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60 DoD 2020: Week 3 Hygiene; or why it's about more than washing your ass.

April 15, 2020
74 upvotes

Introduction

I wasn’t looking forward to writing on hygiene. Luckily for me the Chinese Bat gods saw fit to give me a good pretence to talk hygiene. I’m going to assume everyone has already read the previous articles on hygiene on the sidebar. If not, please do so then come back. The guys did really good work and it’s hard to write something worthwhile when the reader doesn’t know how to wash his ass yet.

Why is hygiene a thing in a space with men and dead and dying relationships?

For starters, a lot of dead bedrooms are the guys own damned fault. If you’re not fuck able, no one will fuck you, regardless on whether you bring home the bacon or put a ring on it. I used to think most people had the basics down, but after a few years reading every sob story, every victim puke, every hat in hand request for guidance pretending to be a field report I realize that yes, we do have to ensure you wash your ass before going further. In addition, hygiene is about giving a fuck. You’d not believe how many guess dress like shit because they want the world to know they don’t worry about style like a fag. Message received asshole. Enjoy your complimentary Porn Hub subscription. Giving a shit about the little things means you give a shit about the big things. It’s counter intuitive until you actually do it, then it’s god damned instinct. Finally, and this is the part that I want the reader to take home from this, hygiene is leadership, for the above reasons and more. If you’ve not heard, we are in the middle of a definitely not overblown manufactured crisis. Since everyone is so afraid of liability that they will ensure they do every bit of security-theatre possible to show that

‘we are doing everything we can to keep you safe.’

You know who eats messages like that up? Women. Women love that people are ‘just doing something!’ regardless of whether it helps, hurts, or does nothing. Why? Because women process the world through their feelings, and feeling safe equates to being safe.

The Slippery Slope

I’ll bet if you look into all the chores around the house that you’re nagged into doing that a lot of them never made sense to you. A quick wipe with a clean cloth and some soap and water is sufficient, but Karen nags and nags for you to disinfect the counters with bleach, right? Never mind that sandwich you just made tastes like bleach and you’re probably killing everyone in the house, it just feels cleaner. I remember from my old blue pill days, my vegan girlfriend of the time was adamant that meat not share the same fridge space as anything else. That makes sense, except where she demanded that processed meat sit beside raw meat. Thats a cross contamination nightmare.

What does this have to do with hygiene? If you know how to be clean you know how to give a shit about a level of cleanliness you hold for yourself and whomever is in your house. Karen talks feelings and you know better. On my meat example I did the serving it right course, learned how to have proper food hygiene and when I got the demands, I ignored them. I know the place is hygienic, and all the whine mouth words in the world didn’t change that. I could safely ignore the nagging and maintain frame. My fridge is clean and I know it’s clean and thats the end of it. If you don’t care and she does, her feelings will eventually trump your knowledge. This is why nagging works, it taps into the ambivalence of men.

My girl fought it, for a while. Most kids do that when their usual tricks don’t work. They amplify them assuming they aren’t trying enough, then eventually give up if you’re consistent.

Hygiene

I’ve learned a lot from my military time. 12 years in the RCN. I’ve scrubbed more toilets than I can count. And we had a few simple rules for keeping a hygienic space. Since the ship was recycled air, everyone got sick if you didn’t, and your chain of command lines up taking turns tearing you a new asshole.

Bathroom

Two buckets, one with clean water and an empty one. One cloth and one brush with a little abrasion to it. A disinfectant (I like pine sol, but you can use bleach if you hate your clothes) some soap and something like VIM. Start at the top of the room and work your way down. Start with the cleanest items and work your way down to the dirtiest, everything gets a once over. Grab water from the clean bucket and wring out the dirty water in the other bucket. For the tub, sink and toilet it’s the same thing. Scrub them with the brush to get anything loose, then use the cloth to clean up the loose residue. Do the toilet last, I shouldn’t have to tell you this, and instead of sticking your hand in there just use a toilet brush. Back of the seat, underneath the seat, under the bowl, and around those stupid bolts that always have loose caps to them. Our Coxn used to walk into our bathroom and take a deep breath to give us the hint. If it doesn’t smell clean it’s not clean. Chemical smell and potpourri is not clean by the way.

Kitchen.

Same principle, start at the top and work your way down. Two buckets. This includes cleaning around the trash can under the sink. Just because you can’t see the top of the fridge doesn’t mean there’s nothing on top of the fridge. When you’re done, take a paper towel with a dab of mineral oil and wipe your stainless steel sink and faucet. If you have an induction stove soap and water and a cloth are good enough, wipe it down well and the fucker will shine like a mirror.

Laundry

If you’re with a girl, you’ve seen the standard scenario. A giant mountain of clean laundry while she roots through it every morning for something to wear. Eventually the pile mixes with the dirty stuff and it all gets washed again. Theres tons of good videos on proper folding of towels and sheets and hanging clothes in the closet so I won’t waste your time here. The point is it’s your house and you give a shit, even if she doesn’t. I wouldn’t bother folding her clothes if she can’t be bothered. Put em in a trash bag or a laundry hamper and throw them in her closet to deal with later. You will get grief on this but fuck it, if she folded her bras it wouldn’t be there. You’re not joking because you have a house you can be proud of and you take care of the shit.

Living room

Same as everything else, start at the top and work your way down. Less water is better because you want to pick up the dust, not turn it into a paste stuck to the wall. I love a damp dry mopping of the floors but I have wood floors, carpet people are on their own.

Finally, whats the point of all this and why do I care about Landry when my wife is a bitch and won’t fuck me?

Notice how almost nothing in this so far is about your frigid wife, other than to get her lazy laundry out of your way? It’s like a metaphor or something. Ideally if you’re with a harpy who doesn’t provide any value to you, with the exception of a 9 month uterus rental why in the hell are you putting your happiness on her, waiting to do something for you? She’ll let you down, and on purpose. She doesn’t care. Perhaps you should care, hence why you have a spotless house, folded towels and a clean living room. You’ve spent god knows how long on being resentful of her being so disengaged that you’ve allowed yourself to wallow in your own misery and filth.

So you’re running Dread, you’re washing your ass, dressing better, working out etc. So many guys still have their head up their wifes ass in some stupid covert contract where they put themselves in the position for her to judge his self improvement and whether it’s worth a little duty sex that month. Fuck that. Your keeping your house and hygiene up to standard because you’re living like she died last year and this is how you live if she wasn’t there.

If you’re doing this right, she may not be.

Ideally, after a year of looking hot and handling all your shit you’ll look over at frumpalumpamus and think:
‘Why the fuck is she even here?’ and you’ll finally start to realize you’re the fucking prize. A fully self actualized man who has his shit together and plenty of women would like to get to know better, and you’re wasting your time watching someone take it for granted. It makes you mad and you do something about it.

And if you’re one of the ones whose wife or girlfriend realizes that she will either step up or be pushed aside? Well the next time she mandates some stupid ritualistic cleaning hoops for you to jump through you won’t be bleaching or cross contaminating your sandwiches with raw chicken anymore. I guarantee there are guys outside, right now who are looking absolutely ridiculous with ineffective quarantine-ready feel good measures filling their houses with panic.

Guess whose broke right now for spending 80 dollars on toilet paper? Guess who is so timid that their wives dried up like the Sahara? Guess who isn’t the oak in their home and keeping their families actually safe instead of ‘feeling’ safe?

Be that guy if you want, but from what I see, guys who have their hygiene squared away and their heads on straight tend to have wives and girlfriends who are calming down their co workers who are filled with all kinds of panic. It turns out that by being the hygiene alpha male that the shit ripples to the social circles around you. I know my woman stopped watching the news, calmed down plenty of married beta-male co workers and no longer tries to bleach my food.

It’s not about being clean, it’s about belling deliberate and knowing your standards.

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Post Information
Title 60 DoD 2020: Week 3 Hygiene; or why it's about more than washing your ass.
Author RStonePT
Upvotes 74
Comments 33
Date April 15, 2020 5:01 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit /r/MarriedRedPill
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/MarriedRedPill/60-dod-2020-week-3-hygiene-or-why-its-about-more.653432
https://theredarchive.com/post/653432
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/g1vxqk/60_dod_2020_week_3_hygiene_or_why_its_about_more/
Comments

[–]simbarlionMRP APPROVED8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Nice tie to leadership, cannot agree more. Do it because:

a) you want to do it

b) you want it done

Simple

[–]johneyapocalypseTold Death to Fuck Off - MRP is easy mode / MOD10 points11 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

Stoney, regarding this:

So you’re running Dread, you’re washing your ass...

Red advocates undergoing a routine oral-colorectal cleaning, provided by one's partner, every morning.

Don't you agree, this advice is perhaps a bit unwise during a pandemic?

Regarding pandemics, is what red said true? You can indeed wash your hands in soap and water, but for maximum hygiene and covid-killing efficacy, you should place your hands in your partner's ass for 30 seconds while singing happy birthday three times?

Lastly, red was wondering how many chapters of your new book are focused on the anus and further, how many instances of the word rectum appear in chapters two through five?

p.s. With regards to the specifics of your post, someone (red) said that sticking a shower brush handle up your ass while performing standing overhead press is the key to developing strong deltoids, growing hair on your chest, and enjoying a bountiful life of fruitful hygiene. Is that true?

p.p.s. Woohoo (!) on the book. Good job. My dollars will be supporting you.

[–]NeoTheJuanDJ5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Regarding pandemics, is what red said true? You can indeed wash your hands in soap and water, but for maximum hygiene and covid-killing efficacy, you should place your hands in your partner's ass for 30 seconds while singing happy birthday three times?

False, using an Aztec Death Whistle while being elbow deep in that ass Will sanitize you to brand new proportions. Next level shit.

[–]RStonePTOfficial Counterfeit Goods[S] 4 points5 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

I think I missed the inside joke on this one... I'll put the asspiracy in with all the other covid conspiracies.

[–]johneyapocalypseTold Death to Fuck Off - MRP is easy mode / MOD5 points6 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Red has become the ass-champion of mrp lately, doing a fine job of educating our masses on the glories of the colon. Clearly you were too busy writing books and making youtube videos... nice numbers lately by the way... to notice.

So when you say the 22nd, where does it come out? Amazon? Anywhere else?

[–]RStonePTOfficial Counterfeit Goods[S] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Amazon for now. I have to Kobo and some point and the print editions on hold for another week cause it'll never get delivered in this shit.

I'm recording the audio starting next week and going to print a limited ten run hard cover edition for my boys in Patreon as a thanks.

That's the plan anyways, because for a moment there I thought I'd be done once it's done.

Fun fact, not sure who screwed us over, but Reddit doesn't allow you to place ads on marriedredpill or askmrp

[–]SorcererKingMRP SAGE - MRP MODERATOR3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Fun fact, not sure who screwed us over, but Reddit doesn't allow you to place ads on marriedredpill or askmrp

That's good. That means we undermine their worldview AND cost them money. Hooray!

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMRP MODERATOR1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Very cool. I’ll be getting it when it comes out.

[–]RStonePTOfficial Counterfeit Goods[S] 11 points12 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

And if anyone is curious. Yes, the book is finished and it's going to be out on the 22nd. I send out any updates on it via emais

Enough spam, lets see if I did this right or if dirty assed motherfuckers are gonna argue how cleaning the toilet won't get them laid or something equally obtuse

[–]SBIIIMRP APPROVED Ballbuster14 points15 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

"And now, following today's program on hygiene, here is a short message from our sponsors"

[–]RStonePTOfficial Counterfeit Goods[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lol, fuck off bud 😂😂😂

[–]UsefulWalk4Priming the Pump a Little1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

This write up was really solid. Count me in as one book sold, based on the quality of this hygiene post.

I'm gonna go wash my ass now.

[–]RStonePTOfficial Counterfeit Goods[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I cuss a lot, be warned

[–]UsefulWalk4Priming the Pump a Little0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Great, that'll make it a better fucking read.

[–]Balls_Wellington_Wrong.2 points3 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

Hygiene question, what are you guys doing about your hair during quarantine?

I was overdue for a cut when the shutdown started, I look straight raggedy now. Hesitant to buzz cut because I have big ears and don't want to look like a chimpanzee.

I have a nice enough beard trimmer to do a buzz cut if it comes down to it.

[–]SBIIIMRP APPROVED Ballbuster7 points8 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I gave my boy a haircut last week with a hair trimmer and a scissors - stuck on a youtube video and followed that. Turned out fucking amazing, but then again, I'm half metrosexual so it was always on the cards that I'd make a good hair stylist.

[–]Balls_Wellington_Wrong.2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I just said fuck it and gave myself a buzz cut. Not perfect but better than it was.

[–]stoicstephenLittle Ant-man1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I did a buzz cut too.

I have a nice beard so it looks good (imagine Tom Hardy style), in fact I look way better now.

This will problably be my style from now on.

[–]RStonePTOfficial Counterfeit Goods[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Letting it grow and styling it like a boss.

Better get yourself a pomaide or somethin

[–]resolutions316!!CAUTION!! Runaway bus potentially ahead2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I got a one handed head buzzer. It’s cordless, and curved so it fits the curve of the head.

I hit it every 2-3 days. Not as good as a straight shave, but way faster. Never looks like I just had, or need, a hair cut - Patrick Bateman style.

[–]UsefulWalk4Priming the Pump a Little1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I talked my stylist into giving me her last haircut before she shut down. She was literally packing up her stuff when I was leaving. Hoping she'll be back in business before I need to go again. She might be working from home, so I'll pay her a visit if she is. If not, I'm leaning toward a buzz cut with a beard, see if I can pull that off.

[–]UsefulWalk4Priming the Pump a Little1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

By the way my wife offered to give me a hair cut. HELL FUCKING NO. It's not like she has any idea what she's doing.

[–]Balls_Wellington_Wrong.0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

I let my wife help with the buzz cut for the neck and behind the ears. That doesn't take any more skill than mowing a lawn.

For a real haircut, no way.

[–]UsefulWalk4Priming the Pump a Little0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm sure she couldn't screw up a buzz cut very badly. Also has the benefit of being able to reach and see the back of you head.

Getting a real haircut from you wife seems like one of the worst ideas ever.

[–]BootySlayer9112 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

This is probably the best ass wash article of 2020

[–]RStonePTOfficial Counterfeit Goods[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Stiff competition and cutthroat peers really help hone the skills

[–]UsefulWalk4Priming the Pump a Little0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I would say it's certainly the greatest ass wash article of the 20's!

[–]BarracudaRPMRP APPROVED / Dreadful '190 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy Link

If you don’t care and she does, her feelings will eventually trump your knowledge. This is why nagging works, it taps into the ambivalence of men.

This is huge - I've never thought about it like that. Our ambivalence (or, the ability to be okay with Plan A or Plan B) is an asset, but it can come back to bite us if we allow her nagging to erode our decision.

My girl fought it, for a while. Most kids do that when their usual tricks don’t work. They amplify them assuming they aren’t trying enough, then eventually give up if you’re consistent.

Exactly - and it really can be that simple. Wait, I thought we were talking about washing asses? Stoney's giving away the secret sauce in the middle of a post about bleach.

The point is it’s your house and you give a shit, even if she doesn’t.

You're keeping your house and hygiene up to standard because you’re living like she died last year and this is how you live if she wasn’t there.

Damn this is good. This may be even better than "If you were single tomorrow, how would you lift/act/work/dress, etc.". This is living the GO Plan as though the Stay Plan weren't an option. I wonder how many of us would actually clean our own toilets, if it were suddenly left up to us and the kids to do it? I'm reminded of this profound advice that was written on MRP, somewhere: "Live as though your father were already dead." A bit morbid, perhaps (and I'm one of those lucky enough to still have a healthy father). It reminds me to live like the patriarch - to seek only my own approval, to be my own emergency fall-back plan, and to grow into that role for my own children.

after a year of looking hot and handling all your shit you’ll look over at frumpalumpamus and think:‘Why the fuck is she even here?’ and you’ll finally start to realize you’re the fucking prize. A fully self actualized man who has his shit together and plenty of women would like to get to know better, and you’re wasting your time watching someone take it for granted. It makes you mad and you do something about it.

QUIT READING MY DIARY (Edit: NOT saying I'm actualized or arrived. I still have shit to work on, plenty of it. But I've been moving in the right direction for a long time.)

hygiene is about giving a fuck ... Giving a shit about the little things means you give a shit about the big things. It’s counter intuitive until you actually do it, then it’s god damned instinct.

"What are you trying to tell me? That I can wear sweatpants?"

"No, Neo. I’m trying to tell you that when you’re ready, you won’t WANT to."

[–]RStonePTOfficial Counterfeit Goods[S] 1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

It's common AF. I'm watching friends who seem to he going along to get along in their marriages.

Very easygoing with very controlling wives. I notice they also talk about their kids like escapism. I mean all my family having friends love their kids, but it's watching them talk about it like Morgan Freeman is narrating it.

I don't know what it means and may be looking too much In to it

[–]Over60_FireTempered3MRP APPROVED1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I notice they also talk about their kids like escapism. I mean all my family having friends love their kids, but it's watching them talk about it like Morgan Freeman is narrating it

You not only looked briefly into the abyss, you described it well. While you are not sure what it means, the importance and relevance did not escape you. Once upon a time, as children, we knew, only to relearn these things as adults, if we are lucky. (Ralph Waldo Emerson also noted this.)

[–]RStonePTOfficial Counterfeit Goods[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Jesus that's terrifying.

[–]Over60_FireTempered3MRP APPROVED0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yet, bloops find comfort in looking away...

[–]Maximus_Valerius1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

There’s no game in going along to get along.

I say no sometimes just because there is entertainment value in watching the response. And emotional tension is a great byproduct.

Going along kills tension and erodes boundaries. It’s the Nice Guy thinking that he would rather get along so he can live a problem-free life. Plus it’s easier for the Nice Guy to let the controlling wife take the lead and make all the decisions.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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