Telling men "IF you didn't want kids, then don't have sex" is same as telling women "if you didnt want to be pregnant, then keep your legs closed"

I have seen many people say "men should pay child support, because if they don't want kids, they shouldn't have sex."
Well what about abortion? Does the same go here? "women shouldn't have right to abortion because if they don't want kids, they shouldn't fuck"
Weird how that is seen as wrong...

Also one woman said "Why should women use birth control? that harms their body, men can just sue condoms" Well because condoms aren't that trustworthy..
She also said "Men should just get vasectomy"
so let me get this straight, women shouldn't be obligated to do anything to prevent pregnancy, and they should still have right to not be forced into parenthood, but its men's fault for not wanting to "harm their body" and that's why they should be forced into parenthood?

The double standard is big here

I got banned from a discord server for saying that men shouldn't be forced to parenthood, and they said "it's their fault for not using condoms." But what about the woman? How is not her fault for not asking to use condom? Or not using birthcontrol?
THese same people also said that men aren't even obligated to pay child support, but i got banned before being able to give any proof