Starting a little early, Welcome Rollo Tomassi Everyone!

Rollo-Tomassi · 2016-09-30T18:47:39+00:00

OK, haven't done one of these in a while, but I'm Rollo Tomassi, the author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine.

I've been the proprietor of The Rational Male blog for 5 years now. Before that I was a moderator on the SoSuave forum while I was also double majoring in Fine Art and Behavioral Psychology (personalities study emphasis).

I'm not sure how much of an introduction I need since most of my work has been part of the Red Pill on TRP and everywhere else I can think of in the Manosphere.

So, ask me anything.

Just a forewarning though, I may refer you to a link on TRM if I think it explains or answers your question more in depth than my c&p'ing it here.

Fire away.

spexer · 2016-09-30T18:58:16+00:00

Hi Rollo

What are your thoughts on the divide between TRP and MRP?

Specifically, The Red Pill appears to be anti-marriage and often receive negative press that is.... at times, deserved- when the lower quality posters give advice with such venom and callousness.

While here at MRP, the majority are not against the marriages we find ourselves in, and consider solutions to help them succeed. This place has a greater focus on building better men and self improvement, where TRP is more focused on PUA.

So the final musing would be... should MRP look at a different brand to be associated with, as the "red pill" moniker has become so unwelcome?

Dream_21 · 2016-09-30T18:54:54+00:00

Hey Rollo

Curious if you have any thoughts to share on marriage privatization.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marriage_privatization

That is, removing government from marriage, leaving it to be a private and/or religious ceremony. Government's only involvement being to enforce contracts, if any were drawn up, similar to a prenup now.

Children are the biggest issue that comes to mind, but obviously there is more involved.

One element could be the effect on security needs. The woman gets the ceremony, social appearance, and function of marriage, but not the heavy hammer of government when she gets unhaaaappppyy.

alltrueism · 2016-09-30T19:17:34+00:00

Rollo,

Do you see any correlation between men with depression and being raised in an era of modern feminism?

We only need to look back as far as our grandparent's generation, where it seems men could not afford to have mental problems like ADD, depression, and anxiety. So what has changed?

Awake-Now · 2016-09-30T19:43:53+00:00

Rollo,

I'm a 41-year-old divorced father with a 9-year-old daughter. I've read The Rational Male for a few years now and I've spent about the same time over at Athol Kay's site. What advice would you give regarding raising a daughter in today's society?

RedBeorn · 2016-09-30T21:18:27+00:00

One question I often see asked is: how can a man find a suitable long-term partner to raise children? Understanding that women are as malleable as hot wax to a man with frame, it is still important to select a woman that won't give too much difficulty while imprinting your frame. Suggestions for such a woman include:

The younger you can find her, the better
Find a girl who respects her father

among many others.

Do you have any tips to help men who are on this quest?

Archwinger · 2016-09-30T21:08:21+00:00

Hi, Rollo.

I've always found your work to be very high-brow, intellectual material. Which isn't a bad thing--It's great for educated guys on the internet, like the MRP crowd, to slowly read, think about, and digest. But a lot of it might be too out there or too in-the-weeds for some average, Joe Middle-class Six-pack-on-the-weekend dude who works 12-14 hours a day just making ends meet to read and digest in his spare time.

If you could hand a few pieces of concise, immediately actionable advice to Joe Normal-guy, some unhappily married guy who's slaving his life away at work to support an ungrateful shrew of a wife, what would you tell him?

AustinMilbargeGLG20 · 2016-09-30T20:02:55+00:00

Thank you for your time, Rollo.

My question is, for a newbie who is in the process of unplugging, how do you recommend dealing with one's self in a marriage where the wife is wholly engrossed with the kids, never attempts to entertain the idea or possibly of alone time? What complicates my early studies is the fact the 2 of my 3 kids are disabled, so my wife is in mother mode overdrive and seems to hold little interest in me, regardless of whether I pay attention to her or simply focus on myself (which is what I'm learning to do).

javiexprime · 2016-09-30T20:12:23+00:00

What's your advice on how to tell my wife I'm not ready to have kids yet?

Context: I'm 29, married for 3 years, and over the past few months have been going through my own MAP while evaluating my relationship with my wife. She has her mind set on having kids before 30 (~ year) while I'm still figuring out if by changing myself I can be happy in our relationship or if I want to separate before we commit to much time to one another.

My current challenge is how to tell that to her without setting off a nuclear bomb. I'd def like to be a father someday but don't know if I'm ready now.

Cheers

Rollo-Tomassi · 2016-09-30T18:23:09+00:00

Also, a list of the questions we've collected during the week in here as responses to this sticky

blass_aster · 2016-09-30T19:52:48+00:00

Millennial generation is prone to extreme attention seeking behaviors partly due to social media and college pickup culture. How do you think this will propagate as we age?

Thanks

Rollo-Tomassi · 2016-09-30T18:58:19+00:00

Thank you for all your hard work.

I don't know exactly how to word this but, how much do you think your studies in Behavioral Psychology have shaped the message you put out? Do you believe that it explains why we are taught the opposite of how to engage in a romantic relationship or at the very least exposes that we are being taught incorrectly? What would you say to others who would like to study Behavioral Psychology?

648262 · 2016-09-30T19:18:00+00:00

Hey Rollo,

You spent a lot of hours on SoSuave back in the day. Another person who spent time there was Pook. What are your thoughts on him and his writings, and any idea where he went to?

Thanks!

blue_dover · 2016-09-30T20:41:04+00:00

Hey Rollo, what do you see as your legacy after Rollo Tomassi is gone? What happens to the Rational Male when RT is no more? Have you given any thought to that?

Ps. Apologies for the crudeness.

Rollo-Tomassi · 2016-09-30T18:15:22+00:00

Making this a container for all thank you posts, or other non-question comments. See if we can keep this clean for rollo to wade through.

bogeyd6 · 2016-09-30T20:45:05+00:00

Hi Rollo!

Many many who have unplugged tend to reach plateaus or in better terms hit their stride. Here at MRP we get our attitudes, bodies, and frame built properly and it's easy to say you never stop. Therefore it would seem that at some point you can say you made it.

reborn_red · 2016-09-30T22:52:54+00:00

Good evening from the UK, Rollo.

I am soon to become a father to my son. I'm fairly young and recently found MRP and your writings.

As a father yourself, can you recommend any books or trust worthy sites/blogs that have assisted you, during fatherhood?

Thank you.

blue_dover · 2016-09-30T22:54:42+00:00

Hi Rollo [again], Do you think that Red pill awareness is contextual in terms of location, ethnicity and/or religion? Or is red pill awareness the same for every man? I remember you saying you want to keep your content areligion, apolitical and aethinc.

We have had a lot of posts about minorities having trouble navigating the SMP and wanted to know your take if the redpill may benefit some demographics more than others and if so how those guys can bridge the gap

Rollo-Tomassi · 2016-10-01T10:41:59+00:00

[permanently deleted]

ned_harriman · 2016-09-30T20:54:34+00:00

One thing that you've (perhaps for good reason) not touched on very much in your writings yet is the whole "enjoy the decline" aspect. Having read most of your stuff, I believe that you see opportunity, not fatalism, in TRP. You are raising children in a redpill marriage, and perhaps would align with TheFamilyAlpha in that sense.

However, no one can deny that bluepill relationships and marriage are causing economic and cultural destruction (unless you are stupid and believe the broken window fallacy). The rate of bluepill destruction will only increase as guys go herb #becomingjapanese or MGTOW or unplug and go PUA/platespinning (most unplugged end up doing down this path).

What's going to happen if Clinton and some of her radical policies get into office? Some are saying she's going to do for sex relations what Obama did for race relations. How do you see this playing out?

dregofsociety · 2016-09-30T21:03:07+00:00

Is there any point to getting married? It seems like a neverending uphill battle and the younger you are, the harder it will be.

iamz3ro · 2016-09-30T21:35:58+00:00

Rollo, do you think the heterosexual white man has a future? You saved my life (essentially) and I thank you so much.

RPSigmaStigma · 2016-09-30T22:23:45+00:00

Hey Rollo.

I hope I'm not too late.

My wife is high-functioning, "quiet" BPD (borderline personality disorder). We've been together for about 12 years, married 5. You've said you majored in behavioral psychology with an emphasis on personality studies. I don't know much about the technical distinctions between various sub-fields of psychology or if "personality studies" includes personality disorders, but I do know there are a lot of men struggling through relationships with personality disordered women. These men are in dire need of some solid, actionable guidance. The typical BP-ish literature on BPD consists of either "just leave" or a bunch of sappy, pitiful attempts to invoke sympathy for the PD partner, and I would say that about 75% of it is written by women, for women, and written from a "victim" perspective.

I think TRP applies especially in PD relationships, but since psychology is deeply steeped in the FI, most of the advice just doesn't work for men. But these men are often not open to TRP, either because so much of it is written from from a single-man's perspective, or runs so counter to the BP literature on PDs that most guys will assume it doesn't apply or won't work. If you have a chance, just skim through /r/BPDlovedones to see what I mean.

Anyway, I know I've been rambling, but I guess my question is, do you have any insight or experience with personality disorders, and if so, do you think you would be willing to develop some sort of theoretical framework of TRP geared towards the specific demands of a PD relationship?

BluepillProfessor · 2016-09-30T23:23:46+00:00

Hi Rollo:

I want to thank you and Athol Kay (May Peace Be Upon Him) for saving my life and my marriage.

I would like you to address the difference between writing for the PUA vs. LTR/Marriage. I found the biggest problem was that with PUA you can simply apply routines, but in LTR/Marriage it is very much more difficult to come up with a one-sized-fits-all category.

You have written some pieces in the LTR and marriage genre but I think it is fair to say you have generally shied away from this topic.

Why? The world can use your input on this important but ignored genre!

BluepillProfessor · 2016-10-01T00:00:33+00:00

When do you expect your new book to come out and do you have a title yet? Can you tell us more about what you are working on?

Mukato · 2016-09-30T18:52:09+00:00

Hello Rollo, I've been reading your work and loving it.

What are your thoughts FFM threesomes? My wife is open to the idea (we discussed it before I found MRP), but I am not sure how that would effect me as I work on my MAP and eventually start working up the dread levels.

Rollo-Tomassi · 2016-09-30T21:44:33+00:00

Sincere Thanks for all you have done...opened my eyes and my friends. Purchased numerous copies of your book

Dream_21 · 2016-10-01T00:26:38+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Rollo-Tomassi · 2016-09-30T22:36:56+00:00

I'm of the opinion that alphas are born, not made and that trying to become an alpha is futile and will just end up leading to frustration. Instead, I prefer to think in terms of becoming a high value man, which unloads the expectations quite a bit.

In other words, I believe that you can still be a high value man, without being an alpha.

What are your thoughts on this?

Rollo-Tomassi · 2016-09-30T18:40:31+00:00

Rollo, love your work, what are your thoughts on Open Marriage? I do not have one, but could see it developing that direction. The wife and I both travel 5-6 days a week for work. I could easily be plating a few right now but don't for reasons. I should add, both of us are financially independent (make over six figs each), no kids, and we have FFM threesomes about once every two months for the past 2 years. I don't think it would bother me academically that she has sex with a guy or girl on a business trip if I am doing the same but is this Blue Pill/Foolish thinking?

2016-09-30T22:50:49+00:00

Now that you have joined the ranks of us empty nesters, do you have any thoughts about the RP specific problems that older men, even past 60 such as myself, will have in their lives and marriages. Many of us, by virtue of just living longer and stronger, encounter issues that may require just a little different approach. Your thoughts?

xiko · 2016-10-01T02:36:59+00:00

Do you think that men that weren't hurt deep by a woman can really take the red pill?

Title	Starting a little early, Welcome Rollo Tomassi Everyone!
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	79
Comments	138
Date	September 30, 2016 6:13 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MarriedRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/5598qg/starting_a_little_early_welcome_rollo_tomassi/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MarriedRedPill/starting-a-little-early-welcome-rollo-tomassi.199503 https://theredarchive.com/post/199503