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“Its your life, and its ending one minute at a time.”

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I want to take a moment here to talk about you, big guy. Not your sex life or your retarded relationship. You and your happiness, your state of mind. So step inside and close the door before you put your feet up on that brown leather recliner. Take a break from over-analysing the minutia in your battle of the sexes; and please, put down your quantum mechanics theory books. And yes, motherfucker, I have read all those books on the shelf over there by the window.

If you want the TL:DR now, my message is that either way you like it, what I know for sure, is that all of you here want to be happy - whatever your definition of that is. In the words of our own u/SorcererKing : ”The point of your life is to be happy, assholes”.

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Note: This is purposely theoretical and philosophical. If you think happiness is a crock of shit, you don’t understand it or you’re doing it wrong. Its not a goal, a mood or a feeling. It’s a state of mind. Describing ‘happiness’ is a bit like trying to describe ‘excellence’, both a somewhat abstract, intangible, relative descriptor. u/taipanshimshon is going to follow up with some practical application and examples.

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Thoughts on happiness from old people smarter than me

Lets quickly review some perspectives on happiness from people who know shit.

For Aristotle, the most notable of the metaphysical philosophers, happiness is the “highest desire and ambition of all human beings”. In his opinion, the way to reach it is through virtue. In other words, if one cultivates within oneself the highest virtues, he or she will reach happiness.

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Lesson #1: Happiness is not a goal it’s a way of life

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Epicurus proposed the principle that balance, and temperance were what created space for happiness. This idea is captured in one of his greatest maxims: “He who is not satisfied with a little, is satisfied with nothing.”. He also insisted in the idea that one should not work for money to be able to buy goods, but rather for the love of the work (a topic I will return to later). Epicurius states not that you must be a minimalist, instead:

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Lesson #2: Your ability for happiness with little will determine your happiness in any other state.

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According to Ortega y Gasset, all humans have the potential and desire to be happy. This means that each person defines their reality and what can make them happy. If a person is able to truly achieve and reach that reality, then they will be happy.

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Lesson #3: You can be happy if you want too. Perception is reality

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Slavoj Zizek proposed that being truly happy is a matter of opinion, and not of truth. He considered satisfaction and contentment a product of capitalist values which implicitly promise eternal satisfaction through consumption. However, dissatisfaction reigns within humans because in reality, they do not know what they want.

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Lesson #4: A solid mission is a prerequisite to be happy

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Nietzsche challenges the concept of happiness, describing it as an “ideal state of laziness “. In other words, to not have any worries or distresses. He felt, in contrast, that contentment could only be found in having vital strength and a fighting spirit against all of the obstacles that limit liberty and self-assertiveness.

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Lesson #5: Happiness can be perceived as overcoming adversity or "beating the odds"

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How you experience Happiness

Our philosopher friends have established that happiness is an abstract state of mind, which combines your emotions and your thoughts; all in context of your current situation and your past experiences. Modern research suggests about 40 percent of our happiness is under our control, and the other 60 percent is predetermined by biological set points and recent life events; but that is different for every person. That means that happiness is relative, and your baseline happiness (life satisfaction or long game) and daily fluctuations (day to day variations) are unique to you. So even the homeless hobo you kicked on the street today does have periods of happiness, but, it is fair to say that his baseline happiness is a lot lower overall. Maybe today he had a better day than you because he found a better place to sleep tonight. Yeah, he was happy about that. And yet there you are, all pissed off because the store ran out of peanut M&M’s.

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Lesson #6: - Happiness doesn’t come from getting something we don’t have, but rather from recognizing and appreciating what we do have.

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But short term happiness from regular life doesn’t last. The hobo has just realised the new digs are a longer walk from his favourite soup kitchen, and you managed to find the peanut M&M’s in amongst the regular ones the next day, so the balance of the Universe has been restored.

Hedonic adaptation is the observed tendency of humans to quickly return to a relatively stable level (baseline) of happiness despite positive or negative events or life changes. Life events like getting married, graduating from college, or being promoted affect our happiness levels, but their effects diminish over time. The process of hedonic adaptation is often conceptualized as a treadmill, since one must continually work to maintain a certain level of happiness. If they stop making those peanut M&M’s, you will get over it eventually. Naturally happy people need less effort to stay happy, hence the treadmill concept. In contrast, happiness from internal sources tends to last – Those achievements you made at work, that contentment you feel from a job well done, is internal happiness that boosts your long term baseline.

Happiness, possessions and money

You might already be able to see the connection here to money from the treadmill concept, and there is a big disclaimer here that this following advice doesn’t apply to you if you are living from paycheck to paycheck. You fucked something up, and you need to fix that. Pay attention in finance week. For the rest of you, remember money is literally given to us for our time. So beyond basic provisioning (seriously, sort that shit out), working harder and longer to have more money is a gamble on the value of your time now, versus the value of your future time; you are selling your time now to your company on the basis that those stacks of cash will make you happier in the future. If you knew you had one year of life left, you wouldn’t really try hard for that promotion would you.

So ease up on the consumerism, it doesn’t make you happier long term - You have a nice car, you don’t you really need a nicer one. One year after you buy that nice new car with the heated seats, they are going to release the same model with new LED headlights and a panoramic motherfucking moon roof. Do you really think excitement for the moon roof (excitement level 10!) is going to last? Of course not, you will forget it is there in 6 months, and you will be back where you are now. So, don’t underestimate the importance of how you ‘spend’ your time and money now versus later. Time is money, money is time.

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Lesson #7: - It is not the man who has too little, but the man who craves more, that is poor. –Seneca

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The impact of others on your happiness

One of the challenges we face is that our happiness is easily influenced by the outside world, specifically, other people. So many of us erode our own happiness by Giving Too Many Fucks, or maybe you’re looking to collect on all your covert contracts. In either case, you’re projecting what you think should happen onto others and setting yourself up for disappointment when they don’t do it. You’re butthurt disappointment reads as unattractiveness by the way, and its all making you unhappy. You can't control others, Period. Stop trying to.

DNGAF, OI and the stay plan / go plan mindset, are all designed to insulate you from your weak position of unattractiveness. But keep in mind, if you completely detach emotionally, you will limit your potential happiness by losing friends and or family. You will get a reputation, and that can be hard to shake. And don’t discount the value of increasing other people’s happiness; generosity and helping others is a well-documented source of happiness.

DNGAF is like lifting, more is better, but there is a point where if you overcook it, you are going to fuck it up completely. It is of course different for a very attractive man, girls will do what you want anyway, so you won’t need OI or DNGAF to insulate yourself from when they don’t do what you want them to do (cause that never happens). And as happiness is attractive, that makes a neat little feedback circle don’t you think?

So try to remember what it is you are trying to achieve through MRP; think a little harder about what it is you really want. You think you want your wife to give you a blowjob tonight? Sure, it feels good, but I guarantee what you really want from her is to show you how much she values you by performing a submissive act. Because the pleasure in knowing you are a man of value far outweighs the enjoyment of the act itself.

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Lesson #8: - Happiness is attractive

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The role of MRP and happiness

I’ll keep this short as u/taipanshimshon is going to go into more depth here.

The Red Pill is a praxeology, (the study of purposeful human actions – did you know that?), but what the typical RP subscriber (I avoided the term RP “swallowers”) experiences is a methodology or sexual strategy (i.e. the practical application). The basic assumption is that you’re here because you’re unhappy with your wife, and you came across MRP hoping to improve her “performance”. So, you LIFT, STFU and READ.

But even if you’re hardcore red, life is not all about sex, so stop fooling yourself that improving your wife’s “performance” is your end game. It’s a factor, sure, maybe 20% of what contributes to your happiness. Don't discount the other areas of your life - go and tell a joke to your son, pick up your daughter and swing her around. Go the fuck outside and do something that makes you feel alive. Come home and surprise your wife (no, not like that). Do it because you want to. Do it because it will make YOU happy. And that is attractive.

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‘Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking.’ ~Marcus Aurelius Antoninus

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