So I went to Starbucks, which I rarely do, and I doubt I will again, because I had a negative customer service experience.

I don't really go for Starbucks often. I prefer regular coffee which they do have, but at massively elevated prices. But I was slightly hungover and need a cuppajo.

So I get my drink and sit on one of the couches against the wall. Shit post on my phone, etc. Next thing I know Johnny Law pulls into the parking lot.

Not unusual, even the south's finest needs some caffeine. They go up to order or something, then come right up to me in a combative 2-officer formation. Primary oinker starts demanding identification, secondary back up has his hand on his gun. Nothing new there. I have had worse experiences with the boys in blue.

So I give them my license, primary goes out to run my info, while rookie stands there with his thumb up his ass I guess trying to execute authoritarian posturing.

So the main hog comes back, and everyone relaxes. Despite my lengthy history with the police, apparently I wasn't the right guy. Not sure what they were hoping to find, open warrants I guess, but that wasn't the deal.

This was the deal.

"Apparently" and I mean the sarcastic quotes, one of the employees there claims to have a stalker. The employee was not at Starbucks at the time. The manager decided I must be the stalker, and called the cops on me.

I'm a fairly distinctive looking individual, in both look, dress, and actions. People, where this Starbucks is located, do not look like me at all.

So because one of Starbucks attention seeking employees claimed to have a stalker, the manager decided I was said claimed stalker.

Now I am a piece of shit asshole, and do questionable things, but stalking baristas making use of their gender studies degrees career is not one of those things.

So everything is resolved. The cops apologized, and I'm happy to know I don't have any outstanding warrants, and the clam that as the manager came up and apologized and, get this, offered me some free coffee.

Not a year's worth, but one free coffee. For my inconvenience. You think they'd offer a little more than that, I mean calling the cops on a customer based on made up shit should be worth more than $0.05 of coffee. But maybe I'm just selfish and entitled.

So I left. No more Starbucks for me.

#MeToo

I've never been more proud.