Tonight some things clicked.

We're doing a major renovation to our home so we're staying with my wife's sister and husband. It's not great.

The renovation has another 4 months to go but some things were finished today. I went over to have a look and wasn't happy. There were some details missed in the work and I decided I needed to speak to the contractor about it.

My wife asked me what I was looking for and when I told her the Framers business card, she asked why. I told her things weren't in line with my expectations. She asked what my plan was and I said, "call him, tell him to fix it"

"Don't do that, they're already behind and blah, yammer, blah, moan".

And here's the click. Normally I would take the frustration from the fuckup on the job site and direct it at her. And we'd fight and well, that sorta fight you either lose or, well, you just lose fights with women over shit like that. They don't fight fair and honestly, a fight without a real prize ain't a fight I'm looking for anymore.

Before I said a thing about it, I just walked past her.

"Where are you going??!?!"

"To the house"

I believe I heard, "but what about dinner" as I closed the door.

I went to the house and called the contractor. He came by and the two of us hashed it out. Like men. Project somewhat delayed as a result but it's back on track in terms of end product. He also knows that I'm watching the work and won't tolerate shitty workmanship. If I wanted average quality, I would do it myself.

2 hours later, I'm still on the site, cleaning some stuff up and I hear the door close. Wife walks in. Plate of food.

"You need to tell me why you're so Angry with me"

"I'm not"

"why the hell did you just walk out?!?"

"It wasn't a place I wanted to be. I had things to do and so I came here to do them"

the golden silence...broken by the sound of a squeaky wheel starting to turn

"did you call the contractor? what did he say? how pissed is he with us?

a kiss on the forehead

"it's taken care of"

"I brought you dinner ya know"

Old me would have said "no thanks" in that butthurt, childish tone.

"awesome, thanks". it was delicious.

She smiled and said she'd see me back home.

Now this is the part where a guy in my stage of development would say,"and then I got my first great hummer in a month!" or "ANAL, BOO YA!!"

But I'm not. It's not bed time yet and quite frankly, if I get turned down, for the first time in my entire time on this planet, I honestly don't give a fuck.

thanks guys.

tonight I learned what STFU really means. I doesn't literally mean to close your mouth and not communicate. It means to say as little as you can. To stay out of those choppy waters.

again, thanks guys.