I'm sure you guys hear this shit slot. I'm in my late 20s. I haven't had sex in a. Year. And I can't find any girls to just casually hook up.
I don't want to beat the meat because I feel super sluggish and unmotivated after doing it for a day or two. I like the energy I get from abstaining. And I wake up earlier when I do. If I fantasize or entertain anything sexually. Then the fire gets going againn and then I feel uncomfortable again and frustrated. And eventually have to do some beating of the meat.
I see what I need to do. Self actualization. Really spend some time with my self. In deep work and focus on bettering my self and career.
But I can't fuckin shake this dumb blue pill feeling of wanting companionship. And a family. I genuinely want that shit. I hardly trust anyone to have it with. And I've spoken to so many girls. In the past year. None of them stood out to me as someone is want to spend even a week with.
I'm just unsure of how to get out of this stupid cycle of realizing what I need to do to get better. And then not fully following through. Does this shit go away into your thirties? And why do I feel like a loser when I don't get sex.
Even though in the back of my mind I have a lot of respect for those who are celibate and devote their sexual energy toward higher pursuits.
I think I may have a weak sense of self. Especially when I end up going to work and interacting with people. I'm so easily Influenced by others.
I appreciate any guidance I can get from fellow brothers.
And happy Father's Day to any fathers out there. I hope you're appreciated today.