Hello people. Long time lurker here (enough to have seen incels subs being banned and the fds crowd going from talking on actually improving to posting memes and bathing in their own hate). At first I wanted to interact a while ago, but I've been pretty fine just lurking. So what a better time to introduce myself than purge week ?

With that out of the way, well fucking duh, reading the title. I think it's fine to want your cake but also be able to eat it, regardless of your gender. That's natural. However, a want is a want. It's like the being entitled debate, as in you're entitled to want either a 6786 feat tall man with perfect jawline who also happen to make a 7 figure, or a virgin that also have the innate ability to give you pornstar sex, while also being attracted only to you. However, you're not entitled to actually get it, and a lot of people seem to not get it (although you can make the case for willful ignorance).

People that are actually a catch get taken quite rapidly in that regard. And there's also that while the above is technically possible to find, it's just in regard of statistic so unlikely that what's going to happen is spending most of the life alone if you keep on holding out. Now, it's fine if you take being alone well (and in my opinion, a lot but not all people either convince themselves or adapt into it).

There's also the fact that regarding the model of big 5 (which I prefer to the mbti model that is more popular because it focus on different things to say something nice about everyone), if you're high in one trait, another is gonna take the hit. That's why you're not gonna find many introverts that you can have a nice and relaxing evening with going to do crazy extroverted shit.

Basically, when you confront your desires to reality, there is only two outcomes possible :-Reality adapt itself to your desires.-You adapt your desires to reality.No need to tell you which happen most of the time. However, it's fine to want something, and because I separate that entirely from the debate of how it collides with reality, I'm calling people that shame you for doing that hypocritical asshats. And it doesn't matter if you're a man, a women or in the technical rainbow in between. When people don't have drive or desires, they whither. Also, you're being coherent with yourself, and that's way more important to me than having perceived "good" values. But that's a discussion worth another thread on it's own, I feel.

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In any case ? Pleased to meet you all.