How important is it for your spouse to be a virgin?

2021-11-09T19:53:24+00:00

Don’t care if she’s a virgin or not as long as she’s clean and disease-free.

I am KHHV.

Devourer_of_felines · 2021-11-09T19:51:34+00:00

0% importance.

Do you hold yourself to the same standard, e.g., you're not a virgin and would not hold it against your spouse for not being a virgin since you slept around?

This right here; I certainly ain't 'saving myself' for marriage nor do I expect a prospective spouse to.

yvaN_ehT_nioJ · 2021-11-09T23:03:56+00:00

It'd be nice, but this is the US so there's really no point in even stressing over it since the vast vast majority of people stop being virgins relatively quick.

I'm religious so yeah, it'd be great but it's just not realistic in this day and age to expect anyone else to still be a virgin. At this point the concern would be more over "n-count", and that's more just due to concerns over shared ideas & values than anything else.

To preempt any potential comments, am virgin as well, have dated, was really close to marrying someone else some years back, etc. I don't think it's right for people to be sleeping around and then complaining about not being able to settle down with a vIrGin/"low n-count" person.

alialahmad1997 · 2021-11-09T20:29:45+00:00

I am a virgin

Having a virgin seems nice but not that important what is more important is her sexual past

I don't care if she had sex with few boyfriends but I do care about hook ups

sine120 · 2021-11-09T20:12:52+00:00

My spouse and I have only been with each other, neither of us were interested in waiting until after marriage. For the age we started dating (15/16) it was good to grow together and have all our firsts with each other, but it wasn't a huge dealbreaker. If I were single and out of college, I would probably not want to commit to a virgin. I'm not into wait-until-marriage types and I don't want to fall into a sexless relationship. I'd much rather have a girl who couldn't keep her hands off me and has been with a couple other guys than have a virgin who couldn't care less.

sublimemongrel · 2021-11-09T19:51:55+00:00

Who on earth besides very religious people waits until marriage to fuck these days? I don’t think men or women by and large in 2021 want or expect that…

grahamcookiefart · 2021-11-09T23:26:38+00:00

Woman, was a virgin and expected a virgin. Though it was for religious reasons, and for myself avoiding STDs and unwanted pregnancy seemed like the logical addition to my religious intent.

GoWest7 · 2021-11-09T20:00:03+00:00

If this was a fair question (this is coming from a religious person) how many of these red pills are virgins themselves?

Why do they expect virgins, but spend the rest of the time talking about using prostitutes, getting laid by easy women, and then demanding marriage with a virgin?

Peak narcissism.

NICHIJOU2411 · 2021-11-10T00:47:09+00:00

I’d highly prefer it being one myself.

nick1812216 · 2021-11-09T20:27:44+00:00

Not at all important

nodegreenoknowledge · 2021-11-10T00:47:05+00:00

Not much, I just think it’s true if someone has slept with 200 people that that says something about them. But you can’t be mad at someone for having normal experiences.

NeutrinoParticle · 2021-11-10T04:44:56+00:00

The importance of virginity isn't the real issue for me, it's the NUMBER and TYPE of people they were with in the past.
Look up marriage statistics based on number of previous partners.
Here's a sample graph:
https://ifstudies.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/wolfinger-sex-partners-divorce-figure-1-1.png

chubbybutt22 · 2021-11-09T19:59:17+00:00

I waited till marriage and I’m now divorced with sexual compatibility having been a huge issue. Then I had a lot of sex. My current partner was a virgin when we started dating. But I really don’t care if they’re virgin or not at all.

old_wise_man_ · 2021-11-10T00:30:30+00:00

Very important. I’m very religious so it’s very important.

Novadina · 2021-11-09T20:02:41+00:00

Well, my husband wasn’t a virgin when we married because we had lots of sex with each other before marrying. I certainly would have never married him if he didn’t even want to have sex with me, as sex in a relationship is very important to me.

historyhill · 2021-11-09T20:16:09+00:00

I was a virgin on my wedding day, as was my husband, but we're pretty religious so it wasn't a surprise. I didn't feel like I had to marry a virgin but I had to marry someone who agreed with my beliefs. Someone who was not a virgin before conversion would not have been a deal breaker but someone who stayed sexually active likely would have been. (For what it's worth, we were also quite young when we married--23 and 22--but I still have friends who are now 30 and continue to hold to that standard for themselves)

Taipanshimshon · 2021-11-09T20:31:24+00:00

It's absolutely not.

M4sterDis4ster · 2021-11-09T21:16:27+00:00

Very important. I am 29 and I dont want a virgin. I dont want a promiscuous one either.

Prize-Thought-4205 · 2021-11-10T00:15:54+00:00

Holy f lol I don't know why I haven't thought about this question in such a long time

When I was a naive 19 year old who didn't know **** about American women and how sexual most of them actually are I wanted a virgin wife & wouldn't settle for anything else.

And now... i'm fine with any women with just less than 5 past sexual partners. I don't care if she's dated 100 guys but never did anything sexual beyond 5 of them, since that tells me she still has all the same values for intimacy & connection I do, isn't controlled by impulse or a need to blend in with the crowd & hivemind telling her to be a baddie or whatever.

Isn't into Onlyfans, Tinder, never did OLD at all actually, not into porn or anything related to sex work.

Intelligent, respectful of all people, humble, down to earth, kind to everyone & more introverted seeming.

She would need to be deep, compassionate, empathetic, philosophical, affectionate & adventurous.

Yeah that about covers my dream wife, I can't see myself into any other women for the really long term.

I can kind of lead an ideal women into a lot of the traits & values I want or explain why certain things in life matter so deeply to me... non negotiable philosophies about our relationship & connection, potential future marriage, and my views on raising children in the modern age.

But I can't change a women's past sadly about any of the other things i'd look for.

I'm still early 20s building up wealth & power to express my options but of course, i'm not gonna be a monster to girls when i'm closer to the ideal man I want to be myself. There just isn't any point in being bitter or jaded about female nature & all your past suffering if you want any relations with them, its counter productive... but i'm far too aware of human nature now.

Whatever is true or false, in my 2 years of lurking this sub one reality remains that matters more than any other. We are all humans, we all live & survive in the human condition and our society. Normal society doesn't ever think about any of this stuff let alone spend hours & hours consuming this content on Reddit, which means to even be aware of all of this is abnormal if the thoughts never came to you naturally through wisdom & personal experience.

My future spouse can have her own opinions of course... if she did not have her own unique voice I doubt i'd fall in love with her... and a playful attitude would be nice but above all she has to be feminine & never overbearing or insufferable.

I want a wife that is as calm & laid back as me no matter what happens good or bad & can focus on solving the problems or growing past things, communicating rather than by absorbed in arguments, fights, pettiness or toxicity.

A girl that affects my peace of mind at any time period in my life would decrease my quality of life and not be on board with the program.

If I found a beautiful virgin girl with all my traits? That's amazing, I would court her & propose ASAP... would probably even be really "simpy" & romantic with her at times to express my interest and happiness.

If I found a beautiful girl with a handful of past sexual partners, that's nice... i'll try to get to know her for a while and make sure she shares all my values & wants to keep them for the long term. If I get a hint of feminism or some other ideology or philosophy I view as degenerate, counter productive for quality relationships or life I would keep searching.

I'm open to searching in the UK, Australia, Canada and many other foreign countries if I can't find an American women with everything I want in the next couple years.

If I never find the ideal wife in all of my 20s... ah well, there's more fulfilling things in life still, maybe i'll even get to be a bachelor at 30+.

So there it is, you can agree or disagree with my viewpoints but nothing you or anyone else ever says or does can change them. Just like I can't change girls that love tattoos, obsessing about recreational drugs or vaping, hooking up with with any guy with a pulse that gives them attention.

There is nothing wrong with any of those things, or how anyone lives life, its their choice... we all have decisions to make, some of them will make us happier later in life & give us what we want, others... who knows.

Whisper · 2021-11-10T05:20:41+00:00

Virginity is nice, but it's less important than "was trying to establish a permanent LTR every time she had sexual intercourse".

wtknight · 2021-11-09T20:01:32+00:00

Not important at all. If she has had sex in loving relationships in the past that didn’t work out then I’m not going to fault her for that. The same thing happened to me. People get into relationships. They often don’t work out.

What I do fault women (and men, if I were attracted to them) for is enjoying casual sex. I would prefer that she weren’t into informal FWB sexual relationships either, but I never had to make an actual decision about that, as the women I’ve dated have only had past relationships (as far as I know).

WretchdFlesh_Redeemd · 2021-11-09T20:32:40+00:00

I’d prefer a virgin or at least a low body count since my body count is only 1

theatma43 · 2021-11-09T23:28:19+00:00

These subs make me wanna off myself lol

CimZim · 2021-11-09T21:00:28+00:00

I'm not a virgin and wouldn't expect my hypothetical spouse to be one either. However if he was that would be fine, so long as he's also okay with me having a partner prior to him.

Orange_Paisley · 2021-11-09T21:06:19+00:00

This has never been important to me. My first and I were virgins together in HS and after that, it ceased to matter. I would prefer someone who has a similar attitude to sex as me though - not someone who has a lot of hangups but not someone who is into really gross shit.

jayval90 · 2021-11-09T23:58:26+00:00

I personally don't count a difference if the previous sex was only in a committed relationship or if it was a bunch of one night stands. What I care about is how they view that time in their past. If they regret it, want to change, and I have reason to believe and trust them, then I could be willing to compromise.

The problem I have with the "committed relationship" exception is that you tend to have the most sex in those committed relationships, and the bonds are much deeper with that person. Between dealing with a person who has had the trauma of splitting an extremely deep bond with someone, and who has to deal with the remainders of that bond itself, I'd rather deal with a girl who had a few one night stands and finds them disgusting than a girl who had sex every week with the same guy for a year.

But honestly, I'm looking for a virgin. Yes my reasons started from religious grounds, but there are plenty of practical reasons to do that.

Also the reasons for not being a virgin at marriage are complete BS. "You might not be sexually compatible." Sex is literally something that you can do with an IQ of 25. It's not that big of a deal if it's not mind-blowing every time. Do you know what is mind-blowing? Deep meaningful connections that can only be created by years and years of effort and working together. The actual act of sex lasts how long again? 10 minutes per day if you're a pair of horny b****rds. All the rest of it you can pretty much figure out beforehand without doing that last bit that takes your virginity.

LeadInfusedRedPill · 2021-11-09T20:03:42+00:00

Not at all

LittyKitsune · 2021-11-09T20:23:06+00:00

It's a preference, but not a complete deal breaker. My other standards (compatible values and morals) tend to select for virgin men. But shit happens, people fall away from the faith, some come back more devout than ever but will never be able to erase what happened in the past. So I personally think it's important to allow some grace for cases like that. Besides, I don't think it's appropriate to ask details about someone else's sexual past early on in the relationship. The main thing I'll have to go on for a while is how he lives in the present.

januaryphilosopher · 2021-11-09T20:24:11+00:00

If they're a virgin before they meet me, it's not a problem but I'd be interested in taking it before marriage. I'm more concerned that they haven't had a lot of partners and only had sex in committed relationships for sexual compatibility reasons.

phantomdilletante · 2021-11-09T22:14:45+00:00

For me, having similar or at least complementary views on sex and sexual histories is more important than actual virginity or not. As in, I’d rather be with someone who, while having a history of hookups and casual sex, wants a similar kind of thing that I want, which is a romance based monogamous LTR with sexual elements we talk about and agree on, than be with a literal virgin who might like having sex with me once we’re together but doesn’t really love/care for me.

That being said, part of why I don’t judge people about their virginity, or lack thereof, is it wouldn’t be fair of me, because I kept mine intentionally for so long for religious purposes and then lost it, so I give out the same compassion and understanding I hope somebody else would show me, as I don’t want to uphold a double standard that hurts people in the world. That’s why it always weirds me out to see old dudes who’ve fucked around a lot wanting to marry young virgins. Like, dude, if that’s what you wanted, you should have gone for that a few decades ago. Now you’re one of those gross old people that makes the world worse for everyone, and you deserve as much rebuke as possible.

VulcanSummers602 · 2021-11-10T00:02:55+00:00

It's not really. If she is, it's dope! If she isn't, that's fine as well. As long as she doesn't have kids.

Mobrowncheeks · 2021-11-10T00:25:21+00:00

I would be kinda ashamed if some woman saved herself just to give it to me 😭😭

MrShakedown1 · 2021-11-10T00:39:10+00:00

Do you hold yourself to the same standard, e.g., you're not a virgin and would not hold it against your spouse for not being a virgin since you slept around?

Since when I have a choice lol ?? I'm unfuckable.

heywoodsr · 2021-11-10T01:59:52+00:00

It was a “dealbreaker “ if she wasn’t a virgin. No offense to any women here but I wanted to spend mi life with someone who was never touched by anyone else. I wanted a clean slate. Besides my religious beliefs,I never wanted to think that any guy came on her face or had his dick in her mouth. I NEVER would want to walk in a restaurant past a table of guys where one guy tells the rest what he did to her in bed. Then hear giggling from that table. I go anywhere with my wife and no one knows how she looks undressed. I don’t want to have to share my wife with any guys memories. We are for each other. Lastly, it is great to know that my children were born thru a vagina that has had no other guys dick in it.like I said no offense but this was the question and I answered it. And yes,I am married to an amazing wife. And no,I wasn’t a virgin

dat_db_doe · 2021-11-10T02:05:39+00:00

I am married but if I were dating it would extremely important for her to NOT be a virgin. I would want someone who was already experienced and comfortable in her sexuality.

moviefan1791 · 2021-11-10T02:08:18+00:00

If she has sex with other guys, then she should have sex with you. If she has sex with you without marrying her, why marry her?

DaphneDK42 · 2021-11-10T02:29:42+00:00

Not really. But my two wives just so happened to be virgins for some super odd reason.

green_view_analysis · 2021-11-10T02:31:53+00:00

I'd want her n-count to be below 5 or I wouldn't be interested. Just a personal preference for me. Beyond that is a non negotiable. That's just my opinion though. Everyone is different.

Creation_Soul · 2021-11-10T08:28:35+00:00

Both me and my wife had an N-count of 3 (we were each-others 3rd partner) when we got married. This fact has impacted our relationship 0%.

Prismatic_Symphony · 2021-11-10T10:28:08+00:00

A virgin would be pretty nice, but in my 30's it's not that realistic. I'm not a virgin, but my N count is low so I'd hope for a relatively low count in a woman too.

Even if by some miracle I found a virgin, there's the question of well, if she's still a virgin by now, what if her sex drive is super duper low and she trends us towards a sexless marriage? The things you want, whether you're male or female, come with potential consequences and that's one.

Jakeybaby125 · 2021-11-10T10:39:03+00:00

As long as we have similar body counts (which will likely be zero) I'm fine. If I'm a virgin then I'd expect her to be a virgin. I don't want to have sex knowing that my first time is with someone who's been rammed through more times than pencil sharpener

relish5k · 2021-11-09T20:17:16+00:00

Me (a woman): not at all

Women in general (unless religious): virgins are a red flag

Men: want their n count or lower (so lots of calls for virgins from incels, naturally)

baresquad · 2021-11-09T21:18:45+00:00

Marrying a virgin would sound like a marriage headed straight to divorce lol

I couldn’t do it. Marrying someone without knowing if there’s any bedroom compatibility would be a set up for failure

I prefer a partner with similar experience and sex positivity views that match mine, a girl telling me she’s never had sex before would personally be a huge red flag to me

fakingandnotmakingit · 2021-11-09T21:24:38+00:00

Lol

I'd rather they not be, because mate sexual compatibility is a thing. Personally prefer someone who sees sex the way I do. Not necessarily a big massive deal, but also not just a thing to do with randos. Actual number of partners and how doesn't matter.

In saying that, fucking men who want virgins but aren't virgins themselves are so deluded. Fun fact, most virgin women don't want high n count men so yes your body count matters too. Dont delude yourself otherwise. And as most virgin women at higher age brackets are religious, you better be religious too and follow that culture. Have fun.

flapperfemmefatale · 2021-11-09T20:01:25+00:00

At my age, virginity would be a red flag.

AnonymousAndy2018 · 2021-11-09T21:03:28+00:00

I think it’s preferable to find one. How you would go about it, I’m not sure.

The more sexual partners a woman has the less likely she can have lasting meaningful relationships. Same with previous marriages for her, chances of yours lasting are not good.

And there’s always one guy you can’t ever compare to that she had a fling with.

A divorce can ruin men so don’t play games or choose a partner poorly.

Nagscrom321 · 2021-11-09T21:30:24+00:00

I'm not religious but I'm numbers guy,and it's a higher chance of not being divorced,I know it isn't a guarantee but it's a higher good game of chance

CosmicBioHazard · 2021-11-10T00:17:13+00:00

What's your view in virginity in a spouse and why?

Assuming I do marry? absolute requirement.

Do you hold yourself to the same standard, e.g., you're not a virgin and would not hold it against your spouse for not being a virgin since you slept around?

I saved myself for marriage, before ending up divorced. Not being a virgin has me pretty much ruined for marriage, because I’m a romance hedonist and could never appreciate a woman enough to commit to her for a lifetime unless she can give me the full brunt of the experience the likes of which you can only get when you’re new to the concept of sex and haven’t suffered any desensitization whatsoever. A given woman’s only real shot at getting my commitment anyway is if she appreciates me like that.

Gray-Amoeba · 2021-11-09T20:03:07+00:00

When I was younger I really preferred that but at 31 I just hope she has less than 10 partners sadly.

oneandonlyA · 2021-11-09T21:03:41+00:00

It would be it plus. But for me it’s like saying it would be a plus to date an A-list actress, however much of a plus it is, it is nonetheless unrealistic at least when you’re from a secularized and liberal country like Denmark where I am from.

Fleischpeitsch · 2021-11-09T19:55:04+00:00

I wouldn't want a virgin. I love sex and thus want a partner that also loves sex and not some prude religious asexual partner. Virginity is a red flag to me.

Despite what the virgins of the manosphere claim in reality most men don't care, and in fact women care more about low n-count than men.

https://www.bustle.com/articles/97433-more-women-than-men-care-about-a-new-partners-sexual-history-says-new-study-and-over

Far more women than men want to know about their partner's sexual past, according to a new study by sex toy company Love honey.

Not only do 36 percent of women want to know the intimate details of their partner’s sexual past, but women are also more likely to talk about their past partners. Of those surveyed, 44 percent of women were more than happy to volunteer information about their exes, compared to 39 percent of men who did the same, and 76 percent of women talk about lovers from their past with their current partners. Men, at only 66 percent, are still in the majority, but definitely less chatty.

According to the results, 45 percent of men “deliberately avoid” talking about their exes, while only 38 percent of women also do.

For 27 percent of women a partner’s sexual history has complete and total bearing on whether that person will make a good partner. You know, because forget qualities like honesty and kindness. At 21 percent, men aren’t too far behind women in this thinking.

According to the survey, 29 percent of women and 21 percent of men would be “put off” if someone they're dating had a high “number.”

But while there are those who lie by decreasing numbers, there are also those who lie by increasing numbers. Of those surveyed, 31 percent of men and 12 percent of women actually inflate the number of their past sexual partners as a means to impress the new person they’re dating.

As a spokesperson for Lovehoney explains, “All our research shows that the happiest couples are those who are open and honest with each other, particularly in the bedroom. A significant number of men and women do tell white lies about their sexual pasts, but the overwhelming majority are honest.”

For 27 percent of women a partner’s sexual history has complete and total bearing on whether that person will make a good partner. At 21 percent, men aren’t too far behind women in this thinking.

According to the survey, 29 percent of women and 21 percent of men would be “put off” if someone they're dating had a high “number.”

And despite the virgins of the manosphere using their solipsism to claim that no man would want to date a woman with a high n-count, in reality it's actually just virgins that want virginal partners while studs prefer sluts.

http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/00224499.2016.1232690

For long-term relationships, in contrast, there was virtually no sex difference. Thus, contrary to the idea that male promiscuity is tolerated but female promiscuity is not, both sexes expressed equal reluctance to get involved with someone with an overly extensive sexual history. Finally, participants with an unrestricted sociosexual orientation (high SO participants) were more tolerant than low SO participants of prospective mates with higher numbers of past sexual partners but were also less tolerant of prospective mates with low numbers of past sexual partners.

https://www.researchgate.net/publication/5964280_Matching_in_Sexual_Experience_for_Married_Cohabitating_and_Dating_Couples

Romantic partners showed a significant level of matching in the prior number of intercourse partners. Further, among the married couples, a higher discrepancy between men's and women's number of previous intercourse partners was related to lower levels of love, satisfaction, and commitment in the relationship.

tl;dr: More women than men care, but there's also strong matching. High n-count people are usually looking for and pairing up with other high n-count people, while virgins are looking for and pairing up with other virgins, which explains why the manosphere has such a strong preference for virgins.

Wildhouse83 · 2021-11-09T20:16:23+00:00

A man must be completely out of his mind to have a spouse nowadays.

Desert_butterfries · 2021-11-09T20:03:27+00:00

It's not important to me. I am Catholic but I've had premarital sex and my sex drive is pretty high, whenever I meet someone again, that someone should have a high sex drive also. An experienced man that knows what he is doing is much better than a man that doesn't know where the clitoris is, how to finger properly, or has poor stamina in bed.

over348 · 2021-11-09T20:31:21+00:00

Not important, I just want a spouse with low body count

kyjolski · 2021-11-09T20:32:13+00:00

I'm 32 and not looking to date high school kids, so it is of zero importance. If anything, it would be weird.

Fudstersecured · 2021-11-09T21:21:06+00:00

It’s not particularly important. I’d wonder about the circumstances surrounding someone’s virginity just like I’d wonder about the circumstances surrounding someone having a ton of partners.

klauskinki · 2021-11-09T21:33:31+00:00

It's totally fundamental to not do that

How what to marry a vergin? Besides pedos, of course lol

Sewud · 2021-11-09T21:42:19+00:00

For me I grew up in a liberal culture where parents and teachers encouraged young people to have safe sex and I had the expectation that nobody would be a virgin by the time they get married. I had the expectation that anyone who has a boyfriend or girlfriend would be having sex and I had the expectation that most people would maybe try one failed relationship and then find the right one. So it's not very important to me.

OwnerAndMaster · 2021-11-09T23:39:32+00:00

Spouse? Well I guess I wouldn't marry an American unless she was a virgin. But any body count qualifies for girlfriend

Zcuzz · 2021-11-10T01:39:59+00:00

That's pretty much impossible at this point.

Also, why the fuck would any man in his right mind get married?

yodreadd · 2021-11-10T04:30:27+00:00

A 101%.

scutfarkas23 · 2021-11-10T05:40:41+00:00

It was important to me. I waited for marriage and am glad my spouse did the same.

acornfroggie · 2021-11-10T06:39:33+00:00

Fully important. I would never touch a non-virgin man. Yuck.

AtomicMGTOW · 2021-11-10T00:27:22+00:00

I am and always will be a man that speaks about Virgin or something close to it and that's the point. If a man says he wants a virgin, whoa, good luck buddy. And all I mean there is that if that's his preference will good for him and he shouldn't be shamed for it.

I'm saying good luck as + in if you haven't found your virgin by like 18 years old (end of high school) the chances of you finding one after that are very very slim especially outside of it a religious context.

However I am a huge believer that women lose the vast majority of their ability to really bond with a man after three dicks. Sometimes what I say this women will also say that it appears to happen to men too but I haven't really seen that borne out in the stats but even if it was.....

When you add in the fact that women tend to marry up (hypergamy) but then you also add in the fact that the state just divides everything down the middle when there is a divorce. Only the man stands to lose.

It's not black and white but he is going to end up losing more than she will because he was already making more or generating more than she was.

If you notice this doesn't happen in the business world - if you and I are going on a business together and I put in 30% of the costs and you put in 70% of the costs, I get 30% out and you get 70% out.

So as long as a woman marries a man that makes even slightly more than her let's say $10,000 a year. And let's say they're married for five years and then she filed for divorce (which women do anywhere between 80 and 90% of the time) and they split everything down the middle... She just earned $50,000 in interest (let's say) in 5 years.

And that money only came from one place, the man's labour.

It gets more disgusting the less the woman works. But no one cares. As Arthur schopenhauer pointed out a woman makes her way in the world by what she 'suffers'. So basically after the fact she claims that she had it so hard and if she wasn't compensated for it or all the things that she claims to have given up.

I'm on a roll with this and I think I could go on for too long but I need to get back to your original point. A so-called worldly experienced woman that has been promiscuous is probably quite impulsive and probably quite hypergamous. That's a short-sighted woman who if she was investing in the market would be betting on high risk but potentially high-return stocks. But she's betting on it using her main capital which is her youth beauty and fecundity.

When you're young you have more time to put your investment into something with consistently steady growth. As you get older if you start to invest when you're 50 it's probably not the best to take the lowest risk investment for most regular people. You got to take some rest to be able to get some reward.

The women that I know that were low and impulsivity and got married just after high school and they went to work and he went to work they eventually built Capital together over 20 years. By the time that's complete both of them have invested so much that it really is difficult to say who did what when everybody starts slinging mud and casting stones and each other. And you know what at least the guy can say he got this young and hot almost virginal woman and he had her for years.

Watching women step off the cock carousel 30 thinking they're just going to keep placing high-risk bats and then being pissed off when no one is taking them up other offer is f****** ridiculous.

The best payoff for a man is to get her young with the lowest body county can possibly get / afford.

The only reason why it seems to so many women that by the time they're 30, there are 'no good men left' is because they spent their life trying to do quick hop short-term investments trying to gain as much as quickly as possible almost like they were going to die tomorrow.

Get yourself the calmest least impulsive least hypergamous woman you can possibly get who's also as pretty as you can get and as sexual as you want.

Edit: a couple spelling mistakes than annoyed me enough to have to do an edit.

PlayfulLawyer · 2021-11-09T20:21:19+00:00

Some of the women on here are going to be like "are the guys virgins themselves", and while that's a fair enough point, just to reiterate men and women are different🤷‍♂️, and just because you require certain traits in a spouse does not mean you have to have those exact same traits yourself

But actually answer the question, not important at all, I've been with one virgin and I always appreciated and respected the fact that she chose me to be her first, but yeah for my wife , not important at all

TheBookOfSeil · 2021-11-09T20:41:00+00:00

Not important but it would be cool and make sex more meaningful.

pubgmisc · 2021-11-09T22:41:07+00:00

Chaste is very important yeah, is the future for your man important? would you date a homeless man, who has no future? why not? especially if you have to become (and enter the dating market later), whereas women are born with value

ididntwanttoexist · 2021-11-10T01:08:51+00:00

Virgins or guys who have only been with people they intended to have long-term relationships with are of equal standing, as long as it's mostly by choice. Anyone who has had casual sex, or wants to do that, is not going to be right for me. I've only had one previous partner, but I'd prefer someone who had been with five actual girlfriends than a guy who'd had one drunken hookup. It doesn't have to necessarily be conscious choice to "save himself" or whatever, could be that he wasn't that motivated to date, is asexual, he's really picky, a combo of factors, etc. That said, if he has dumb reasons for not doing so, those are just as bad as being promiscuous, i.e. religious and/or waiting until marriage. As long as he's not desperate, or angrily seething about it, I don't care.

Bardox30 · 2021-11-10T05:26:28+00:00

Not important at all, but I'd like her to be the kind of person who has sex in a committed relationship. Too many ONS might turn me off.

ToughAnswers · 2021-11-09T20:07:21+00:00

spouse

Lol it's current year if you're someone who cares about partner sexual history it's best just not to commit in the first place

Puzzleheaded_Bet7294 · 2021-11-09T20:25:03+00:00

I mean it’s just not realistic to expect a virgin partner past 20 so how is this a relevant question

Lateralanouncer · 2021-11-09T20:39:08+00:00

Red pill actually have an article of this. Basicly if wanting an ltr every man has to make a choice. A slut that can satisfy you sexualy that Other men sexualy trained her by removing things such as gag reflex. or a unicorn that is more ...

Double standard. Yes. Both men and woman have different sexual advantages and disadvantages. The act of sex. A woman lays down opens her legs and let's a man fuck her. at what cost/value. Drunk night our vs married to husband.

The real question is why are woman even questioning the double standard. We all know what's going on we a woman let's a man fuck her..

IHaveSalesQuestions · 2021-11-09T20:12:31+00:00

I straight up would not marry a virgin. That’s like signing up to get married and be a sex-Ed teacher. Hard pass.

rosesonthefloor · 2021-11-09T20:40:48+00:00

I prefer non-virgins, so they have a baseline to work from and I don’t have to teach them everything.

AFthrowaway3000 · 2021-11-10T04:36:49+00:00

Only a fool would buy a car without test driving it first.

Throwaway18077 · 2021-11-10T00:05:42+00:00

Men who want to marry virgins want this because they’re so insecure that they can’t stand the thought of their wife being able to compare sex with them to other partners.

If a man isn’t very religious yet tells me he wants to marry a virgin I would assume he is so insecure about himself that this is the only way he can cope. I’d then get very far away from him because he’s dangerously projecting his insecurities onto others and I wouldn’t want to be a victim.

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meme_lords_unite · 2021-11-09T22:37:07+00:00

Its not important.

akticker · 2021-11-10T01:04:20+00:00

I would not want my spouse to be a virgin that would suck in the bedroom. Nor would I want my spouse to be women that fucks everybody giving the pussy away like passing out business cards. I would want her to have a little respect for her self. Shows she had no discipline and was that she would be able to cheat on you very easy.

Nyanu · 2021-11-10T01:52:08+00:00

I don't really give a fuck just don't have STD's or be like this one girl at my work who literally fucked like half of the dudes there. I care more about the context of your past and if you're capable of making sound decisions.

SaltyFatNuts · 2021-11-10T02:30:10+00:00

I don’t care I think it’s unrealistic to expect men and women to wait for marriage I give zero ducks about purity culture but if someone wants to wait till then by all means.

NewGuy6456 · 2021-11-10T03:08:20+00:00

It's subjective to the peoples beliefs. If you've explored yourself sexually perhaps would align better with someone else that has. Likewise if you haven't. But then again someone that has explored can teach you a thing or two and that can be fun. Mostly it's the religious community that like to wait. The humping after marriage business is thriving well and good. The secular community don't wait before marriage and they appear to be doing fine as well.

WheelIntelligent1354 · 2021-11-10T08:44:54+00:00

Not at all but I think there's something comforting/fun about being my spouse's first.

Danielcraigboston1 · 2021-11-10T17:02:29+00:00

None.

Assasinized · 2021-11-12T06:21:21+00:00

Quite important, for the sake of my sanity mostly, I don't want to imagine the person I'm with to have done it with other people. I completely hold myself to the same standards. (Not religious)

BruddaMSK · 2021-11-12T09:43:51+00:00

0% importance.

ndkdodpsldldbsss · 2021-11-14T19:15:57+00:00

Why the hell would I even date a virgin lol? It is the one most certain way to meet someone who is terrible at sex.

introversed · 2021-11-28T05:54:17+00:00

I personally couldn’t give less of a damn.

purplish_possum · 2021-11-09T23:30:55+00:00

Not the least bit important. Indeed being a virgin past 20 is a huge red flag.

_Oh_Be_Nice_ · 2021-11-10T02:16:10+00:00

I wouldn't want to have sex with a virgin because my instincts tell me they're terrible in bed. Marry one? Hard pass.

YourAverageTurkGuy · 2021-11-09T22:24:29+00:00

non-important. not a virgin so don't expect my future wife to be a virgin either.

Plane_Bandicoot · 2021-11-09T23:19:54+00:00

I don’t care either way. The dealbreaker would be marrying someone who did care. I had a very religious upbringing and am no longer religious at all, and I find it extremely creepy when people want a virgin for reasons other than religion. Even when I was a virgin (lost it at 25, so later than usual), I would’ve considered anyone who cared or thought I was “pure” to be a massive red flag.

DeliciousPussyNectar · 2021-11-09T23:52:20+00:00

I’d prefer she wasn’t

theosamabahama · 2021-11-10T03:26:17+00:00

Zero. That's Spanish for zero.

ffandyy · 2021-11-10T12:08:47+00:00

Can’t see any rational reason for requiring a virgin unless you are either heavily religious or heavily insecure

jojomcflowjo · 2021-11-10T12:58:01+00:00

Not at all

Title	How important is it for your spouse to be a virgin?
Author	mathisfun100
Upvotes	27
Comments	398
Date	November 9, 2021 7:45 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/qqblyd/how_important_is_it_for_your_spouse_to_be_a_virgin/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/how-important-is-it-for-your-spouse-to-be-a-virgin.1085010 https://theredarchive.com/post/1085010