Absence diminishes minor passions and inflames great ones, as the wind douses a candle and fans a fire. - La Rochefoucauld

Summary

Your time is a commodity and has value. As you withdraw yourself your value will increase. This has to be done in stages (see the levels of Dread) or it will not work appropriately. If you are currently a drunk captain you need to have enough physical presence in your home to let your wife see that you are changing. This means you are verbally absent from her arguments, at times emotionally absent, but physically present enough to re-establish your role as the family leader. The 48 Laws of Power says "The need to withdraw only comes after you have established your presence; leave too early and you do not increase your respect, you are simply forgotten."

The MRP Man needs to apply verbal, emotional, and physical absence.

Verbal

One of the cardinal rules that MRP encourages newcomers to abide by is "STFU". The reasons why this works are several. First, most toxic leaders/drunk captains have been engaging their wives in all manner of verbal warfare. For a Man this yields zero results. For a woman it may yield low results in terms of the spousal relationship, but it yields positive results when viewed under the looking glass of how women operate.

For reference, Illimitable Men maxim #57: “Men control an interaction by being non-reactive. Women control an interaction by being hyper-emotional.”

and

Maxim #58: “Women feed off excess emotion, men tire from it..."

and

Maxim #59: “Women thrive on drama, it allows them to weaponise emotion and push an agenda. Starve them of emotion, and they have nothing to fight with. A woman starved of emotion will become desperate to sustain her psychological onslaught."

To sum, women will control a relationship by over-reacting, and a man's subsequent reaction can give her additional emotional value that conditions her to continue a verbal onslaught. This is coupled with her loving drama of any sort even to the point that she will facilitate and create drama (cut off her nose to spite her face) to get a dopamine rush that she is programmed to crave (see Body Agenda in Married Man Sex Life Primer).

"STFU" won't earn you any points in the game of LTR, but it won't accrue any penalty points either. The most likely and immediate benefit is that you won't say anything you regret AND you can eliminate much of the fuel that is causing the fire on the LTR ship. Verbal absence during arguments ("STFU") won't remedy all issues, but it is a simple principle that can immediately yield results.

We live in a modern era where it is possible to reach (and harass/nag) anybody at nearly any time, day or night. A continuation of being verbally absent is to place your cell phone on silent OR turn it off altogether. Many recommend turning it off and checking it only at lunch time, or before you drive home. You don't need to respond to 99% of the texts that your wife sends you. Too many men fall into the trap of engaging in verbal warfare with their wives via text. It's an argument you cannot win and a huge waste of time.

Emotional

You have read "Women are the gatekeepers of sexuality. Men are the gatekeepers of commitment." Truer words have not been written. The card women hold in a LTR is sex. They will weaponize it and use it against you. Indeed, a large proportion of MRP followers are those who originally sought solace in the dead bedroom sub.

The gatekeeper principle is a RP truth, but it holds special significance to the MRP community because the majority of us are in a LTR with a woman who would rather have our commitment than be forced to face her SMV head-on as she searches for new provisioning. That is, most of our wives have passed the wall and would be far worse off in The Sexual Marketplace than we would be.

Therefore, commitment is a powerful tool in our relationships. Those new to MRP should internalize the concept that "they are a prize" and that their time is valuable. The next step is to understand that true commitment requires an investment of time. Nothing is free, everything has value, and a MRP Man has many projects and tasks which require his time and attention. A MRP Man has to pick and choose where he places his time. A MRP Man has no time to give commitment to a wife who has weaponized her sexuality in any form. A MRP Man will learn outcome independence and abundance mentality. At first he may have to fake this; as he follows the steps it will become his reality.

Emotional absence is one of the most profound actions a man can take in his LTR. Emotional absence is not a tool for "payback" or to put your wife in her place. Those may be natural consequences, but emotional absence simply reminds her of the fact that you are too busy to be emotionally invested in a relationship that is lop-sided, psychologically demeaning, and does not create value in your life. Again, for newcomers they may have to fake this. Nice Guys will have difficulty with this, but eventually it will become a reality.

Physical

Dread has been covered ad nauseum in MRP. Everybody is playing the dread game, even if you aren't aware of it. There are 12 stages of dread (as outlined by /u/bluepillprofessor) and each has it's place depending on the needs of the relationship. Dread is simply putting the fear into your wife that you have other options--that you will not be held emotionally hostage by her.

Dread Level 3 says "Begin to build a life apart from your wife. Join a club. take up a cause, discipline, or calling. Get busy."

This works for several reasons. From your standpoint it makes you happy. It forces you to find (or renew) passions and hobbies. It knocks your wife off the pedestal and fills your day with things that keep you physically and emotionally busy. This is all very good.

From the vantage point of your wife, following Dread Level 3 will take you out of the home. You may be in the garage, or at a friend's house, or at an art gallery, a museum, a softball field, a sports bar, a movie theater, or any other number of places. But where you aren't is at home, watching TV, and under her thumb. You will be physically absent (and therefore verbally and emotionally absent as well). If you are always physically present you will become a habit. If you are new to MRP then you likely already are. Your wife sees no value in you because you aren't going anywhere. You are always there, and you will be there tomorrow. If you starve her of your presence you can start her hamster thinking that she might lose you for good.

The 48 laws of power points out that "Giving no reason for your absence excites even more: the other person assumes he or she is at fault." Let her hamster work for you.

An MRP Man needs to be busy. He is busy because he is handling all the things that are required to run a good ship. He is making money. He is investing his time in hobbies. He is cultivating a masculine frame by lifting heavy weights. He is engaging strangers is masculine conversation. He is a high value target and acts as such.

If you are new here, now is the time to fake it until you make it. Get out of the house, if only to sit in a parking lot in the car and read the sidebar books. This will be more beneficial to your marriage than you reading the same book while sitting at home.