CMV: Obtaining a bride from a poor family is a good thing

hyperrreal · 2015-10-23T21:06:17+00:00

I marry her, pay her family, and then bring her back to America with me. It seems to me that all parties concerned will be better off due to this transaction.

All parties involved will not be better off. Yes you are giving that family money, so they benefit in the short term.

But long term, you're perpetuating the area's dependence on 1st world economies. There is significant evidence that "assistance" like this cripples those countries/regions, and prevents them from developing robust economies of their own.

antariusz · 2015-10-23T23:35:12+00:00

Can't negotiate desire. A woman will use a beta man as a provider, she may even have sex with him, but she will not be aroused by him. If you are sufficiently able to attract women around you, you do not need to go elsewhere to bring women to you. Bringing a woman into a different "market" will just increase her own value, without increasing your own value. Eventually she'll move on when she is able to obtain better.

wtknight · 2015-10-23T22:14:36+00:00

and I'll make sure she doesn't know English and keep her inside the home so she will be dependent on me and doesn't get affected by toxic Western culture.

And I imagine that you won't let her watch television, either, so she never realizes how much better life is for the average woman in the U.S. compared to her own life with you. It sounds like you want a prisoner more than you want a wife, and this is not a good thing at all.

Actually, even women from the most poverty stricken countries have probably watched American television shows imported into their country on the village television set and have a high expectation of how good life in the U.S is, probably an even higher expectation than how it actually is. She's going to expect this kind of life when she gets here, so you're not going to get away with keeping her from wanting to experience the finer aspects of American life.

djchazradio · 2015-10-23T21:38:36+00:00

If you take some young woman away from her family, move her to a foreign country, and you treat her like "USDA prime-aged virgin" she will be extraordinarily unhappy. Being close to family and poor is better than being a wealthy side of beef.

Also, she will divorce you the minute she gets legal residency in the US. :(

SirNemesis · 2015-10-23T22:02:33+00:00

Your second edit makes it sound like a very coercive relationship, as if you expect your wife to be nothing more than a baby oven.

What if she decides to go to college and get educated and learn English far after she has kids?

There's a whole lot wrong here. People change, especially when you basically remove them from a culture and bring them into one that is alien to their own. Expecting your wife to somehow not become like the people you seem completely averse to is a recipe for disaster...

goatismycopilot · 2015-10-23T22:19:49+00:00

So based on your edits your plan is to make her your prisoner and I guess you will be going to the grocery store, going to all of the school parent meetings, and taking care of all service related public interactions since you don't want her to learn English. Hope you never end up in the hospital because she won't know what to say to your caregivers.

goatismycopilot · 2015-10-23T21:24:47+00:00

If she is a clever young lady and clever enough to conceal it this is a great deal for her. She can come to America, get her citizenship, and then skip out on the marriage after and start a business or get a job and send money back to her family or sponsor one of them for citizenship.

My cousin is very traditional and conservative he wanted a traditional, conservative, younger wife from a foreign country, so he got one. They got married and had a child, she stays at home. He calls me once a month complaining because his job is stressful and his wife doesn't work. To be honest, I only vaguely listen I don't understand why he is not happy when he got what he wanted.

bonerdude420 · 2015-10-24T05:53:06+00:00

You underestimate the strain that cultural difference puts on a relationship. Also, contrary to red pill beliefs, less educated and cultured women are MORE difficult to cooperate with.

But what you're actually asking is if it is better to have a structured power difference so that the girl is completely dependent on you. It's not.

GridReXX · 2015-10-23T21:01:44+00:00

Knowing you, you never care if she's into you or not, so this is a good deal. Go for it!

lbspredh · 2015-10-23T23:38:32+00:00

I'll make sure she doesn't know English and keep her inside the home

my view is that not only is there nothing wrong with this action

really? you don't see why we might take issue?

belletaco · 2015-10-23T21:47:41+00:00

Sure if you don't mind having a wife that doesn't love you and will probably abandon you as soon as she gets citizenship.

prodigy2throw · 2015-10-23T20:57:08+00:00

Lmao Eddie Murphy did a bit about this like 20 years ago.

Sounds like a solid strategy.

bromance946 · 2015-10-23T20:58:18+00:00

In some poor countries there is a shortage of women, so by taking women out of the country, you're exacerbating the shortage. Now some poor man who has a worse life than you, has an even worse life than before, as not only does he have to live in a poor, shitty country, but you also took his woman.

This is basically where I see the future going if unbridled polygyny is legalized. Male disposability will increase as women flock to the high status betas.

smokecheck1976 · 2015-10-23T21:30:28+00:00

So you're going to what exactly? Get to the foreign, relatively poor, country hop off the aircraft and head down to the local bridal auction? Dude, you're drooling. Most parents in cultures that will allow a westerner to marry one of their daughters wont' sell them, but they will ask a grooms dowry of the person marrying their daughter and it's usually pretty reasonable.

This is the twenty-first century and most of the technology we have can be found in these other countries. The more traditional girls might not even talk to you without their family's permission and I can assure you that such a privilege isn't just given out. The more modern minded girls, especially the ones that have an idea that they would meet and marry a foreigner, are well versed on the use of the internet and usually are very savvy.

You can just go and wander around a foreign country hoping to meet a bride and I won't tell you specifically that it's a terrible idea, but you need to start planning six months to a year out whether you decide to just visit or you make an effort to meet one or two girls that may interest you before you go.

Study their culture and their mannerisms. Where possible observe specific formal mannerisms on youtube and practice them. Have knowledge of formal or customary phrases and responses.
Study their religion if it is different from your own or you don't have one. Even the offiially atheist countries typically have something akin to religious beliefs. Be prepared to attend temple if you spend time there. No matter how you are going about it, this is a “hearts and minds” effort and respecting their culture and tradition will earn you some major points.
Study their language. At least know enough to tell a cab driver where to go, order food, ask where some basic places (like restrooms) are. Enough so that the average local will at least give you points for making an effort. If you meet a girl online, she will know you had to work at it, and appreciate it.
GAME – Whatever you want to call it. The ability to be easily confident and sociable is absolutely of critical importance. If you don't have it here, the best you will do in a poor country is strike out, the worst is you will get eaten alive by some woman that can throw out tests you haven't ever even thought about over here.
Realize that everyone is going to try to upcharge you because you are a westerner, and it will be worse if you don't speak the language and don't know how to bargain with them.
Especially if you go alone, study what behaviors a woman trying to meet you will display as they vary quite a bit from culture to culture.

My wife, my second marriage, is Cambodian. Her uncle, who actually raised her, and I became fast friends in one of the world's shit holes years ago. When I told him I felt like I was ready for a serious relationship again, he suggested that I meet his niece and we found we were compatible. Everything I am telling you either came from personal experience or watching other western men flail about in Southeast Asian countries, or simply talking with my wife's family and her friends.

As for my wife, madly love that little woman man, she's awesome. Be prepared for unique relationship challenges, though.

joseremarque · 2015-10-24T00:10:03+00:00

You are forgetting about class, in the traditional sense. People born in to poverty have different values, beliefs, perceptions, etc that make it difficult for them to function successfully in elite society.

This would be okay if you're low class yourself and have no higher aspiration (but then where are you getting the money for this scheme?) or she is intelligent and well educated enough to adjust (but then why does she need your lame ass?).

wehadtosaydickety · 2015-10-24T07:52:09+00:00

I dated a woman from a third world country and a poor family.

You're making it sound like a one time payment. She and her family expect her to support them, regardless of whether she makes $100 a month or $5,000 she has an obligation to support her parents who can no longer work.

When she becomes the only person in the family to move to a first world country, she will be the breadwinner for her immediate family if not extended family.

A lot of us Americans only prioritize the financial well being of our spouse and offspring. In many of these cultures, her parents and siblings will have priority over you. She will expect to be sending a percentage of her (read: your) income home to them.

I tried to talk about this with my ex but she a,ways left it intentionally vague and would not cap a number monthly, so I had no idea what my wife tax would be.

SirNemesis · 2015-10-24T10:30:30+00:00

To respond to the "she'll divorce you once she has the green card" argument, I'll make sure she is from a traditional culture with low divorce rates, and I'll make sure she doesn't know English and keep her inside the home so she will be dependent on me and doesn't get affected by toxic Western culture. I'll also have lots of kids with her.

You people get more and more disturbing and more and more delusional.

'She can't do shit if I hold her prisoner and repeatedly rape her'

vinegarbubblegum · 2015-10-24T12:14:02+00:00

"child bride sex tourism is a good thing, prove me wrong."

and this is debate?

this is 4chanesque. anyway, no, it is not a sound plan.

in fact, all i can think after reading that, is what do you tell the people you know in real life when you put that plan into action?

like, it's one thing to ask us strangers on the web, but when you do get this child bride back to the West, how the hell do you explain her to your friends and family in a way that doesn't ensure you become a creepy social pariah?

Change my view if you can.

I know I can't. People have fantasies and they want to indulge them, but I can redirect you:

Russian Mail-Order Brides.

I hate Russia.

17b29a · 2015-10-23T22:08:41+00:00

"Obtaining"? She's a person -__-

SirNemesis · 2015-10-24T07:42:06+00:00

I think this desire comes from insecurity. Instead of desiring a girl in a situation of very big need where you will never be able to see if she really wants you or just your providing ability, you should work to improve yourself and get girls who are happy with their life. This way you would know the girl isn't with you by need, but by real desire.

SirNemesis · 2015-10-24T12:57:33+00:00

Lots of ignorant responses in this thread because people don't know what they are talking about. I'll address it point by point:

Like some people have already mentioned, loneliness would be a big factor if you decide to relocate her to America [or wherever you're from]. The language barrier can be difficult to get past if she doesn't have frequent lessons and these women typically come from large, close family units. If you go to work in the day and she's relegated inside it would put a serious strain on your relationship.

I know this from personal experience.

You don't want to bring her family over. That would be a hassle beyond words. First there's the financial situation of paying for all their flights, not just to the country but when they inevitably want to go home and visit relatives. How would they work? How would they even get visas? Do they have skillsets? How would they get around?

Really, the best solution for this is to leave America and go live in a third world country. Westerners are scared by an idea like this, but if you have good money and a skillset you can live like a king the rest of your life. Seriously. Visiting family would be easier, the relationship would be better, you'd have your pick of the nicest places on what is usually the equivalent of a tropical island to live...It's probably what I plan on doing once I decide to settle down.

Don't worry about countries with shortages of females. That's stupid.

-Nothing you do will foster economic dependency. That's also stupid.

Even if you go to America, she won't divorce you once she gets a green card. That is amazingly dumb. She has no job, no education, no relevant work experience, can't speak the language, probably can't even drive a car. How the fuck is she going to live? She's un-American, not an idiot [I'm assuming].

-The best thing to do is make sure she learns some English and get her out of the house doing things in groups or even with other foreigners. I've known many people who have this arrangements, and I've never heard of these women cheating even a single time.

SirNemesis · 2015-10-23T21:21:29+00:00

[removed]

SirNemesis · 2015-10-24T00:18:32+00:00

I'll make sure she doesn't know English and keep her inside the home so she will be dependent on me and doesn't get affected by toxic Western culture.

Areyoufuckingkiddingme.gif

SirNemesis · 2015-10-23T21:07:16+00:00

Depends on your SES. There are still wealthy WASP families in the US wherein the elderly generations lift their eyebrows at their grandsons marrying attractive, educated women whose maiden names happen to end in a vowel. This is not a demographic that will be enthused about their son or grandson buying an uneducated third world teenager.

ProtoPill · 2015-10-23T23:21:17+00:00

A few questions:

If she is a lazy, poor housekeeper will you ship her home?

If she is infertile and incapable of bearing children will you send her home?

If she only wants sex once a week will you accept that, or rape her regularly, or send her home?

rulenumber303 · 2015-10-24T00:03:38+00:00

Well TRP is sure you can tell people's future behavior from their past behavior. So I guess if you want someone who when offered material gain is willing to quickly pack up and leave most of what she has known before including many close family members, cutting her future children off from half their heritage?

I mean I'm not against women doing this if they want, I just think you're nuts if assume as a man that this way you'll get anyone other than girls with an adventurous streak whose parents feel no desire to keep around for their old age. I mean great she's from a traditional culture... that she has already given the big raspberry to and walked out on.

blametheboogie · 2015-10-24T00:08:02+00:00

Instead of getting a woman from a destitute country why wouldn't you just find a country that is less crappy and has American companies there, get a job with one in that country and move there? You'd get the woman you want, a culture that is more to your liking and an adventure.

Win win win

[deleted] · 2015-10-24T03:54:47+00:00

Whether good or not, I do not believe this plan works in the long term, here's why:

It would be near impossible to keep her inside the home. In the modern day and age, being a housewife requires lots of driving and errands, such as buying groceries, buying supplies for the house, driving the kids places. You could work at home and do all of the outside errands yourself, but this defeats her duty to you as housewife.
She will eventually have to learn English. Nearly all media/retail products/websites/signs in America use English as the primary language. If you have kids, the kids will have to learn English as all schools require it in the US Public School system, and thus, she will need to learn English to communicate with the children.
It is unrealistic to live a functional life without the aid of technology. I am assuming you will at least have a smart phone, tablet, or computer in your home, which she can use to look up things about western culture, feminism, or anything else. In theory you could not buy her any computers/hardware, but since she will realistically have to have some money supply of her own, she could buy one herself.

SirNemesis · 2015-10-24T11:45:36+00:00

You want to buy a young virgin from a poor Country and you don't even realize how omega that shit is? You're the greatest loser I've ever came across if you need to buy a woman from a third world Country, and considering that the vast majority of the men I see with women from shit Countries are old, ugly and fat, I'm just gonna go ahead and say that your future slave is going to feel repulsed whenever you touch her.

Red pillers are creepy af.

[deleted] · 2015-10-24T13:13:20+00:00

Depends if you can handle someone being completely reliant on you. What you are proposing might be a good idea if you can. Just to let you know I am on the other side of your wish. I spent a long time searching for a man who can provide me with a similar lifestyle to the one you say you want to give your future wife. I am a western woman but I have always liked the idea of being a housewife and taking on more traditional female roles. I was mislead when I was young by my ex into thinking I would have a more traditional home and he turned out to be the total opposite. I ended up having a child with him which he took from me. I am now with a man who leans slightly more towards traditional thinking but he does get frustrated with me from time to time because I don't bring in any income and according to him I am 'mentally retarded' and 'an emotional child'. He wants me to go on Ebay and buy and re-sale things when I am at home based on my own decisions and I just don't have the ability to think like that. He has also asked me to do camgirling which I don't like the idea of and I am far too shy and not charismatic enough. Based on my own personal experience I have a hard time believing there are actually men out there who want all that responsibility and won't pick and choose what they like from the traditionalist mindset and abuse it. It's no longer an obligation for men to support and take care of women. If you want to do this, I just hope you are genuine and that you treat this woman with kindness.

give_me_shinies · 2015-10-24T16:22:00+00:00

To respond to the "she'll divorce you once she has the green card" argument, I'll make sure she is from a traditional culture with low divorce rates, and I'll make sure she doesn't know English and keep her inside the home so she will be dependent on me and doesn't get affected by toxic Western culture. I'll also have lots of kids with her.

I was with you until this. This is creepy (yes, I know that's the TRP equivalent of the "n word"). And impractical. She'll have to attend English language classes so she can get citizenship, and she'll interact with other people there. She's eventually going to hang with Americans and consume American pop culture which will be a "bad" influence.

In fact, this sounds just like this Eddie Murphy skit. If it was apparent that Umfufu couldn't realistically be shielded from outside influences in the 1980s, what makes you think such a thing would be feasible in 2015 and beyond, with all the social media, internet, etc that makes connecting with the outside world so much easier?

Note, I don't think there's anything wrong with getting a mail-order-bride in general. I think "incels" in particular should utilise this option. The I'll literally keep her ignorant, pregnant, barefoot and locked in the house is what's wrong.

gamefuck · 2015-10-26T14:34:19+00:00

Social Shaming. Society will shame you for outsourcing on your women, instead of spending you hard earnt cash on a white women. Just look at the trend of older men marrying young asian women and the ridiculous backlash this causes among middle aged white women (who are now, lonelier than ever)

betterdeadthanbeta · 2015-10-23T21:33:49+00:00

Dat USDA prime.

But, here's the thing mate. You gotta stay on top of that shit. Let's say you do what you said, pick up some fresh, hymen intact, asian or eastern european concubine. You bring her to the US. She meets a few of our local entitled western harlots. They start talking. Maybe she gets exposed to an anti male hate group (feminism, social justice, etc). Some female divorce rapists clues her in to the nature of the game. Suddenly you have a real problem on your hands.

There's no real way out of this, unless you want to straight up live overseas.

ArrantPariah · 2015-10-23T23:23:36+00:00

Sounds like a plan. As for the "not fostering economic dependency" part--that could be a challenge, depending on where you go. Most Asian people want to provide a high standard of living for their parents.

SirNemesis · 2015-10-23T23:30:20+00:00

Here's my one CYV that you'll probably agree is a valid concern: most 3rd world countries, particularly in the extreme poverty populations, have quite low average IQs. Which will pass on to your future children.

grendalor · 2015-10-24T13:10:54+00:00

Edit 2: To respond to the "she'll divorce you once she has the green card" argument, I'll make sure she is from a traditional culture with low divorce rates, and I'll make sure she doesn't know English and keep her inside the home so she will be dependent on me and doesn't get affected by toxic Western culture. I'll also have lots of kids with her.

Hehe.

Okay, in all seriousness, if you are going the foreign route, the best way to do it is to expat yourself, go and live in that culture and have your family there, rather than importing someone into this culture. If you're looking to basically divorce yourself from the relationship culture here, the best way to do it is to leave this culture, physically, and live in another culture.

SirNemesis · 2015-10-24T15:27:50+00:00

It's very beta to marry a bride from a poor family. Alpha = marry a rich woman and never work.

Yonderlander · 2015-10-24T19:56:30+00:00

It was fairly reasonable until edit 2, when you went full slave owner!

3dbattleship · 2015-10-24T23:44:31+00:00

If pretty and virgin are the only characteristics you want, then go for it. But I can't imagine wanting to spend the rest of my life with someone I didn't know, doesn't speak my language, and doesn't have any real redeeming qualities.

ee4m · 2015-10-24T13:02:36+00:00

Or you always adapt to your own culture and realize that you don't actually need to buy a bride or have a bride at all to have access to sex .

Title	CMV: Obtaining a bride from a poor family is a good thing
Author	SirNemesis
Upvotes	14
Comments	307
Date	October 23, 2015 8:46 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/3pyat1/cmv_obtaining_a_bride_from_a_poor_family_is_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/cmv-obtaining-a-bride-from-a-poor-family-is-a-good.278875 https://theredarchive.com/post/278875