A Bedtime Infidelity Story (Second Hand)

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Throwaway account. This is a story of infidelity from years ago. Not my story. Just something I will share about my freshman roommate and friend to this day.

About my friend, Mike. We were assigned as roommates my freshman year. Genuinely good guy. For sure quirky, but good hearted, genuine type of guy. Reliable, courteous, quiet. SMART. Like I think almost genius. Type that keeps to himself, shy. Good looking, in my opinion. Very introverted.

I learned of this story a few years ago during a college reunion where a bunch of us and our wives got together for a football game. We were drinking and exchanging stories and Mike’s wife insisted we hear his infidelity story.

Turns out after college, Mike got himself in a pretty serious relationship with this woman he was friends with in college. I remembered her (Mandy) as a friend of his. Never knew they dated and got pretty serious. This was around 1994, so quite a while ago.

Anyway, on to the story. Mike and Mandy were dating a few years. He lived in the city and had a small loft apartment. She moved in with him. Money-wise, Mike was pursuing a successful career in finance and was doing well as expected. Mandy was less motivated. Worked, but wasn’t contributing a whole lot financially.

As you often hear, Mike was engrossed with his job. Worked long hours. They had there ups and downs but overall pretty solid- so he thought. He explained he felt she was the one, and was seriously contemplating proposing. They had discussed marriage several times. I could imagine how this was dragging. Mike does nothing on a whim. Hindsight, smart move.

At some point, Mike started getting bad vibes. Mandy was going out during the week, hanging out with people from work. People who, months earlier, she could not stand to be around. She actually considered quitting her job of them. Mike met these associates early on and liked them. Additionally, she wasn’t interested in doing much of anything with him when he had free time. Sex life took a dive. Remember, these were the days prior to cell phones, so nothing on that end to monitor.

One evening, Mandy claimed she was going out after work with these work friends. She always told him where she was going. Well, he decided leave work early and join them. A surprise. Upon arrival, friends where there, but no Mandy. Seems Mandy hasn’t been hanging out with them as much as she claimed. Mike went home and kept it to himself. Over time there were other incidents where she wasn’t where she said she’d been. Must have been killing him, but he’s not one to accuse without evidence.

His patience paid off. She wasn’t lying in that she did not have a good relationship with these co-workers. Mike received a call at work from one of Mandy’s associates and got the whole story. She’s been screwing around with a co-worker. Guy was married, had kids. Mike seemed more upset that it was with a guy with a family. Sad.

Mike became obsessed with somehow letting this guy’s wife know. He did not want to blow this up (with Mandy) and give AP the opportunity to “come clean” under the guise that “he (AP) could not live with the guilt”. He wanted AP caught.

Again, Mike being patient. He waited. Now understand, we are all listening to this, beside ourselves. Like who can freaking continue living with this! This had been going on for months! Mike basically said he was checked out at this point.

The opportunity finally came at Christmas. Mandy’s company had a Christmas Party. Mike insisted on going. Mandy did not want to go, which assured Mike that her AP would be there with his wife. Sure enough, he was spot on. They were there. Mandy and AP were being awkwardly distant from each other. So how can he confront AP’s wife? He wrote on a business card “I urgently need to speak with you in private, call me”. He waited for the opportunity and during a brief exchange he presented it to the APs wife.

Sure enough, AP’s wife called him at work on Monday. He explained everything. Turns out, this was not the first time. This poor woman was distraught. Mike is a kind guy, and said he spoke with her several times afterwards. Mike was adamant that he remain anonymous. He wanted to see if Mandy would ever confess. AP’s wife filed for divorce, was from a very wealthy family, and pretty sure she took him to the cleaners. Appears AP’s parents have been keeping them afloat due to AP’s inability to support his family. (Sounds like he should have spent more time on his career).

Back to Mike and Mandy. Within a week- “BOOM”. Mandy wasn’t going out anymore, was noticeably depressed and anxious. The affair appeared to be over. AP must have been trying to save what’s left of his butt. At this point, Mike’s thinking Mandy’s going to come clean. He was over her at this point, but did not want to deal with it. He also wanted some retribution. Just kicking her out was too soft of a landing.

After grieving the end of her affair, Mandy decides they need to start working on her and Mike. “Plan B”. She starts talking again about marriage and they need a grown up place and she needs a change etc. Then a light bulb went off in Mike’s head. The lease on the loft was up anyway. He had a plan.

He agrees with Mandy and they both start looking at homes and apartments in the suburbs. They found this beautiful condo north of the city. It was HUGE. As described, very upscale. Gated, high ceilings, crown molding, amenities galore. Mike was very calculated in steering this search towards rentals. As I said, not a stupid guy. He and Mandy talk and he tells her that he will pay the rent and utilities, but with student loans and his income, he’s not able to do much more. As long as they are patient with decorating and furnishing, he would be ok. She agrees.

They move in. As you might imagine, Mandy could not stand Mikes ugly, post college man furniture. She couldn’t take it for even a week. She became obsessed with decorating. Mike stood firm in that he is all tapped out. He reminds her that she’s not paying any rent, phone, utilities, cable. He also throws in that he was planning in saving for a ring. So Mandy takes it upon herself to refurnish the apartment. Leather couches, expensive furniture, new kitchenware, appliances. Eventually, all his furniture was in storage, waiting to be sold. Her mission was to showcase on Better Homes and Gardens. According to Mike it was unbelievable.

What wasn’t shared to this point in the story:

Mike had been discretely working with headhunters this whole time. He was patiently looking for a new opportunity and a fresh start. He started making a name for himself in his profession as sort of an “up and comer”. After a month of moving to he new apartment, he was offered his dream job, with a huge pay increase.

The AP’s wife kept her word and never divulged where she found out about the infidelity. Mandy never knew that Mike knew.

Mike had plenty of money saved. He made incentives and received bonuses. He paid off his loans and was saving considerably.

Mike’s was the only name on the lease. He also had a nice relocation package with his offer (included a lease buyout).

Mandy’s insistence upon furnishing the apartment right away, required her to max out her credit cards and borrow money from her parents.

What finally happened:

Once Mike accepted the offer, gave notice at work and to the landlord, he FINALLY confronted Mandy. She denied it, until Mike shared AP’s name, AP’s wife’s name, her co-workers info, all the times she wasn’t where she said she’d be. He also let her know that he kept in touch with AP’s wife and had more pertinent details after her ex husband came clean.

After she couldn’t deny it, she blamed him. Working late, emotional needs, whatever. That’s when he agreed that he was a terrible BF and that’s why he’s leaving and she will need to move out. He showed her the lease termination, his offer letter and acceptance.

He said she cried, begged and pleaded etc. Eventually she came to terms and had her family and a U-Haul there. He said that was the worst part. Having to watch them move out. Just pitiful. Uncomfortable, but after all it was HIS security deposit.

So that’s the story. Mike said he never looked back and has no idea where Mandy, her huge debts and expensive furniture ever went. That’s the last he’s seen or heard from her.

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