I keep settling for lame, mentally-ill women with commitment issues who don’t treat me well.

eenbrickson · 2022-10-29T19:24:26+00:00

How recently did you and your ex split? In my anecdotal experience I only truly healed from a toxic relationship after around a year and a half. Closer to two years if I’m being honest. The period of time following a bad breakup is when you are the most emotionally vulnerable.

You have to give yourself time moving on, too many guys rush into the next thing without reflecting on what you learned and what went wrong (or right!).

The romanticized version of these women you have in your head is a result of trying to find something to replace what you lost, but it sounds like you have a lot of self awareness about that.

I can’t emphasize enough how important it is to reflect on what specifically you are looking for before trying to date again. Be honest with yourself about where you are emotionally and give yourself time to move on before distracting yourself with other women.

I don’t know how helpful this is but I know the emotional impact a bad breakup after a toxic relationship is. It’s a trauma event, give yourself time to process it.

eyecebrakr · 2022-10-29T23:55:51+00:00

One thing I learned about myself is that when I was attracting and attracted to unhealthy women, the universe was telling me something about myself.

MisterBroda · 2022-10-30T01:03:21+00:00

My recommendation is to try to be fine living alone. I am convinced you can't be in a happy, lasting and healthy relationship unless you have no fear of being alone. It helps you setting boundaries and respecting your partners boundaries.. even if it means splitting up because you realize you two don't belong together.

Maybe yu have a life goal or a hoppy you can persue and improve yourself? Try aiming for something like that first. Sure you can date along the way.. but if you see bad behaviour don't shy away from saying "sorry.. but I think we are looking for different things". See your self-worth and stand up for it

Savagemaw · 2022-10-29T21:01:05+00:00

The minute any womam becomes sexually inavailable the relationship is over or needs a hard reset. If a woman can get what women want out of your relationship without providing what men want, she will abuse you. Sex is non-negotiable.

teufelinderflasche · 2022-10-30T12:57:45+00:00

Are you meeting women online? The proportion of mentally ill women is way higher.

Title	I keep settling for lame, mentally-ill women with commitment issues who don’t treat me well.
Author	PickleJewler
Upvotes	23
Comments	16
Date	October 29, 2022 6:01 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	/r/MenSupportMen
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MenSupportMen/i-keep-settling-for-lame-mentally-ill-women-with.1137415 https://theredarchive.com/post/1137415
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/mensupportmen/comments/ygqd38/i_keep_settling_for_lame_mentallyill_women_with/