Just because some men behave in a toxic fashion, that doesn’t mean masculinity is to blame
Ironically, the men most women are most attracted to are the men who behave in that fashion. Natural selection in the human species is eliminating all the nice guys in favor of the assholes. Hypergamous women abandon good men and screw them over in divorces just so they can date men who will treat them badly. So they lash out at the world by coming up with immature memes like toxic masculinity and they continue to deny the reality that the female sexual instinct is dysfunctional.
I have two examples of my own (both true stories and worth reading if you have the time).
When I was 22, I dated a girl for several months (hot enough to be on the cover of magazines). We had a great relationship, great sex, etc. But after a few months she told me she was going to start dating this other guy who asked her out. She didn't know him very well, but she had a crush on him since they rode the school bus together in eighth grade, so she couldn't pass up the opportunity to date him. He was a cocaine dealer and he carried a gun, the typical bad boy type. He dressed like he had money, acted arrogant and travelled to California "on business". I was just a boring college student at the time, and she had no interest in college. She thought she was moving up in the world by jumping from me to him. About ten days after she broke up with me to date him, my phone rang at about 3:00 in the morning. It was her. She sounded all nervous and was talking really fast because she was coked out. She told me she had broken up with him. He was really weird and made her uncomfortable. He showed her off to all of his friends, but he never touched her. They slept in the same bed together but never had sex, not even once. This girl was incredibly hot back then, but he never laid a finger on her. When she told him she wanted to break up with him, he freaked out and went walking around her parents' upscale neighborhood shooting his gun into the air. She told me all of this on the phone that night. Yup, she left me for a guy like that. I know I could have dated her again, but I couldn't take her seriously after that. Like most women, she dated him for the image that she imagined him to have, but not for the real person who he was. I found her on social media years later and she said she was sorry for what happened back then. She is a single mom now.
A few months later I started hanging out with another girl in college who quickly became my best friend. We started dating a few months later and got married about a year after that. Things were great. We had the dream relationship that everybody envied. But after we graduated, she hated her teaching job, became really discontent and started going on shopping sprees and running up credit card bills which caused a lot of fights between us. She would spent each night drinking alone by herself in a room in our house and always wanted to be alone. She changed drastically in a period of about three years. I no longer wanted her to be the mother of my children. She blamed me for her discontent, divorced me and immediately started dating a Brazilian guitar player. He seemed much more exciting than I did. I was responsible, but he was from another country and he played guitar on a stage (for which he earned free beer). My ex-wife and I kept in touch and I would call her a few times per year. She had a kid with that guy and they travelled to Brazil to show off their one-month old son to his parents. The last night they were there he went out partying with his old friends and didn't return until early the next morning. About a year after that, I happened to be talking to her on the phone one afternoon. It was the strangest coincidence that she was on the phone with her ex-husband at the moment when her doorbell rang. She said, "Can I call you back? The federal marshal is here." She called back a few minutes later, livid, screaming, "That motherfucker!" over and over. When she finally calmed down, she told me the federal marshal had delivered an international child support order from Brazil. It had the name of the woman who filed it and the name and birth date of the child. He didn't go out with his friends that night when they were in Brazil. He was with his ex-girlfriend. My ex is still with that guy. He is now the guy she ignores while she drinks alone in their house. He never has a job. Over the years, I heard about all their fights, their lack of a sex life, their financial problems, etc. I'm glad I didn't have kids with her. She is just another example of a woman's dating instinct ruining her own life.
Ah, yes. Perhaps I should have written, "mother of my future children." In the beginning, I had looked forward to raising children with her. But after she changed and I saw how neglectful and irresponsible she became, I reconsidered. She and I never had kids. Ironically, years later I discussed child rearing with both of these women. Both of them used the exact same phrase, "kids are overrated."
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Ironically, the men most women are most attracted to are the men who behave in that fashion. Natural selection in the human species is eliminating all the nice guys in favor of the assholes. Hypergamous women abandon good men and screw them over in divorces just so they can date men who will treat them badly. So they lash out at the world by coming up with immature memes like toxic masculinity and they continue to deny the reality that the female sexual instinct is dysfunctional.
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I have two examples of my own (both true stories and worth reading if you have the time).
When I was 22, I dated a girl for several months (hot enough to be on the cover of magazines). We had a great relationship, great sex, etc. But after a few months she told me she was going to start dating this other guy who asked her out. She didn't know him very well, but she had a crush on him since they rode the school bus together in eighth grade, so she couldn't pass up the opportunity to date him. He was a cocaine dealer and he carried a gun, the typical bad boy type. He dressed like he had money, acted arrogant and travelled to California "on business". I was just a boring college student at the time, and she had no interest in college. She thought she was moving up in the world by jumping from me to him. About ten days after she broke up with me to date him, my phone rang at about 3:00 in the morning. It was her. She sounded all nervous and was talking really fast because she was coked out. She told me she had broken up with him. He was really weird and made her uncomfortable. He showed her off to all of his friends, but he never touched her. They slept in the same bed together but never had sex, not even once. This girl was incredibly hot back then, but he never laid a finger on her. When she told him she wanted to break up with him, he freaked out and went walking around her parents' upscale neighborhood shooting his gun into the air. She told me all of this on the phone that night. Yup, she left me for a guy like that. I know I could have dated her again, but I couldn't take her seriously after that. Like most women, she dated him for the image that she imagined him to have, but not for the real person who he was. I found her on social media years later and she said she was sorry for what happened back then. She is a single mom now.
A few months later I started hanging out with another girl in college who quickly became my best friend. We started dating a few months later and got married about a year after that. Things were great. We had the dream relationship that everybody envied. But after we graduated, she hated her teaching job, became really discontent and started going on shopping sprees and running up credit card bills which caused a lot of fights between us. She would spent each night drinking alone by herself in a room in our house and always wanted to be alone. She changed drastically in a period of about three years. I no longer wanted her to be the mother of my children. She blamed me for her discontent, divorced me and immediately started dating a Brazilian guitar player. He seemed much more exciting than I did. I was responsible, but he was from another country and he played guitar on a stage (for which he earned free beer). My ex-wife and I kept in touch and I would call her a few times per year. She had a kid with that guy and they travelled to Brazil to show off their one-month old son to his parents. The last night they were there he went out partying with his old friends and didn't return until early the next morning. About a year after that, I happened to be talking to her on the phone one afternoon. It was the strangest coincidence that she was on the phone with her ex-husband at the moment when her doorbell rang. She said, "Can I call you back? The federal marshal is here." She called back a few minutes later, livid, screaming, "That motherfucker!" over and over. When she finally calmed down, she told me the federal marshal had delivered an international child support order from Brazil. It had the name of the woman who filed it and the name and birth date of the child. He didn't go out with his friends that night when they were in Brazil. He was with his ex-girlfriend. My ex is still with that guy. He is now the guy she ignores while she drinks alone in their house. He never has a job. Over the years, I heard about all their fights, their lack of a sex life, their financial problems, etc. I'm glad I didn't have kids with her. She is just another example of a woman's dating instinct ruining her own life.
[–]ruifaf 7 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]MRA-automatron-2kb -3 points-2 points-1 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[+]Tchulkaturin-18501 points [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
Ah, yes. Perhaps I should have written, "mother of my future children." In the beginning, I had looked forward to raising children with her. But after she changed and I saw how neglectful and irresponsible she became, I reconsidered. She and I never had kids. Ironically, years later I discussed child rearing with both of these women. Both of them used the exact same phrase, "kids are overrated."
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Just because women are toxic doesn't mean toxic masculinity isn't a real thing.
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Not everyone. Putting everyone into a box is doing nobody benefits, as you should hopefully know.
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So what would you like to call toxic behavior that is confined to male or female? Naming aside, it's a real issue on both sides.
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She’s a chameleon.
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