No one used to mention this. All guys and girls didn't have much money, we all had lousy jobs, sometimes one would pay, sometimes the other, or we'd just struggle to find enough between us, it was typical to leave a cigarette as tip when we just had enough for the check, or a joint. For us, 15-20 years ago, the idea that the guy would "take care of the check" seemed OLD. Detached. Not because "it would seem inappropriate" but it would genuinely make us feel like we're at dinner with grandpa. If a guy did that, the girl would probably start laughing - not as some criticism, she wasn't trying to make a point by it, it would just seem detached. It would look ridiculous, like "what are you some porn director from Miami with a boat?" "Are you going to put on a silk robe when we get to your place"? The only ones who paid for a woman would "buy a drink" for a girl in a bar and these were lonely 50-60 yo and the girls just competed on how much they can drain from them, it wasn't any kind of "gesture" between two actual people on an actual date. On first dates it was either splitting exactly in half (good date) or each paying exactly for his or her own part (very bad date). Sure, occasionally I would pay the check, but not because "I'm expected" - the girl would say "oh sorry I got nothing..." and sometimes I SAID OH SORRY I GOT NOTHING, and this was never an issue or any kind of subject that we were even aware of. And this was more or less everyone. The entire discussion today is a digression. All different agendas and arguments seem like a fall backwards. It can be just a non-issue, as it used to be. I just wanted to let you know how it used to be.