If 40 percent of the American population is obese and makes less than 50k a year, is really hard for men to get women?

purplish_possum · 2021-11-07T05:55:51+00:00

When you take resource management classes the first thing they tell you is that resources are not evenly distributed. The fact that women are having babies with hoodlums in Detroit, St. Louis, and Baltimore or that women in trailer parks in Kansas and Oklahoma are settling for very mediocre dudes doesn't help a sexless computer programmer in Silicon Valley get a date.

Kentucky_Supreme · 2021-11-07T00:06:21+00:00

I make more than $50K and I've exercised regularly for years (not a male model but definitely not obese. Decent shape, I suppose). I'm completely invisible.

I get matches on dating apps and "some" dates but they're very few and far in between. Women never show interest in person.

But even so, I've seen plenty of examples of couples in real life where the guy is no more attractive than myself or clearly less attractive (chubby, shorter, etc.) And yet they have a decently attractive woman with them that is clearly into them. Not saying I see this "all the time" but more like occasionally. No idea how they do it.

Head-Language-2977 · 2021-11-06T23:46:56+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Puzzleheaded_Bet7294 · 2021-11-06T23:32:24+00:00

It’s not even just that. Even the guys who aren’t obese and make over 50k a year are struggling, so you can’t just look at numbers and make general conclusions

M3taBuster · 2021-11-07T05:21:38+00:00

Two problems:

If 40% of men are obese, in theory it would be easy to outcompete them. But if 40% of women are obese too, provided I'm not interested in them, then they cancel each other out, and I'm really in the exact same position overall.
We tend to be defacto surrounded by people of a similar socioeconomic class. Sure, there are some poor women in trailer parks that would be easy to pick up if I'm more wealthy than them, but in order to be more wealthy than them, I have to live in or near a major city to commute to my high paying job, where it's too expensive for them to live. So I'd have to deliberately nerf myself just to come into contact with them regularly, and in doing so, I'd lose the advantage I had anyway.

antariusz · 2021-11-07T06:01:38+00:00

I'll make 200k this year in a low cost of living area. I do just fine with women, I'm overweight but not obese (although probably borderline). The thing about income though, is it's not just ok to have it socked away in a 401k though, plenty of unassuming millionaires out there with a pension fund... but if you want to attract female attention you have to do with with ostentatious displays of that wealth. They love the flashy sports car, the home you own and live in by yourself, they want to insert themselves into your life.

Settling for a relationship is different than getting casual sex though. I've gone through various stages of my life from an "average" average meaning 5/10 dude who was a virgin until 25, cracking the top 20% in my latter 20s, cracking the top 10% ish from about 30-35 along with some what are now illegal but were then legal dietary supplements, and then back into barely 20% which is where I feel like I'm at now,, which is where I'm happy with, and women definitely still engage with me and I just got out of a 4 1/2 year relationship and can easily jump back into one shortly, not that I have a LOT of success on tinder and other dating apps, but I'm having "some" which is enough for me. The amount of attention you receive from women increases exponentially as you climb the ladder of fitness and success. When I was 30, I really wanted to see what it was like to be in that top 5% man, and well, I think I got close enough to get a glimpse of what it was like, but my income lacked a zero, and my height was too short by about 3 inches and I spent about 2 few hours a week in the gym to really crack that barrier of attractiveness for women. I went all out one week on tinder (in the days prior to the swipe lockout) and bumble and okcupid and meetme and plenty of fish, and one week I had sex with 7 different girls in 7 days as a challenge to myself. I figure the only difference is that I put in a lot of effort towards getting laid that week where a truly top 5% man could spend FAR less effort towards it.

Taipanshimshon · 2021-11-07T03:33:28+00:00

" getting a woman" isn't difficult.

Getting a non obese decent human being is.

Ciao7991 · 2021-11-06T23:48:18+00:00

Those statistics are for all ages. The numbers for obesity in the 20-30 age range, which is the most active period for dating to most people, are very different.

superlurkage · 2021-11-07T04:16:24+00:00

Women aren’t as thirsty as men

Im_The_Daiquiri_Man · 2021-11-07T00:44:09+00:00

You left out the part where a good number of young fat women are content to cram themselves into a tight dress and reinforced heels, pile on maximum makeup and live off drunk hookups with hot guys at 1:50am.

Then they get to hamster the reason that fit guy that pumped and dumped didn’t call back is because “he can’t handle a real woman”

Finally, they can nurse their self esteem back by getting gassed up by their friends and social media with “body positivity” nonsense.

Rinse and repeat and you have a large demographic that won’t “settle” for their physical equal.

Oh, and those same buttergolems will turn around after spending 10 years on this hedonic treadmill of delusion and yell at men about “mUh unrealistic beauty standards” with a straight (fat) face.

Meanwhile their equivalent male counterparts live an isolated life of video games and porn until they get their shit together or their will to engage in life dwindles further.

CimZim · 2021-11-06T23:28:37+00:00

40% of the population makes less than $50k? Or 40% makes less than $50k and is simultaneously obese?

Lonelybuthopeful9 · 2021-11-07T11:29:56+00:00

Some people here really believes when below average men lie about their sexual success.

Hell, some even think LTRs are automatically = having sex.

Truth is most guys who you think are getting laid, are actually not.

AidsVictim · 2021-11-07T01:37:22+00:00

If 40 percent of the American population is obese and makes less than 50k a year, is really hard for men to get women?

It depends. For men it's really the middle class that's fallen apart. Many guys that are living in rural areas (or conversely in poorer urban areas with the same trends) where obesity is higher and incomes lower typically marry/have kids earlier and date other fat lower income people. The bar is low and the roll over it. They often have very unstable social-sexual structures, but they succeed in a certain sense. The biggest challenge for men in these areas are that women tend to move out of them.

But let's take a look at the average single middle class urbanite/suburbanite. They make decent income (50-100k in medium COL city) but it's not impressive. They're maybe a bit overweight, or even in 6 pack in shape but that's not impressive either. Their social networks are probably small, maybe consisting of only other average/nerd men. They're not shy but they're not Casanova either.

These men are boring to their female equivalent. They have nothing to offer them besides stability. The women in this bracket value excitement and/or breaking into the UMC/UC because they can provide stability on their own. The main things the men can improve (income, fitness) don't matter to these women. If you're not popular/charismatic or especially handsome most women in the same socio-economic sphere aren't going to be interested except as the backup option.

The upper class generally has little problem being matched up.

rivetcitymayor · 2021-11-06T23:52:23+00:00

You looking at it the wrong way. If 40% of men are obese and not making much money, the remaining 60% now becomes the new 100% and women will date at most 40% of those men

SDW137 · 2021-11-07T05:14:19+00:00

You can be in shape (or at the very least, not obese), make above the average income for your age, and be at least slightly above average height, and still struggle with women for other reasons. There's other things like personality, facial features, location/proximity that play a role in your dating options.

Stevefr0mYellowstone · 2021-11-08T04:31:44+00:00

Have you familiarized yourself at all with women's standards? The woman who is 100 pounds overweight and makes $40,000 a year doesn't view the man who is in the same position as her equal. She is disgusted by him. She views her equal as a man who isn't overweight at all and makes at least $80,000 a year. So imagine what the standards are for a woman who isn't overweight.

M_LaSalle · 2021-11-07T00:59:25+00:00

80/20. You're part of the 20 or you're not. If you're in the top end of the 80, then no matter how rancid the bottom end of the 80 is, then you're still in the 80.

Any questions?

Electronic_Ad_4748 · 2021-11-07T00:13:06+00:00

Look at anyone 18-22, almost everyone is normal weight. This is even more apparent in upper-class neighborhoods. The obesity thing is only for older adults who let themselves go after marriage.

AggroWeasel · 2021-11-07T12:07:25+00:00

Average and below-average women are just as narcissistic as above-average women and won’t date their counterparts. They’ll spread their legs for Chad, though.

This then excludes a large portion of men from the SMP and RMP.

totalnerve438 · 2021-11-07T13:37:42+00:00

Dating standards change. Looking at a 40-50 year old that has been married for 15 to 20 years is not relevant to how dating is now.

The statistic most relevant is the fact that nearly a third of men aged 18-30 reported having no sex in the past year, triple the rate 15 to 20 years ago.

purplish_possum · 2021-11-07T01:08:13+00:00

Here’s the thing, women still demand physical requirements that just aren’t possible to meet for many guys. Height, looks, and race are stringent requirements now.

SonicBackScratcher · 2021-11-06T23:29:44+00:00

No, but they don't want those women, they want attractive, college educated, in shape, good families, no major flaws like drug addiction or smoking, loyal, etc.

So they are looking at that top 10% or so of the female population and wondering why they are going for that 10% or so of guys.

cvslengthbucketlist · 2021-11-06T23:49:19+00:00

Yeah it doesn't work that way, you're not compared to other men based on a national average, you're compared to other men in your immediate dating environment, because people date others who are 1) attractive to them and 2) easily accessible.

So if you happened to live in a high COL area like NY or SF then even if you were skinny, college educated, and making 100k a year you're still considered "average" to the women in your city.

Obviously this could either work to your advantage or disadvantage, depending on whether you have the opportunity to relocate to a different city or get a better job. Or alternatively if you happen to be "fit" and "well-paid" by comparison in a town where most men aren't, on average.

Circ-Le-Jerk · 2021-11-07T01:42:10+00:00

70% of women are overweight --- Just a bunch of fatties not wanting to fuck fatties.

wtknight · 2021-11-07T02:26:31+00:00

There are just as many overweight or obese women as men, and that's not the kind of woman that an average looking guy in decent shape wants, so his choice of women is going to be lower than what it could be from the start. Furthermore, a lot of average looking fit women and even out of shape women expect to date good looking guys. Sure, these women will eventually settle down with their attractiveness match, but that's not before they ride the CC trying to hook a high value guy. This is AF/BB, and what TRP advises men to avoid.

I think that the men who do complain the most, though, are usually very unattractive themselves, or, even more likely, they have major social issues and no game at all. Most women aren't going to be attracted to these men, even the less attractive or overweight/obese ones. Even if they aren't into trying to hook a high value man with casual sex, they would rather be single than be with someone who doesn't attract them.

BrodieDharma · 2021-11-07T02:39:41+00:00

It’s more about game, sex appeal, and masculinity than LMS. Those are overstated.

There are average built, average height, below average earners who are slightly above average in looks, but above average in charisma & understanding the psycholgy of arousing women.

A lot of them are the men with the most success with women for casual sex and sometimes for marriage

Also, in smaller towns, being sheltered causes some women to not see many opportunities to successfully get in the swing of being hypergampus, and settle down with The most compatible overall man they can find in high school or College, then settle down with him & start a family.

As a man, you either find her when you’re both young or have to learn how to attract women and that point you attract the type of women or side of them depending on your bait & if you unable to use sex appeal, game, and masculinity, you will have to compete for women with your looks, money, and status, which are things on paper that don’t help as much as one would think unless it is in a context of profession that a woman fantasizes having sex with & that way of dating will expose you to being in the hamster wheel of chasing after women

Barneysparky · 2021-11-06T23:21:21+00:00

I've seen guys here call supermodels a 6.

I think that's all that needs to be known.

They would not have the problems they have if they went for their actual looks match.

TheBookOfSeil · 2021-11-06T23:55:43+00:00

Yes. More women than men are overweight or obese and women typically want men that make more than they do, not the same amount. That means +$60k, but usually $80k or above.

Mark_Freed · 2021-11-07T06:02:37+00:00

Men who complain and are red pilled and incels etc are all mostly voluntarily celibate. I’ve noticed late virgins usually have high standards. They don’t just want “some women”. They want their queen.

Sure any guy who just wants a female can get it, you just need to put in a bit of effort at gym, diet and work. But these guys want a girl they are attracted to and they also want her to be attracted to them. That’s hard and it’s got to do with expectations, more than objective income or body fat percentage.

Jakes1967 · 2021-11-07T07:07:27+00:00

If 40 percent of the American population is obese and makes less than 50k a year, is really hard for men to get women?

Firstly, let's tackle the "Obesity epidemic".

The USA moved the midpoint BMI for an average person from 28 to 23. When I was running half-marathons, my BMI was 28.5. We used to run 5Km & 10Km for charity, almost weekly and in fatigues, with a T-shirt.

Today a US male at 5'9", weighing over 203lbs is obese. I know plenty of bodybuilders and powerlifters, who top 203lbs, hell I know normal manual labourers who weigh more.

Secondly the sub $50K thing. If you're outside a city, that's enough money for the average person to live off. Also the group earning sub 50, are mostly aged between 34 and 16.

This is a calculated earnings and I'm betting, that this includes the unemployed, students and single mothers. The more youngsters you add, the lower the average wage goes.

DillonTheFatUglyMale · 2021-11-07T13:52:53+00:00

Are you suggesting men should try to get obese women? These women aren't even considered honestly.

WomenHavItHarder · 2021-11-08T02:24:09+00:00

It depends. For context I’m physically fit and my income is above average.

Getting with old, fat, and unattractive women is easy if your income is higher than their income and you’re physically fit.

I never dated a woman who was old, fat, and unattractive, but I’ve hooked up with a few of them. One of them was a fat woman in her early 30s. She had a dead end job that earned her about 35K a year. She also weighed around 200lbs and was about 5’7. I could’ve easily started a relationship with her if I wanted to, but I knew I could do better.

Getting with young, fit, and attractive women is harder. The difficulty varies based on the area. In NY it’s very difficult, in WV it’s easier. I know because I managed to get with a young, fit, and attractive woman in WV, but I couldn’t get with any in NY. Women in WV earn low incomes, are surrounded by men who earn low incomes, and have limited options. In NY it’s the opposite, women earn more, the men earn more, and there are a ton of options. Regardless, getting with a young, fit, and attractive woman in WV requires more than 50K a year.

ToughAnswers · 2021-11-07T00:28:45+00:00

Who is having kids with the girls in the barrio or hood? It’s not high earning “alpha males”.

Proportionately most alpha males aren't high earning. Good deal of them are in and out of jail, as it's incompatible with modern life.

yungthrowaway97 · 2021-11-07T09:21:29+00:00

It's not hard. When guys complain about not getting women it really means not getting women I want.

gofigure62 · 2021-11-07T18:53:42+00:00

Dating struggles are over exaggerated by incels and red pill men. Poor people regardless of health, wealth, and stability will always date, have children, or get married. They don't expect a high quality of life, so pairing up is one of the few "luxuries" that they have.

The men complaining about the "dating market" don't want poor women or fat women. They want the 2% cream of the crop women to settle for their recessed chins and mediocre lives.

I think the problem with many people is that they don't realize that other people are completely uninterested in what they're offering.

For example, you have low income obese men that are prediabetic, that are extremely sexist and belittling of women. Yes, he's allowed to want what he wants, but who would actually want him is anyone's guess.

You also have low income obese women thay are prediabetic and have absolutely given up. They don't like themselves, don't feel like they have anything to offer, and they have no energy.

People either have an overinflated sense of superiority, or they're saying "fuck it" and jist living out their lives alone.

Wellrounded people are becoming an endangered breed.

poppy_blu · 2021-11-07T00:16:58+00:00

Question for men here who say they worked out, paid attention to their appearance, and earned a good salary but still got ignored by women, why do you think that is?

I mean did you go out and try to meet women or did you just rely on tinder? If you did go out to meet women did you approach and how did they react?

Did you have a co-ed network of friends?

Sekina7 · 2021-11-06T23:59:18+00:00

News flash : The hypocritical guys of PPD who cry about women’s unreasonable standards and women not wanting average men also simultaneously degrade and humiliate overweight women who they READILY admit aren’t even worthy of a pump and dump let alone. Relationship and these men ARE NOT CHADS. Most men do not want average women either because average women in the western world are OVERWEIGHT 🙄…

heyitsjeape · 2021-11-07T00:59:42+00:00

Is English your first language? This is written terribly if you’re a native English speaker.

ScholarMore5267 · 2021-11-07T01:03:29+00:00

Well I'm well over 6ft, make well over 100K a year, full head of hair, and have a 6 pack, bench 225 (1 rep max, could be better) and get maybe 1 match with a overweight girl on a good week on tinder. When I'm desperate I will invite them over and usually they are down. So who knows.

SwinginPastMyKnees_ · 2021-11-07T00:44:43+00:00

Most people do not find fat people attractive. Even fat people want to date fit/in-shape people. I don't fault them for that. We all like what we like.

The fact that 2/3rds to 3/4ths of the US population are overweight or obese means that there are fewer attractive people to choose from. So, yes, it makes it more difficult to date when you have to shrink your pool by more than half. If you fall on the fat side, you're likely also discounted by a good number of fat and healthy-weight people. If everyone was at a healthy/ideal weight, there would be less resentment from both men and women. We do not encourage people to be at a healthy weight. In fact, with HAES/FA, we encourage people (women, in particular) to be/stay fat.

As far as salary, women want a man who makes enough to cover BOTH his and her salaries. In my opinion, I think that's fair, since women might need time to stay at home after giving birth. So a guy can't just make the same salary she does. He'd need to make more than 1.5x what she does. So if she's making $50k, he needs to at least make $75k. On top of that, social media has added more pressure to "keep up with the Jones'". Women control a majority of household spending, so it falls on the men to make enough to afford the luxuries that she wants. Given that, you can see why women want men to make more than $100k even though she might make less than half of that. And you can see how the average earning man gets overlooked even if he's making the same as her.

LillthOfBabylon · 2021-11-07T10:28:36+00:00

It's not hard for men to get women. It's hard for men to get casual sex with women, and the men bitter about that just claims that "All women are secretly fucking Chad and won't fuck me" because they can't handle that porn lied to them.

EDIT: .

Given these factors, are dating struggles overstated by “below average” men?

Yes.

We all have seen very ugly dudes with wives.

Because the ugly dude has a great personality and/or has a great bank account. These guys whining have neither.

WheelIntelligent1354 · 2021-11-07T12:39:02+00:00

In my expirience obese poor women will claim their desire for a hot guy but will accept a date from a similarly fat and lower income man.

ThaRoastKing · 2021-11-07T01:37:12+00:00

It also kind of depends on the age range too tho. For the most part, men and women don't start becoming overweight and especially obese overnight. People usually start gaining weight after age 26-28 and down become obese until they're beyond 30.

Obviously there are many obese people who are under 30 but again it takes time. It's a combination of letting go and bad American diet culture.

So for the most part, it's still non-obese/overweight people 18-29.

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redback-spider · 2021-11-07T04:06:26+00:00

Why would you try to "get" women. Retaining relationships is the job of women, man have won if they get the women in the bed. After that it's her job to keep you.

And I would suggest to have that mindset and if that means that you end up alone, so be it, because you having standards makes you more attractive so if you end up alone with those standards and that abandance mindset, you would have ended up alone anyway.

You should also not care, women were told to be man, especially black women, so just take the lessons they learned which hurts them because they are no man, but this lessons would be good for you.

Be independent from women, it's not your fault it's her fault, and better yourself for you, for your health for other reasons but not to get a women.

If you can't love yourself, no women will (probably). So don't base your self worth on the appreciation from women.

midwesternMD · 2021-11-07T04:24:05+00:00

Meh, I’d say it can be pretty hard. I’m fit, earn 6 figures, decent conversationalist, generally acceptable personality, etc. Buuut. I’m short and Asian. It can suck pretty hard out there. And historically, it has. Thankfully, COVID dating dynamics have been kind to me.

BMTEJ · 2021-11-07T05:30:09+00:00

No, there's people on all different social standings. The only time finding a date becomes hard is when you don't try.

GoodApollo506 · 2021-11-07T05:50:08+00:00

It’s all about Looks, Height and Money…

As a guy you need at least 2 of the 3

TheyCallMeBigAndy · 2021-11-07T07:51:25+00:00

I am 29, 5'11", East Asian and make around 130k. I usually get 3-4 matches a week and those ladies are younger than me. I am quite picky and get bored very easily. If the lady is not very responsive or interested in me, I would just find another one to chat with. I won't invest too much time in one person.

I recently found that I can match with more people if I lower my expectations. I will see how it goes..........

DarthYug · 2021-11-07T08:42:18+00:00

Have you seen the movie “Idiocracy”

Wildhouse83 · 2021-11-07T12:11:04+00:00

It is, because women have standards according to which at least 80 % of all men are ruled out. Some requirements are regaring attributes a man can not change anyway, like height, ethnicity or bone structure.

geo_gan · 2021-11-07T14:59:02+00:00

Bad grammar in your question makes it difficult to know what you are asking.

What does “is really hard for men to get women” mean?

Do you mean “Is it really hard to get women”? As in a question.

Or do you mean “It is really hard to get women”? As in a statement of fact.

Ohmylordyjesus · 2021-11-07T17:18:54+00:00

Have you not seen some of the women in this country? 😬

iceEdi209 · 2021-11-07T17:26:01+00:00

Unfortunately this mean we gotta step out game we gotta exercise lose weight and be better looking no longer does the average guy get hella bussy only the sexy Instagram model gets play so ig we gotta be Instagram models to

TackleOk3608 · 2021-11-07T18:07:23+00:00

I’ve never met a man that wasn’t able to get dates. Most guys at my work are in a relationship or going in dates.

Lateralanouncer · 2021-11-07T19:13:26+00:00

It would be interesting if the obesity stats link to income and marriage . Point being I today's dating market according to red pill. To get woman you need gym and AF traits. Not BB traits not university. Not provider income. Not marriage. not being a "good guy". You need gym and protein powder and etc

Are fatter people married. Are higher income earners married.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2021-11-07T19:45:39+00:00

Too may 49ers - Fours that think they are 9s. Thank you, Instahoe.

Ok_Razzmatazz_1751 · 2021-11-07T20:53:11+00:00

Lol , That Jordan Peterson guy said if you are making over 40k a year then you are apart of the 1% in the world. Hence part of the problem for the poor in the world .

Moneydamjan · 2021-11-07T23:56:12+00:00

its not hard to get a woman, but to get a hot woman or even above average for most those men is near impossible

thincelll · 2021-11-08T03:06:35+00:00

You can be fit, healthy, sexy and fat!!!

theosamabahama · 2021-11-08T03:19:39+00:00

That number 50k is probably household income, not individual income.

The real number is 35k for individual income.

The bottom 40% are making less than 35k.

The top 45% of americans are making more than 50k.

BallsFace6969 · 2021-11-08T10:28:32+00:00

You've finally nailed it. This group only discusses the gender dynamics between men and women who look like models , while 0% of posters fit in that group

PaidByPutinBot123 · 2021-11-08T13:18:02+00:00

https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/series/sr_11/sr11_250.pdf

This study shows men are materially fitter than women, more so than the 7% naturally lower Body fat % men have over women. IE: Men's muscle mass makes them look obese when they are not.

EX: Me @ 195 lbs @ 5 7 with 32 inch waist with BMI 30. All from lifting.

timeforsheroes · 2021-11-08T20:54:51+00:00

Men don't want fat women. A healthy bodyweight and a nice body is more important to men than women. And, on the money side of things, women's earnings has increased, relatively, over the last 60 years, and men's has decreased. Meaning that men have less to attract women with.

So, both of these developments negatively impact men more than women.

Zerofication · 2021-11-18T23:48:58+00:00

Getting a loser woman to date isn't too difficult for most men, it's the young ones with above average looks that's out of option for most men. Also, maintaining relationships/marriages in the long run is far more difficult than starting them even for top tier men.

stats135 · 2021-11-06T23:41:45+00:00

Difficulty is relative. When relative to women? Yes, it's hard for the average man. When relative to men in every generation prior to ours? Yes, it's hard for the modern man. When relative to having any other needs satisfied? Yes, it is hard to get sex from women.

Title	If 40 percent of the American population is obese and makes less than 50k a year, is really hard for men to get women?
Author	Danielcraigboston1
Upvotes	132
Comments	384
Date	November 6, 2021 11:16 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/qobseo/if_40_percent_of_the_american_population_is_obese/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/if-40-percent-of-the-american-population-is-obese.1085524 https://theredarchive.com/post/1085524