Passionately Kissing > Sex when it comes to assessing a woman’s raw sexual desire.

[deleted] · 2019-01-30T20:33:36+00:00

This is a CMV post. ALL TOP COMMENTS MUST ATTEMPT TO CHANGE OP'S VIEW. Your own statements about what you personally prefer belong under automod.

GridReXX · 2019-01-30T18:29:16+00:00

Actually I think it's a better way to assessing her overall desire for you, not just sexual desire.

apube · 2019-01-30T18:45:47+00:00

I think you may be conflating "raw sexual desire" and general relsationship desire a bit, which often go together, but not always.

Her eagerness to cater to you is another - meals cooked, happy shoulder rubs all the time, she always wants to cuddle and be right up under you, etc.

Women do this kind of stuff for people they're not sexually attracted to though. Women do this in dead bedrooms. Women who aren't that into sex do this. This is a good indicator for how invested a woman is in the relationship itself, but not necessarily the sex.

THAT SAID, I totally have witnessed women use sex to secure men, so I agree with you in part. But if she's not having sex with you it's often because she lacks the raw sexual desire for you. In that last post, I'm not so much saying "if she fucks you she's attracted" as I am "if she's not fucking you she's probably not attracted"

Also if what you're after is a relationship where you have lots of sex, it's best to select for women whose sexual desire is expressed in like, actually having sex with you.

Electra_Cute · 2019-01-30T18:57:21+00:00

What is the argument here.

jax006 · 2019-01-30T20:54:53+00:00

Better indicator than plain old starfish sex? Yea I agree.

But there are certain sub-acts of sex that are even better than a make out sesh if you ask me.

The one thing I've noticed the most is blowjobs. All of the girls I dated who were super into me not only willingly gave blowjobs but did so without asking or without reciprocation ect. They will for a long time and will swallow or do whatever

It makes sense for something like a blowjob to correlate with attraction because it is WAY more in the camp of "I don't rly enjoy this but am doing it for you" as opposed to making out or having sex which is not as much of a service from one party to the other, but much more mutual

Crook56 · 2019-01-30T18:22:25+00:00

Makes since. Sometimes the thinking on this sub is border line brutish.

Me see meat, me like meat...Me eat meat.

Like dude, take some time and season that shit!

Barneysparky · 2019-01-30T20:53:42+00:00

My husband doesn't really like deep kissing, I do but I don't ask for it often.

Ways I show my husband how much I love him is more like he catches just watching him with "love eyes" out of the blue, or I just tell him how sexy he is.

Sex imo is one of the last things to stop when couples stop showing love for each other. But there is a lot more to the equation then the examples you give.

Like say your idea of what a woman stops when she doesn't desire is baking. While it's true that I like baking for my husband cause I love making him happy I don't bake for him everyday. Sometimes I don't have time, keeping it healthy, neither of us feel like a sweet, lots of reasons. Doesn't mean I don't love him.

-OpportunityCost · 2019-01-31T04:29:19+00:00

Kissing is great cause I'm always able to tell just how much the girl is into me. I do enjoy a nice make out session even if there is no sex.

hammerhaunts · 2019-01-30T18:27:24+00:00

It's stupid to say that raw sexual desire wouldn't include having sex with you, at that point it's not sexual.

wokein · 2019-01-30T19:29:20+00:00

For me personally, I don't want to kiss someone I don't want to fuck.

Physical contact is physical contact, whether that is kissing or fucking.

blahblahthrowaway888 · 2019-01-30T22:38:57+00:00

I agree with this. Any wife can have duty sex with a dude. If she genuinely wants to kiss you passionately a lot of the time, she finds you very hot.

Scatre · 2019-01-30T18:54:08+00:00

women fuck men they can’t physically stomach for the sake of security or another ulterior motive.

And prostitutes have kissed me more passionately than girlfriends.

Kissing has always been sexual, and assessing a woman's "raw sexual desire" is pointless when you're not having sex with her. Kind of silly that this needs to be said.

I don't enjoy sex because it's some ego validation from women; I enjoy it because my penis feels good.

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GridReXX · 2019-01-30T19:21:44+00:00

What if the making out doesn't lead to sex?

[deleted] · 2019-01-30T21:51:30+00:00

Honestly everything you've described is how I've experienced being loved.

And not in that bullshit reductionist 'comfort' way - actually feeling fucking loved by someone, I've never experienced this without the sex but that's incidental.

-this- is what I think ppl are looking for.

CainPrice · 2019-01-30T22:59:28+00:00

I'd argue that the two are equally useful, versus kissing being > sex as an indicator of desire.

That's partly why kissing should never be a climactic end of date activity. Guys who want to get laid should be kissing in the bar, making out in the parking lot, and never making it to the second destination they had planned. You can tell from the first kiss whether she's down.

But some girls are bad kissers. And some that want to avoid mixing feels with casual kiss just enough to get wet but avoid serious makeouts.

statusincorporated · 2019-01-30T23:13:40+00:00

First of all, you've phrased your viewpoint in a way that makes little sense (to me at least):

I don’t view a woman acquiescing to being fucked as a clear sign that she’s sexually attracted to a man.

I'm sorry, but a woman having sex with a man is a clear indicator that she's sexually attracted to a man. It's the act of sex and her choosing to do so.

Now, other factors may modify this presumption and indeed, some may overcome it altogether. But that does not mean that sex itself is not a clear sign of sexual attraction.

So, I'm going to phrase this in a better way...

...I think you mean to say something like, 'acquiescing to being fucked is not a clear sign that she puts the man in the category of ''high sexual attraction.'' Because while sex is a sign of sexual attraction, it in and of itself doesn't mean she thinks you're just omg the sexiest dude ever or in that top tier.

And because TRPers are obsessed with being "alpha" (top tier), that's what the concern is.

There are other indicators.

But sex is the most important one. So what we're really doing is saying that sex is necessary but not sufficient to conclude that this woman places you in the high tier of sexual attraction.

Her eagerness to passionately kiss you on your mouth or all over your body is one.

Her eagerness to cater to you is another - meals cooked, happy shoulder rubs all the time, she always wants to cuddle and be right up under you, etc.

Again, in my day I’ve seen too many women fuck men they can’t physically stomach for the sake of security or another ulterior motive.

First, I doubt you've really seen this in your day unless you're talking about actual prostitutes and sex workers. Women complain about men they sleep with all the time, and they can exaggerate. Rest assured, if she took her clothes off for him, he was good enough. Great? Good+, even? Maybe not.

Second, all the other stuff you listed is just differences in how people express their love and affection.

Some women love kissing, some women like it less. Some women like kissing all over the body, some women like it less. Some women enjoy being hostess and cooking and massaging, and some like it less.

That stuff can say something about the man, but most often you're just describing the variation in women and their 'love languages' so to speak.

The real test?

Does she repeatedly seek you out to have sex with you even if you're not in a committed relationship?

Is she available for you to have sex as much as she can be?

Is she down to try new things with you?

During sex, does she tell you about how great you are, etc.?

If they keep coming back and seem like they enjoy themselves, then you can safely assume you're in a high, if not top, tier.

Are you the guy she calls when her and her bf break-up? Before they break up?

Repeat business is the best test for your tier.

exit_sandman · 2019-01-30T23:22:16+00:00

Passionately Kissing > Sex when it comes to assessing a woman’s raw sexual desire.

Okay, I'll CYV.

Last girlfriend was like this. Did kiss passionately though.

Lev-- · 2019-01-31T00:11:44+00:00

Eh. Completely depends on the person.

Definitely not a constant or even a consistent view.

SavingMasculinity · 2019-01-31T00:55:06+00:00

Thank God I am a Chad now and no longer have to boggle my mind with this shit.

GridReXX · 2019-01-31T01:18:56+00:00

I don’t view a woman acquiescing to being fucked as a clear sign that she’s sexually attracted to a man.There are other indicators.

Of course it isn't a clear sign they do it for other reasons all the time.

Again, in my day I’ve seen too many women fuck men they can’t physically stomach for the sake of security or another ulterior motive.

Even you agree.

Her eagerness to passionately kiss you on your mouth or all over your body is one.

Her eagerness to cater to you is another - meals cooked, happy shoulder rubs all the time, she always wants to cuddle and be right up under you, etc.

But you may be wrong about these.

Some women are ... hum... willing to bet in a hurdle for some other motives.

Also, some women do behave like that by another reasons, Like some women who do these kind of things to feel better after cheating on her partner.

You should always take everything into account. Because it is hard to make everything all the time.

Kissing passionately then is more like yet another variable to check.

BlindingTwilight · 2019-01-31T02:18:07+00:00

Women give out kisses like candy. I can’t even count the amount of women who I have made out with. So no I think fucking is the only metric.

mistercheeez-o____O- · 2019-01-31T02:38:44+00:00

So this is one of these things where you are paying more attention to the comments that run contrary to your ideas and ignore the ones that don't. You can't unanimously assert that the men on ppd believe x.

Anyway, you have a point, but it doesn't exactly create the dichotomy that you are attempting to establish here. There is glaring subjectivity.

Then again, that's the intended purpose of cmv. I gather.

Cheers.

TheLongerCon · 2019-02-01T00:17:10+00:00

This has to be a joke. Girls will make out with anyone. They will go on a date with a guy, make out with him and ghost him like nothing.

BirdManBrrrr · 2019-01-30T19:44:10+00:00

Her eagerness to cater to you is another - meals cooked, happy shoulder rubs all the time, she always wants to cuddle and be right up under you, etc.

Miss happy housewife may do all that out of dedication and obligation a la tradcon, religious 50's wife meme, not necessarily because she desires you in some primal way. YMMV woman to woman, but I've seen them feign enthusiasm and desire rather well.

I was in Amsterdam wandering the RLD and a hooker gave me one of the best "fuck me pls I want you" looks I've ever experienced. Obviously she didn't want me, she wanted my money and was doing her job. Same with waitresses flirting for tips; women intuitively know how to play the game.

Her eagerness to passionately kiss you on your mouth or all over your body is one.

I do agree here, it's subtle but the cues are there on desire vs. obligation physically.

shoppingWithHerIsHel · 2019-01-30T21:46:10+00:00

When you kiss a woman you are basically kissing all the dicks she's ever sucked, which knowing modern woman, is likely in the double digits. At least when you fuck her, you're only rubbing dicks with another dude, which isn't as gay as kissing one. That's why it's better to fuck on the first date, and kiss never.

Title	Passionately Kissing > Sex when it comes to assessing a woman’s raw sexual desire.
Author	GridReXX
Upvotes	70
Comments	207
Date	January 30, 2019 6:09 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/alfifx/passionately_kissing_sex_when_it_comes_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/passionately-kissing-sex-when-it-comes-to.257547 https://theredarchive.com/post/257547