This is really sad. Huge blackpill

Crosspost "Advice for girl previously taken advantage of" from /r/FemaleDatingStrategy:

19 girl, want advice on how to approach dating after being taken advantage of and humiliated in high school.

Hi! I’m a young girl (just turned 19 yesterday) and I wanted to seek for some advice on here.

So when I was 16 I moved to a new city and went to a new school where I didn’t know anyone. After the first semester, I started to get really depressed and suicidal because of a combination of things (I was lonely, I was quite so I didn’t talk much hence why I didn’t make any good connections/friends plus I just get really depressed during winter time). Then, I met this guy who was a year older than me and I felt like the world was opening up to me. I never even went on a date before him so I was kinda like a blank slate. Long story short, he took major advantage of me, and finger raped me. Things went really fast with him because he pushed himself on me and I didn’t know how to say no, I just kind of froze (I have sexual trauma from my childhood, I just freeze) .

This went on for about a month and half before I found out that he actually had a gf. I confronted him and her about it but he was able to convince her that I was crazy and in love with him and I was just trying to break them up. So they never broke up.

This really hurt my self esteem and my self worth. It made me feel so worthless. I had self esteem issues before him but after him it just went into the negatives (it’s a lot better now) I tried to commit suicide several times. Plus, because of my culture (Muslim) everything’s the girls fault. Didn’t matter that I was taken advantage of, when I told my mom about it she said (they ruined my girl, as in he took my virginity so I’m damaged goods now). People just though I was easy because I did stuff with him that fast, and I thought that too. I was so ashamed of myself. I just hated myself.

Now I was never a pick me, I never went around looking for a guy. I was literally at a library corner minding my business when he spotted me. But it’s been two years since this happened but it still lays heavily on my heart.

I just want to smart enough to never be taken advantage of like that ever again. I’m literally scared of guys now, I don’t talk to guys in general because I always think they know about my past and thinks I’m easy so they’ll just try to get some too.

You girls have any advice for me?