I was scrolling Twitter getting my daily laughs and stumbled upon this tweet on the timeline:
Me handpicking the parts of toxic masculinity that I like and that benefit me:
insert gif of Beyoncé risibly selecting options on an Nintendo DS
Another woman’s reply to her tweet:
getting the mixture just riiiiiiiiiiight:
insert gif of Salem the cat stirring a potion
In general I always find the women of “black twitter” to be the most jovial and honest about everything we discuss daily on PPD. They approach this stuff with a level of irony and light heartedness.
There’s a book titled “Bad Feminist” by Roxane Gay where she explores what it means to want certain options for yourself as a woman, but also, for example, unapologetically find yourself attracted to masculine men.
Speaking from a USA lens, in general I find black women or really any group of women who still self identify as hyphenated — “Irish-American” “Italian-American” “Polish-American” “Chinese-American” “Texan-American” etc. to be pretty darn pragmatic about all of this.
But I digress, here are my questions:
How do you define “gender equality”?
Do you find your definition at odds with your desires?
Do you find this “hypocritical”?
Here are my personal answers:
I view it as having the option to do what I want understanding there still may be consequences to that. As long as there are no institutional blockers. For example yes I should be allowed to work wherever I want if qualified. Yes this may mean I may out-earn many men potentially making them less attractive to me for the longterm.
Not really. But I typically never feel bad about wanting what I want. I’m just realistic that my desires are particular and I’ll have to make concessions in some aspects and be okay with it. C’est la vie!
To me no. To someone else? Maybe.
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