If you are pained by external things, it is not they that disturb you, but your own judgment of them, and it is in your power to wipe out that judgment now.

Marcus Aurelius

Butthurt-itis can be boiled down to a very simple formula: 

Ego + Expectation - Fulfillment of Expectation = Butthurt-itis.

Let's look at Ego first. Ego is your enemy. You should be working on killing that little shoulder devil lying to you that you're special. This is one of my favorite TRP articles to re-visit. It is a great ego killer to remember that you are 1 of billions and in a 100 years, most, if not all the things you’re accomplished will be forgotten. Sounds demoralizing, but I love it. It frees me from the shackles of judgment and helps me formulate a healthy perspective.

Ego you should be working on killing; Expectations you should be working on managing. It's ok to have expectations. It's good to have them if fact, but it's important to manage them properly. If your 200lbs overweight, you should not have the expectation of winning a gold medal in the 100m dash.....

If you manage your expectations properly you're less likely to have them go unfulfilled.

The real key is to separate Ego and Expectation. I expect my wife to fuck me on the regular, but if she doesn’t I don't get butthurt. Why? Because my ego is not tied to whether or not she fucks me. It's hard to separate the two if you're still a fagot, but that's where managing your expectations come in. If you're obese, you should probably lower your expectations. Own the fact that you did this to yourself and make changes. She still may not come around once you're Chad, and that's ok. Again, your ego is not tied to her.

I'll give one quick anecdote, but realize this same principal applies to most situations: Money, Sex, Shit Tests, etc.

This was the last "argument" we had and it was on shark week. I don't even remember what all the fuss was about, but I know she got upset because I called her out on some BS she was spouting. Many times I let things like that go by keeping my mouth shut, but I was in the mood so I called her out. She got mad and started fussing at me. I kept pushing and eventually she call me a piece of shit. I could have gotten butthurt and listed all the reasons why I wasn't a piece of shit. Instead I laughed and said she was dumb for marrying a piece of shit. From her point of view I'm a POS because I called her on the carpet and made her feel bad. From my point of view I'm a great dad, and a good husband. For her to call me a POS is ridiculous and I responded as such. No butthurt-itis in site.

A situation is just that. A situation. Your estimation of it is what determines if you get butthurt or not. That is not to say we don't all fail sometimes or lose frame. If you do, let it go and get back on the horse. Like everything, it gets easier with practice.