7 years wasted

Ogres_like_onions · 2017-05-28T18:22:22+00:00

[deleted]

2017-05-28T18:30:19+00:00

At 26 you still have time to build a great life. Start working now though. Get control over your mind, and start self-validating (get respect for yourself). Never get your validation from other people. Set goals, work to meet them, if you fail, that's fine, just try again.

TimeTravel101 · 2017-05-28T20:01:56+00:00

26?! You haven't started life yet.

bahdoinks · 2017-05-28T19:36:14+00:00

Dude, you're 26. You can easily set yourself up for financial independence by the time you hit 40. Or earlier. I was set at 26, great job, $850/month apt. Only a cunt derailed my path to independence by her inability to think or plan ahead and spending money on bullshit. Joke's on her as I kept the house we bought together. It was 45% underwater. I knew it would recover and now it's up 45% over the purchase price.

Whatever you do, have a plan, and don't let any woman derail it. If you get involved with a woman andshe tries to fuck with your plan, ask what her plan is. I guarantee it won't be better than your plan. I'm 44 and would love to start over at 26.

Ruby-xy · 2017-05-28T18:49:49+00:00

Take it as a lesson, you have to be able to live a happy life with or without a woman. You cant rely on women to be happy. "wanted some time to think" = "You're chances are as good as 0" Girls never have the guts to tell you the way it is, and they always want to have options open for them. So they want to make you believe that they might come back. But the only way for that to happen is to prove that you have a fulfilling life without them, but by then you have moved on and and don't want them back. This can be truly heartbreaking for young boys not educated about women.

toassie · 2017-05-28T21:31:11+00:00

what are you talking about bro damn. men become wanted at 30 and up! we never go out of fashion. women end theirs at 31. Get yourself together! you got 4 more years till your life begins 💪🏽👌🏼

2017-05-28T19:45:26+00:00

I hope I can salvage whatever strength I have and build a life for myself before it's too late

It's never too late, brotha. Keep your head up high. You walk among MGTOW, the giants of men. The world is yours for the taking.

mgtau · 2017-05-28T20:18:27+00:00

Better to figure it out at 26 instead of 36 or 46. You may have missed out on some years, but you've got plenty more ahead of you. It's never too late and you're still ahead of the power curve. Best of luck to you mate.

allowsnackbar · 2017-05-28T20:42:11+00:00

my first love left me for no reason

That's not true though. She had a reason - she found a person (or persons) who she considered better than you.

It is impossible to keep females happy. Ask Brad Pitt and the long list of wealthy, handsome celebrities who got taken to the cleaners in divorce and lost access to their kids. If Brad Pitt isn't good enough, everyone else is fucked.

2017-05-28T21:07:17+00:00

A little secret: you're a baby at 26. Don't look at the seven years as a waste, but a lesson of what not to do in the future. You know what you need to do now, so go do it.

Chin up bud :)

DeMeza · 2017-05-28T20:36:22+00:00

I don't know how much MGTOW stuff you already read and watched, but when you learn more about female nature, you'll really understand the major difference between how men love and how women love. Men love the woman for who she is. Women love the man for what he can do for her. It's the sad reality. But for me it has been a help not to think about the "loss" of an ex-girlfriend, but instead appreciate that I was able to love her. And quite frankly, you can love again, but the question is whether you want to. Is it worth it? Probably not. But I think it's helpful to understand that the love you felt (or perhaps still feel) comes from within you.

And it has already been said, you still have plenty of time to build something for yourself. You don't have "nothing" because you still have yourself - you're a man! Good luck!

2017-05-28T22:21:15+00:00

Bro you're 26 not 76, relax.

Lol.

2017-05-28T18:16:58+00:00

Amen brother. Best of wishes to you.

2017-05-28T20:25:32+00:00

What you feel I believe has to do with a biological imperative as well as a strong pair-bond being broken (We are still running on caveman software after all). It happened to me as well in High-school and I'll never be 100% over it psychologically even as I just hit my 30s. It's something I know will linger a little bit in the back of my mind until I'm in the grave.

I eventually did realize I wasn't the only one though, there's plenty of us. The fairy tale of 'one true love' is a myth. Nature would have us breeding by age 16 and then raising our children, but most women are on a time period now to not want kids until their mid to late 20s and it's 100% their right to do so. We can go deep into social theory about the pros and cons because of this for both men and women, however we can leave that to another time.

This chart below sums up my thoughts on the matter on why this happens and I believe it to be so. Now compare all the 19 year old princesses to their male peers on the chart. It was an uphill battle from the start. Relationships 1.0 is dead and gone for the families of the working class, the dating game is now built on the pillars of hypergamy- first socially (Alpha fucks), then financially (Beta Bucks).

https://rationalmale.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/smv_curve1.jpg

2017-05-28T22:16:41+00:00

How the hell do you spend 7 years depressed after a teenage relationship? Have you seen a doctor? This is not normal. I lost what I was sure is the woman of my life after a super intense 1,5 year relationship and the last months were pure hell, taking a huge toll on me. Took me no more than 3 months to get back on my feet after that. Come on, man.

Revorob · 2017-05-28T23:56:56+00:00

That's not seven years wasted; that's seven years learning an important lesson in life. If I had learned the same lesson in life by the time I was only 26, I would be miles ahead of where I am now.

FreeNClear32 · 2017-05-29T00:13:05+00:00

I hear you man.

I pined over a girl for about 9 years. Sad part was, we were nothing more than friends. I had built it all up in my head that i "loved" this girl, without ever being more than just friends with her.

Asbestasio · 2017-05-28T23:09:34+00:00

the best day to go MGTOW was 10 years ago. the next best day is today.

Jonlife · 2017-05-29T01:02:00+00:00

You've got you're whole life ahead of you. You said it yourself you let her get to you. The best revenge is success. I take it everyone around you couldn't get through to you. They may have all been Cucks themselves who made it look like the only way to live a good life was to be married and have kids.

That's actually the best way to an early grave full of depression and malnutrition.

I was right there with you when I was college only I didn't get kicked out, but I still felt empty because of that lie that had been implanted into my head about needing to have a good woman to really feel happiness. It's bullshit. A man doesn't only love once. He does what ever the fuck he wants. A woman will never love you so why is it that these white knight Cucks continue to feel the need to try and love them, when they're never going to get the same type of love in return?

Bro, they're all the same. You didn't nothing wrong 7 years ago and she's still left you. Start soaking in all this red pill information. You're about to hit red pill rage full speed ahead. But you're about to also realize that you had the power all this time. She had you brainwashed. Used and abused. Women can't survive without a victim. This is a new chance for you. Don't be a victim.

oldmanlogan76 · 2017-05-29T09:00:41+00:00

Age 26 is nothing. Plenty of time to rebuild and do whatever you want. My friend lost everything at 46. Business, house, all assets etc and still managed to rebuild.

Don't cry over lost time, it's futile. I'ts like crying over all the hours lost sleeping.

You have a blank canvas now and an opportunity to really figure out what it is you want from life.

up_syndrome · 2017-05-28T20:57:22+00:00

Did you seriously dwell on a woman for seven years? Jesus Christ, man.

SirWallaceII · 2017-05-29T00:58:27+00:00

brotha, u aint loose shit.

do u know how many guys would die to be in your place? They got divorce raped, cheated on, their kids taken away, their money taken, their lives ruined.

u will be ok. practice self actualization

mrscene1 · 2017-05-28T19:49:45+00:00

I started my first year of university at 24. Now I'm 33, an actuary, with a Merecedes. :) Start living!

2017-05-28T20:47:26+00:00

Its definitely hard. How long have you been with her before? If it is your first girlfriend it may take years to get over it.

But be thankful to her. Because all the pain you have been through now is saving you from a much worse situation many of your friends will go through irreversibly later in life. Being redpill this early is good. And sometimes you need more times and more experience to realize that AWALT. So go and experience more if you feel like it, just be aware of AWALT. Im 31 and I tell you I was looking for this all my life, girlfriend after girlfriend. Imagine... back in the days mgtow wasnt even all over the internet like today and with all the feminism and bullshit throwing sand in your eyes you were an easy prey.

I still think the worst times for men were from 90's to 2010. After that information got all over and now we have the tools to be free without women. Back in the days women had an immense power over men, men use to fight for women, men still do but people are more aware.

Love and pairbonding in men have a devastating effect in your brain (at least in most men). It acts like a drug, it fucks your testosterone and floods it with Oxytocin. Withdrawal from it will cause the same effects as drug withdrawal, so only time can fix you. A man can love many times I guarantee you. A man can even love many women at the same time we were built for that. But that love is our kryptonite. It will make us weak slowly, dependant, hedonistic... When you find yourself to comfortable and ditching your hobbies and brothers you are done...She got you...And she will only finish you when she turns you into a beta...There she leaves you... Women act exactly like a parasite. They are programmed to suck the life out of us, and when we are finally enslaved they dump us. When you say that faggot bullshit that she was your love blablabla that is called Oneitis and happens to man all the time. And it doesnt matter, it can happen to another future girlfriend you will have that is worse than this one. As for women they dont have Oneitis, they have tingles.

Beware that if she left you because she needed to think she probably cheated on you or was planning on doing so.

Women are risk averse contrary to men. Women will never risk leaving you out of the blue, they always leave you when they have something else already......No matter how much shit you do to them....

2017-05-28T22:08:47+00:00

I have a very similar story, but it was only about 4 years wasted... still, it stings. I'm 29 now, woke up around 24 and am finally getting to a solid position in life, good savings, good job, side business, makin friends, toys/hobbies. But, not to worry OP - you dodged a bullet, 26 is still very young, just bust your ass now for what you want and it'll happen. Plenty of people never wake up and they "waste" a lifetime really, and there's no recovering from it.

letsriseup · 2017-05-29T01:59:51+00:00

You're still 26. Time is still on your side.

Don't make the same mistake again and dedicate yourself to self-improvement. You will rock chit in your 30s. You'll be fine as long as you don't go down the simp road again.

account4189 · 2017-05-29T05:51:10+00:00

i'm going to add some counterweight to all the shame I see in this thread.

The same thing happened to me. I'm 40 years old. It was traumatizing enough to give me nightmares and negative affect for OVER 20 YEARS.

And no, therapy did not help. Nothing helped, and nothing does help. it's just something I carry with me. And for those men who are able to bounce back quickly - even other MGTOW - good for you. Not every man can do that.

OldRoad · 2017-05-29T05:52:55+00:00

26 is plenty early to get yourself organized. I think I have heard that there are plenty of people who even begin a second career around age 40.

Remember, so often, we always think that we are the only one in a situation. But I think you'll find, if you just ask around (on this group, for example), that there are tons of people who wish that they had done some things differently, and used past time differently.

I'll give you an example for myself. I spent around 15 years seriously trying to date, before I reached the conclusion that it was a waste of time for me. I had very little success, but I didn't know any better but to just keep trying. If I had to estimate how many hours I spent on dating-related stuff, my guess is thousands of hours. Could you imagine if I had spent that time taking college classes, or otherwise learning a skill, or anything else productive?!

As far as money spent on dating-related expenses, I estimate that as being around $25,000. Think about that. That's a year's income for some people. Of course, I spent that over roughly 15 years, so average is a bit over $1000 per year.

So, with all that time and money back, think what I could have done instead. But it's pointless to be unhappy about that, because I can't go back and re-do that part of my life. And you know what? I don't know that I would want to (okay, well maybe it would have been nice to quit dating much sooner than I did!). But I learned a lot. It all made me who I am today. It helped me to go MGTOW. And it was all life experiences, some of which are different from any other life experiences that I've had. Remember, a typical life is like a movie, ups and downs. I think that it's a rare person who only experiences good things.

Here's another example: Some folks don't take learning seriously until later on in life. Then they realize how far behind they are, compared to people who were constantly studying, for years and years.

But it really doesn't matter, because many people are in that boat. What matters isn't so much the past (that you can't change), but what you start doing for now, and for your future. Look at today as a new beginning for you, set some goals, get organized. Decide what kind of life that you want, that is realistic, find out how to get there, and then you can get to work on it. :-)

This doesn't mean that every day will always be excellent, or that you will always meet every goal exactly when you planned, but that's life. I overplan a lot, and sometimes run out of time and/or energy before I get everything done that I wanted to do, in a given day. I'm not always happy about it, but I just start the next day, and try to do my best all over again.

One more note: If you find yourself unable to get yourself going, and cheer up, and/or if you think that you might be depressed, or have some other problem, maybe you should see a doctor. Don't spend years unhappy if you can be helped.

I hope this helps you.

htyuyjhjhjh · 2017-05-28T19:07:42+00:00

"Time to think" means "I wanna go fuck many different guys at once while playing them all thinking im their little angel"

as a guy who lived with 4 females most of his life, trust me, women are NOT worth the hole they try and tame you with,

topshelg · 2017-05-28T20:08:20+00:00

Dude don't let some bitch take over your life like that. I feel for you though as it isn't easy but this place will hopefully snap you out of it.

Just don't even think about woman anymore, focus on yourself, create personal goals and achievement that YOU can feel proud of not because you want to impress some cum guzzler. Once you got your life together and have a stable job and a bright future ahead of you, you will see that the only thing really holding you back are woman.

ghost_Rogue · 2017-05-28T20:21:26+00:00

I'm still a bit younger than you and often struggling with life myself... all I can say is that though I regret all the time I have wasted being depressed, I realize now that I needed it to grow. I needed to deal with all of the BS that happened to me and I needed to deal with it alone. Why it happened to me? I have no clue. But this is what it is. And now we have to make the best out of it ourselves, but keep the lessons learned in mind. Let the depression have at least that value.

You could take it one day at a time but it would be wise to make a plan for the more long term. Realize most guys have their midlife crisis at 50. A lot of guys here have it in their 20s.

I wish you the best of luck.

kp76 · 2017-05-28T23:10:27+00:00

Dude you got off easy. Pick up the pieces and better yourslef now. You can do it.

MK_D · 2017-05-29T03:10:41+00:00

It's not the grades. You didn't have a passion for it. This i another chance to find what you are good at. College is for women! I'm 32 and have a similar story and trust me it was way worse. I feel like I'm just beginning to get it.

goadsaid · 2017-05-29T03:16:38+00:00

I completely agree that a man can only love once. Possibly not at all if he gets old enough. It was beat out of me and now 4 years later at 30, I have no emotional inclination whatsoever. I don't think I could "love" if I dedicated myself to it (fuck if I'm going to).

Part of me suspects that this is the reason young marriage was/is pushed by tradcons. I think there's probably wealth white guys in ivory towers going "Fuck. if they get to my age, they'll never sign up for this shit and then no more taxpayers. By 28 they are a lost cause."

The irony is that half the tradcons aren't even married or married late. Milo, Lauren Southern, Tomi Lauren, Stefan Molyneux (late 30s), Gavin Mccinnes (mid 30s).. Yet they go around championing marriage at 19.

Unicour1992 · 2017-05-29T03:22:45+00:00

Are you seriously blaming a teenager for screwing up your entire life?? At some point you gotta take responsibility for your own life dude, you could have seen a therapist in 7 years if it fucked you up that badly

demontits · 2017-05-29T06:05:05+00:00

A man can only love once.

Lol what is this shit? I didn't think it was possible to be such a pussy that you fuck yourself over so much over a high school girlfriend. Everybody breaks up before going to college.

She did you a favor.

2017-05-29T07:01:55+00:00

26? Life hasn't even begun. As weird as it sounds, you're very lucky this happened to you at 19 and not, say, 40.

IslandicFreedom · 2017-05-29T08:50:26+00:00

26 is fine. In my case I invested 10 years in a marriage. Around 3 years ago I had absolutely fuck all. I'm 40 now.

Let me repeat, She got the house, all the furniture, the car, and every other piece of tangible asset, even the liabilities.

In my mind I thought, well that's it. I'll never recover from this. I was convinced I had lived my life, and had my turn, and now there simply wasn't time to recover.

I started drinking heavily and wanted to kill myself. This only lost me even more time - roughly another year of bullshittery.

But then I pulled myself up by the jock straps and got to work formulating some real plans. Sure it wouldn't be instant and there would be some compromises but I stuck to the plans.

Now I own a small flat, nothing special but it's mine. I'm buying a new car, and my next plan is to use this flat as a deposit for a house. Pretty much back on track at that point.

cashmoney_x · 2017-05-29T13:59:52+00:00

She's a woman- 7 years to think is not enough. Give her a few more and she'll be back.

mofono · 2017-05-29T14:37:11+00:00

You have your freedom and 26 is still young.

Crisgocentipede · 2017-05-29T15:13:07+00:00

Can remember I was 26. Was not redpilled till I was in my thirties. You are lucky to be young and find this out. It took me years to figure this out. Some are not as lucky to find this out sooner.

MrKlowb · 2017-05-29T21:20:07+00:00

Self-pitying garbage, you're alone because of yourself, no one else. Another "poor-me" loser.

the_unseen_one · 2017-05-29T23:28:44+00:00

Sorry to hear that man, but better late than never. Learning about women's inability to love anyone other than their kids (and sometimes not even then) is a very painful lesson.

For me, what really helped was being brutally honest about my ex. Not only about how my ex treated me while we were together in comparison to how I should have been treated, but about them after we separated. Not only are they fucking and sucking every cock they can get their hands on, but they have never once regretted destroying you as a person for their selfish and impulsive desires. She never thought about you, they never really cared, and her lie about "time to think" was told to you because she was too much of a selfish coward to tell you why she was really ditching you. You are nothing to them, so why do you give so much of a shit about somebody who wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire? Accept that she is a horrid human who never cared, and use that to cauterize your feelings and regrets. What you thought you had never existed.

As a heads up, you're getting to the age that women start to hit the wall, so be wary of a "random" message from this bitch seeking to reopen ties to you. SHE DOES NOT CARE ABOUT YOU. This is simply a ploy for her to use someone she views as a disposable asset for money, security, and possible kids if she doesn't already have them. Do not fall for it, and if you have any of her old contact info, block all of them and delete them.

blackierobinsun3 · 2017-05-28T20:26:12+00:00

Nigga you 26. Sounding like a old man n shit, your 5 yr old self would slap you if he saw how you are today, Go to test teachers online, get some IT/finance/insurance certs and you can land a 50k job easy, safe up and take a trip to South America and find a wife

Title	7 years wasted
Author	deadlift21
Upvotes	128
Comments	72
Date	May 28, 2017 6:02 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW/comments/6dv6i5/7_years_wasted/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW/7-years-wasted.585232 https://theredarchive.com/post/585232