Sorry for the length, and for any formatting.
So, in the past, we had joked about her making an onlyfans and selling feet pics for extra money. We've made the joke many times over the past couple of years, and honestly, had that been it, I wouldn't have even cared.
This past Wednesday morning, before she left for work, she confessed to having one, which I thought was a joke at first. After a couple of minutes of awkward silence she asked what I thought, which was the first time it hit me that she was serious. I asked her how long she had been doing it and she replied with "A couple of days, I've made about $50." I asked what kind of content she was putting up there and she replied "I'm not showing my asshole or anything." Which I thought was am odd and vague answer, and I said that. She stated "Just lingerie pictures." I asked "So like, lingerie pics. Are your tits out?" which was met with a resounding "No!"
She again asked how I felt. I told her it was kind of weird, and I wished she had talked to me about it first, but if she wanted to do it, I wouldn't stop her, but I didn't want her putting nudes on there or messaging people. She said that sounded fair. It was about time for her to leave for work, so the conversation ended there.
She works all day and I work all night, so we go a couple of days without really seeing each other but in passing pretty regularly. The next time we had a chance to sit down and talk was Thursday night. I asked her to show me the page, just so I knew what was being put on there. She showed me, and took me to her feed. It's important to note here, I don't have any experience with the site, so I didn't realize the feed and her landing page were different. The feed seemed okay. A handful of lingerie covered boob pics, a few pics with some toys, but again, no nudity. I did see the messages tab and pressed it, it was empty. Everything seemed to be on par with what she told me. She also told me that it didn't make her feel good like she thought it would, so she was gonna stop. I told her that it was up to her at this point.
Then came Friday. I felt like there was more than what she was telling me, and thought it was weird that in her feed there was posts from the official OF page. I was alone with my thoughts, and they kept pointing at she was lying. So I did what any reasonable man would, created a fake onlyfans account and subscribed to her page.
As you can guess, I was met with more than what I was shown the previous night. The banner at the top of her page was her in the shower, tits out obviously. I scrolled down to look at her pictures, and it was pretty much what I had seen the night before, but I did notice that she only posted on days I work. I do rotation, 7 on/7 off, and she was posting daily or more when I worked, none when I was off. Also, the dates of the posts that were "a couple of days" were spanning over two and a half weeks. I also noticed a tab labeled "Archive" and clicked on it. That's where the fun began.
I was met with a handful of bare tit and ass pictures with full captions and kiss faces and such. She wasn't "showing her asshole" but only cause she wasn't quite bent over far enough, barely. This set me off in a rage. Do I wake her up at 4 a.m. and yell? Do I catfish her with this fake account? Do I try to remain calm and talk to her? It was a harder decision than it should've been, but I tried to keep my cool and waited until Friday night to talk to her.
The abridged version of the conversation went as follows:
Me: Let me see the account again.
Wife: I deleted it.
M: Let me see anyways.
W: (huffs and hands over phone)
M: So, smaller thing, but you told me you had only been posting for a couple of days and this goes back to almost 3 weeks.
W: I honestly didn't realize it had been that long.
M: Also, why didn't you show me your landing page instead of just your feed? There's stuff on there I didn't see.
W: It's the same stuff.
M: (Goes to landing page with banner) I didn't see this picture the other night.
W: It was there.
M: (Scrolls down to where a new picture had been posted) I didn't see this picture either.
W: You said you didn't care if I kept doing it.
M: but you said you were done, if you were going to continue, you should have told me. You also told me you didn't have any pictures with your tits out.
W: I don't, I'm not confident enough to post stuff like that.
M: (Press the archive button to pull up the nudes) what are these then?
W: Those are deleted, I put them up and immediately deleted them, no one can see them.
M: (Texts her photos of the nudes I seen from my account) Nope, anyone can see them. I also don't think you immediately deleted them. One is from the night before you told me. My guess is you freaked out after you told me and archived the bad ones, and purposely only showed me the feed so I wouldn't see these.
M: "Sure" isn't really an answer, is that what you did or not?
What proceeded this was an argument where how everything I had ever done is what led to this. I hit an upvote and commented on one bikini picture on reddit, so I made her feel self conscious. A female acquaintance would occasionally comment or like my Facebook posts, so I must have been running around with this girl who lives 4 hours away with her boyfriend. Also, she said she didn't see a difference in OF and when she was a stripper a while back. I told her it was different because we talked about it beforehand and had ground rules set. She quit stripping because she couldn't adhere to the rules we set up (I didn't want to hear about her grinding on guys and no solo parties at a guys house, she broke both of those).
I also asked her who all knew that she was doing this. It was her sister, her mom, and two friends. I told her I did not want any of them around, at least for a while, because they knew and must've thought that I was a fucking idiot for not knowing. She said she understood, but then invited her sister to come trick or treating with us, and waited until we were at the meet up spot to tell me her sister was coming.
Like, I get the want for validation, and quite honestly, had she been upfront, I would have supported her, with some basic rules in place. Am I wrong for being pissed? Am I wrong for not wanting to be around the people who knew? I don't really have anyone to talk to about this, not without adding more people who think I'm an idiot. I don't know. I just needed to get it off my chest before I did something stupid.
If you read this far, thank you. I'm open to feedback, but mostly just needed to put this out there.