This weekend Wife and I were out running errands, as is quite common. Instead of the usual "Where do you want to go to lunch?/I don't care, wherever you want" game. Or, the boring just-go-where-we-always-go. I pulled into a new place. Wife likes familiarity, and immediately shut down the idea with "I don't want to go here/It will take too long/It might not be good" whining.

I zipped through the range of responses I could think of:

  • Placate: "Oh my bad, I'm so sorry, let's go to $Your_Standard_Place." Nope, fuck that. Bluepill me might have done that.
  • Rambo: "Sit in the car then." Nope, I'm not an asshole.
  • Butthurt: "Fine, let's just go home then. Pffft." Can't show butthurt.
  • Stoic: "K". And go to the next errand. This was my choice.

I wasn't sure how it was going to play out, but for the next two errands before we got home, I consciously withdrew affection and attention, as to not reward bad behavior. I wasn't rude, but felt no need to drive the conversation either. I let silences sit long and let her be uncomfortable. I answered questions but did not bring up new topics. When we got home, I unloaded and put everything away, but didn't engage. I also immediately left the house to go for a run, and simply Not Be There.

I went about my afternoon doing my thing, focusing on me, and enjoying it. This is where it gets different. She stands up, takes me to the bedroom, gets naked, and initiates sex. She gets nicely fucked, and afterwards she makes one offhand comment about, "maybe that will make up for me not wanting to try the $New_Place today." Keep in mind I had a huge DB for years. She gets positive attention for the rest of the day.

Takeaways:

  • Women are FAR MORE AWARE of subtext in communications than men are. Use it.
  • Never show butthurt. For anything. Just roll with things. Always prioritize yourself first.
  • It's not my job to entertain her. I'm not a fucking clown.

Errata:

  • I've lost a lot of bodyfat. It shows. It's awesome.
  • I'm dressing better and looking better.
  • I'm busy with things in MY life.
  • I'm owning more shit.

TLDR: Wife shot down lunch suggestion, I withdrew attention and she initiated sex later that day.

Improvements: Yeah, I still measure MRP success by the amount of sex I'm having. I'm doing better at not caring if I get laid, because I know things change quickly and I will get laid soon. I still think too much about the interpersonal dynamic between us as I absorb MRP stuff, rather than it being purely reflexive. I'm getting much better, though.