As a simple reminder, here’s the previous 4 posts – which you should read first.

If you live with a woman who is depressed or anxious, you know how crippling it can be at times just to be happy. Despite every effort to expand your masculine energy into everything around you, it may even feel wrong inside of you somewhere deep down to pursue your own happiness in spite of her moods. You would like her to come along with you, but let me tell you something you may not know – she has built a prison around you that you’re not aware of. In order to free both yourself (first) and her (if she is willing to follow her captain), you must discover your mission in life.

First, let’s talk about what a mission is not. A mission is not a goal. Goals are measurable and attainable. A mission is nearly unattainable in your lifetime. Missions create goals. Goals do not create your mission or your highest purpose. You can even have multiple missions in your lifetime, or change your mission anytime you wish. Your mission and greatest purpose is something that speaks to your core from deep, deep within.

This post came about in a unique way. I was asked the question – Could I elaborate on discovering your mission? How does one find what your most core desire is in this world?

You cannot force this:

Forceful mission seeking does nothing but push your core desires deeper into the depths of who you are and replace it with a facade of ego. To discover your mission and your core desires they must rise organically to the surface once all ego is bare.

How does this tie into your depressed and anxious wife?

You have allowed her to build an invisible prison through her moods that prevents you from discovering your highest purpose and mission. Yes, that’s all your fault.

It’s through your authenticity and deep passion of a life purpose that everyone around you (also likely including your wife) will feel that permeate through the man that you are through your actions and minimal words. Those daily actions and words align to a man who is congruent to who he truly is. Words simply become a tool for achieving your mission through actions. And you know what? People see right into that, through it, and into you. You are a man living out real truth in the flesh.

I think for us to discover that mission we must spend a lot of time in solitude and suffering. I'm no Buddhist, but that dude was onto something with suffering. Suffering bares your core to the surface, you must face it with courage, and you become stronger because of it. A man should choose the truth of himself when faced with his darkest fears.

Discovering your mission will require all your strength.

Using the power of the little boy inside of you:

Do you remember back when you were a little boy and you wanted to explore? Did you ever look beyond the fence of your backyard and think, "I wonder what's out there?"

What do you think that fence symbolizes?

To me, it symbolized constraint. The fence of your backyard as a young boy - or whatever boundary your parents told you not to cross, that was the end of your adventure. You were bound within the confines of that little imaginary prison. Everyone told you not to do things outside of that prison: your parents, your siblings, teachers, whoever. They were also told the same things as young kids by those same people which perpetuates the cycle of the prison mentality.

One of the most brutal mental punishments that I can think of is solitary confinement with no escape. This is your wife’s mind. Your wife has built a prison of emotions that want to trap you inside of her head because she gains great feelz and validation from not having to live in solitary confinement. It is a very difficult life alone. I mean, who would want to live like that? Certainly not your woman. As a man it is impossible.

Can you break free of that prison and by example show her that is possible with the gift of your masculinity?

I began to think about this heavily over the last 6 months. Why couldn't I hop that fence as a boy? There were rules, that's why. I'd be a bad boy if I did that. I'd get an emotional punishment that would hurt my core. But why was my desire to escape that prison so fucking dear to my core, yet punished when I embraced it?

Because I was a boy, who is now a man, and I wasn't designed to live in that prison. The masculine’s deepest desire is freedom and release. Release from contraints in the form of a beautiful woman to look at, the wonderful sound of children laughing, breaking the sound barrier into the unknown, or ejaculation. I was designed to be free. To jump that fucking fence of the prison and do whatever I wanted. Sure, there were rules - but I should be my own judge of what was safe or not. If I was wrong, I'd have to live with the consequences. You have to be willing to live with whatever consequences YOUR choices create.

I remember reading about Teddy Roosevelt as a kid and thinking he was a badass. He traveled the world hunting dangerous animals in the early 1900's and in some cases nearly died. He has a quote I love: "No, I'm not a good shot. But I shoot often." That man had no prison. The world was his. He took every shot he could, missed a lot, but at the end of the day he still took his shot at freedom and escape.

Think of men that you admire. What about them made them badasses that you respect? I bet you it isn't a dude sitting in his mancave. Or a guy painting pictures. It's also likely not some great philosopher or one-track-braniac. It's likely a man that had a sense of adventure and wholeness, and often did it in solitude in the face of adversity. Can you think of a few? Louis and Clark? Arnold? Churchill? Steve Jobs? Who was a man that you admire?

Find something that you can do in solitude that allows you to be with only you and your thoughts.

Using the power of femininity to find your mission:

The light, the dark. The masculine, the feminine. To me, there is balance in it all. To find your true masculinity that is a mission and your greatest purpose, I believe you must surround yourself in that which you are not seeking to polarize your mind. You are seeking direction of a greater purpose which is an entirely masculine quality.

More specifically I seek out solitude with something feminine - like creation (such as art or music) or nature. I'll give you a few examples that will hopefully move you to your own discovery.

Do your best to draw the lines of this analogy as we move forward.

I grew up hunting, a very masculine thing indeed. I spend a lot of time in the woods alone, by myself, where I am my own judge. I scout for animals, look for sign and try to outsmart them. Yes, I also kill them. All masculine. But killing is not the goal, it's simply part of the journey. Once the animal is dead, I have to harvest it, clean it, butcher it, pack it, freeze it, and get it home to feed my family. Killing is only a small part of it. But if you're like most still in the prison - they can't look beyond the fence that is killing to see the adventure it gives a man. They focus on the fence and say, "Don't do that, it's bad." Again – the prison.

Everything up until the killing part is surrounding myself with the feminine (nature) and dancing this delicate dance with my masculine. I must truly understand the ways of the feminine in order to achieve my masculine goals. I fail a lot. Hell, yesterday I shot and missed because I got anxious myself and pulled a shot right. No matter how much I practice, I still fail. Nature won that day, but I'll be right back at it. I love the challenge.

When I'm out there, I have nothing to do but be with myself. I could read, yeah. I could facefuck my phone too, yeah. But I don't. Because I know that the sense of adventure of where I go, where I setup my hunting spot, and what I do is entirely 100% up to me. There is no prison in that (except for a few rules to keep me somewhat safe which I agree with).

You must physically see that there is no prison. There are many ways, but nature does it for me.

I also seek this time out for myself for the solitude – and create my own personal prison in my mind. I let it all surface while alone. I cannot tell you the number of times I go out there for just 4 hours alone and end up crying my fucking eyes out thinking about my life. Do you want to learn how to kill your ego? This is just one way that has forced me to do so.

I once killed a large animal very deep in the woods. It was a 10 mile round trip hike to pack it out, and it took three trips. On my last trip I was exhausted, it had been dark for hours, and I had to sit down to rest. Then, my flashlight ran out of battery. The modern comforts of this world were lost. Here I was – in the dark – covered in blood in bear country. I was frightened. But I had no choice… I had to break free and accomplish my goal of getting back home. So, I wandered in the dark scared for my life for 8 more hours. I felt relief in the sun finally rising against the cold darkness to complete the cycle of polarity, and through that solitude I discovered I was stronger than I ever knew.

It’s just like lifting, bro. That's solitude in the face of adversity as well. That's why MRP recommends you lift.

I hope this helps you build some more mental models to reference for yourself.

And by the way, if you ever want to take up hunting - just ask a guy you know. I guarantee he will jump at the opportunity to show you the world through his eyes and teach you exactly what it means to connect with yourself in such beauty. We also enjoy surrounding ourselves with the company of other men. We want to free others from the prison too.

Shedding Ego

Open yourself by shedding ego to allow your mission to come to you. It will, as all good things do. When it does come walking by, claim it as your own by harvesting it and grab that motherfucker by the horns with pride as you raise it as your trophy. You've earned it with all your hard work. Put it on the wall as a reminder of the adversity you have overcome.

You know, kind of like hunting.

When your woman sees this great authenticity of a purpose driven man that you’ve built from your core outwards, she will either accept this as who you are or she will not. But that, my fellow man is un-testable, and gives her the opportunity to begin to free her own ego as an example of your leadership.