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Approaching in slavic based language countries

January 9, 2015
4 upvotes

Do you use singular or plural when approaching unknown woman in slavic-based language european countries?

The social norm dictates to use plural, however singular appear much more intimate and dominant...

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Post Information
Title Approaching in slavic based language countries
Author SeekingTheWay
Upvotes 4
Comments 14
Date January 9, 2015 3:07 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit /r/GEOTRP
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/GEOTRP/approaching-in-slavic-based-language-countries.163617
https://theredarchive.com/post/163617
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/GEOTRP/comments/2rv14o/approaching_in_slavic_based_language_countries/
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Comments

[–]cnvb 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

I don't understand your question.

[–]SeekingTheWay[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

When you talk to unknown person before mutual introduction, social norm dictates that you use plural when addressing that person. However, I find it too detached and am generally having better results using singular as if I already know that person.

Maybe this isn't a concept in your language, what language do you speak?

[–]that_czech_dude0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

If she's older, the plural is safe choice, in czech. If she's younger, definitely using singular tho. Using plural on <30 reeks of formalism, pedestaling and distance. I can't see any way closing with that attitude.

[–]SeekingTheWay[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Yeah, if she looks about the same age I use singular (no way of finding out precisely). If she looks noticeably older, I would use plural, but that is not the kind of girls I go for (I am 25)

[–]jolly--roger0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

that approach can do nothing wrong.

[–]mojo_juju0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

(just stumbled across this sub and this thread)

I don't speak Czech or slavic languages at all, but damn... linguistics are interesting as fuck.

It is interesting to see how the slavic language group works, vs the romance language group... or Turkish.. vs Japanese... the formality of things.. super interesting.

@OP: what slavic language are you talking about, if you dont mind me asking?

[–]galluscio650 points1 point  (7 children) | Copy Link

Your overall strategy is good. What I've found effective is escalation, for lack of a better term, to generate familiarity. Start with the more formal (plural) "You", and as soon as you can, ask if it's okay to use the more familiar "You" (singular). You can say you struggle with the tenses and forms, and it would be a little easier to use the more familiar terms. They eat it up.

[–]SeekingTheWay[S] 0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy Link

oh but i am native...

[–]galluscio650 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy Link

Then make up some bullshit. For example, let's say I'm in Serbia, I might say something like, "I've noticed when I travel in Croatia and Macedonia - people there are a little friendlier, and often suggest moving from formal to familiar - much more so than here. What do you think?" etc. If she's digging you at all, she will likely suggest moving to familiar, as she won't want to be seen as unfriendly relative to the other countries you mention, etc.

[–]SeekingTheWay[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

wow, faking that i am a foreigner in my own country... honestly, that feels like too much effort for a simple lay :)

[–]galluscio650 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Perhaps I was not clear. I am not suggesting faking in your own country. I was suggesting you throw out an observation about ANOTHER country.

[–]mojo_juju0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

how freaking weird... to discuss how to approach people.

Dont even suggest you have an inkling of asking for permission to speak to her in a certain tone... wtf dude. that's not alpha. alpha is not asking the misses for permission...

alpha is being familiar with her but with a certain "twist", attitude, or intonation that suggest that you're being playful or flirtatious.

She knows why you're talking to her... its bc you want to fuck her. Let that mutual understanding be mutual and unspoken.

That's my perspective at least. What do you think?

[–]galluscio650 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

I am curious to know if you have spent any time in eastern Europe. In countries that utilize formal and familiar forms of address, as these do, one does NOT initiate conversation using the familiar form.

It is quite common for a person to ask if it's okay to move from formal to informal at some point. It's just culturally the norm. Like in western countries, when we say to a new acquaintance, "May I call you John".

If you were to address a stranger in the familiar form, you would be looked at funny, and the conversation would be brought to a close quite rapidly.

[–]mojo_juju0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I haven't... just Latin America really... so I definitely can't say that I know what I'm talking about when it comes to Eastern Europe. But that was my interpretation.. coming from a place of ignorance though...

Thx for clarifying for me. I had no idea about any of that.

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