115FDS Newbie18 points19 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

So clever lol

[–]favoritesoundFDS Newbie29 points30 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I just want to ask this guy what the difference is between a partnership and a relationship is. And just watch him struggle.

[–]SpaceC4seFDS Newbie29 points30 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

"I don't want a relationship!"

That's a lot of words to say that you want every last bit of time, effort, and emotional expenditure from a woman you're not willing to be sexually exclusive with. Nah is right

[–]theawkwardalliFDS Newbie23 points24 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Certified Scrotationship right there

[–]jayohday20 points21 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

His photo fits his description of self; all too well. I’ll give him snaps for that.

[–]CarmelPeachFDS Newbie16 points17 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

These are the same guys who get mad if the girl sleeps around just like him lmao

[–]gcthrowaway2019FDS Apprentice14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lil' Bow Wow still trying it...isn't he behind in his child support?

[–]cryptohoboFDS Newbie13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I don’t even think he understands what he’s trying to distinguish here, other than he’s a very confused scrote.

[–]hypointellectualFDS Newbie35 points36 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

This is my LVM friend 🤢🤮

[–]notallowed2havepizzaFDS Newbie43 points44 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Time to unfriend that loser. He sounds like an enemy of every woman alive.

[–]voodo2020FDS Newbie40 points41 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

He doesn’t have any money to buy whores lol so he’s looking for a free bangmaid! Good luck on thay

[–]Lavender_flowFDS Disciple11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

He really thought he did something there... These low IQ scrotes are the freaking worst. It is like, oh so original a man who doesn't want to commit, but wants all the benefits of a relationship. 🥴 These kind of guys have pickme's trying to over-commit to get picked and will make him a plate every evening and all that shit, but in the end he is just going to keep cheating. What a treat.

[–]Charlo4FDS Newbie6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

We knew Lil Bow Wow lost his mind a loooooong time ago. Not surprised

[–]pipeuptopipedownFDS Newbie6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

At least he starts the semantic games right off the bat, so you can swipe him away and keep it moving.

[–]Diane9779FDS Newbie5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I really hope those two started dating

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

That clap back has me rolling 🥗🥗🥗

[–]NovemberinthechairFDS Disciple6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

He wants a servant...who doesn't mind being treated like shit and cheated on. Thanks for admitting it, fella.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The "I don't want a relationship" means "yeah I will treat you like a gf but since we are not official I will ditch like trash anytime"

[–]OityouthereFDS Newbie6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

"I don't want a salad..but I'll take a shredded vegetable medley"

OMG- this so perfectly fits so many of my LVM out there! I'm gonna use that line now in loads of things

[–]sunbathingpugFDS Newbie6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Imagine doing all this for him, thinking you're the one for him but he just has to realise it, hoping for that ring daily, and he ends up cheating on you. When you get upset with him, he tells you "we weren't in a relationship anyway".

I honestly feel for women who go through this to prove themselves to be worthy. I hope they'll see the light one day and realise that they're the prize and not these men.

[–]LittleBiitchyBananaFDS Newbie6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

“A woman I’m not afraid to lose because I know they’ll always be there”

He is looking for Labrador. 🐶🤷‍♀️

[–]legalheartbreakerFDS Newbie4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Why are men always afraid of commitment?

[–]bitch_not_itFDS Newbie3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is the same greedy low effort stupidly slimy mentality of companies trying to act like "the experience" of an internship is just as valuable, "if not MORE," as getting paid for all the work they're planning to squeeze out of you

[–]BasieSkanksRuthless Strategist5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This guy's sentiments is very common, though. And it's why FDS is needed so badly.

[–]localgirlcultFDS Apprentice4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

He wants to "build" with her😆 What? A sandcastle? Cause that's all you're gonna get if you don't wanna seriously commit to a real relationship. He wants to "build" lmao. Get your Lego out, that's all you're good for.

Also, I can't believe I used to be attracted to this guy. Really hiding some shit under that face. The epitome of no value man.

[–]smartierthanthouFDS Newbie4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm a small business owner! I want to own my own business and go to conventions and make lots of money. I don't want to file LLC paperwork or make a business plan or take out a loan for capital. I don't have any contacts or a network or skills. It's a partnership based on trust and growth, huge growth potential!

You show up in the morning, pay the taxes, rent and furnish our offices, bring your own computer and lunch, pay for benefits and unemployment insurance, build a network, design a prototype, create a supply line, market our services, handle the boring stuff like infrastructure and customer service and make the coffee.

I am a entrepreneur!

[–]MRgoudaonionspicklesFDS Newbie5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Bro, keep that same energy when she leaves your “partnership” for a real man with a nicer dick who wants to commit. “iT wAs nEvEr a rELaTiOnShIP”

[–]heleninthealpsFDS Apprentice3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lies men tell (eye rolling hard)

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

"having a woman I'm not afraid to lose because I know she will always be there" sounds like the psycho has plans on GPS tagging the woman he has chained to the radiator pipes.

[–]corago513FDS Newbie2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I thought lil bow wow was already canceled when he pretended to be flying on a private jet. Too bad all the rappers and music moguls that bright him up didn't teach him HVM qualities or even set him up for financial success.

[–]mymindmybrainFDS Newbie1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

That’s why I will dump low valued men in the trash can.

These low valued men have no respect for women

[–]wateryyvibesFDS Newbie1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Eww

[–]Shadekit1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

"A woman I'm not afraid to lose because I know she'll always be there."

That's really turning my stomach.

[–]spiritravelFDS Newbie1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The comments. Wish I had seen this sub with the dude I wasted my first five months of quarantine with lol glad to see I wasn’t crazy after all. Men like this really be gaslighting and manipulating even when they’re “honest” and telling you “they’re not ready because dealing with their issues” while treating you like a gf every time they see you 🙄

[–]Remarkable-Culture-8Throwaway Account2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Can we start spreading and focusing on more positive things here and HVM? I feel like we are constantly just getting bitter by focusing on LVM and it’s just not fun.

[–]hail_galaxar1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

But this one is hilarious. You can post a queen meme anytime you like. You could probably find a ton on Pinterest.

[–]ditanowThrowaway Account0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I saw this quoted in a OLD I was browsing....I wanted to message just to tell him off.

[–]WonkySwampMonkThrowaway Account0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I’m going to start using this expression hahahahahaha

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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