This isn’t a super insightful thing, I’m just going insane on these Reddit posts in all the relationship subs.

Dude becomes insecure about his abilities after finding out his gf has repeatedly lied about orgasming: “dude get over it, you don’t understand. You’re pressuring her to orgasm, why are you making this about orgasming/yourself? Really you should be thankful she told you at all”

Man is told by his wife of a decade that she never found him attractive: “dude it’s not a big deal, women don’t really care about lucks, you should be happy that she’s attracted to the other parts of you, you just don’t understand”

Swear to god a man could be told he looks a half decayed wart hog and everyone would be like “don’t take it personally, it’s insecurity if you let this effect you. Really it’s a good thing she told you because now you can work on how to be a good partner and get her off. You need to be confident in yourself”

We hear platitudes about how men should be able to cry all the time but when men aren’t allowed to feel insecurity how much can people really claim to care about men’s emotions. When having insecurity in and of itself is a go to insult for men, how can we expect men to actually have healthy emotions or feelings of themselves.

Telling men to get over insecurity isn’t empathy or care, and telling men to just be confident isn’t real help.