~ archived since 2018 ~

It should be that simple. I’ve had a guy literally do all of these things, then proceed to say he doesn’t want us to be “official”.

December 1, 2020

TheRedArchive is an archive of Red Pill content, including various subreddits and blogs. This post has been archived from the subreddit /r/FemaleDatingStrategy.

/r/FemaleDatingStrategy archive

Download the post

Want to save the post for offline use on your device? Choose one of the download options below:

Post Information
Title It should be that simple. I’ve had a guy literally do all of these things, then proceed to say he doesn’t want us to be “official”.
Author kittycakes22
Upvotes 729
Comments 34
Date December 1, 2020 10:09 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/it-should-be-that-simple-ive-had-a-guy-literally.329076
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/k4veb0/it_should_be_that_simple_ive_had_a_guy_literally/

[–][deleted] 229 points230 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I’d be her girlfriend in a hurry.

[–]AmazonArtemisFDS Newbie207 points208 points  (12 children) | Copy Link

Anyone with an ounce of emotional intelligence knows she’s speaking straight facts. I’ll never understand how adult men justify doing all of that (the “I see you all the time, tell you my deepest secrets” bit), while expecting wife shit... basically be in a relationship without a title... and still won’t put a label on it.

Also she is gorgeous, completely correct and hilarious with impeccable comedic timing.

[–]kittycakes22FDS Newbie[S] 123 points124 points  (11 children) | Copy Link

Why is that? I don’t understand. “I want you to act like my girlfriend, but you’re not my girlfriend.” Is it because they’re waiting for the next best thing to come along? I can’t stand men.

[–]SaitschikFDS Disciple114 points115 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's strokes their fragile egos to be the " gatekeepers of relationships" as they like to call it.

They hate that they are so depended on women and sex, that's what they see as their revenge

[–]Karthasis11FDS Newbie93 points94 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Because men have problems with their egos. I think a lot of guys have father issues and crave validation from other men. They don't value this from women, bc they got it from their mothers so easily.

[–]Twolipz_78FDS Newbie32 points33 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

My ex supposedly didn’t get it from either of them and the way he describes his childhood sounded like a total shitshow! He once was on the phone with his Brother and said “your Mother” this and “your Mother” that. He has no relationship at all with either of them or so I was told.

[–]43rdaccountFDS Newbie14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

:-( sounds about right. the disrespect mothers get is so normalized

[–]goldiebabyFDS Newbie15 points16 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

My opinion? They don't think you are good enough for commitment, I am sorry for sounding harsh. They want you for companionship, sex, chores and therapy, that's it. Just watch when they do end up meeting a "worthy" woman. They lock it down so fast it'll make your head spin.

I personally feel that that psycho-analyzing other issues like mommy issues, daddy issues, ego, male fragility, attachment issues etc are simply BS. If he wanted to make you his gf/wife, he would do it in a heartbeat. I have NEVER seen this reasoning fail.

[–]kittycakes22FDS Newbie[S] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

What’s “good enough” to them? I’ve been wracking my brain thinking that out of all of these men I’ve dated, none of them seem to deem me worthy enough for a long-term commitment. I think it had to do with my being mixed race and dating white men, so I’m put in a box of “she’s not relationship material”. Just my theory anyway. It’s hard not to get down about myself, men are impossible these days.

[–]goldiebabyFDS Newbie2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It may be your race or it may be the guys you are picking. I recommend therapy to figure out if you have any weird patterns when you pick men. Do you date online? Do you meet guys in person (pre-covid obv)? Do you ask them out? Do you ask for exclusivity or labels? Do you ask for relationship progression (moving in, engagement, marriage etc)? Do you ask to meet his friends or family? If yes to any, STOP. But yes to therapy. Even a few sessions can help you figure out where you are going wrong. If it makes you feel any better, my white girlfriends are dealing with the same issue too.

[–]greatmanatee2Pickmeisha™️2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

simply put: women are letting them get away with it. Otherwise this wouldn't have happened

[–]whokilledhydraFDS Apprentice100 points101 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I had a LVM "best friend" orbiter who did all of this, short of sex. I initiated a conversation about dating several times. But he only viewed me as a friend, though he thought I was hot. Sorry, girl. We carried on as friends for a year or so. After he tried to have sex with me, I demanded either we date, or he leave me alone. He did not want to date. I blocked his phone. Three months later, I got an email that he was in love with me and was sorry he did not know it earlier. In that email, he declared valiantly he was not writing out of loneliness, it was true love. By then, I had a clear head. Looking back, I am shocked how I let that man access me for so long.


[–]ASeaOfQuotesFDS Apprentice78 points79 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

The alarm got me. In our dreams I guess. 😪

[–]windowseat4lifeFDS Newbie7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Same! I was happy for her.... then the alarm brought us back to the real world lol.

[–]if11bravehawkFDS Newbie51 points52 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

For a second, she made me believe there might still be some hope for men! xD

Guess not

[–]randomgirlimokFDS Apprentice57 points58 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

He wants HER to be in a relationship with just him, but HE can date other people.

[–]NotSoBunnyFDS Newbie9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I have straight up had a dude say exactly this to me.

[–]girludontbringhomeFDS Newbie30 points31 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Even the girlfriend title does not mean much, they will still use you...

[–]TropicalPrairieFDS Newbie27 points28 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Dogs > Men.

[–]FirePreferredFDS Apprentice24 points25 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Cats=dogs but both > men

[–]yggiwtmiihFDS Newbie7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

FDS math 💅

[–]yolosunshineFDS Newbie32 points33 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It’s a dominance thing.

If y’all in a relationship that means he has an obligation to reciprocate in kind and at that level if he expects wifey shit from you.

Otherwise in his (NVM) mind he’s free to receive anything and everything from you with zero reciprocal energy.

No title, no gf shit. No ring, no fiancé shit. No husband, no wifey shit.

Simple math.

[–]SaitschikFDS Disciple61 points62 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

The fuss some of those dummies make about calling a relationship what it is, is one of the most off-putting things about men nowadays.

Who should take such a man serious, honestly.

It's all a power and dominance play at the end of the day by the biggest losers

[–]Twolipz_78FDS Newbie18 points19 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Especially when their in their fifties and not to mention having criminal investigations done on them! Like, grow up!

[–]43rdaccountFDS Newbie9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

why is everything about power dynamics :-( cant they keep things simple. i guess foucault was right lol

[–]Elisa_LaViudaNegraFDS Newbie17 points18 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I communicated a standard to a guy I was talking to. Said I don’t do xyz with dudes that aren’t my monogamous boyfriend. He said “monogamy is great. I just think titles and marriage are arbitrary bullshit.” I know this man in his 30s did not hit me with the same TIRED dusty line that teenage boys use to try and manipulate young girls. I should have stopped talking to him then. He then went on to say that “most girls have a hard time keeping up with him mentally” and he “needs some serious wit.” Sir, first of all, I’m a grown woman. There are no “girls” present. Second of all, I literally did not ask. It seems like he wants me to be the one tap dancing to chase and impress him and it ain’t gonna happen. That was our last conversation and I’ve moved on.

[–]wrice05FDS Apprentice5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Oh FFS. What a tool.

[–]Elisa_LaViudaNegraFDS Newbie1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Right? Like, bro. You look like a leprechaun, you joked about me giving you a blowjob when you barely knew me, and are clearly expecting me to say how high when you say jump. That’s not how things work in my world. If I hear from him again, which I probably will not, I’m just going to block him. Fuck outta here with this foolishness.

[–]randomgirl34861FDS Newbie11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It will be a cold day in Hell the day I sleep with a man who hasn’t put a label on the relationship. Never have, never will. They don’t deserve it, and I truly believe the world will be a better place when we do

[–]pikkpieFDS Newbie8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's because he wants to keep his options "open" 🙄

[–]Squidwrd_TortelliniFDS Newbie11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

hahaha I busted out laughing. this is hilarious

[–]WinterMidst0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

YES. This happens. I didn’t realise it happened so often that so many people can relate.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2023. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter