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The idea that women are "bigger victims" than men is a harmful, antiquated gender norm that promotes toxic ideas in society

December 27, 2020

If we want to talk about harmful gender norms, we can find plenty that affect both men and women. I don't think there's any reason to assume that women are harmed more, especially when most of these gender norms are just two sides of the same coin (with one prominent problem being the fact that we all but ignore the side that affects men).

If we want to be consistent and honest, I think we need to look at this phenomenon where women are assumed to be the "bigger victims". Which itself is probably one of the biggest and most widely accepted gender norms in society. It's why we have a "women first" attitude pretty much everywhere, including in discussions about equality and gender norms. And it harms both men and women in the real world.

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Title The idea that women are "bigger victims" than men is a harmful, antiquated gender norm that promotes toxic ideas in society
Author Oncefa2
Upvotes 1816
Comments 147
Date December 27, 2020 4:33 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit /r/MensRights
Archive Link
Original Link
Top posts by Oncefa2

[–]Eleutherlothario 173 points174 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

As soon as you start discussing which group is harmed more, there is a tacit agreement that it matters. It doesn't.

Help those who need it. Period.

[–]Vaultdweller1001V 92 points93 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

It should matter more. When 10,000 boys are kidnapped/killed manspreading is more important to society, but when 500 girls are kidnapped, society launches a global campaign to stop it

[–]problem_redditor 82 points83 points 2 (5 children) | Copy Link


That entire Boko Haram case was so crazy. The world went nuts about the kidnapping of the Chibok girls, but nobody seemed to care about the boys that Boko Haram kidnapped and killed. I know that a lot of people here have watched The Red Pill and know about Boko Haram, but the situation was actually far more egregious than it was presented even in that movie.

While the world focused on Boko Haram’s kidnappings of women and girls, they were stealing an even greater number of boys. Over a period of three years, Boko Haram kidnapped more than 10,000 boys and trained them in boot camps in abandoned villages and forest hide-outs. They physically and psychologically tortured them and forced them to commit atrocities on behalf of the terrorist group.

"In many camps, boys hardly old enough to hold guns were taught how to shoot. Thirteen-year-old Modu said that in his former camp, they practiced firing at planks of wood. Elsewhere, boys shot cows or goats. In Rachel’s camp, older militants took young boys on trips into the countryside to rob herdsmen of their cattle. For even minor infractions, militants beat boys nearly unconscious, or denied them food and sleep for days, former captives say."

Boko Haram literally went from village to village kidnapping thousands of boys. They tortured them, indoctrinated them, and then forced them to commit horrendous acts, from assault to murder to rape. The boys were also often subject to that violence themselves, and they often had no way out. Even when these boys escaped, they were at risk of being killed by the fucking Nigerian army themselves because the boys were viewed as "irredeemable" monsters and not deserving of rehabilitation or help.

They not only kidnapped boys, but they killed them too. On 29 September 2013, gunmen from Boko Haram entered the male dormitory in the College of Agriculture in Gujba, Yobe State, Nigeria, killing forty-four students and teachers. "The extremists rode into the college in two double-cabin pickup all-terrain vehicles and on motorcycles, some dressed in Nigerian military uniforms, a surviving student, Ibrahim Mohammed, told the AP. He said they appeared to know the layout of the college, attacking the four male hostels but avoiding the one hostel reserved for women."

They did this again in February of 2014, when Boko Haram terrorists attacked a boarding school. They killed dozens of boys but apparently spared the girls, telling them to flee, get married, and shun the western education to which they were privy.

Later in 2014 Boko Haram raided Nigerian villages. They shot residents to death and burned down homes, and they seem to have targeted men and boys. According to CNN: "The attackers, who posed as soldiers, told residents they had come to protect them from Boko Haram and asked them to assemble. They singled out men and boys and opened fire on them," Biye said.

A local leader in Attagara village, who fled to nearby Madagali town in neighboring Adamawa state, said the death toll was staggering. "The death is unimaginable. We have lost between 400 and 500 people in the attacks in which men and male children were not spared,” said the local leader, who asked not to be named for security reasons. “The gunmen pursued on motorcycle people who fled into the bush in a bid to escape and shot them dead. Even nursing mothers had their male infants snatched from their backs and shot dead before their eyes,” the local leader said.

A report by Oxfam in August 2016 noted that thousands of men and boys were killed by the terrorist group Boko Haram in north-eastern Nigeria - far more than women and girls. In an Oxfam protection survey with communities affected by violence done last year, people reported 41% more killings of men and boys by Boko Haram than of women and girls; and the number is even higher among adults, with 77% more men killed than women.

"Those who survived the mayhem, often men and boys of fighting age, were captured and taken to Boko Haram bases, to be trained as fighters or to serve as Boko Haram members, taken to Sambisa forest and other remote areas, never to be heard of again."

(2/2 is in a reply to this comment.)

[–]problem_redditor 76 points77 points  (2 children) | Copy Link


So men and boys were overwhelmingly the ones targeted by Boko Haram. And what does the mainstream media go crazy over? The kidnapping of 300 Chibok schoolgirls. There was a whole #BringBackOurGirls hashtag for women when Boko Haram captured girls. Even Michelle Obama spoke out about it and trotted out the line that they were "out to deny girls an education" when no, they were out to deny EVERY child a western education. It's even in the name. Boko Haram roughly translates to "Western education is sinful".

The United States sent technical experts to aid the Nigerian government's search for the girls. On May 27, 2014 the US already had sent 80 troops to Chad to support the unmanned drones and surveillance aircraft being used in the search for the girls. In addition they sent about 30 specialists from the Departments of State and Defense and the FBI to advise the Nigerians.

Britain, France and China also offered support in trying to rescue the girls. "A team of UK experts who will advise and support the Nigerian authorities in its response to the abduction of over 200 school girls touched down in Abuja this morning," a statement from the British Foreign Office said. They included diplomats, aid workers and ministry of defence officials. "The team will be working closely with US counterparts and others to coordinate efforts" as well as looking at longer term solutions to the crisis, the statement said.

It's clear that the international community went all out in their efforts to recover the girls. The abduction of the girls also put Boko Haram in the spotlight, galvanising countries into helping Nigeria deal with the threat in the long term. As far as I can see there was no such equivalent concern about the 10,000 boys kidnapped by Boko Haram, even though they made up the vast majority of those affected. The majority of the compassion and aid went towards the girls.

Interviews with some of the kidnapped girls who have since been rescued suggest that the kidnappers messed up. They had targeted the school to steal mechanical equipment. There were all these girls there that they hadn't expected to find, and the kidnappers discussed amongst themselves what they should do with them, since the girls had not been the target, were not expected to be there and they'd been given no orders regarding them. They decided to take them to their camp and ask their leader what he wanted to do with them.

Recalling the night of their kidnapping in April 2014, Naomi Adamu described in the diaries how Boko Haram had not come to the school in Chibok to abduct the girls, but rather to steal machinery for house building.

“One boy said they should burn us all, and they (some of the other fighters) said: ‘No, let us take them with us to Sambisa (Boko Haram’s remote forest base) ... if we take them to Shekau (the group’s leader), he will know what to do’”, Adamu wrote.

So the girls were not even the actual target of the raid. And yet these girls being kidnapped was the event that galvanised the international community to start offering equipment, intelligence, resources and manpower to "bring back the girls" and deal with Boko Haram. Abducted boys? Psssh, what abducted boys? Never heard of them.

EDIT: Fixed some of the links

[–]MrEMysterio 37 points38 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

There's nothing I like more than someone who does their research.

[–]Zoiddburger 10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Law enforcement across the globe is astoundingly deplorable.

[–]Mode1961 30 points31 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Or when 1500 (ish) Aboriginal Women are murdered or missing (btw, most (88%) of these crimes are solved) in 30 years, there is a national inquiry even though there are approx 3x as many missing / murdered aboriginal men.

[–]Shanguerrilla 9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Par meet course

[–]ViccIsThicc 33 points34 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

To add

It especially sucks how feminists play both sides. Sometimes we are the 'victim' - we are are delicate flowers that get so horrible offended if magazines such as dare to feature better looking people than us but other times it's "WOMEN ARE BADASS AND I CAN DO ANYTHING A MAN CAN 10x BETTER". It's a double standard.

[Edit]: This is the 70th comment breaking the 69 :(

[–]Generic_Reddit_Bot 14 points15 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

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[–]ViccIsThicc 13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy Link


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[–]B0tRank 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

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[–]RoryTate 55 points56 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

The antiquated idea that women's lives are more valuable or important is indeed one of the most confining "benefits" of being female. This idea is arguably the primary reason that women were coddled (note: not oppressed) throughout much of human history. Society understood that many of the jobs and professions that existed were stressful, time-consuming, difficult, and even dangerous, and thus sought to "protect" women from them and make sure they had a much more leisurely life (through discouraging them from pursuing such careers, and other social sanctions like "you'll end up a lonely spinster if you try to go to college"). The same thing happens even today when you consider the way many women in top positions have to be treated with kid gloves, and can't be criticized or held accountable for their mistakes. People are highly respected for the adversity they have overcome, not the titles they are given without merit. And women in general will unfortunately be forever unable to gain that perception of expertise and authority until society can shed the idea of "women first" when it comes to prioritizing human lives.

If women are so much more important than men, then they will simply continue to be coddled and catered to, just like a spoiled child. However, if one day they can be seen as human beings – no different from men – rather than precious wombs that need protection, then they lose that automatic concern for their safety and comfort, but they can gain the much greater respect and command of fully realized adults.

They have to choose one though, because they can't have both.

[–]RockmanXX 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Here are basic facts about History for FemNazis:-

[–]Oncefa2[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is what dictated gender roles for millions of years, not the patriarchy.

~80% of children never made it to adulthood. That (and a lack of effective birth control) meant most families needed to have at least 10 children, a task which obviously fell on women. It was a much more important job back then, and men biologically could not do it.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

The second to last paragraph is perfectly written. Many different types of women out there but that’s the two I see on either side.

[–][deleted] 19 points20 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The idea that victim status can be attached to groups of people is what's harmful and antiquated.

[–]AmuseDeath 13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The issue is that both women and men are biased towards women's concerns. The solution isn't to have it 100% the other way, but rather more towards the middle. It's going to require people to actively monitor their thoughts and behaviors to stop their pro-women bias and instead treat them as you would treat a man. The issue is that women are more desirable in today's society over men, which causes men to fight over scraps instead of uniting in brotherhood.

[–]mhandanna 7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy Link


So in summary its about me helping out a feminist in economics do her research on inequality (she wasn't doing it on women btw, just inequality in genera and we were focusing on retirement. Basically despite compared to women, men in her country get TEN years less in retirement AND have to work FIVE years MORE to even get any retirement at all (men retire 65, women 60)... Her SOLE conclusion: The pension system and retirement overall ONLY oppresses women and is structurally sexist to women. Ironically, earlier in essay she talks about how time discriminates women as women work 1 hour more per week if you add up paid and unpaid labour (this is spurious but oft repeated claim, many studies show otherwise).... yet seemed to be completely oblivious to the fact that men would have TEN full years less retirement, and this unlike personal choice (how much I work, how much I do unpaid labour) was actually MANDATED by state (I.e. men HAVE to work 5 years longer and the system also sets men retirement age as longe EVEN though they live 5 years less, so if anyone is being discounted agains for time, its men, and in those case structurally and obviously..... compared to more roundabout/stretching explanations she gave for why women doing more unpaid labour is actually women being discriminated against and not their choice)


Now coming back to your reponse, I think you have done something similar to the feminist I helped in her paper. Yes what you said above is true. My opinion is violence affects men and women in different ways. Overall yes statically no doubt men face more violence, but Im not going to paint is men only victims of this. Im not painting anything in fact, and Im not using idealogical framworks like patrichy to explain things. Im using normal social sciences way of looking at this. The only person doing the one gender is biggest victim is you, but in reverse i.e your ironically saying women are the only victims or biggest victims of violence, and violence against women is a special category. (despite violence against women being a minority form of violence)....However, the primary victims of violence are men. No question. Murder, kidnap, beatings, hate crimes, homophobic attacks, torture, unlawful arrest, political prisoners, police killings, child prisoners.... it goes on and one....murder rate is around 10x more than the only way you can say women are bigger victims of violence, is if you use a microscope and exclude all other forms of violence and look at one area.... sexual assault.... then claim that sexual assault is the biggest and worst of all, and hence women are most affected by violent crime.

The second thing you have to make women most affected hashtag is to say you know what the only violence that matters is cross gender. See below:

Method 5: Only count cross-gender violence.

If you compare only rates of woman-on-man violence with man-on-woman violence, you end up with the impression that women are much more likely to face violence. But it’s hardly acceptable to ignore the large category of man-on-man violence, because it’s not like an act of violence is “cancelled out” if the perpetrator and the victim share the same gender. Men face violence at equal or higher rates than women. The fact that the perpetrator is usually another man hardly lessens the impact. Interestingly, I’ve seen a similar method of focusing on cross-race violence used by white nationalists. Although black people generally face higher levels of violence, they focus on the fact that black-on-white crime is more common than white-on-black crime. Here’s an example from American Renaissance, an online white nationalist blog/magazine.

Going back to a topic from the previous section (Method 4), one point that could be raised here is that if most violence experienced by men is committed by men, doesn’t that rule out it being “because of their gender” in the sense of bias? The answer is no. Most people understand how women or black people can internalize negative biases against their own group, so why couldn’t men internalize negative biases against their own group?

Method 6: Victim-blame. Make assumptions and use stereotypes to portray male victims as less sympathy-worthy, or not really victims at all.

An example would be dismissing men’s higher rate of being murdered by describing a typical male victim as someone who “just” makes bad decisions and associates with drug dealers. This would be like dismissing women’s higher rate of being murdered by a partner by describing a typical female victim as someone who “just” makes bad decisions and dates drug dealers.

This isn’t an assertion that it’s inherently wrong to evaluate a crime’s severity based not just on the effect but also on the victim’s actions or choices and how “innocent” they were. How comfortable you are with that is up to you, and it’s not a topic that will be addressed here. The point here is that we need to be consistent. If it’s not acceptable to do to female victims of domestic violence, sexual assault, or intimate partner murder, then it’s also not acceptable to do to male victims of physical assault, murder, and robbery. If the thought of doing it to women shocks you then you shouldn’t do it to men. And if you don’t have a problem doing it to men then you do that with the understanding that you’re opening it up to be done to women too.

The reason inconsistency is a concern is because of traditionalist stereotypes of agency and the idea that “men do things and women have things done to them”. The implication of male hyperagency and female hypoagency here is that violence against men is more easily seen as something the man brings on himself while violence against women is seen as more “pure” victimhood.

Excellent video:


In summary IMO it is an incredibly gynocentric way and narcissistic way that feminism views the world.... only in terms of women.... I think that is the point she sums up really well in the video (), in fact thats the whole point of the video women are oppressed and men are privelged because it is incredibly gynocentric and narcissistic way of viewing things.

And society is gynocetnrtic which allows this.... and this is the feminist lie


Thanks for response, I'l reply later. To go with my reply:You said: 'Women do have it worse on average'citation needed. In what way? I am of the opinion men and women have issues and privileges. You are consistently, nahhh women only opressed (I dont even think men and women are oppressed either)What key metrics? List the specific metrics areas of life? And why are those female metrics worse for women than the metrics that affect men?Life expectancy? Retirement age: Years in retirement? Educational attainment? Freedom from disease? Homelessness? Being victim of violent crime? Suicide? Much longer working lives,Hard, gruelling jobs, death at work? work outside, work at heights? longer commutes, relocation for work?Be specific? Pretty sure ALL points above are worse for men as a class? No?So what points?For me its been:Female reproductive biology and genitals - but that is biology not society. It is huge huge thing though.Fear of crime (despite being far less likely to be a victim of crime - but certainly women are more afraid of crime)I could say more, but I am talking about key metrics.... health, education, etc. even saying fear of crime was pushing it a bit IMO

[–]bigred9310 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You’re right. And as you eluded to Stereotypes is a real problem. “Men/Boys Can’t be Raped/Sexually Assaulted, can’t be victims of Domestic Violence”. And that attitude Shows. Especially where College Men are concerned. The Dear Colleague letter scared the piss out of Colleges and Universities. Up until recently The Expelled Students on accusation alone. They stripped them of any way to defend themselves. Furthermore, Feminists don’t care or blind to the catastrophic damage to the accused reputation, loss of job, disowned by family and friends. Now Men are just as bad in this particular area. Female having sex with an underage Male.

Men: It’s a right of passage. Oh he wanted it. Or Where was she when I was in high school. Also A women gets a slap on the wrist. But if you happen to have a penis you’ll be lucky if the inmates don’t murder you. And Male Victims of Rape/Statutory Rape have a Duty to pay Child Support with no way out. Statutory Rape. Anyone under 16 can not legally consent. Then the courts turn around and order the victim to pay child support. The Needs of the Child is paramount including to the States desire to protect boys from sexual exploitation.

[–]IoSonCalaf 30 points31 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

With women, everything is a competition and only the winner gets validation. So in their mind, if you haven’t suffered as much or faced as much adversity as them, then they win and they get to be the only ones who get to complain or get compensated in some way.

But pain, grief, suffering, and having problems aren’t competitions. Just because one person thinks they have it worse, doesn’t mean the other person can’t feel pain or be suffering, etc.

By that logic, only one person on earth out of the entire human population gets to complain, feel pain, suffer, etc. But it makes perfect sense in a woman’s mind for some reason (women logic I suppose? I never understood it myself) and they wield it like a weapon even though it’s a logical fallacy.

[–]jaysanilaninani 23 points24 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

here is an easy way to get the point across

if someone is complaining about the patriarchy, ask them who has it worse: black men or white women

when they say it isn't a competition, then use that logic against them

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Well this makes a bunch of sense now from past experiences. Oof

[–]Mythandros 3 points4 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

Women are not bigger victims. They are generally more entitled and like to see themselves as victims but anyone with an ounce of common sense sees through that with relative ease.

[–]FeckinOath 1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

I just walked past a domestic abuse poster not so subtly implying that men as a whole are abusers.

The hotline and website aren't directed at victims, just perpetrators.

[–]dungeonmonkey69 4 points5 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Every time man. I ask femmies where I have to turn to as a male to talk about domestic violence two of my ex's committed, never have an answer. They just don't know. It's up to me to 'educate myself' on that one haha

[–]FeckinOath 2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

True, true. It's rare to find a men's shelter or space men can turn too that hasn't been booed out of existence, if it existed at all.

This includes fathers. Women and children shelters exist and are necessary but if you have to protect your child from their mum, that might be difficult. Probably just arrest the dad and call it a day.

[–]dungeonmonkey69 2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Yeah man pretty much. However my ex had all her kids taken off her by various father's so there is some justice for children in the world.

From what I remember there's between like 2 and 8 dv shelters for men across the entirety of the US. Literally none in my home country and the in local DV line literally says men can only ring it for anger management rather than victim support.

[–]FeckinOath 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

That's good, I hope those children are doing ok.'s-Domestic-Violence-Helpline.aspx

This is the page for my part of the world. Most of the resources are aimed at abusers. Then there's one down the bottom about being on the receiving end.

[–]dungeonmonkey69 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Cheers mate. You're in the same part of the world as me. Erghhhhhhhhhh yeah australia is the fucking worst for that. I ripped my teachers head off over this when I was training to be a counselor and eventually dropped it all together as I literally had to refuse to do units on subject matter out of objections against demonization of men. My teacher was understanding but the department head was a piece of shit that didn't like me calling it out.

[–]FeckinOath 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I used to work in childcare and experienced similar road blocks.

[–]TheBananaKing 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Imagine being told that your rape doesn't matter because not many people like you get raped.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I think feminism is toxic.

[–]EvilLothar 10 points11 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

What if, now hear me out.... what if we actually don't want to talk about harmful gender norms because we're not feminists and don't buy into that bullshit they spew?

The minute you start to buy into their feminist talking points, you lose.

Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

-Mark Twain

[–]Oncefa2[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If you take feminism to its logical conclusion you basically end up with the men's rights movement.

It's only MERFs (male exclusionary radical feminists) who go on and on about the patriarchy and sexism only affecting women.

Most feminists are probably MERFs but not all feminists are like that. Many do believe that gender equality should go both ways. And for some their biggest crime is really just ignorance. Sure they're a minority and I don't deny that the feminist movement is basically just full of misandrists nowadays. But I don't think anyone has a monopoly on the idea that there are harmful gender norms in society. The problem with most feminists is they're just as guilty of enforcing their own brand of harmful gender norms (like this one) as anyone else.

[–]yoitsericc 6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Men are only victims because of PATRIARCHY.

[–]dungeonmonkey69 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Which is victim blaming going by imperialist fem logic lol

[–]bigred9310 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

SAY WHAT????? That’s no excuse.

[–]-Cyber_Renaissance 5 points6 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

It's why we have a "women first" attitude pretty much everywhere, including in discussions about equality and gender norms.

Look how beloved Karen Strahgan is here. Meanwhile, Paul Elam is neither appreciated nor liked in here. She's inactive otherwise, I would've asked her if she knows how much attention she gets because of her gender and how ironic it is.

She gained traction when we first saw her in r/videos, Do you really think a man would have gained as much popularity as her? Me neither!

[–]FinallyReborn 5 points6 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

Same with Roma Army, she is a misandristic MRA that leeches off of SIMPS who believe she actually believes in the shit she is saying, she is a feminist self-disguising as an MRA to get the 10s of thousands of dollars she gets on Patreon.

At least Karen is intelligent and insightful, but it could also be because she is active on Reddit under the name u/GirlWritesWhat, and active on this Subreddit, don't think she would be as loved as she is on here had she not been a user.

[–]-Cyber_Renaissance 3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Paul Elam was also active on Reddit until he was shadowbanned along with warren Farrell.

Anyway, I didn't knew about Roma, gonna check her out.

[–]Oncefa2[S] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

They banned Warren Farrell? Wtf he's like not even a controversial figure or anything.

[–]-Cyber_Renaissance 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I was wrong, it wasn't Warren Farrell rather it was Dean Esmay

I learned that from this post.

[–]RockmanXX 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Paul is a grumpy old man with dry rhetoric. I recommend Stardusk, if you want to listen to a man speaking truth about Men's Issues. He's not an MRA but his presentation is much more pleasant than Paul.

Karen is highly successful because she can get away with it, she can't be called an ugly incel and 99% of white knights can't do shit to a woman, they only know how to harass&antagonize Men. She's exploiting a loophole.

[–]westoast 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah, and even making this argument really pisses people off for some reason. Really frustrating.

[–]ZMaiden[🍰] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

This guy at work today, late 50s, cornered a 16 year old kid in a cooler, yelling at him saying “you wanna go?!l” cause the kid was a little snippy to him. Thank god for an older woman who just would not have that, yelling at him that this is a kid back off. If the kid had been a teenage girl? Hell would have broken loose, managers would have been all over this guy. But because he’s a male teen, just some soft coaching. I’m hella pissed. I want this kid to call HR, this guy literally said “he’s not talking like a child he’s talking to me like a Man!” When we said he’s just a child back off. Straight up if he’d done the same thing to me, an older female, I could get his ass fired for harassment. He cornered the kid in a walk-in fridge, he had no where to go while this adult screamed at him. And I know unless I make a fuss nothing is going to happen because it was a teen boy.

[–]TheGameMaster115 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

We are all equally victims to society.

[–]Redtyger 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

To the rich*

[–]GoelandAnonyme 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

What do you mean by a bigger victim?

[–]babybabybabybabyblue -2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

i came here to tell yall i got a blue snd a parakeet katarina pair of 2, birds. wish me luck feeding them from my hand!

[–]GyratingPollygong -1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I agree, but I don't think we're going to be able to change the mindset. The fact that women are physically smaller on average, combined with the increased tendency for neuroticism and reduced aggression, means that women are always going to be less successful than men as a whole. They're also going to be seen as more vulnerable to victimization, or as experiencing more victimization, the former being a result of lack of size and aggression, and the latter being a result of neuroticism and increased likelihood to complain of victimization whether or not it is actually happening at a higher rate than to their male peers.

Even if women are experiencing negative events at the same rate as men, these factors come together to give us the perception that women have it worse. Then our societal perception reinforces the belief that women have it worse, which perpetuates the negative feedback loop, leading to the hysteria we have now.

One of my classmates is afraid to walk two blocks in broad daylight without being on a phone call in case she gets abducted. When I explained that she should try not to let social media scare her into thinking this is normal, a bunch of other women butted in quoting statistics that, while accurate as far as I could tell, prove how rare the type of assault or abduction she is afraid of is.

It's like with covid deaths. 200,000+ deaths sounds terrifying. I get why everyone wants to castrate a figurehead like Trump for a number like that. But when you measure those deaths against recorded infections, and against the population of the country, it puts them into a much more reasonable perspective. It's still not nice, but it's nowhere near as scary as when you're comparing that number to, say, the population of your city or state.

The use of statistics and data to perpetuate the belief of female victimization is the same problem.

[–]dungeonmonkey69 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Perpetuate and manipulate*

[–]Zoiddburger -2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Actually, we are addressing OP's post about victims, not what type of victim...or have you forgotten? (Wow, how embarrassing). OR do you already know the outcome so you don't even want to try to copy/paste articles because you know there are not any studies stating that women are the majority of violent offenders?

[–]Greg_W_Allan 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

How about you stick to the point then. As you say the post is about victims. NOT perpetrators.

[–]Zoiddburger -3 points-2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I actually amended to memorize those. Shocker! If it disgusts you, Rafi usually stays in your mind brain. #theleague

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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