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Even a 35 yo man has these same meltdowns but they're the logical sex!!!

November 4, 2020
7587 upvotes
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Post Information
Title Even a 35 yo man has these same meltdowns but they're the logical sex!!!
Author _xyoungbellax_
Upvotes 7587
Comments 140
Date November 4, 2020 11:39 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/even-a-35-yo-man-has-these-same-meltdowns-but.733914
https://theredarchive.com/post/733914
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/jnv8vf/even_a_35_yo_man_has_these_same_meltdowns_but/
Comments

[–]Phoenix__Rising2018Ruthless Strategist[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (3 children) | Copy Link

As expected men are being extremely emotional in the notes. So funny they get auto blocked and no one will ever see their irrational emotionality. 🤷‍♀️

If a scrote screams in the notes and it's auto blocked, does it make a sound?

[–]Astral_weaverFDS Newbie263 points264 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

Hahaha, even the worst teenage angst tantrums by me and my sister were nothing compared with the tantrums my brothers threw at EVERYONE.

And guess who has their shit together emotionally even now in adulthood.

Not my brothers.

[–][deleted] 69 points70 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Same! Just the other day my brother threw a tantrum because I told him to flip his burger or It'll burn. He told me to not tell him what to do, as he flipped his burnt burger lol

[–]Phoenix__Rising2018Ruthless Strategist26 points27 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Is my brother your brother? Lol

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

🤭

[–]straighthairgreeceFDS Newbie52 points53 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Same! My brother used to punch walls or destroy his own stuff or others.

The worst my sister and I did was cry or leave the house lol.

[–]_xyoungbellax_FDS Apprentice[S] 442 points443 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

Most men stonewall their partners and family too. Go completely silent when they are being said to do basic things for the welfare of the relationship or the family. It's a form of withholding of emotions so that they don't have to communicate and keep acting like an infant who can't speak and ultimately the work has to be done by the partner or the respective family member. That's an emotional response too. If they were really the logical sex, they would not give the silent treatment and do things without having being told to repeatedly.

[–]eveninghopeFDS Apprentice148 points149 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Right exactly. Shutting down bc you don’t know how to process and communicate your emotions is not logical/rational.

[–]thehappiestelephantFDS Newbie119 points120 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Stonewalling isn't just immature, it's abusive. You're presenting yourself as a stone wall to the person trying to connect with you. Infants have died from that kind of lack of parental affect.

[–]lucearioFDS Newbie33 points34 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

My ex used to do this all of the time and I never had a name for it. Even when I told him I was leaving him and started packing my bags, he carried on tapping away on his computer game as if he didn’t hear a word I said. It really, really hurt me - more than if he’d gotten angry or upset back. He definitely knew that, though, and that’s why he did it.

[–]ferociouslycuriousFDS Newbie26 points27 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is my STBX. Pretending like he took the high road going along with me but was getting angrier inside all of the time for me not doing what he wanted. Which was secret, because he wouldn’t say. Also is still blaming me for things I have no control of because it’s more convenient than recognizing his own shortcomings. I’m happier with him gone. Soooooo much happier

[–]AdawritesrulesFDS Disciple16 points17 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

They shouldn’t have to be TOLD to do things. Why are so many men, nearly all men, like toddlers? Why can’t they just think act and speak like logical adults instead of petulant children with psychological problems?

[–]strcrssdvoyagerFDS Newbie931 points932 points  (27 children) | Copy Link

I tell people this all the time! Men are extremely emotional beings.

Punching a wall when your football team loses is an emotional response. Screaming at other drivers on the road is an emotional response. Throwing your video game controller at the television is an emotional response. Throwing a fit when someone asks you to clean is an emotional response.

[–]riricideFDS Apprentice167 points168 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

There is a difference between being emotional and being emotionally immature. My take is that punching walls and throwing a fit are signs of emotional immaturity i.e. not being in control of your emotions or expecting other people to take care of them for you. Whereas you can have a full emotional range and still be a rational person who expresses themselves well.

[–]thehappiestelephantFDS Newbie87 points88 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

There is a difference between being emotional and being emotionally immature

And that difference is ONLY in how you EXPRESS your emotions. It's perfectly fine to have them, but manage them like the adult you are.

[–]Ta7founaFDS Newbie4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Absolutely agree! You have to be in touch with your emotions and be able to express them in a healthy way in order to take rational decisions and handle things calmly.

[–][deleted] 46 points47 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Even LV males will see this as emotional, but they’ll just blame women for not keeping a man around the house to teach those emotional males how to not be emotional.

[–]yolosunshineFDS Newbie23 points24 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Ahem you mean teach those young males to be rational instead of the emotional disease they picked up from being around women.

Who aren’t punching walls but hey.

[–]yolosunshineFDS Newbie18 points19 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Also not asking for directions or stopping to consult the map.

You have GPS now. Siri is not trying to emasculate you.

[–]NovemberinthechairFDS Disciple467 points468 points  (44 children) | Copy Link

Why do people keep insisting that men are less emotional!? Jfc, how many mass shootings, wars and genocide do men have to initiate before this becomes fucking mythology?

[–]PasDeToutFDS Newbie176 points177 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

And strangling women to death ‘by accident’ in the middle of an argument?

[–]midnightmoonlight180FDS Newbie30 points31 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Crime of passion, please excuse

[–]thehappiestelephantFDS Newbie105 points106 points  (34 children) | Copy Link

Why do people keep insisting that men are less emotional!?

No periods

[–]sadocapitalist97 points98 points  (31 children) | Copy Link

I swear to fuck everyone thinks periods make every woman emotional but I get nada and neither does any woman I'm close enough to to ask. It's weird.

Edit: I didn't mean to invalidate anyone's experiences, I meant to say I find it weird that society expects it while it seems to affect a percentage of women rather than being a blanket statement.

[–]shortywannarockFDS Newbie75 points76 points  (13 children) | Copy Link

Most women don’t experience PMS or PMDS, but for some reason it’s become a meme. Most women do experience cramps and menstrual symptoms, but that’s not the same thing. Your body is producing prostaglandins and bradykinins (inflammatory signals) which cause you to feel sick and uncomfortable during menses; but being sick is not an emotional imbalance, it’s actually a very appropriate emotional response.

[–]ALocusInTheBiosphereFDS Newbie41 points42 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Exactly. The only emotions I feel is in response to the discomfort and pain of menstruation. Who doesn't irritable when they're in pain but expected to work all day? The only mood swings I ever had were during puberty when your hormone levels are all over the place and menstruation was worse. When I hit 20, there was a noticable difference in how I responded to bad situations. The knee jerk anxiety freak outs weren't as bad and became less and less common. Now it's damn near impossible to get me to have an explosive melt down and I rarely cry. Once those hormones level out and you train yourself how to handle your emotions in a healthy manner, it's a lot easier.

[–]sadocapitalist42 points43 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The pain thing is true. Women are expected to work through extreme pain but you know no man would.

[–]havingababypenguinFDS Newbie7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm started to balance later in life, but yes. This.

[–]Sea_SoilFDS Apprentice15 points16 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

I don't know about that.

Who gets PMS? As many as three in four women say they get PMS symptoms at some point in their lifetime. For most women, PMS symptoms are mild. Less than 5% of women of childbearing age get a more severe form of PMS, called premenstrual dysphoric disorder (PMDD).

This is from womenshealth.gov

[–]shortywannarockFDS Newbie10 points11 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

According to this meta-analysis the global average prevalence is under 50%, but it varies drastically depending on the country, which suggests it has something to do with external environmental factors, so it’s possible that in some places/times it is more common than others.

[–]Sea_SoilFDS Apprentice6 points7 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Interesting! Although, that's still half of women. So I wouldn't say "most" women don't experience PMS.

[–]shortywannarockFDS Newbie2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Not to get pedantic, but “most” means more than half, which is what this indicates, while “majority” means the largest subgroup, which would also apply.

[–]Phoenix__Rising2018Ruthless Strategist9 points10 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Typically PMS happens to teenagers and young women. And then it drops.

[–]Sea_SoilFDS Apprentice4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Am I crazy/wierd then for being 25 and still having it? I actually didn't get it when I was a teen because I was on HBC.

[–]eveninghopeFDS Apprentice6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Nah girl. I'm mid 30s and I still get CRAZY mood swings.

[–]Phoenix__Rising2018Ruthless Strategist7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I don't know. All I know is it decreases significantly as women's bodies mature into adulthood.

[–]faux_naturaleFDS Newbie15 points16 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

My periods actually do drive me crazy, but I STILL manage not to throw a tantrum, because it’s my job to regulate my own emotional responses. Because, you know, adult person!

If I can refrain from Hulking out while bleeding profusely and dealing with stabbing pains all over my body, surely men can pull it together when they’re mildly inconvenienced.

[–]SayNadFDS Newbie27 points28 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Sissss, my period and non-period days are literally the same since the first time I got them - I just have shark days where I want to eat everything. That's it. A lot of girls I know also have a normal state of emotion on their periods, just 2 girls have more back pain and all they asked for is a back massage.

The way some scrotes describe women having psychotic breakdown whenever they are on periods just make me think "What did you do to cause that". Men be thinking making fun of women in pain is "funny" and their justified anger as "women being hella crazy in periods" just show how they literally gaslight every single little shit.

It is fucking bullshit.

[–]sadocapitalist16 points17 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Yup. Unless the woman has serious issues, the likely occurance if she's acting batshit is the guy is being a prick. I because so much more stable after dumping every male (other than my dad) out of my life and starting fresh, I had some insane friends honestly teenage me was such a pickme 😂

[–]SayNadFDS Newbie20 points21 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

It takes a lot for normal women to get aggressive and lashing out at people, and usually it is due to her being in serious pain (like giving birth).

It only takes a little for a lot of men to start being aggressive and lashing out on people - like accidentally bumping their shoulder.

But sure, we are the "emotional" one. Pffft.

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I do feel my mood would get altered by my period. I would get a bit of brain fog and find it harder to cope with frustrations. For about a day. I started taking magnesium and most of those symptoms are gone. Still get mild cramping and fatigue.

Experiencing this doesn’t mean you give into it and act “crazy” though. It means you don’t feel well and are aware of that and give yourself a break. People seem to confuse having emotions and lack of rationality to sort them and interpret them.

But I’m also not a fan of women with internalized misogyny acting like this stuff isn’t real because they don’t experience it. It subtly infers that other women are making this up (I’ve actually seen that accusation). Or they also refer to it as being “crazy” when instead it’s a fairly reasonable way to act when you don’t feel well and your hormones are shifting.

Also men DO have cycles and hormonal shifts. It’s my understanding it’s DAILY for them whereas for women it’s monthly.

[–]sadocapitalist8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I didn't mean to imply it wasn't real, I'm sorry about that! I'm mildly autistic so everything comes out very blunt but I do believe that it affects some women.

Plus I am a bit unstable all the time, I'm pretty good at controlling my emotions these days though.

[–]LevelTurbulentFDS Newbie39 points40 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I do. I find myself crying in the shower usually right before it starts and I usually think why am I crying?! And then I’m like goddamnit. And when the pain gets real bad I get cranky but no worse or different than if I have a toothache or any other kind of pain.

And that’s from someone who has PMS, who also has an autoimmune disease that probably makes it worse and has been given narcotics by doctors to function through the pain at times and is looking at a hysterectomy to stop it all. And that’s as emotional as I get. No punching walls or throwing things or any of the crap men do when they get emotional.

[–]buzzkillyallFDS Newbie23 points24 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

That was me, too. Weepy a day or two before, then all focus was on dealing with the pain. I do not miss it. Bring on the wrinkles and gray hair, thanks very much, it's a fair trade-off in my book.

[–]Phoenix__Rising2018Ruthless Strategist1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

A hysterectomy isn't going to stop you from having PMS. Removing your ovaries would. But it will also put you into early menopause.

[–]LevelTurbulentFDS Newbie1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

My doctor has told me it will help with the pain. I don’t just have pms, I already said there’s a lot of pain involved as well.

And I don’t give a fuck about going into menopause. I’d like it to stop.

[–]thehappiestelephantFDS Newbie41 points42 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I've only known one person in my entire life that had PMS (honestly it was probably something more serious but we all know the medical research is nonexistent on women's health) and that was a coworker. I've never had friends, roommates, relatives, etc where they had noticeable mood swings except for that ONE coworker. It's definitely played up to invalidate legitimate issues.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's not even like women get worked up over nothing on their periods, it's more like we're in so much pain and have hormones flying all over the place that we tolerate bullshit less and are less patient with stupidity. If you're nice to a woman on her period chances are she'll be nice back or just kind of be distant, but she won't be outright rude unless you provoke her. Its like my mom says, don't poke the fucking bear if you don't want it become aggressive.

[–]99powerFDS Apprentice8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Same! I feel like an alien because I have no mental symptoms. the physical symptoms more than make up for it though

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

🎯

[–]sorrywhatttAt-Risk Pick Me Youth21 points22 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

I’ve just realised that’s gaslighting isn’t it!! We observe bad things happening irl but are told they are calm! Have I nailed it? Is this gaslighting? Lol 😂 I get confused by the definition lately because everything seems to be labelled gaslighting but I believe this counts?

[–]discomfortisgrowth5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

yes it is!

[–]sorrywhatttAt-Risk Pick Me Youth5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Woohoo! I’m getting it 😂

[–]GertrudethecuriousFDS Newbie3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

It comes from a 1938 play and two films where a husband was trying to make his wife think she was going mad. He turned down the gas lamps so the room got dimmer but denied to her that the room was darker. It's a great thriller!

https://en.www.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gaslight_(1944_film) Won Oscars I think.

[–]sorrywhatttAt-Risk Pick Me Youth2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Yeah I have heard of that! I just struggle to recognise or apply the term to real life sometimes

[–]GertrudethecuriousFDS Newbie3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

In summary, liar liar pants on fire :)

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The Patriarchy

[–]PessimisticAnaFDS Newbie127 points128 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Anger is an emotion.

When a man displays it they're seen as logical.

But when a woman does we're called over emotional

[–]thehappiestelephantFDS Newbie51 points52 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Yes dear, men have ReASoNs for their anger. We do not. /s

[–]KristeninmyskinFDS Apprentice31 points32 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Quiet, MeN are talking! /s

[–]warinmymind94FDS Apprentice19 points20 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Women usually will express anger by yelling, turning it in on herself, or crying out of frustration. Or will call friends and vent to blow off the steam. I also find Journaling to be helpful. Men though get angry and they tend to become physically violent, throwing things, making threats, and punching holes or driving recklessly. A man's anger is a violent tantrum that can put us in serious danger!

[–][deleted] 262 points263 points  (14 children) | Copy Link

Yea I hate it when men say they are more rational. I mean have you seen them watching football or sports. They literally get into fight or scream over some sports team.

[–]_xyoungbellax_FDS Apprentice[S] 154 points155 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

Yes, I have seen this. They get so aggressive. It's like I'm seeing someone else instead of their usual self. They'll flip over the table, throw the bowl of popcorn, punch their own thighs, scream profanities. When they're on the field, they'll push, slap the teammates etc. While playing video games also, they do the same thing. You can hear them screaming so loudly. Then we're called emotional for crying because of menstrual pain. Huh.

[–]Silverpool201886 points87 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Yup. There's a limit to screaming at television. I get the enthusiasm as a cricket fan myself, but there's a difference between celebration and cursing. Also, people should have the sense to curb their banshee screaming when at home. Save it for when you're at a stadium.

I told my ex to keep it down while I was reading in the same room and he had the audacity to tell me to shut up because he loves football and can't stand his team losing.

If that is the reaction to someone requesting you to lower your tantrums directed at a TV, then I dont know how you're not an irrational, emotional dick.

[–]_xyoungbellax_FDS Apprentice[S] 26 points27 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I'm guessing you're an Indian just like me. Since IPL is going on and my favourite team KKR got knocked out of the playoffs because of yesterday's game, I got sad, yes. But my male counterparts started throwing tantrums, went to MI's official social handles and posted harassing messages. Like what? It was our bad luck. Maybe the match was fixed, maybe not. But let's all learn to control our emotions. I swear they were shouting in person, I am hundred percent sure about this.

[–]Silverpool201812 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I am. Oh the collective male meltdown over IPL matches 🙈

[–]thehappiestelephantFDS Newbie35 points36 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

There's been some weird cultural push to have anger rebranded as "passion." No, "passion" doesn't exist on it's own, you have to be passionate about something.

Also the definition for passionate says it's a "barely controlled emotion." Passion is not necessarily what we should aspire to without the requisite self control to manage your actions.

[–]sexxxybaePickmeisha™️8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Passion is in bed, it's feeling for something creative or something one does, their work, their hobbies etc. Anger is not passion. Anger is natural but expressing it in an abusive way is nott

[–]sexxxybaePickmeisha™️2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I can't understand watching stuff that makes you so stressed out. I like trash tv at times, but it doesn't make me crazy or angry. It is entertaining to me. Some people watch stuff and get so angry it annoys me tho if I am around it. It's like, don't get so attached to it or don't watch it! Exceptions are movies that make u cry because that's just having a heart lol.

[–]ninetiesbaby16FDS Apprentice0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

This sounds crazy but men actually ENJOY being angry, like getting worked up in a rage is a pleasurable feeling to them. So many men have told me this. It’s to do with testosterone.

[–]sexxxybaePickmeisha™️0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I know this older guy who used to be this way and he talked to someone about it and figured it out. He no longer has these issues, but he is deeply religious and believes in something else, most men won't change. He told me that when he was angry there was adrenaline rushing, it made him feel strong. I think it goes for women who have anger issues too. It gives energy. Eventually he worked on this and is no longer this way. It makes them feel powerful. Now I think some people are more at home with anger than others, it doesn't necessarily make them bad people, it's just how their body works. And it's something to work on so they don't hurt those they care about. Personally when I'm mad I get exhausted, so I know it's not something natural for me. I think it takes a big person to learn that for themselves and still work on it even though it was bringing them some positive results.

[–]perumbulaFDS Newbie17 points18 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

This is why my husband chooses not to watch live sports very often. He hates the way it makes him feel. He says it's not good to feel so much negative emotion over something that doesn't matter at all. He's right. It's ridiculous.

[–]yolosunshineFDS Newbie9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I select for men who have zero watching-sports interest.

Their competitive spirit and interest in following events and team building turns out to be just as intact and far more intelligently expended.

[–]RavenWudgieRose2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Even in esports, my brother was literally making a loud fucking tantrum over a goddamn vidyah game! Like, calm down, nobody's even getting injured here.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yea lol.

[–]just-peepin-at-uFDS Newbie87 points88 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Maybe it is because what men say and do is acknowledged with more legitimacy from the get go, so their overly emotional responses are either pacified out of fear and exhaustion, or assumed to be logical? Like, men freak out, but society says their anger is justified, even if it isn’t.

Whereas women are punished for speaking up for ourselves and instantly told we are not logical whenever we don’t do what men want. It is the default if they are right, we are wrong.

So anytime we speak up, it is irrational because how dare we don’t do what those logical men want!

[–]thehappiestelephantFDS Newbie40 points41 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Spot on.

Men are validated from day one, women are invalidated from the same.

[–]BigDebbie4everFDS Newbie32 points33 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I also hate when we have to accept men's anecdotes or experience as FACTS but our experiences are up to interpretation.

[–]thowawaywookieFDS Newbie23 points24 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

A random guy's anecdote always trumps a woman's experience and education.

[–]ceramicunicornFDS Disciple10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

100% agree it is a cultural construct.

[–]shesacarver83 points84 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Ugh. My brother is crazy emotional and sensitive. He threw angry tantrums up until his twenties, and my parents never did anything about it. Meanwhile I was the calm one so if I ever got angry (even when it was justifiable) or argued with my parents, I got punished for it and sometimes even kicked out. I was the emotionally mature one so I was held to a much higher standard because I “knew better”. Well, maybe my brother would’ve known better too if my parents had actually fucking disciplined him.

Being a woman fucking sucks.

[–]thowawaywookieFDS Newbie36 points37 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It does. Being a lazy fuck up is tolerated in males.

Women have to be responsible at all times. School work, cleaning at home, babysitting siblings, working. Strong emotions are shut down.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Isn't that the truth, I got called out for being mad that my parents weren't doing anything about the physical threats my brother made to me and they acted like I was the angry one. It's like even the parents are scared of their sons, yet people think that having sons is easier. There are some violent daughters but it's not as common as stories of the son who punches walls when he's angry.

[–]Silverpool201883 points84 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Haha. I've heard while growing up that boys' teen years are tough on parents because they are troublesome and hyper..and girls are responsible and "emotionally mature".

Way to treat us as designated therapists from the day we're born.

[–]honcho713FDS Newbie40 points41 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Males go through an entire hormonal cycle EVERYDAY. Completely unpredictable.

[–]KAT_85FDS Newbie41 points42 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Most teenage boys I've known have gone through an angry outburst stage somewhere between 13 and 16-ish. My brother in law is very intelligent, an engineering PhD student, etc. I've known him since he was 10. Between those ages he would melt down and try to punch my husband (10 years older) if he was told that he had to conform to family expectations. Basically, only my husband and my father in law could get him to do anything. And by "get him to do anything," I mean some male person had to physically drag him out of bed for school, had to block his access to adult content on the home computer, had to make the computer shut down at a particular time so that he wasn't online until 2 AM on a school night... He's mostly grown out of that stage now that he's in his 20s, but it's laughable to say that only teenage girls have trouble learning to handle their newly-formed social/emotional/sexual consciousness. We just expect them to grow up sooner and to not express negative emotions publicly. Right or wrong, that level of self control takes longer to cultivate.

[–]eveninghopeFDS Apprentice38 points39 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

And boys get placated bc otherwise they throw violent fits so they turn into low EQ adults who don’t even realize they’re being emotional so assume they must be LoGiCaL and anyone who tries to compel them to be empathetic is crazy.

[–]SewudFDS Disciple103 points104 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

They definitely catch the parents' attention more. When my parents took my brother's Ethernet cable he trashed the house and punched holes in walls. Same scenario repeated itself with my other brother. Also if my two brothers fought each other my parents would immediately intervene and take it seriously.

Me? I didn't have a computer because "girls don't like computers" and I got bullied by my two older brothers constantly and my parents never tried to intervene. Instead of responding by kicking down doors I'd just cry and that went fully unnoticed because I guess a girl crying is nothing special.

[–]thehappiestelephantFDS Newbie58 points59 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I guess a girl crying is nothing special.

And if you'd trashed and damaged the house, you would have been expected to take accountability for your actions. Which is why you didn't do that in the first place. Because you've grown up.

[–]huevos_and_whiskeyFDS Newbie38 points39 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If a girl trashed and damaged the house, she’d probably end up institutionalized. She’d have some serious diagnosis on her record and her life would never recover. If a boy does it, it’s just boys being boys.

[–]pizza5001FDS Newbie22 points23 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I’m sorry to hear that. You don’t deserve that.

[–]Waste-WinFDS Newbie30 points31 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is what I've been saying all the f time! Man are just as emotional but they don't even learn how to identify their emotions

[–]Phoenix__Rising2018Ruthless Strategist30 points31 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I would make that little boy clean the whole kitchen for that. Imagine how she's spoiling her children that her 14-year-old is throwing a fit he has to do something so simple?

[–]Meadow97FDS Newbie27 points28 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

One thing i have noticed is that men seem to think being emotional means to cry hence why they say men aren't emotional. Yet anger is an emotional response, so is annoyance, the silent treatment ect

[–]SayNadFDS Newbie18 points19 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

A lot of men pulls the silent treatment/sulking a LOT. Especially older men. That's... that's literally how a child would act when their emotions are disturbed.

[–]sexxxybaePickmeisha™️17 points18 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

40 and over men have them too. I was so used to my ex and his "tantrums" that when i would talk to other guys and they said they had a bad day at work, I was surprised they weren't pissed. Not all guys are like this but some definitely are...

[–]SayNadFDS Newbie20 points21 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

I work a cashier job now and sis, even men in 50s, 60s, 70s, 90s allll have tantrums. For something they did and of course, blaming it on the cashier. Fucking bullshit.

The older they are, the more egoistical they become and hence, the fucking shitshow they throw on minimum wage workers.

[–]HaveNoIdeaWhatToPickFDS Newbie13 points14 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

The older they are, the more egoistical they become

Truee! And they become very talkative too, sharing with you their bullshit stories about what they like to eat etc. as If we had nothing better to do than listen to them lol I remember this one older dude that talked so long about his opinions on modern youth to the cashier that people in line started to give him murderous looks haha

[–]SayNadFDS Newbie13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Truee! And they become very talkative too, sharing with you their bullshit stories about what they like to eat etc. as If we had nothing better to do than listen to them lol

Sisss you just give me flashbacks to older men start talking about bullshit umprompted and I have to stand there all smiling pretending to be interested. Fucking scrotes, ughhh.

And of course making all the other customers wait because their stories is so fucking important, we have to listem to them finish it. Otherwise they will rage and want to report us for "bad behavior and being rude to customers".

Fuck that bullshit.

[–]sexxxybaePickmeisha™️0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

Crazy... so it's just an individual thing then, not even an age thing.

[–]SayNadFDS Newbie10 points11 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Frankly I loathe serving male customers more then female customers because there's a high probability they'll start some sort of drama. Or demand us to get them all the things (that they can perfectly take themselves!) even though we are clearly busy at the cash register. And oh, hate wearing mask despite the threat of COVID literally in our area (there's already a quarantined apartment nearby) and "I left them in the car" - fuck you scrote. Just fuck you.

Female customers, in comparison just shop by themselves and are quick in paying. Some do act difficult, but it is very rare. I love serving young adult women the most, they are the most respectful bunch!

[–]CassieGreen85FDS Disciple6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I've had my fair share of shitty customers of all genders, and I still gotta agree with you on being more annoyed by male customers, a bit more if they're white ones. (although it really applies to all shitty male customers, white and Indian ones are the ones who I've encountered the most so far, due to my living location)

Like it or not, white AND male privilege are a thing. It really gets me to see a grown ass man, who basically was born with society and basically the world catered to him, throw a tantrum at a minimum wage worker.

Holy shit, I've had a male customer demand I follow him around (like a servant), and to come up with the art project for his son, I still remember the specifications: unique, creative, amazing, but still easy, fast (and lazy) to do, green, blue and yellow are his (son's) favorite colors, but no "gross girly" colors like pink, red and orange. No flowers, no butterflies, no stars, nothing girly, oh he's not into robots or planes. Do you have any other pre-cut foam things besides the shapes or colors I mentioend so far? Why can't you think or have these things, you're (as in, me) supposed to be artsy and creative (while pointing at our store sign)!

Basically scrote wanted his son to be top of the class but put zero effort into it.

[–]SayNadFDS Newbie1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Holy shit, I've had a male customer demand I follow him around (like a servant), and to come up with the art project for his son, I still remember the specifications: unique, creative, amazing, but still easy, fast (and lazy) to do, green, blue and yellow are his (son's) favorite colors, but no "gross girly" colors like pink, red and orange. No flowers, no butterflies, no stars, nothing girly, oh he's not into robots or planes. Do you have any other pre-cut foam things besides the shapes or colors I mentioend so far? Why can't you think or have these things, you're (as in, me) supposed to be artsy and creative (while pointing at our store sign)!

Basically scrote wanted his son to be top of the class but put zero effort into it.

He doesn't need help, he needs a good slap with a slipper.

[–]HaveNoIdeaWhatToPickFDS Newbie17 points18 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

People really need to understand that not showing emotions does not equal not having them. Secondly, just because someone has emotions that does not mean this person is incapable of logical thinking and automatically gets controlled by their emotions. Last, but not least emotional side of the brain is extremely undervalued considering that having it is necessary for healthy human connections and cooperation.

[–]MemberBenefitsFDS Newbie16 points17 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yep I always thought I’d have boys because It’ll be easygoing but lucky i had girls.

[–]Solaresa14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Oh my god, I get so so mad about people's weird opinions on children and gender.

My sister has two boys, and when she found out she was having her second, she was thrilled. Talking all about how much easier boy toddlers are than girls, how much easier puberty will be, etc...

The only reason anyone thinks it's so much better to have boys is because we have been socialised to accept men/boys' temper tantrums and emotions at any age, but women/girls are expected to behave like civilised adults and caretakers from birth.

Let children be children, understand that puberty hits everyone like a ton of bricks, and stop forcing your weird sexism onto your kids.

[–]m00nsh1n15 points16 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Only girl in a family full of boys here.

This is such BS! I won't say I'm an angel, but I can safely say that I haven't smashed up an entire room or choke my younger sister out of anger.

Men are the most irrational sex, but gaslight you into thinking it's your fault.

[–]chateauduchatFDS Newbie15 points16 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

My narc ex demon: "You're so emotional and immature, is it that time of the month? Are you on the rag?" (me, crying because I told him I'm hurt from all the yelling he does at me and I repeatedly told him I can't talk to him when he's yelling at me because it's disrespectful)

Also my narc ex demon: \constantly verbally and mentally abusing me, punches my tv, throws a brick through my window door, shattering all the pieces, threatens to throw away my deceased cat, threatens to tie up my pet snake to a tree**

MEN ARE SHIT AT EMOTIONALLY CONTROLLING THEMSELVES.

[–]verusckaFDS Disciple14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Ah, memories of my brother smashing our Nintendo/Super Nintendo/Sega Genesis because he lost a game...

People who expect boys to be less emotional are actively contribute to the social conditioning of boys/men to suppress negative emotions.

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

My brother would scare me when he’d throw his tantrums in his teenage years. I was so quiet and shy and too scared to even interrupt people. I love all my brothers, but they are the reasons why I don’t want sons if I’m ever unfortunate enough to have children.

[–]4E4MEFDS Apprentice12 points13 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Look, I don't disagree with this woman, or with the other commenters here that their family members have acted ridiculously, but there is some responsibility on the part of the parents if children are acting out this way.

I'll give you an example; I was having a conversation with my kid the other day about how we handle disappointments in our house, vs how the family of a friend of his handles things.

My kid told me that he was playing a video game with his friend, and he didn't get the avatar that he wanted (the game selects the avatar). So he was like "oh that sucks" and moved on. His friend also didn't get the avatar that she wanted and she had a full-on meltdown, such that the mom came into the room, figured out between sobs what was going on, consoled the kid about how awful it was that she didn't get what she wanted, and went back and reset the game. These are 10 year olds. A full-on sobbing meltdown? What?

How does a 10yo get to that point? Because their parents have not taught them how to deal with disappointment. Because they have always rushed in and fixed these little things. Because they always give in when the child whines that they don't want to do the dishes. Maybe they don't make the kid do the dishes, or other chores, at all.

This particular parent has admitted to me that she doesn't want her child to cry, ever. I've been witness to this kid starting other fights with kids and the mom always rushes in and defends her daughter, regardless of what actually happened or who actually started the ruckus. The mom never makes her kid admit her responsibility for the fight nor apologize for her part in it.

You want to know how our boys are becoming entitled? Because we as parents are enabling that kind of behavior. I mean in my example of a kid I actually know it's a girl, but these are the parenting attitudes that affect all kids.

My kid doesn't like to load the dishwasher either. Do I care? No, because we have obligations to one another as a family, which translates to responsibilities to our community, which includes respecting and adhering to the boundaries of others. I don't let my kids get away with disrespecting me in my own home because while they are little home is their whole world and they need to learn about boundaries from the very start.

I really hope that I am completely off base about this particular woman and that she is a HVW trying to raise HV men. I know I keep harping on parenting issues in this sub but I think there are a lot of young women here who have yet to become parents and I like to speak out to parents and parents-to-be to raise their conciousness, and not to do things the way many of us were raised. I can't change the adult men in my life, but I will be god damned if I end up raising rapists. It all starts with teaching kids boundaries from the very beginning.

[–]warinmymind94FDS Apprentice8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Exactly but be careful. My ex would internalize everything rather than talking about it, venting, or managing stress in a healthy way (like exercising, doing a hobby, etc) and also refused to go to therapy. He ended up punching a hole in the wall, driving very very recklessly, and he threw something at me. I ran out and was able to get picked up. I called him later and made arrangements to get my stuff from his place when he wasn't home. He tried getting me back and tried saying he was having a "panic attack" and it was his "anxiety". I told him no it was a tantrum and he was acting like a toddler plus the fact he actually got dangerous and put me in serious danger. Advised him to seek professional help but I don't think he ever got it.

Beware ladies. Man child tantrums are not "panic attacks / anxiety attacks". Do not let men con or gaslight by them using mental health as an excuse. It is not your job to be a therapist and you should not be putting yourself in harms way because he acts out like a toddler.

Leave at the first sign of a red flag and if a man ever gets violent throwing things, punching holes, going to hit you or making threats to harm you RUN FAST. if you're alone with him get outside. Call an uber or friend. Or get to your car and go! Don't worry about stuff you left behind or whatever. Just go.

[–]feast_or_famine1FDS Newbie17 points18 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You know when women have a bunch of emotions and mood swings during their period? Want to know the hormone influencing those behaviors? Testosterone. Yeah...

[–]eagleverestFDS Newbie7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

God, I love this tweet.

Men are not taught to handle their emotions. Girls, on the other hand, are required to have emotional restraint from a young age. But sure, “boys don’t throw tantrums” lol

[–]Pudding5050Pickmeisha™️8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Teenage boys are walking sacks of hormones, they're so emotional it's ridiculous.

[–]agdrag1238 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I hate it when people say that. Not true! Parents then feel they can give less attention to the boys and then we see serious issues later on.

[–]werker115FDS Newbie21 points22 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Lol what? As someone who has a brother..this is bullshit. My mom always talks about me having future daughters lol, because she loves me.

[–]UsagiHe-n7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Teenage boys are crazy wtf they on about

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I’m glad she put him on blast.

Women with sons seem to be too forgiving and baby his emotions.

Apparently, when women have sons, their brain re-wires itself (or something like that). It seems she’s the exception.

[–]ParfaitOwn2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Dishwashers broke. Time for that boy to get his fingers pruned up a bit.

[–]SutoOuta3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

No Kids Gang (ever) rise up

[–]nostradamusapologistFDS Newbie2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It drives me crazy when people (not the person in the tweet just in general) set up emotion and logic like they are natural opposites or that being logical is a moral quality. Logic is literally just a system if "if x, therefore y." A man acting like a lunatic bc he's being asked to clean is acting according to his internal system of logic. You can come to shitty conclusions with logic! It's in no way infalliable

[–]gcthrowaway2019FDS Apprentice5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

That's prime school shooter age

[–]virgonights2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

My parents had their work cut out for them when it came to my brother. I was so passive and independent even for the younger kid. When my brother moved out I had to tell my parents to back off that I wasn’t used to having my every move watched. From spending too much in my room to taking to much paracetamol in a week. I was on my period!!! And my habits for staying my room didn’t changed after my brother moved out. After two weeks I called them out on it and we laugh it about it now but it was insane

[–]tamalemami1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The stereotype that women are more emotional has always infuriated me. Women only cry more easily, but men are without a doubt incredibly emotional and they tend to express it in the most negative, harmful way

[–]SapphonieFDS Apprentice1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Love to see a boy-mom who can still tell it like it is. I feel like I just saw a unicorn.

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