How do you guys explain a man getting angry over being ignored?

SincereJustice · 2022-10-16T15:12:30+00:00

Aggressive, inconsiderate people are more likely to approach in the first place

CimZim · 2022-10-16T10:19:18+00:00

Emotions aren't always productive, many times they're instantaneous and can be illogical or immature. If a stranger thinks they're entitled to your time simply for being in the same vicinity, there's no need for another reason to be upset. They think they deserve X, you don't give them X, they get upset about not getting what they're "deserved".

SwimmingTheme3736 · 2022-10-16T15:27:48+00:00

I hate this it’s. A no win situation

If you ignore them you risk them getting aggressive

If you say hello back then when they hit on you you turn them down they get aggressive.

spinky_bum9451 · 2022-10-16T14:54:53+00:00

He’s not entitled to your attention. Especially if he acts like a toddler when he doesn’t get it lmao You made a good move ignoring him.

I do agree that it’s more respectful to say you’re not interested, but I understand the reason why you ignored him. I read some other comments here and I get it because it has happened to me too: you say you’re not interested and he keeps trying and it quickly gets both annoying and creepy and my hand is in my pocket ready to dial 911 if he doesn’t stop.

Mr. Feeling Entitled is no longer entitled and his ego has been busted.

AstronautLoveShack · 2022-10-16T13:50:34+00:00

Just wear headphones, even if you don’t have them playing. It doesn’t solve 100% of these issues but they’ll assume you can’t hear them.

14ers4days · 2022-10-16T15:52:16+00:00

A lot of times people who approach strangers like that aren't all there mentally to begin with.

Siukslinis_acc · 2022-10-16T12:09:35+00:00

I do get angry when I tell something to my parents and they don't give any indication that they heard what I said (not even a aha/uhu). Because I don't know if they heard it and decided not to say anything or didn't hear what I said. If I asume that they heard what I said, but in truth they didn't then they tend to tell me that I didn't say the thing that they didn't hear.

-25T · 2022-10-16T15:59:13+00:00

Facts don't care about feelings. The fact is, it's because straight men have a high propensity to start hating women and adopted anti-women social and political views when rejected. Straight women do not start hating men and adopting anti-men social and political views when rejected.

This is scientific fact. I'm just waiting for an incel to reply to request sources. They love ignoring sources and pretending when several studies show the same thing that the facts are made up. Y'know how it goes sometimes. Some men love to pretend they aren't causing their own problem. Women do it too but my god, they don't turn the way men do.

RahLyt · 2022-10-16T19:26:30+00:00

So there's this women who left her card in the card Machine. When I noticed I called her we crossed eyes and she ignored me. It was not like we were in a dark alley, this was day time with a lot of people. I called her one more time she still ignored me so I just threw the card on the bin. The thing with me is I never know if it's racism or sexism but it is what it is.

RRBeachFG2 · 2022-10-16T16:09:59+00:00

Some ppl are just super extroverted and really feel the need to go out of their way to talk to people. These are the same ppl that usually can't tell when someone is just being polite to entertain them. If I'm not in the mood, which im usuallly not, I just ignore ppl also; if they get mad at it than its fine cause we are both on the same page now. (I think it prob helps that im 6'2 and 200 lbs)

trail22 · 2022-10-16T18:09:29+00:00

Usually? I have never seen a guy out in the world get angry with a women when they got ignored. God knows I got ignored a fair amount and I never got angry. not saying it doesnt happen nor that it is your fault, I just dont know how common it is with the average women.

Men are valued as providers. To have families. To date. That is how they get validation. There is pressure on men who cant get a women. They are insulted and called incels. Toxic men who cant date are lumped together with men who hate women. Talking about struggles dating will by its nature talk negatively about their experiences about women. Even if they dont say all women, people, especially women see this as a judgment and criticisim on women. They are told they are lazy, weak and not worthy of respect. Few communities will give men any value if they fail at dating. The ones that exist can be toxic.

Is it right to me? no. But its going to be more common and until there is a form of positive masculinity that gives men pride while still failing at dating, this will unfortunatly xontinue.

Society as a whole needs to create a new version of masculinity in sthe same way that women were told they didnt have to just be mothers, men have to be told they dont have to just be husbands or get women.

In the same way a women who had not been married nor had kids was not a failure, the same has to be shown to men.

Unfortunately society as a whole seems to resist any form of positive masculinity that doesnt revolve around kids and family.

Im not sure if any of this matters to you, but until men can fail at having a family and dating and still be respected; this type of thing will happen.

This is unfortunatly the result of greater equality in our society. While no one is suggesting that we go back to women being in the hosuehold, it would be pure folly not to realize that there are not going to be some real negative consequences to men and socierty as a whole.

The freedom that was given to women, needs to be given to men or this will continue.

Until an incel is told that their ability to date has no reflection of their value as a person , instead of told to shower and get a life, this will continue.

kinhk · 2022-10-16T22:45:33+00:00

Same reason chicks get angry over being ignored? Lol nobody likes to be ignored.

700horses · 2022-10-17T00:23:58+00:00

It’s rude to ignore people in the civilized world, and some people react aggressively to be treated rudely.

Historical-System972 · 2022-10-17T11:45:06+00:00

You've been deemed an unworthy breeding partner - it's a feeling no woman will ever experience or understand, so don't even try. Just thank your lucky stars it's not a reality you have to deal with.

Hoopy223 · 2022-10-17T13:52:44+00:00

Lol women do the same stuff

Excuse me miss I’m looking for the county building -

I have a boyfriend!

Go away creep!

Fuck off!

Etc etc etc

People are dicks

the_lazy_orange · 2022-10-16T13:52:44+00:00

its because these men feel entitled to womens time and attention. They expect women to be “nice and polite”. Look at all the men addressing how you are rude first, so a man’s aggression is warranted. They don’t care about our safety, they are about their access to women.

BoogersAndSugar · 2022-10-16T16:28:35+00:00

It's typically unattractive guys who do this. I don't condone their butthurt attitude, but I know exactly where it comes from. They get ignored/rejected constantly because they're unattractive. We're not talking being brushed off a few times, but literally 50 times in a row, again and again and again and again, over and over and over. Eventually they get so tired of it that they start copping an attitude.

Crafty_Letter_1719 · 2022-10-16T13:51:38+00:00

How would you feel if you posted this and you didn’t get a single response? Probably a little upset. How would you feel if every time you posted anything at all you didn’t get a single response? You might start feeling a little bit of anger and resentment at the world beginning to bubble away… There is never an excuse for rudeness and aggression but there is always a reason at the heart of everything.

YasuotheChosenOne · 2022-10-16T12:12:25+00:00

Lol because it’s rude obviously.

Just flip it around. Imagine you approached anyone (man or women) greeted them and they just straight faced ignored you. You’d likely feel that twinge of disrespect. Perhaps wonder how hard is it to say hi back?

This is one of those self perpetuating things. Being ignored makes people upset, upset people lash out, people lashed out upon ignore people.

It’s the same with ghosting. That shits frustrating. I always get the urge to just rain texts on a girl when ghosted. I don’t mind rejections, but that limbo space of being ghosted is very annoying.

warramite · 2022-10-16T12:07:28+00:00

No one likes being ignored.. He just fails to recognize as an unattractive stranger, he has no value in your life.. don't beat yourself up over that

Warm_Gur8832 · 2022-10-16T13:59:51+00:00

I honestly have no idea because this isn’t something that I do, so all I could really offer is guesses.

2022-10-16T15:44:15+00:00

It's just emotional immaturity, they're not trying to get you sympathetic to your cause, they just have anger that they haven't learned to keep a lid on.

HazyMemory7 · 2022-10-16T19:08:26+00:00

Entitlement, desperation, poor parenting, immaturity

You should continue to ignore men that act like this. They do not have good intentions or just want to ask you how your day was or get to know you, they just want to have sex.

LouisdeRouvroy · 2022-10-16T22:41:19+00:00

Anger makes you react which changes your stance of ignoring him. Suddenly you're no longer ignoring him.

It's about making you understand that ignoring him isn't really your decision.

DonutSwitch · 2022-10-16T22:51:05+00:00

Some people take that as rude. It all depends on upbringing. When someone who was ignored when they were kids by parents they tend to feel insecure about it. Their aggression is a lack of understanding of their own emotions. You did nothing wrong with what you did. Ignoring is the only thing you can do sometimes.

FutureBannedAccount2 · 2022-10-16T15:57:47+00:00

Depending on the level of anger it makes sense

Imagine you see someone you want to talk to. You get up the nerve to say something and they completely ignore you. You’re going to feel some kind of way whether it’s angry, sad or embarrassed. You might get some catharsis by calling them an asshole as you walk away or something.

Its not a man thing it’s a human thing. People don’t like to be ignored it’s not that complicated

Few_Ratio5835 · 2022-10-16T20:30:55+00:00

so when someone gives you the silent treatment you don't care? I highly doubt that.

anonymousUser1SHIFT · 2022-10-16T22:10:55+00:00

Two things for the same reason why women get upset and annoyed when someone else ignores them. (Don't act like this is just a man thing).

Second, if a guy is trying to strike an a conversation (aka flirting) and you just ignore his existence, you have basically just called him a creeper and said that his existence is beneath you to even acknowledge. Which is very much a very personal feeling attack.

Lastly, ignoring someones existing is straight up just really rude...

eth_trader_12 · 2022-10-16T10:18:36+00:00

It is irrational to insult someone if they ignore you. Getting aggressive doesn’t change anything you’re right. And it happens because their ego is hurt.

However, it is also rude to completely ignore someone if a stranger says hi. You can simply say “hey, sorry, kinda busy rn” or something along the effects of that.

With that being said, you don’t “owe” someone that response. But we don’t owe people many things. We don’t “owe” a courteous response to anyone, but that doesn’t mean completely not acknowledging someone isn’t rude

bottleblank · 2022-10-16T10:14:59+00:00

Unless someone's trying to start a fight, I don't think I've ever seen this happen. If I did, I certainly wouldn't expect it to be attempting to have someone be "sympathetic to their cause".

Having said that, I have seen (and felt) that it's rude to not acknowledge/respond to someone who says something to you, like "hello"/"good morning"/"good afternoon" when passing by, or something like when you step aside to let someone pass on a narrow path you might want them to say "thanks". I don't think most people would get angry if you don't respond, but they might be a little put out that you didn't just respond out of politeness.

Hydrogen575 · 2022-10-16T13:12:30+00:00

Damn you just straight up ignore these people? For what, just giving you a compliment or saying hi?
Of course people are going to think that's pretty disrespectful. This is not something exclusive to men.

Last week at the gym I wore a shirt with college letters on it, and I got complimented a few times by both genders. Sure I was very busy with my workout, but I can't imagine not at least thanking them for their compliments, or even giving them a nod and a smile to acknowledge them. Straight up ignoring them would have been so rude--at the least.

That’s not going to make me more sympathetic to your cause.

And what cause is that exactly? The cause of wishing a stranger a good day? The cause of expressing a compliment?
Oh, unless you're already assuming every single lowly stranger wants nothing else but to get into your pants from just a passing greeting. If that's the case, the one with a sense of entitlement would probably be you.

TheRedPillRipper · 2022-10-16T10:14:03+00:00

why get aggressive

The simplest explanation is that person has issues. If it’s a recurring trend, the issue is yours.

Godspeed and good luck!

AoiLune · 2022-10-16T20:09:34+00:00

If someone is just trying to be friendly and you don't even treat them like a human, then you're the bad person here. You aren't required to converse with them, but if you think people are deserving of basic courtesy and kindness then it's your responsibility to just politely let them know you don't wish to talk, at the very least. You've essentially asked "Why do people get upset when I'm rude to them?" Doesn't matter if you assume they'll be rude to you. You still need to be a fair and kind person.

flakybottom · 2022-10-16T14:05:41+00:00

This isn't just a man thing. As an autistic guy, men and women have gotten angry at me for social crap.

Bikerbats · 2022-10-16T20:46:09+00:00

That's not entitlement. It's RUDE to ignore people, and people become angry when you're rude to them.

Banestar66 · 2022-10-16T14:08:26+00:00

People on this sub: Get off dating apps, talk to someone in person

People on this sub: Also upvote this post.

Seriously, how hard is it to say “I’m busy I can’t talk right now?”

abaxeron · 2022-10-16T17:15:28+00:00

"Men bad", the post.

How do you guys explain a man getting angry over being ignored?

How do you gaaaaahls explain women getting angry when they ask a man for assistance ("could you help me with this heavy stuff") or preferential treatment ("can we swap seats so I sit next to the window?") and get "No" in response? I don't understand how that reaction is productive. Where does this entitlement come from, and when a woman is told "No" and told that she's not getting what she asked for, what outcome is wished?

Finally. It's normal and customary in many, many, many parts of the world for dog-owners of the same area to say "Hi" and get to know each other, if for no other reason then to not walk their dogs at the same time in case the dogs don't like each other. Or the opposite, to walk them at the same time if the dogs are friendly and like to play together.

SNAILSLIVEONJUPITER · 2022-10-16T14:08:52+00:00

Lol what do you mean “how is this aggression productive?” Do you everyone thinks of you as some princess that they want approval from no matter how rude you are? No. They’re just expressing their anger. Their goal no longer is to be friendly with you.

Yes those people are being weird and you should stay away from them but where’s this “how is this aggression productive” talk coming from? You ignored them. That’s rude. There’s your explanation.

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Stop_Maximum · 2022-10-16T14:34:54+00:00

You can just walk away, they will react how do they want to react, eventually they’ll get over it. Not everyone will say hi back, they should know and act accordingly

hhhhhhikkmvjjhj · 2022-10-16T16:23:10+00:00

I’ve had women get angry when I have rejected them. I think it’s human to get angry when rejected and men do most of the approaching due to social norms, so they have more reason to be angry.

wtknight · 2022-10-16T16:27:19+00:00

It's frustration out of being rejected. Men stereotypically get angry and lash out (hopefully never in a dangerous way). Women stereotypically go home and cry and eat ice cream. It's probably the result of hormonal and socialization differences between the genders.

Neptune-Jr · 2022-10-16T17:50:45+00:00

When people get upset they usually aren't thinking rationally. They don't insult you in the hope you change your mind. they insult you because they are upset and lashing out.

Count_Giggles · 2022-10-16T18:04:05+00:00

Lack of stoicism and abundance mindset.

Of course, there is entitlement as well but it boils down to that.

i'd say drop the good ol "i have a boyfriend" in their face and if they come up with some clever line like "so do i - but pssst don't tell anyone" just say "i really have a boyfriend"

Apprehensive_Cut_146 · 2022-10-16T18:04:44+00:00

Immaturity and in need of theraphy.

eiggteen · 2022-10-16T18:14:26+00:00

‘Just ignore him’ ‘why did you entertain it’

But then these replies …

LetSuitable5665 · 2022-10-16T19:02:34+00:00

Probably doesn’t get any pussy, ppl who actually get women are used to rejection, especially if they cold approach like that.

Ok_Razzmatazz_1751 · 2022-10-16T19:25:23+00:00

These particular group of men are immature emotionally, you are smart to ignore and move on. They would never be able to handle any of life's crisis if they cant handle not being acknowledged by a complete stranger in public . Who raised these people , geeze.

Sirjon8 · 2022-10-16T19:48:18+00:00

Its dumb. I simply let her move on. I do wonder if perhaps some men have respectfully given you space, but its the abusive douches that you more easily recall and notice. Our brains are wired to notice the negative more,

kvakerok · 2022-10-16T21:53:07+00:00

He's an inconsiderate asshole 🤷🏽‍♂️

2022-10-16T23:31:06+00:00

They get off on the fear, not the idea they'll actually have anything to do with you

calfshrug · 2022-10-17T00:40:34+00:00

Do a macho man randy savage impersonation and start walking like a cowboy in spurs. Or say, “freeze, asshole!” but say it without any sort of real edge or hate in your intonation - go watch the Sam Hyde sketch, officer maggot, for reference.

Of course, if you start doing zany abrasive stuff like this, you’ll probably be best to start packing a firearm on your person, but would you rather be a powerful chick who is both funny and worthy of the rapport and approval of both right wing incels and feminists alike, or would you rather be stereotypically catty and avoidant?

I’d rather you be based and funny.

Like, in a Scottish accent you could begin to narrate, nature documentary style, the interaction occurring between you and the unwanted approacher. That would be based as hell, but again, either start packing guns, or learn to run 40 yards in 5 seconds and how to handle basic combat. Because being powerful and unafraid is based.

Or say that you’re on NoFap

@ black guy ITT who tried to hand the card to a catty lady… it would’ve been based as fook if you had chimed in with a deliciously European or Continental African accent. Then the lady would become a pariah among the people present, because not only would it be evident that she’s racist, but it would show to everyone else that you are immediately elevated to a higher social status (unfortunately for y’all), and she would become a target to everyone else

Digital-Bionics · 2022-10-17T00:46:33+00:00

Ah the classic mummy's little entitled shit.

luckyme1315 · 2022-10-17T04:00:21+00:00

Yes I feel the same way. If someone just says hello to me while they’re passing by (I always respond back), or stops me because they’re not in their neighborhood and need directions to something that’s just fine by me. Someone at the grocery asking for info to locate something is fine too. Even when it’s an elderly person sitting on the same bench as me, I’ll happily engage with them if I have time, as I know they don’t have a whole lot of social interactions in general.

What I resent is a stranger stopping me just to chat… they’re imposing on my time without validating that I’m ok with it. Man or woman doesn’t matter, they’re being self-entitled and I’m not ok with that. It’s harder if it’s a man because there’s always the fear factor that they’ll hurt you. Catcalling is horrible, there’s aggressive and degrading elements to it that will make any woman flee.

1 out of every 6 women in the US has been a victim of an attempted or completed rape. Every 68 seconds a woman in the US is sexually assaulted. Men who are not rapists or sexual assaulters need to keep this front of mind before ever approaching a woman they don’t know with the intent of ‘getting her number’ or whatever. That’s the grim reality of the 21st century.

Lots of idiotic comments in this post about ‘you all want to live in a society that’s completely isolated’ no dumbasses, we want to be able to live our lives freely without getting raped or assaulted. The male sex is the one doing the fucking majority of the assaulting, so men are going to have to compensate by not cold-approaching women unless they have a valid reason to, and controlling their emotions/remain polite and move on if the person doesn’t want to engage with them. There are lots of social venues and events where this type of thing is welcomed and encouraged, and cold approaching needs to stay within the confines of these venues and events.

I believe the astounding level of self-entitlement in these people who cannot control their emotions comes from how they were raised. In French we say ‘l’enfant-roi’ means the child who is king. Parents who never say no to their children, and give them everything they want for no reason, except for their time because they’re usually too busy with other things to spend time with their kids. Those kids usually turn out to be adults that are self-entitled monsters who lack social manners, because they weren’t taught enough by their parents.

SteveSan82 · 2022-10-17T04:50:03+00:00

Men raised by single mothers behave like that.

Women are childish when rejected. Guys always have to lie to get them to not have a meltdown or accuse you of being gay

Life_Level_6280 · 2022-10-17T09:37:53+00:00

If any person ignores me I’d be slightly annoyed tbh. I would not express this outwards as I’m an emotionally stable person and wouldnt want the other person to feel upset, but inwards I would.

Basic human courtesy makes me at least acknowledge a persons existence (unless that existence is threatening to me).

Same reason I say hello to beggers, at least they have a feeling they exist.

MetaCognitio · 2022-10-17T10:41:27+00:00

He could be a pushy jerk (most likely) or might feel disrespected at how you are avoiding him.

Could be a guy that is frustrated with approaching and getting hurt while making himself sort of vulnerable to you. If it happens a lot, it can build up. Guys can get frustrated with online dating, going to bars or anywhere else and getting blown off.

Either way, it’s not your job to “fix”. Don’t be rude if you don’t need to be but put your safety first.

MiddleZealousideal89 · 2022-10-17T21:29:52+00:00

Reading these comments, it seems that a lot of dudes in this thread seem to think that humanity will go extinct/nobody will ever date if you don't yell at random women on the street.

RealAmericanWeasel · 2022-10-17T21:41:07+00:00

I’d need to hear an example of what you mean when you say, “in the street.” I ignore panhandlers but don’t have any problem with them trying. They’re just doing what they think they need to do. If you’re talking about a similar scenario and have a similar line of thinking towards any man talking to you, then what is the problem?

Additional_Speech164 · 2022-10-22T15:51:54+00:00

Yup I don’t see how this will work either. It’s a huge run for the hills moment for me. It means you made the right call by ignoring.

EugeneCezanne · 2022-11-12T01:53:56+00:00

I don't know if I'm one of the "you guys" you're asking, but the way I understand it is that random street hollers, while sexual in performance, aren't actually about sex: they're about power. The man is exerting his power to get a reaction out of you--obviously he doesn't expect you to say "oh hey, yes go have sex now!". No reaction renders him powerless. Thus, the anger as a defense mechanism.

that's a widely accepted social psych explanation, at least.

Title	How do you guys explain a man getting angry over being ignored?
Author	Throwra_sisterhouse
Upvotes	60
Comments	421
Date	October 16, 2022 10:10 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/y5d6fc/how_do_you_guys_explain_a_man_getting_angry_over/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/how-do-you-guys-explain-a-man-getting-angry-over.1135419 https://theredarchive.com/post/1135419