There's a lot of rumors around the tv show The Voice that's about discovering young talent. Some men with high positions in the program are supposed to have made 'inappropriate remarks' (years ago sometimes), done 'inappropriate touching' (idem) and even committed sexual violence. No doubt some bad things have been going on, but social media, especially Facebook, have already spoken 100 verdicts before any court has spoken 1. Liberal and neutral news sites online together post something about this, however trivial, every hour.

And it doesn't stop there. Of course more and more articles and columns appear about 'teaching all boys and men respect' and 'not sexualising women'. While it's highly probable that for every boy not respecting boundaries, there are about 5 so shy and 'respectful' they feel paralysed towards girls as it is, and ashamed about sexual feelings towards them. Worse: if you don't teach them there are positive ways to approach girls, they may in the long run get frustrated and do stupid things, when drunk f ex. One women's site made a list of 'creepy' things men can do, including offering women a lift, or proposing to accompany them walking home. Of course any spontaneous touch, however harmless, was included as absolutely disgusting.

The men's movement must be a lot more active and not just reactive when it comes to issues around approaching, dating, romantics, sexuality. Anti-male-sex waves like this happen every few years and get a bit worse every time. The result may be that in the long run even sex-positive men hardly dare defend anymore any behavior that was perfectly normal a few years ago, and that those norms unnoticeably shift towards the puritanical every day.