I once had a mentor well skilled in various fighting arts. He once told me (ad-libbed) "When a person has a weapon they put all of their energy, concentration and faith in that weapon. When you take that weapon away they are now lost. Don't put your faith into a weapon that can be taken away." Your body, strength, intelligence, instincts, and willpower are your weapons.
A woman's weapon is withholding sex and divorce-rape. Everything else is noise. Take away those weapons.
How funny is it that men all over the world put up with a harpy cunt who won't fuck when her only weapons are to remove her shitty presence and continue to not fuck them? Seriously, what weapon does she have? It is all smoke and mirrors if you are a man of value.
Divorce rape? Yeah, if you've fucked up to the point where you are now a prime candidate for divorce rape, then that sucks. But, what's done is done. Sunk cost fallacy applies here. In your mind, take half your shit, everything that you will "lose" in divorce and bury it 6 feet under. Consider it gone. Money is a tool, you can always get more. Don't let the fear of losing something as arbitrary as money allow you to squander the limited time you have in this life.
"I spent my life unhappy because I was afraid I would be unhappy if I lost money." and "I don't want to piss off my wife because she might give me even less sex than the non-existent amount I get now." Sound pretty fucking ridiculous, don't they?
You are the only person who has power over you. Be the master of yourself, use your weapons to shape the world to fit your vision. If your wife doesn't fit your vision, give her the tools to adapt or send her packing. If you are doing this right there is no negotiating, no arguing, no conflict. If you are upset that it is raining do you yell at the clouds? No, clouds DNGAF about your feelings, you are operating within their frame. Your choice is to stay out in the rain or leave, the cloud is going to do what it does either way. Be the cloud.
You are going to live a life with as much quality sex as you want, spending time with people who are respectful and add value, and doing things with your time that make you happy. If she wants to be a part of that vision then great, if not, great. She has no weapons, you have all of the weapons, use them.