As some of you may know I spent the last 5 days moving my family to a new and bigger home. We have tons and tons of stuff to move. Stress and just plain worn outedness was at its highest levels since the divorce. Emotionally and physically.

Our first major issue was that Budget canceled our truck a mere 12 hours before we were picking it up to move. This causes a complete meltdown on her part. I get a little visibly stressed too, because oh no, we cant move everything in my pickup truck before we have to vacate. She starts going off the deep end about this and that specifically related to how I was responsible for the truck and now thats not going to work. She keeps asking me what we are gonna do. I specifically lock eye contact with her and assertively tell her "Relax, you keep boxing items and I am going to go make a few phone calls". Long story longer, I eventually find a truck but we have to pick it up far away. She starts bitching about that. Then proceeds to tell me how to handle. No thanks woman, this is mens bidness, I will call this other number I tell her with a smile and a chuckle. Bewm, 24 ft truck and I can get it in two hours. This means two trips, but with them being on the only game in town, there is no time to be picky. She starts to calm down and comes up to me and says she loves me, hugs me, and apologizes for her behavior. Thanks me for handling it. Shit test averted. We go get the truck and instead of hovering around me the entire time I wait in line, like she would normally do, she instead shops around the store while I get everything done. This may sound weird, but normally she is right over my shoulder making sure I do everything she wants done, and in the way she wants it done. This was a big step for her, and I am proud she passed it.

Fast forward to the next morning. Moving day. Get compliance tested, but fuck it, the amount of work she has to do she deserves something nice. Instead of hostess donuts she would like me to go and get real donuts from Daylight or wherever, but I do this after I load the box pile from the garage without informing her. She asks me what took so long and I tell her slyly "Had to wake up the baker to get you the special fruity pebbles donut". She knew damn well I was in the garage loading boxes, you could hear me banging around in there but dont bother to answer the shit test. I inform her, my son, and the two guys who show up what their jobs are. Ask me if you have any questions at all. We have awesome donuts (rare treat at the ranch) and everyone get's to work. Throughout the day I can hear a couple of times the helpers asking the wife things, and you know what she does? Please ask my husband. Where did this woman come from? Not even four months ago she would have been bad mouthing me for not working hard enough to anyone that would listen. Or worse, flirting with the helpers.

Moving day progresses. As mentioned we are not around each other very much. She has her girlfriend helping her, and the few times I could hear them it was "Hubby this, Hubby that" in good terms and "Hubby said" blah blah blah, so maybe even in private things are improving for her. I expect the usual relationship talk between the ladies, but from what I know that has improved as well. Even if it didnt, I still respect her privacy and would not bring it up. Or worse, hamster it and beta the whole thing up. There is some more beta behavior during the day from me to her. Specifically her blood sugar (diabetic) and she dont watch it as close as she should. So a few times during trips we make stops and I tell her we stopped so she could get some carbs, whether she thinks she needs them or not. I do need her healthy to clean and pack boxes. She dutifully gets candy and drinks each time without sass.

Day is coming to a close, the truck is about to turn into a pumpkin. Lot's of things still need to be done. Wife is offering a million suggestions on what to do next. I inform her to set course 220 degrees, and steady as she goes. I setup the timelines and what gets done and what just isnt going to happen. Send each vehicle off in a different direction. She is a little pissy I didn't take her idea of going back to the old house, but we had new stuff to pick up by 8pm or we had to wait till Tuesday to get the furniture. We kind of need a dinner table and chairs more than we need old christmas decorations. Just ignored and did not respond to her. Got in the moving truck and left.

Now we are back home. Just her, my son, girl, and me. She is super tired and super stressed but some things just have to be done. Number 1, I need my beer cold. This goes without saying, heh heh. Do you remember the scene in the matrix where the agents all fired at Neo and he just sticks his hand in the hair and the bullets stop and hit the ground? She threw me maybe 20 shit tests in a span of 5 minutes. That was me. Almost literally. Each one that pops up, A&A/Ignore, non stop. I go to putting the beds together and entertainment centers. Give you a quick run down on the stream of shit tests that happened.

Her: You dont need to get the cable going, we need beds.

Me: No, the girl and my son will form a tribe and eat us in our sleep if they dont get spongebob.

Her: You need to get the entertainment center setup for the kids first.

Me: Sure, and the cable delivers this things called "motion pictures" for the kids to view.

Her: What the fuck is your problem?

Me: My only problem is my penis is unoccupied. (thanks /u/IanIronwood for that one)

Her: Just get the kids stuff done first please.

Me: Not right now, cable is giving me an enticing challenge that I wont let it win.

Her: Stop it with the god damned cable, we needs the kids taken care of first.

Me: (silence and I leave the house to work on the cable)

Cable is all cut, and I have to repair and all kinds of stuff. Turns out the cable was never working because she didnt get the cable service moved properly. I didnt throw that into her face or anything, just loaded DVD's for the kids.

Her: You ever going to get the cable fixed?

Me: Yep, and then I will use the leftover cable to tie you up.

Cable gets repaired, move to entertainment centers. Havent told her yet to call comcast.

Her: It's already 9pm, the kids need to get to sleep.

Me: Yeah, I probably shouldnt have gave them redbull 10 minutes ago.

Her: Very funny

Entertainment centers are now setup. (its 1010pm) About 15 minutes before this she is getting the kids changed into sleep clothes. Yep, my 9 year old son still has mommy get his pj's. Ive broke most of the dependence but gotta choose the right battles at the right time. The entertainment center is setup and now I am working on the master bedroom bed. At this time I ask her to call comcast and find out why the self install box says service is deactivated. She gets pissy calls, turns out its all her fault. I let it slide. I take over the phone call, write down everything that needs to be done, and ask her to call and handle it on Monday.

Her: The kids are ready, I hope your finally done jacking around with repairing the cables.

Me: Entertainment centers and kids beds were setup 10 minutes ago, put the little munchkins to sleep so I can wear you out.

Her: Not tonight, im way too tired and sore.

Me: Ok princess, Ill fluff your pillow and give you turn down service.

Her: (Smiles as she turns away)

I go downstairs as its 11pm and I am pretty worn out. This is not all the shit tests, but it gives you an idea of how the wife is once she gets very tired and stressed. The tests of my shit literally flowed from her like water. Guess what I find? A cold beer poured into a glass, my newspaper prepped for me, and a towel for my sweat. Very nice. I get up and get her a wine cooler and before she would turn me down cold but now she drinks and comments how she managed to finish 3/4 of it. Time for bed. Get in bed and I don't know what happened, but I hit the pillow, and said "Good night and sweet dreams" then woke up at 730am. She told me she reached over and touched me to wake me up for sex about 10 minutes after we got in bed. She said I didnt even move so she went to sleep figuring I was tired. I was. OI ftw.

Next morning we get up and instead of any shit testing. She goes to make my coffee (something she has just started to do on her own) and I thank her. Take it with me upstairs and proceed to hang all the toilet paper holders and curtain rods. Everyone is busy doing something. Even got little ones to move boxes upstairs. Thank god for youth, because one more box up them stairs and I might literally die. Didn't let on that I was worn out too. She kept saying things like god this box is heavy and I would go down the stairs and grab it, and take it up the stairs. She would make comments like I am so glad you are working out now. I am still overweight, but my strength and stamina are noticeably improved.

She comes up around 11am or so and asks me to come to the bedroom and cuddle for a minute. The moment I hit the bed with her its all game and touchy feely big time for about 30 seconds. I just get up and close the door. She is protesting because lots of things to do, the kids, but I just push her down onto the bed. Unbuckle her pants. She stops me. Gets up and proceeds to get all the way undressed. Lays down on the bed and I just go right to intercourse. She is soaking freaking wet. 30 seconds of foreplay and light game didn't cause that. Afterwards she asks to cuddle again, sure, sex is rewarded right? Comments that we are pitiful because she cant even go a day without me inside of her. No reply. Just wrap her up in my arms and cuddle. Whisper that I love her very seductively in her ear.

Rest of that day is uneventful. One final shit test of the evening. Since she didn't get the gas service turned on (she boned that one up too) we had to shower at friends. It's about 830 and I have work tomorrow. She tells my son that we are picking up food to take home. No thanks. I want to sit down and eat, not stand eating over a sink. We go to a restaurant and it closes in 30 minutes.

Her: We arent eating here. They close in 30 minutes. The buffet will be all old food.

Me: (Matter of factly) We are eating here and if it's old we will eat it and then get a refund. Free food is the best.

Everything at the restaurant turned out great. The place was busy and we got all the hot food we wanted. Got home that night and we did some minor things. Informed the wifey that "I will be retiring to the couch for the evening after fixing these two toilets". She says thank god, because she is worn out too. Curiously, she only kept going because I was. Get downstairs to a cold beer poured in a glass, her with a wine cooler, and we sit and talk into the wee hours of the night about moving and how much better this house is.

TL;DR

I handled this super major event in our lives the way I wanted it. Complete opposite of my beta years. Previously would have deferred everything to her whims. This time if everything was going to fuck up, at least I owned it. She resisted a little but got to see her captain handle business. She was integrated into the process and stepped up as a really true first officer. The ship hit rough seas and I guided it through the storm.