I just wanted to say thanks for helping me pull my head out of my ass in 2020. My marriage is great because I have been taught to value myself in a *romantic* relationship and take no shit. Do you know where I falter again and again? Friendships. I'm always the one making plans, checking up on people, and giving pep talks. I have a laundry list of "guy friends" from my past who I do like spending time with and seeing over the holidays, however, I have been the one to initiate plans every. single. time. Why am I doing this?? If they liked spending time with me *they* would reach out. This year I'm moving closer to home after being away for college/career stuff for six years, past me would have been very tempted to reach out and reconnect. Do you know how many old guy friends I'm going to reach out to? Zero. They can put the effort in for a change.