Hey, all. I have a pretty non-traditional experience with women, I’m hoping not to get too much hate here but you all have helped me a lot, and I have some perspective that I think could be useful or thought provoking. I know the sidebar says no LGBT Proselytizing, so I hope this is not considered that. I am however, a transgender guy, and I’ve been on testosterone for five years. If you don’t like that, I guess don’t read it, but if there’s one thing I could say, I guess it’s that there are a lot of us out here that are not insane, freakish, SJW, #triggered, constantly offended babies. I’m as normal of a guy as I can be, if you saw me on the street you would have NO idea I was transgender, and I would do nothing to throw it in your face or make it obvious. I live as “stealth” as I possibly can. I always knew there was something “wrong” with me and transitioning was the best decision I ever made. I honestly just consider it kind of like a birth defect, and I don’t think about it very much.
That being said, in my “past life”, "as a woman", I was dating other gay women and it was all pretty great. Gay women have a much smaller dating pool, and frankly, they’re a lot like guys. They’re like the women you want to date because they are really forced to give a shit about one another, and try really hard in relationships to have loyalty and balance and love and their own fucking interests and lives, because they don’t get very many shots to attract, much less keep someone. I am still very good friends with a lot of these women I dated to this day. Yes, we were all pretty feminist-y and girl-power-y, but that’s because all of the women we knew and dated were like us, you know, and we would always laugh to one another about redpill and MGTOW stuff because it didn’t make any sense in our experiences with the women we were with. But that’s because we weren’t with straight women, and once I started dating straight women, it was this horrifying wake up call. Seriously, all of my worst nightmares from this sub came to life, and I hope you can appreciate my experiences with this, and what I learned.
I took the first years of my transition to better myself, and did not date. I wanted to focus on becoming the very best man I could be, and wanted to focus on my career and going back to school and learning how to navigate my “new” life. Once I started to get myself back into dating, I had this very rosy and idyllic view of how it was going to be in the “straight” promised land. I am, for the record, a pretty attractive, fit guy, if a bit short (5’7”). Either way, I was ready to get in with all of these girls in this huge dating pool in a major city that I was going to amaze because I “understood” them and “knew what they were going through” and stuff. What a joke. I wanted, I think, what everyone who is naive wants, to meet some awesome girl who loves playing video games and reading history books and get married and have a house and adopt some kids and dogs and ball out living this white picket fence life that I saw in the straight movies, or even just to go to some bars and pick up chicks and have the little black book or something. I knew the whole “dickless wonder” thing was going to be a hurdle, but since I had so much more confidence post-transition, I thought I could really hack it. Yes and no: the girls I dated had no problem with me having no dick, honestly…though I realized later that they would have, down the road when they got bored of me as a novelty.
So I guess, here’s what I have learned and witnessed, living on the other side.
The first thing I learned is that all women hate each other. The gay girls I dated didn’t have this problem, obviously, it just wasn’t a thing. They weren’t in competition because they all wanted to fuck each other. Now, everywhere that I have worked has been an ongoing power struggle with girls hating everyone they perceive as slightly hotter. Doesn’t matter if these women are younger than them, older than them, married, dating, GAY or anything, they just all hate all other women while talking about feminism and #metoo and all of this shit, then constantly shit talking and undercutting one another, trying to cast themselves in a better light and attract more attention. It’s beyond childish and it’s always ramped all the way up to 10. I watched girls get fired because of this shit.
The second thing that I learned is how ice fucking cold these girls are. They will ride your dick (okay, metaphorically) and actually, really pretend to like you, even “love you,” and then the second that you express more than casual interest in them, or do one thing “wrong”, they dump you like a rock and are riding another dick literally two days later. And they will tell you to your face that they just need to spend “some time not dating” or “time by myself” and surprise, they’re sucking some dude off 3 days later. One girl I was seeing, SERIOUSLY, I’m not shitting you, had “dated” 30 guys in TWO YEARS. That’s how fast she was blowing through them.
Third: They have a list of hard requirements. You are constantly being judged. Here you are, having this short list of what you need in a woman: nice, good personality, not deformed, wants to have sex, and you’re super flexible about height and weight and basically everything. Yes, you would prefer a skinny white suburban blonde girl with curly hair who likes cheeseburgers and poetry, but you’d also happily date a thick black bald girl with a good sense of humor who likes Chinese food and Adam Sandler movies. But your straight girl: she has a 50 page booklet of what she doesn’t like, feels neutral about, isn’t quite turned on by, likes, SUPER likes, likes on every third Friday, and would change about you (YES, I had a woman TELL ME TO MY FACE what she would change about me if she could [not dick related], and insist that I try to change so she “could be more attracted to me”). 30-guys-girl told me all of this weird shit that she “liked” about me (I rode my bike to work , I had “soft lips”, that I liked to cook) that I would never have cared about in a woman. You will never be enough for them because they can hop on Tinder and get another, better, taller version of you in 10 seconds. Meanwhile, on Tinder, you better be the first guy who messages her or have a damn good reddit tier pickup line for her to even bother swiping you.
Four: They expect your friendship after you date. This one killed me. I was told by a girl who had just dumped me that she really wanted to stay friends, and was weirdly devastated when I told her no. She “didn’t want to lose me” out of her life, and stood and “watched me walk away” and all of this weird-quasi-romantic stuff, even though SHE HAD JUST DUMPED ME. It’s 100% expected of you to stay in orbit and continue to giving validation, women cannot handle for one second the idea of losing a little friend zoned planetoid. This same girl told me that I was the “one person who always saw the best in her,” and she honestly could not handle that I wouldn’t be there to boost her self-esteem anymore. She will still text me every once in a while to just tell me about her life, how her crazy mom is doing, how work is, etc.
Five: No hobbies or interests. Straight women do not DO anything. They may have a tacit interest in some certain little stuff, but in general, their hobbies are 1. Netflix, 2. Social media/dog face Snapchats/Buzzfeed, 3. Shopping for things that they already have and racking up a shitload of debt, 4. Doing yoga and talking about meditation and self help books and smoothies and how healthy they are, 5. Whatever their boyfriends are/were into. When I asked a girl what her favorite book was, she told me the name of the book, and when I asked why, she told me “I don’t know, my ex just liked it a lot”. The fuck? SHE HAD NEVER EVEN READ THE BOOK. After dumping me, she proceeded to tell a mutual friend that HER FAVORITE BAND WAS MY FAVORITE BAND. ??? Go get Apple Music and put it on shuffle, Jesus. GET YOUR OWN INTERESTS. Or don't, some other guy is going to fuck you tomorrow anyway.
Six: Obsessed with constant validation. Unlike the others that gay women don’t do, yes, gay women do this too, but not to the same extreme degree. At our base, all humans are insecure, sure. But straight women? Constantly posting on instagram, just any old dumb thing they are doing. Flocks of followers liking and retweeting their shit. Like I said above, it’s like the world ends if they lose an orbiter, to the point where they will be having these creepy older dudes and married coworkers and randoms commenting them and sending them shit and propositioning them, but THEY CAN’T SAY NO to it. They make a big play about “shutting them down” and posting it to r/creepypms and all that, but they RESPONDED TO THE CREEPY MESSAGES IN THE FIRST PLACE, instead of just ignoring it like any sane person would do. It’s like they feed off of it and get their life energy from these “losers” messaging them and hitting them up, all while acting like they hate it.
Seven: Clueless as to why they have problems. Straight women, due to all of the above (and below), lead these really fucked up and unfulfilling lives. They’re not able to form true friendships with other straight women because they all hate each other; they’re not able to form loving relationships with men either, because they’re constantly using them and pitting them against one another for their affection; they will generally tend to be friends with gay guys, because only gay guys can match them in the amount of random sex they have (no offense to gay dudes, they just have a huge pool of people dtf). They get jobs that they are in no way qualified for because everyone wants to hire a hot chick and meet an HR quota, or they get promoted because upper management “feels bad for her”, so they’re always fucking up at work and feeling really “lost” and “stressed”. Women are constantly in some death spiral about wanting their life to have “purpose” and “meaning” and shit while doing absolutely nothing to achieve that goal. They don’t want to travel, they don’t want to have hobbies, they don’t want to actually do fulfilling things: the only reason they would want to is for the “Insta” pictures, so they can seem more sophisticated and alluring to their orbiters. They leverage their desire to have a “meaningful life” into having a child (which they fuck up and psychologically abuse), because that’s the only thing they can think to do. So they’re miserable, and they take out their misery on everyone around them by whining and complaining and reading more self help books and doing more yoga and posting more ‘nice girl’ memes on facebook. They can’t handle for one second the thought that they may be the source of their own misery. No, that would be ridiculous.
Eight: Filthy as fuck. Straight women, especially if they live together, just live in these filthy fucking shit palaces. All those pictures on instagram of girls posing all hot in their bedrooms while it looks like a bomb went off behind them? THAT’S EVERY GIRLS ROOM. I lived with a gay girl couple through all of this and we were all perfectly tidy because we respected each other, and all the straight girls I dated would be constantly “coming back to mine” because they didn’t want me to see what a messy, dirty life they lived. I was only allowed at one girls apartment twice, and then the third time I went over to pick her up, I saw inside her bedroom and…you could have hidden a dead body in there under all the shit and trash. Because she couldn't stop BUYING STUFF, and it just started overflowing. Holy fuck. Same girl was really surprised that I ALWAYS BRUSHED AND FLOSSED TWICE A DAY. “Really? I mean, sometimes I just skip it.”
Nine: At odds psychologically with themselves. Like above, I said that women are the source of their own problems, and the real problem is cognitive dissonance about what they want in a man. They want him to be an assertive, dominant douche bag for them to be attracted to, but then also want him to be thoughtful and sweet and great and loving so he’ll be “husband material”, after which they are promptly turned off by him and run off to find some another douche bag to fuck. Rinse, repeat. They're constantly telling you that "If it was right, it would be easy". The stories these girls told me about guys that treated them like absolute fucking garbage shocked the fuck out of me. As in, short of being chained up and putting the lotion on it’s skin, these girls would do anything for one second of attention. What they never understand, though, is that the men who treat them this way treat all women like that now, because they probably got their hearts broken by a shitty ass girl just like them. The dudes just wised up and figured out the game.
Ten: They have no loyalty, honor, or moral compass. The biggest change for me, transitioning, was this cult of manliness. The excitement of being involved in this big moral code of what men are supposed to be and act like was really thrilling for me. But surprise: if you act with honor and dignity while dating straight women, you’ll end up just like the Starks in Game of Thrones. Dead as fuck and cold as shit. You could walk over a bed of hot coals and used needles for some girl that you “love” and she wouldn’t spit on you if you were on fire, to put it out. As a guy, dating, you end up the same way, because they kind of force you into playing their game. It’s a race to the bottom.
Eleven: The hotter they are, the worse they are at sex. Self explanatory. If you're hot, why would you even try? My assumption was that the hotter girls fucked only lame, pathetic guys who didn't have the heart to tell them.
That’s all I guess, though I know I’ll be up late as hell thinking of more. The point is, I guess, that MGTOW isn’t a joke to me anymore, or some meme perpetuated by bitter, sad men. Yeah, I’m a little bitter and sad, sure. But with reason, as I know you all have as well. You put a lot of effort and energy and soul into dating a woman and treating her how you’d want to be treated, but it’s never enough. You always get burned in the back end. I have talked to other trans guys (and “real” guys) about their experiences and they’re basically the same. The more sane, normal and anti-SJW you are, the more likely you are to be ghosted or used for a few weeks as a novelty. Nowadays, I have a huge savings account, a nice STEM job, a house, a very fast car that I mod to my heart’s delight, no girlfriend, and no fucking problems.
If you have any questions, I’ll play AMA mode in the comments. I’m writing a book too, should be a doozy. Thanks for reading.
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