Disclaimer: I also posted this in another community and I hope it is ok, if not I will remove it. Due to the sensitivity around feminism it is sometimes difficult to communicate this to larger communities.
Other disclaimer: I am for giving the equal rights and conditions so that it is fair for women and man and so that both can thrive. I am just against the perpetual conflict that I have been living with a feminist and misandrist at home.
So, for the issue:
So, I (29M) have been for over a year with my (30F) ex girlfriend. We had a good chemistry. However, on a lot of things I could see we cannot align. At this time I have feelings for her and I am hurt but I am thinking it is for the best.
She has acute resentment for men. She had a bad experience when she was little and sees a therapist about this. I told her I condemn this and I will always be here to listen and try to help as much as I can.
However, this + her stereotypes on men are really making me burn out. As examples: if I ‘explain’ only something to her (which. She also does to me) I am accused of mansplaining. Whenever a man talks to her, and if it ends bad, she assumes it is because she is a woman. I told her it can happen, because misogynists exist, but it does not have to be always the case. She says it is because men in general will behave this way and think of women as objects. I tell her that I do not like these shortcuts of thought because indirectly she is including me in this. She won’t change her way of seeing things. The other day we had a fight and actually this time she attacked me just for being a man: we could bot go late somewhere so I did not want to go butt she wanted to go without me. I kindly asked of we could make a plan the two of us instead, since it was originally the plan (dance class every friday, and she showed up 40 minutes late after the beginning of the class). She answered that she would go without me anyway and that I should not give her orders high was NOT the case and NEVER my intention. When I confront her too that she mentions that us men think we can give orders to women. I did not know what to answer. It has become unbearable and I think we broke up. Ah, and before breaking up, she told me since I am not a feminist she does not see a future with me. She was also saying things like: “if I come home and I tell you a man spoke badly to me, for sure because I am a woman”, what would you say? I said it might be the case because misogynists exist but please try not always see it this way right? To which she answered that I am not feminist. Oh and btw she used this “is this because you are a white man’ a lot as a rhetoric. When it is completely random.